Sometimes I forgot that Dallas Winston, was only seventeen.

Seventeen. He'd seen so much, you didn't even have to ask Dallas to know, his eyes gave it away, the dying set that they held that made you just shiver, his eyes were like a cold winter, and about as hard. He didn't like me, I wasn't sure I liked him either, but we understood each other or something like that. He just sat there, his shirt cast aside on the floor by him, 'rust' stained, he knew and I knew it wasn't rust. But both of us seemed fine with keeping it that way, my hands were shaking as they held the once pristine white gauze to his side, he didn't flinch. He barely felt it I was sure. He didn't even make like he noticed I was pressing a sizzling and nasty sounding disinfectant into his fresh wounds. He looked off to the side, bringing in a sharp inhalation through his teeth, tapping a thumb on his thigh. Maybe I'd been wrong in thinking he couldn't feel it, my fingers were red and I wanted to wipe them clean so bad my arms shook, not that it made much of a different, they'd been shaking anyway.

Yeah I was real tuff, Dally looked down at me for the first time in forever, it was like he'd just noticed me there. His eyes fixed on me, and we were silent for a long time after. I guess, this is a good time, to mention that weird feeling I got in my gut, that weird twisted feeling I got that made me sweat and made my head light. That weird feeling that made my palms clammy and my skin pink. That weird feeling I started to get around Dallas Winston. Anytime I saw him, or heard his voice. I don't really know what it was, I mean I didn't even really like him all that much, did I.

"What?" said Dallas after a moment, I shrugged, what what? I didn't even know what he wanted to know, I guess maybe I'd just been staring too long and he'd picked up on it. Who knows. I'd read a book once about how you sense stares, and that often it was just paranoia and that the more paranoid you are the more likely people are going to look at you, it was some kind of science fiction, and I'd never really understood how that worked. He kept looking at me, glaring through half lids as he reached into my pocket, taking a cigaret he struck up and shoved the thing between his teeth, shaking the match out he threw It down on the coffee table by most of his other things. Dally wasn't an extremely patient guy, so I guessed he wanted an answer quick. Well hell, I didn't know what to tell him. Oh by the way Dally, I was thinking how your eyes are so dead looking, ain't that strange? You noticed that?

"You should go to a hospital." I huffed out, but right after having said it, I wished I'd just sat awkward for a while, Dally was used to me doing that. Just closing my mouth up and saying nothing, nothing at all. But no for some reason, I had to say something, and I hadn't even thought about what I was saying when I'd said.

"Do you want me to put YOU in the hospital?" Dally snarled, I bit back my reply, cause he would do it alright. No fear of Dally going back on his word. It didn't do me any good to get sassy with him, it'd do so much more harm than good. He shook his head back and forth and rested it on the couch pillow again, the blonde locks falling together in clumps. I went back to cleaning him up, how he'd gotten off so bad, literally, he didn't tell me what had happened. I felt round for a bigger bandage and wrapped it around him a couple times to keep the gauze in place. I may not have been the best nurse but I was all that was home. Darry and Soda were working, and it was a Friday night.

"There," I said, barely above a whisper, running a hand through my hair, it was sticking up all around the place no, but I didn't care. It was just Dally, and he didn't look much better. He sat up though, and I'd have thought he might cry out, but his lips stayed pressed together as he sat, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. The fan was beating kind of cooler air down on our backs, but it was hot. It always was this time of year in Tulsa. I could tell I was probably pretty sweaty too, but I got that way when I was nervous too. And trust me, working on a tough JD'S stab wound, would make anyone nervous. I didn't show it though, you learn not to after living in a place like this long enough. Dally stared at me a while, I don't really know what he was thinking, but he had that tense set in his ice blue eyes, that made me wish I did. On the other hand though, I don't really want to be inside his head, I don't want to see what ever it is that made his eyes look like that. Its not like he ever gave any indication toward what it was, but sometimes when he was bragging, I just got the feeling, he didn't really feel that way about whatever it was. He looked mad now, but he always did, I think now it was just specifically because I'd been staring back again. I quickly averted my eyes with a lousy shrug of my poor-postured shoulders. He sighed, shaking his head and leant back agains the couch back.

"I should shoot through-" He began, but I cut right across him.

"Th-that ain't a good idea Dal, ya might break that there w-wound open again," My voice quivered under the look he gave me, and I frowned heavily, and If I'd had the sense of a billy goat I'd have curled right up and not said another word, "Well c'mon now, I just fixed it up for ya so gimme a little credit!" And I don't even know where that came from, nobody said that kinda stuff to Dally, you respect him or else. I guess I earned the slap to the upside of my head I got at that.

"Shut your trap kid, you don't know shit." He leered at me, he didn't sound as mad as I thought he might, and though the side of my head hurt like heck, I didn't touch it. I guess I didn't, how was I supposed to when he didn't tell me anything? I don't really know why I was holding my breath at that point, just that I was.

"Did that hurt?" He asked me, his voice rough and gravely, low toned considering his age, but he'd grown up too fast, so I guess I got why. I shook my head, it was a lie, of course it hurt. "Talk." He demanded, he didn't ask, he didn't question, he demanded.

