Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural or Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Summary: Xander always thought Tony Harris was his father. He was wrong.

Spoilers for up to the finale of Buffy and to the Seventh season finale of Supernatural.

Things had changed since Sunnydale fell. He had gone to Africa to recruit slayers and seeing the wars and the poverty had been hard. Having only been able to save those that were slayers and leave everyone else had been hell. After he had come back to Cleveland, he announced that he wasn't going to be a watcher, because he was sick of just watching.

That was 9 years ago.

He still kept in contact with the girls who, over time, stopped trying to get him to give up hunting by himself. He was occasionally joined by slayers, witches, vampires or werewolves, especially if he was within 500 miles of Cleveland.

Another thing that had changed was his appearance. He had a lot more scars on his body and he supported a black leather jacket. Before he wouldn't have worn it just because Angel did. But leather protected his body and had saved his life more than once and, he wasn't that petty anymore. He also got his eye back when Willow found a spell that would do it with minimal complications.

He had been hunting for the last 8 years and was pretty good at it, if he said so himself. Even good hunters though, couldn't always find a hunt. That was why he hadn't been able to come up with any more excuses, so he was going to have to see his mom. She had been bugging him to come visit her for a few weeks. Xander didn't really want to see her though, because aside from his early years, she never been a great mother. What he really wanted to do was put her out of his head, which would be hard if he actually went to go see her.

His mom and Dad had moved, before Sunnydale fell in, to Florida. They had moved from one sunny place to another. The only way that his parents had been able to afford a house in Florida, was with the money that the government shelled out for those who had lost their homes and jobs in the cave in. That was the cover story for what had happened to Sunnydale.

He was closing in on the city and winced. Why was he putting himself through this? His mother had been a drunk since he was 8 years old. Any time he had asked her if she was coming to his athletic games, she would give some lame excuse and he eventually stopped doing extracurricular activities. They also stopped giving him money when it cut into their alcohol consumption.

His father had died 3 years ago in a drunk driving accident. Thankfully, he hadn't killed anyone other than himself. Xander had given his mom his cell phone number back then, in a moment of pity for his mother who had just lost her husband. He had regretted it when she had started calling him every day for past 3 weeks to come and see her. He finally agreed to come since he was between hunts.

He pulled off the freeway and started going towards her house. Xander had only been there once before, after the funeral for his dad, which he had gone to, even though nearly half the time he wished he hadn't gone. After the funeral, he had taken his mother back home when it became obvious that she had drunk something before.

He pulled in front of said house, parked and looked at the house. From the front, it looked nice. Lawn freshly cut, probably cut by some poor boy for a few dollars for someone who bought the outward appearance his mother liked to show everyone else. He hesitated awhile longer, contemplating just leaving, but if he left he would just be called every day again. With a sigh, he opened the door.

He looked up the walk and starting towards the door, which was difficult since his brain kept telling him to run away. He managed to find his way to the front door and ring the doorbell. It took a couple minutes before someone opened it, during which Xander had a hard time staying in place but managed it. The door opened, but it wasn't his mother standing there. It was a nice looking blond girl, in her early to mid 20's, wearing scrubs. The scrubs part is what worried him.

"Who are you? Where's my Mom?" Xander asked the quickly one right after the other.

"Are you Xander?" She asked in a friendly tone and Xander tried to calm himself down.

"Yes, I'm Xander. Where's my Mom?"

"Come on in," Xander winced, he thought he told his mother not to do that or let anyone else do it either. He stepped inside and the blond girl in scrubs closed the door before turning to him.

"Hi Xander, or would you prefer Mr. Harris?"

"Xander's fine. Where's my mother?" He tried to ask calmly.

"She's right through here," she started moving towards what if Xander remembered correctly was his mother's bedroom. He followed the blond girl into the room and when he got a glance at his mom and he didn't know what say. His mother was in bed, but not only that, she also had tubes and wires connected to her. The scariest thing was the heart monitor. She had an oxygen mask on and her eyes were closed. Fear started coursing through his veins.

