A/N: This is the final chapter in this little story. Reviews are greatly appreciated. More notes at the bottom.

It wasn't getting easier, but Cas was trying to adjust. He'd been so accustomed to Jess' weekly visit and eye for detail for the past three years that it became part of his life - his routine - but now all of that was changing. He just didn't know if it was for good yet. Dean was trying, he knew that, but he couldn't ignore the vice-like feeling in his gut and the war in his brain.

He just had to take a deep breath, ignore all those thoughts, and be thankful for Dean's help. Even if Dean was a sloppy shopper. He wasn't really sure what "pasteurized processed cheese food" was, but apparently Dean thought it was an ideal substitute for American cheese.

An obnoxious roar of an engine gradually enveloped his house. Dean was back. He had been expecting him all day. Jess worked like clockwork, whereas Dean showed up whenever. It didn't help calm his nerves, since he was forced to spend the day on alert, waiting for him to show up.

The engine cut off, so he waited by the door, unlocking it in preparation. When Dean eventually knocked, he opened the door a crack.

Dean stood there with a smile. "Candygram."

His stomach clenched. "Hello Dean."

"Wow, I think that's the first time you've ever said my name."

He frowned. "I guess..."

Dean shifted his weight a bit, "You know, these are pretty heavy..."

He was suddenly aware that he was standing there with arms full of his groceries. "Oh, sorry."

He pushed the door open a little and grabbed the bags from Dean. He mentally kicked himself as he brought the bags inside, nudging the door closed behind him. He dropped the bags on his counter and started putting the groceries away. It wasn't the same without Jess. It was almost lonely.

He heard Dean's voice, a jolt of panic shooting through him. "I need to talk to you about something important."

Dean had pushed the door open and was sticking his head inside. He hurried over the door, causing Dean to retreat. He put his foot be the door to block it from being opened further, and blocked the opening with his body.

"I had to pay for all your food out of my own pocket today."

He narrowed his eyes. "Why? Don't you have my card?"

Dean shrugged. "Yeah, I do... but the lady was kind of a bitch and wouldn't take it since I'm not an authorized user or something like that."

"Oh." He frowned. Figures it wouldn't be that easy. "So, what do I do?"

"Well, I kinda need the cash back... I figured I could drive you to the bank, and you clear up the confusion and add me to your account or something? And then swing by an ATM and get me a refund."

He froze. His mind immediately went into overdrive, and his pulse began to rise. "I can't do that."

Dean raised his eyebrows. "It's the only way if you want me to buy you food again. Unless you have lots of cash laying around."

"No, it's all in the bank..." he said restlessly.

"Then get dressed and I'll take you."

He felt his throat constrict. "... I can't. I can't do it."

"Why not? It'll be fine. I'll drive you. I can even go inside with you if you want."

"Dean..." Why couldn't he understand?

"Cas...?"

"Is this absolutely necessary?"

"You could always call there, but I think you need to show some photo ID. The Wal-Mart lady wasn't very clear on any of that."

He couldn't swallow. "I'm sorry." He started to close the door, but Dean stopped him.

"Look, Cas, I haven't got all day. I've got things to do, so get some shoes on and let's go. I was asked to help, so I'm helping."

He looked into Dean's eyes, unsure. "Just in and out?"

"Yup. Real quick. You'll be home before you know it." Dean smiled.

He let out a long sigh, knowing he was going to regret this decision. "Okay I guess."

"God, you look like you're going to a funeral. Lighten up a little. I don't bite." Dean said with a laugh.

He feigned a smile in return before closing the door. Dean climbed down the steps of the porch, and he went into full-blown panic mode. He hadn't left the house in years... Why was he now? Jess couldn't get him to leave, so what was it about Dean that made his brain scream 'run' and 'stay' at the same time?

He walked into his room, trying to find something halfway decent to wear. He hadn't bought new clothes since college, and he hadn't had a need to dress up in just as long. He also knew Dean was outside waiting, so he didn't have the luxury to be picky. The room was spinning, but he fought through it, grabbing a nice pair of dark denim jeans and a gray button up shirt.