"Yeah." I whispered, and I hadn't even meant to, I'd been sitting there along planning to say 'no'. I had no ready to roll from my lips. But thats not what I'd said, and I winced, looking down at the dusty floor boards, green eyes scarcely looking up. He didn't say anything for a minute, and then he raised a hand and ran it through the locks of hair on that side of my sore head. Not real gentle like or nothing, just through. I raised my head a little then to look at him, his features where contorted in an expression unreadable, it was knew, it was not a look I'd seen on his face before now. It was caught between anger and a sort of, desperation, just a hint of frustration. Now that there, was what confused me.

"Dally?" I asked, sort of blinking up at him. He didn't answer me, not like I'd expected him to or anything like that, but I wanted something. He was being too quiet, that was another thing, sometimes he was quiet. Broody kinda quiet. I didn't like it. His fingers were still through my greasy hair, and he was still staring away from me. I sat there awkward, starting to go a little red, playing with my fingers in my lap. I guess that was when he did it, see I don't remember much out of that moment now, cause it was all of a sudden that it happened. His rough, chapped lips grazed mine, over the soft skin of my chin and the line of my jaw. Then my lips again, my kinda dry lips, he fixed that right on up. They weren't so dry once he was done with them, his lips moved against mine like it was a natural thing that we were doing, and his hands got on me like they belonged there. Rubbing at my back through the material of my shirt and clutching it tight in his rough, bruised fists. Sometimes his eye lids would wrinkle up like he was closing them hard, his mouth almost devouring mine. He wasn't all that gentle either, it wasn't like I'd expected him to be, but he bit my bottom lip and rolled the flesh between his teeth, enough to pull a gasp out of my mouth. Thats what he'd wanted, pushing my body down to the hard sofa now, his beaten bruised and scarred broad shoulders loomed above me, somehow, I'd never noticed the lean side to him he had, he was tough, and sure he was built good. But like me, and a lot of greasers, he was muscularly lean, if that even made sense.

"W-What are you...?" I tried to question him, but then he started whispering to me, things, dirty things, god awful things that made my back arch and my skin crawl. All of them, or most, were about me. And then every so often, he'd say something sweet, something so hot my eyes rolled back and I bit my lip to shut up a dumb whimper.

"Go with it, baby." He muttered finally, and I found my chest heaving

He didn't let me get much breath in that wasn't a sharp inhalation of surprise. My bruised lips started to burn, but he didn't stop, and he didn't slow. For the first time in a while I was glad the house was all mine, we were making enough noise to rouse Soda from the deepest of sleeps, his grunts and my half moans. His lips somehow got from mine to my neck and started leaving a wet trail there. Which suited me fine enough, my head pounding as I let it fall back to the arm of the couch, taking in the breaths my lungs had been demanding for the past ten minutes then in short sharp intervals. Fingers laced with his blonde locks. I'm not sure what it was that made him think this was okay to do, but it made me think the same thing. Maybe it was just that we didn't really like each other, so it wouldn't' matter, and it wouldn't matter that we were both boys.

"O-ouch Dally!" I moaned as he bit a little hard, I kicked him lightly and he grunted, biting harder. "Ow!" I half gasped, biting down on my lip.

"Shut the fuck up, your ruining it, kid." He muttered into my skin, somewhere near my collar bone. When people said Dally Winston could cuss could, they weren't lying. And all of a sudden, his cold callused fingers were dragging soft tracks down my chest, where was my shirt?

"Dallas, put my shirt back on me." I barely managed to make my words heard, my voice had disappeared so far down into my chest, my color was brighter red then I could compare to anything.

"No," He replied, his hands running tracks, up down up down my chest. "And don't call me Dallas, if you like your teeth in your mouth."

"I can see why you don't get laid often, do you treat your cheap broads like this?" I asked softly, my head so far gone I couldn't believe I'd said that, my hands slapped over my mouth cautiously. Dally pulled back and looked up at me.

"What?" He looked kind of amused actually, and over all pissed off, but that was nothing new. I used a hand to touch my neck, and I could feel the marks he'd left, soft and not so soft bites.

"You're an ass hole." I heard myself say.

"Never said I wasn't."

"No but.. really, you're down right awful sometimes."

"Whatever." It was like he didn't even care, sometimes I thought I'd say something, and it would get him so mad. Mad enough that he'd hit me, but right now he wasn't any madder at me then he was usually.

"Well, you gonna stop there?" I asked, sitting up slightly, covering myself to the best of my ability. God why was I asking? I should have been relieved he'd stopped touching me. I should have been shaking and crying from what he'd started to do to me. But I wasn't, and damn it I didn't know why. I was kinda mad, and more then a little uncomfortable.

"You killed my mood." He said, and I guess that was a yes, he was gonna stop. I took a deep breath in, he was still looming over me though, and it made me nervous. I closed my eyes and took a deep shaky breath in. I couldn't tell if I was relieved he'd stopped, or disappointed.

"You know I can't love you." He said, out of the clear blue sky, I didn't know why he was saying it. And I went bright red when he did, my eyes closing a little tighter.

"You could try." I found myself saying softly. See what I mean? I just really wasn't thinking that night, my brain was in a far off place. I heard him snicker. And right after I heard the door slam.