Disclaimer: Why do I bother? Since those morons at FOX cancelled DA in the first place, there's no use giving them credit for the idea. So, it's all MY genius that headed DA for s1 and had all the good parts of s2. and that includes that gorgeous hunk of a man known as Logan Cale. :P Unfortunately, I don't own the songs.
The Dark Angel Nation Campaign is awesome! In case you have been living under a rock for the last month, the URL is www.savedarkangel.net :)
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Now that all that informative junk is outta the way, you can get to the story. Uhhhm it's, interesting? Yeah, interesting. Makes no sense, but I need a distraction! Post FN but pre the final scene, Max reflects on her new status. Naturally, Logan joins her. Or unnaturally, I'm not sure. But right after I saw FN I started a story that got even more bizarre then this one. Yet I felt the urge to put it to good use. I apologize beforehand for any emotional damage inflicted during this experience. Unless you're Gail Berman. So read it or just scroll to the bottom, leave a review and pretend to have read it. ;-) I'll have the next two chapters up, like tomorrow, because I'm going out to the movies and have to get ready. Henceforth, I don't have the time to format and upload the end. Sorry. :-(
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
They say we're monsters, not worthy of being alive. I wish that they could feel what we feel and try to say that. We aren't monsters, not really. So we were made in a lab. What effect does that have on our humanity? Because what they're prosecuting us for-it isn't our fault. It never could be. Monsters are the people that hurt one another, the type of people the great and powerful Eyes Only fought against. Not us. On the top of a building, separated from the rest of the world, it seems almost impossible that any of this has happened. But it's stupid to think like that. Fact is, they want us dead, in a bad way.
"Not quite the Space Needle, is it?" a voice observed. Logan. Dear, sweet, moronic Logan. Why couldn't he just accept that they were over? Why should he? You don't, a traitorous voice muttered sarcastically. Which was true in a way, more then once I have thought about him in the not-quite-just-friends way. Like when he was examining the runes for one. Damn inner thoughts.
"Works just as well," I manage to mumble without looking at him. I can't, not without risking a break down and confession. Better to think that I am with Alec then to let him be hurt again. It wasn't so bad when we were fighting side by side- no matter what, our friendship was never in jeopardy. It's not like we could just hang out anymore, or do anything remotely phsycical, but deep down we were always still friends. But all of the sudden it wasn't life or death and things are back the way they were.
He plunks himself down right next to me, as if he doesn't care about the risk. Shit, I am not ready to deal with this. Sadistic cults I can handle, but not him. Deep down I'm not sure if I can sit next to him and not reach out to him.
~*~*~
With all of my heart, I know I could love
you
But, with all of my soul, I'm driftin away
With all of my mind, I know you could save me from myself
And anything else,
With
all of my strength, I wanna reach out for you
With every breath, I call out your name
With every step, I just wanna turn around and say
Baby make it okay
~*~*~
"You're doing a good job Max."
"Whatever. In case you're blind as well as stupid, we have 300 soldiers, some of them 6 years old, in a toxic waste dump with limited resources. There's no chance of getting out of the situation alive, because everyone in the free world wants us dead. Now that they know we exist, sweeping us aside won't work anymore." Maybe if I bitch enough he'll take a hint and leave.
"Not everyone."
Guess not. What is going to make this guy just give up? I'd be fine if he'd just accept it and move on. But that's not Logan. And don't act as if you don't already know that. It's one of the reasons you cared enough to look for a cure. And the reason you're letting him go.
"So if you're going to end up dead anyways, why don't you tell me the truth?"
"About what?" I ask, hoping to at least delay the inevitable.
"You and Alec."
"Hey, you're the one that saw us. Get a clue. Alec gets me, you don't. How could you, you can't even walk." I hope this works. I didn't want it to get harsh, but it's reached the stage where I don't know if I have any options left.
"I thought that didn't matter to you?" He doesn't even sound hurt. Somehow I feel I'm missing something.
~*~*~
But
I'm so afraid
that you've forgiven me one too many times
And I'm so afraid
to give my heart again, just to have a change of mind
And I'm not quite sure that you can trust me
And I would hate to have you find me again
Baby, like the wind, driftin away
~*~*~
He changes the subject abruptly. "Have you given any thought to the meaning of the runes?"
"Yeah, I'm the Holy Grail."
"Glad to see you can still be a bitch."
"Thanks." I stand up to leave. If he can't take a hint I'll just have to make him.
"Stay." Logan orders.
"Woof, woof. Feline DNA, remember?" But I sit back anyways. I need to see where this is going.
"My bad."
~*~*~
It blows and nobody knows where it's going to
(I'm driftin away)
It blows and nobody know what it's gonna do
With
all of my heart, I know I disappointed you
And although I'm real sorry
I don't know how to save this time
But, if I would lose you
I know I would go completely out of my mind
I'm running out of time
~*~*~
There is a moment of silence, and it lets me think. Something is
obviously very wrong. I know him well enough to know that he's not telling me
everything. For the first time I peek at him. He's staring out, as if unaware
of my presence.
~*~*~
And I'm so afraid that you've forgiven
me one too many times
And I'm so afraid to give my heart again just to have a change of mind
And I'm not quite sure that you can trust me
And I would hate to have you find me again
Baby, like the wind, driftin away
~*~*~
So I ask him. And all he does is stare at me.
"How could I turn off emotions that easily?" he mocked. Although it could have just been the shock of hearing me ask a question like that. "It's not all that hard if there isn't an emotion to turn off. Because when all was said and done, I took an evaluation, and realized that I never loved you. C'mon Max, I just wanted to lay ya…don't look so shocked. You're hot, and that's about all you have going for you. You're a heartless bitch, and I actually let It hurt me. You know that? I, Logan Cale, was actually hurt by you. Because I was convinced I loved you. The Cales don't try and get women to sleep with them. They'd rather pay for the service. But I wanted to see if I could do it. You think I cooked dinner for you because I felt something for you? Get real. Emotions are a weakness. Why should I care who you sleep with? And don't tell me it's over, because there never was anything to be over. Have a nice life." And he left.
~*~*~
It blows and nobody knows where it's going to
(Driftin away)
It blows and nobody knows what it's gonna do
(You see my heart at night)
At night you can hear it cry as the tear drops fall from heaven's eyes
(Fallin down)
And somehow you know it's true, these tears that fall are fallin for you
(Fallin for you)
~*~*~
I wanted to be mad, to scream and yell and cry. I wanted to hurt him as much as his speech had cut my soul. In that moment, I wanted to kill him, give him the final kiss, to do anything. But all I could do was sit in a haze of pain, praying that this was a bad dream. I never thought he could be like that. The entire time I knew him, he was always a gentleman, a kind and caring person. But I guess even I could be fooled. Because even as I searched his face for any sign of pain, he never wavered. He meant every word he said. After what seemed like hours of hazy deadness, it finally sunk in. Everything that I thought was real was a lie.
~*~*~
It blows and nobody knows where's it going to
(Fallin down)
It blows and nobody knows what it's gonna do
At night you can hear it cry as the tear drops fall from heaven's eyes
And somehow you know it's true these tears that fall are for you