"Mom," he whispered.

"Mrs. Harris? Your son is here to see you." His mom's eyes fluttered open and found his. Slowly she removed her oxygen mask.

"Xander?" she asked.

"Mom? What's going on?" She looked sad and regretful.

"I'm sorry Xander," Xander's heart plummeted. His mom used to apologize a lot when she had gotten drunk when he was young, but she hadn't apologized for anything since he was 16." I'm sorry for not being there for you as a child and young adult. I'm sorry I wasn't there for your graduation."

"I told you mom, that is wasn't safe to go to my graduation," he told her softly.

"I thought you told me that because you didn't want me and your father there to embarrass you."

"No, Mom there was a real danger and I was trying to protect you and Dad from it."

"Whether or not that's true, I still have other things that I'm sorry about. Like the fact you had to go on your road trip with your Uncle Rory's car, and the fact that we always said that weren't smart enough to get into college. I'm sorry that I didn't get to see you become this man you've become, because I can tell your a good man and we did nothing to help you become that way..." there was long pause "I'm sick," he had known ever since she had started talking about being sorry, the fact that her bed was full of tubes and wires had confirmed it. But hearing her actually say it caused him to crumple into the chair that was closest to him. He did his best to remain stoic.

"How long do you have?"

"Not much longer. It could be days, weeks or months." He closed his eyes briefly, so little time, he opened them again and focused back on her.

"Why didn't you tell me on the phone? I would have come sooner," he asked his voice breaking.

"Because I wanted to give time to come on your own. I would have told you on Monday if you hadn't come already."

"You can't be dying." He felt like a little boy at the moment.

"I can and I am," he took her hand and held it.

"Why?"

"I have cancer, liver cancer." From all the drinking she had done her whole life.

"There's nothing they can do?"

"I don't have the money and even if I did it's too late. They caught it too late." She was dying. She was really really dying.

"I'll stay with you until ...until the time comes," he said unable to say 'until you die'.

"Xander that's not everything. There's one more thing I've kept a secret from you, your whole life. Tony wasn't your father, at least, not biologically." He didn't realize that he slipped his hand out of his mother's.

"Are you serious?" That would be a terrible joke.

"Yes."

"Tony wasn't my Dad?"

"No, he wasn't." He wasn't sure what to think about that. All his fears of turning into his father because his genes were unfounded. Not that he knew that his actual biological father was any better.

"Who was my father then?"

"Your biological father was a man named John Winchester." John Winchester that name sounded familiar, but before he could get too far into that thought she continued. "We were high school sweethearts," she smiled wistfully. "We had these plans. John was going to be a marine and I was going to go to college and we'd wait for each other, and when John came back, we were going to get married. On the night before he left for the marines we...conceived you. I could have written him a letter and told him about you and he would have come back if he could, he was a good man. But I didn't want him to feel regret every time he looked at me or you, so I never told him. As soon I found out I was pregnant I found someone with a job and married him in the next two weeks before I started showing. Tony always thought he was your father."

"So he never knew? You sure that he didn't know?" It would be easier if he had known. The way he treated Xander would have much more explainable.

"I'm sure," she said weakly.

"I think that's enough for today." Xander jumped, he had forgotten that the nurse was even there. "She's very weak, she needs her rest." Xander got up from the chair and looked down at his poor frail mother. Normally he would have taken time to digest this information before planning to see her again, but she was dying and he didn't have that luxury.

"I'll be back tomorrow Mom," he bent down and kissed her forehead. His mother's eyes were already starting to close so he followed the blond girl, no nurse, his mom hospice nurse, to where the door was.

"Are you okay?" The nurse asked concerned, she had been in the room for the whole conversation.

"Honestly, I don't know," Xander answered shaking his head. "When can I come back?."

"Anytime, after 9 am tomorrow, is fine."

"Alight, I'll be here."

Actions