He threw the clothes on and ran to his bathroom to make sure his hair was okay. He was starting to second guess this whole thing - he couldn't even look towards his toilet, else he knew he'd puke. Yet he was going to go through with it anyway. He could rationalize that if he did just this one thing, then he wouldn't have to worry about it becoming an issue again later. He took a deep breath and forced himself to swallow.

He stepped lightly down his porch, senses on high alert. Dean was waiting in the monster he called a car, and started the engine as soon as he made it off the porch. He made his way over to the passenger side as quickly as possible. The last thing he needed now was for someone else to approach and talk to them. The door was locked. Dean slid over towards the door and opened it for him with a smile on his face.

He hesitated a moment before climbing in, shutting the deceptively heavy door with a thud. He swallowed hard, feeling Dean's eyes on him.

"You ready?" Dean asked with a smile.

He buckled his seat belt. "Sure."

"You might need to show me where your bank is..."

"It's near the library, I think," he said quietly.

"Okay, we'll find it."

Dean reversed out of the driveway and sped off towards the library. Cas was regretting his decision. He stared out the window, hoping to distract his brain and calm the frenzy inside his stomach. Dean was silent and it made things worse. He decided to hum to himself to break the silence and attempt to calm himself.

He tried to convince his brain he was being irrational, that Dean was completely safe and that he was helping. Willingly helping. And that he wasn't being a burden on him. But his brain wouldn't listen to him. Every time they stopped at a stop sign, his brain pondered ways it could jump from the car, and how long it would take for him to run home.

Dean broke his trance. "Do you want me to turn the radio on?"

"No."

"Oh... Okay then."

He had to stop looking out the window. He didn't like the way his brain was thinking... He looked down at the floorboards instead, humming to himself some more. This way, he'd have no idea how far they were from his room, and he'd have no chance to ponder his escape.

"Hey, we're here."

"Oh." He was surprised they were there. And that he made it in one piece.

"You can run in quick."

He froze. He hadn't even thought this far ahead. "I guess."

"Do you want me to go with you?"

"...Yeah." As much as he hated to admit it, he really wanted Dean there with him.

"Alright. Let's go."

Dean climbed out of the car, but Cas couldn't move. His legs wouldn't cooperate, no matter how much he willed them to. Just this once. There was a tap on the window next to his face. Dean was standing there, looking down at him. He met Dean's eyes, but quickly looked away. He was wasting Dean's time. He slowly opened the door and crawled out. He didn't look around, he couldn't. He walked towards the bank, keeping his eyes on the ground. Dean held the door open for him, but he couldn't bring himself to make eye contact or even thank him. He just walked inside.

There were a lot of people inside. And there was a line. Of course. Dean joined the line without hesitation, and Cas quickly joined him, standing next to him, trying to hide as much as possible. He felt like every eye in the bank was on him. Every whisper was about him. He felt the space slowly closing in on him. He focused on the floor tiles, trying to drown out the rest of the scene.

"Hey, are you okay?"

He was scared to open his mouth. "Yeah."

"You sure?"

"Yeah." He couldn't look at him.

"Want some water or something? I think there's a water cooler by the bathrooms."

"No."

"Okay then."

Every time Dean moved forward, he followed close by. He didn't want to get in anyone's way. He sensed more people standing behind him, the space getting even smaller. He lost track of the door, only seeing the bathrooms nearby, and the counter up front. He wanted desperately not to be there. But he didn't want to leave Dean.

"Can I help who's next?" A female's voice cut through the crowd.

Dean stepped forward, but Cas couldn't move. He wasn't ready for this. He didn't want to be here. he couldn't be here. He refused to take his eyes off the floor.

An angry voice came from behind him. "Come on, guy, move it."

He throat clenched even more. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't swallow. He couldn't see. The room was starting to spin.

Dean's voice answered back. "Back off, man."

"Some of us are in a hurry."

He couldn't be there. He was in the way. He was causing problems for everyone, especially Dean. He had to get out, but he wasn't near the door. All eyes were on him now.

"Doesn't mean you need to be a dick about it."

"What did you say?"

"You heard me."

His brain said to run. So, for once, he listened. His legs carried him to the nearest door, the bathroom. He ran to a stall and fell to his knees. Glancing at the toilet, he couldn't fight the urge to vomit anymore, his throat was too tight.

