A/N: Midorima is such a square, I love him. Writing in diary format is incredibly fun.

I will continue this, I think, but don't expect updates very often! Or romance. Don't expect any at all. Midorima isn't mature enough for that stuff.

I do not own Kuroko no Basuke.

Diary JOURNAL

Property of Midorima Shintarou, esq.

'Man proposes, God disposes.'

KEEP OUT!

Takao, that includes you. You too, Kise.

Day 1

Oha Asa recommended beginning a journal. Am wondering if Takao has hijacked it.

Unfortunately, was not able to find journal. Had to buy diary. Said diary was also decidedly feminine. Mutilated cover with black marker. Much better, except it is now covered with demonic butterflies, as Takao got involved.

Day 3

Kuroko said something about statistics. As I am benched, will write this during training.

My name is, obviously, Midorima Shintarou. Green eyes and hair. Don't ask. Diagnosed with astigmatism.

Sixteen, six feet and five inches tall. Tall, but not like Murasakibara. Weigh twelve stone and six pounds.

Note to self: find out why people are measured in stones and feet. Imperial is rubbish, but somewhat more interesting than metric.

I like red bean soup, except when my mother is cooking it.

Day 3, later

Apologies. Coach needed pen, took mine, lost it. Am now writing with a purple one. Secretary hates me. Added to Revenge List.

Can play piano, due to snobby grandmother, also on revenge list. Personal favourite is Bach.

Am decent at shogi. Akashi is still far better. Akashi should also be in a mental institution.

Note to self: Akashi on anti-depressants? FIND OUT.

Am shooting guard on Shuutoku basketball team. Talent is perfect accuracy when shooting three-pointers. Orange jersey, number six. Orange does not like me or my hair. I do not like it back.

Hope to become either international-standard basketball player or doctor.

Am somewhat friendly with Akashi Seijuuro out of fear and Takao. No clue why.

Loathe Kagami Taiga. American idiot, as in that song. Also dislike song. Bad memories, due to hair colour.

Day 5

Am only child. Live in average house with parents.

Mother, Midorima Kaori, neé Morikawa, forty six. Light green hair, gray eyes. Absent-minded. Cannot cook. Professor of Ancient Japanese Literature at Tokyo U.

Father, Midorima Saizou, forty four. Dark hair, now greying. Easygoing. Cannot cook. Retired microbiologist. Uses wheelchair.

Parents are sickeningly in love. Grandparents distant due to pride. Dislike them.

Pet budgerigar, Kou. Green and yellow plumage. Has bowel problems.

Day 8

Oha Asa said to tell somebody something they don't know about themselves.

Called Kise. Told him he was a moron. Said something about sticks and rectums and hung up.

Called Aomine. Wish I hadn't. I pity Momoi.

Called Kuroko. Said that he knew he was a terrible basketball player. Pleasantly surprised. Told me to tell his coach that she is madly in love with Hyuuga Junpei.

Did so. Looked at me for a few seconds, started crying, told me to fuck off. Did so.

Later saw her and Seirin's Shooting Guard in middle of heated discussion.

Think Takao is broken.

Day 11

Mother tried to make sweet and sour today.

Do not think wasabi belongs in sweet and sour.

Currently sympathising with Kou.

Day 12

Lucky item was a bowl.

People began to call me 'Kappa.'

Am not planning on playing basketball with a bowl taped to my head ever again.

Day 16

Noticed Pocari's nutritional contents. Shuddered. Sticking to canned bean soup, even if Takao thinks it's disgusting.

Day 18

Met Kuroko and Kagami while trying to find decent food. Cannot survive on mother-issued rations.

Kagami asked me why I had a pinwheel in my pocket. Kuroko glared at him.

How does one eat so many burgers?

On the other side, vanilla milk shakes are quite nice. Have not revealed this to Kuroko. Unfortunately, think he knows.

Note to self: investigate telepathy. Believe Kuroko is a practitioner.