So, I noticed that there weren't any stories about the Lich on this site and I decided to change that. I had to send an email to the admins to have him added as a character, but once he was added I decided to put up my story.

...it is a bit different that what is normally seen of this archive. I hope this fact can be appreciated.

Disclaimer: Don't own Adventure Time.


It was cold out, as he would have expected from the place that he was told to await for his master, and the Lich looked around studying all the snowfall around him. It was a lonely feeling, an oddly calmly serene one, and it was in this moment of solitary contemplation that the Lich wondered why he was subordinate to anyone at all. He was an agent of chaos, a force of destruction and reckoning, and yet not once had he been given permission to raise a hand against the kingdom of ice.

It would be easy enough for him to destroy, magic was his slave and the power of the frost could do little to stand against him, but he knew that his master would never allow this kingdom to fall. The Dark One had a rare soft spot for this certain part of the Land of Ooo, and the Lich knew better than to openly question or challenge the authority of his master. His magic was a great weapon of suffering and doom, a weapon much more powerful than the bombs that had covered the Earth in fire, but even this magic was nothing but a plaything to the Dark One.

As he stood alone in the snowfall, as he contemplated the fact that the world was now just a glorified wasteland, the Lich began to wonder about the past. So many wars, so much destruction, humans slaughtering one another for the most petty of reasons...it sounded like a time in history that he would have very much enjoyed. He had read many grimoires in his long life, these grimoires contributing to his ability to cheat death, but one thing that had always fascinated the Lich were the books of the people of the God of Abraham.

Once upon a time there were such things known as Christianity and Islam. They, along with another religion that was once called Judaism, were the dominant forces in the world before the bombs fell. He had read the books of these religions multiple times, the bloodshed that they caused filling the Lich with an odd sense of warmth, and it was the stories told within the Holy Bible and the Holy Qur'an that he truly found fascinating.

It wasn't the stories about men resurrecting from the dead or humans being accompanied by talking animals that interested him, such things being commonplace in the Land of Ooo, but what intrigued him were the stories of the being known as Satan. In Islam he was the Djinn named Iblis, before his fall he was the angel called Lucifer, the bright and morning star, and when he read about this Prince of Darkness he was only reminded of his own master, the Dark One.

The books also spoke of a jealous God who commanded his first king to slaughter entire cities, a God who sent an Angel of Death to slay all the firstborn sons of a place called Egypt, a God that destroyed the world with water just as the Dark One did with fire, and many other stories that caused a sense of familiarity within the Lich. This God, this all-powerful being, reminded him of the Dark One as well. If these stories were true, then the Lich was unsure whether or not his master would be Satan or Iblis, or if he would be Yahweh or Allah. It was a passing thought, a fleeting moment, but the Lich wondered if there was even a difference at all.

In any case, the Lich pushed these thoughts to the back of his mind when he sensed that a powerful evil was headed in his direction. It was enough to make him shudder and hesitate, this evil and terrible being the only force capable of doing so, and the Lich could feel that the Dark One was fast approaching. He stood there waiting as the snow fell even more, somehow quaintly feeling much colder than he ever had before in this kingdom of ice, and he waited silently as he saw a figure approaching from the distance.

When he saw the being that he was supposed to meet, the Lich went down on one knee and began facing downwards. This being, the Dark One, was the only person worthy of his fear and respect. The Lich usually wasn't the type to give adoration or veneration to any being other than himself, to any name other than his own, but he knew better than to stand against the Dark One. He was bowing to the same dark soul that was responsible for the Great Mushroom War of oh so many years ago, the same entity who slew Billy's magical dog companion, the one who had instigated the Rainicorn-Dog Wars, the one who had culled even the great Hunson Abadeer, and the being who was mighty enough to banish Grob Gob Glob Grod to Mars. The Lich rarely spoke, rarely kowtowed, but when he did it was in honor of the Dark One.

"What is your bidding, my master?"

The Lich remained in his position until the Dark One became closer to him, it wasn't his place to move unless given permission first, and his heart was filled with rage when he felt himself being patted on the head. It was nothing but a reminder to him of the fact that he was the property, nothing more than the pet and pawn, of the Dark One. Had it been any other person, even Death or the great Hunson Abadeer, they would have faced his wrath, but in this case the Lich knew who held the true authority at the moment. He was obedient to his master, as he had always been, and the Lich reluctantly accepted that he would carry out the orders given to him by the true king of ice and snow, the future god of the Land of Ooo. He bowed, as the rest of the world also would in due time, to a penguin named Gunter.


If you liked it, let me know. I like writing one-shots every now and again.