He was pretty sure he'd prefer a root canal over going back to Wal-mart, but if Cas had actually asked him to go, he could possibly find it within himself to grin and bear it one more time... though he had his doubts about that. Jess was likely lying to him in order to get him to do her work for her, but there was always a tiny little chance that she wasn't. He didn't want to disappoint anyone, just in case.

The list was the same as before, so the trip wouldn't take as long as he dreaded; he almost had the shopping down to a routine, which almost worried him. He wasn't in a major hurry this time, but he did have to get home to drop the stuff off with Cas, and then drive down to meet up with Michael and give him an estimate, so there was really no time to waste. He grabbed some microwave dinners for himself and Sammy on the way to the front of the store, placing them on the top of the already full cart.

As he scoured the checkout lanes for an opening, a flash of light caught his attention. A new lane was opening. Maybe he wouldn't hate Wal-mart so much after all. He approached the lane, and unloaded the cart onto the belt, attempting to smile at the cashier. She didn't seem too friendly - a scowl etched into her face, despite the Winchester smile. She didn't do small talk either, apparently.

He suddenly wished he had someone with him to talk to in order to ease the awkward tension and help pass the what felt like hours in line waiting for the woman to finish. She finished his order, and he swiped Cas' card.

"Can I see the card and some ID?"

He wasn't expecting that. "Excuse me?"

"ID. I need to see some ID."

"No one's ever asked me for ID before..."

She just glared at him. "Hey, when the system prompts it, I gotta ask."

"This isn't my card, though..."

"Is it a family member's?"

He looked around. "No, not exactly."

"Are you on the authorized user list?"

"I don't think so."

She narrowed her eyes at him and stuck out her hand. "Can I see the card?"

He didn't want any trouble. Last thing he needed was to be called a thief. "You know what? I'll just pay cash, how's that?"

"As long as it gets paid." She rolled her eyes. "But for future reference, if you're not an authorized user, you can't be using that card. Now, I'm a nice lady and I won't call the credit card company and report a stolen card then get security to detain you until the proper authorities arrive, so I'll just assume a friend let you borrow it. So get that cleared up before it gets you into trouble."

He was momentarily stunned. "Uh... Yeah, I will. Thanks."

She suddenly had a bright smile on her face. "Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart. Have a nice day."

He hurried out of the store, suddenly grateful to be alive for some reason. He'd have to get all that sorted out with Cas. And he would need Cas to pay him back for the cash he had to cough up to pay for his groceries. Somehow he knew this wasn't going to end well.

He pulled into his driveway and filled his arms with Cas' supplies, then waddled over to Cas' house, up onto the porch, then managed to knock with a free knuckle. The door opened on the first knock this time, and Dean was slightly surprised.

"Candygram."

"Hello Dean."

He smiled. "Wow, I think that's the first time you've ever said my name."

"I guess..."

He shifted the groceries around in his arms. "You know, these are pretty heavy..."

"Oh, sorry."

Cas grabbed the bags from Dean's hands and brought them inside, pushing the door almost closed in the process. Dean waited outside the door until Cas came back so he could explain the situation. He heard the rustling of bags stop, but Cas still hadn't come back, so he pushed the door open a little and poked his head inside.

"I need to talk to you about something important." Cas hurried back to the front door, causing him to pull his head back outside. Cas rested against the crack of the door, his face barely visible to Dean. "I had to pay for all your food out of my own pocket today."

"Why? Don't you have my card?"

"Yeah, I do... but the lady was kind of a bitch and wouldn't take it since I'm not an authorized user or something like that."

"Oh." Cas looked visibly upset. "So, what do I do?"

"Well, I kinda need the cash back... I figured I could drive you to the bank, and you clear up the confusion and add me to your account or something? And then swing by an ATM and get me a refund."

Cas looked away. "I can't do that."

"It's the only way if you want me to buy you food again. Unless you have lots of cash laying around."

"No, it's all in the bank..."

"Then get dressed and I'll take you."

"... I can't. I can't do it."

Was he being difficult on purpose? "Why not? It'll be fine. I'll drive you. I can even go inside with you if you want."

"Dean..."

"Cas...?"

"Is this absolutely necessary?"

"You could always call there, but I think you need to show some photo ID. The Wal-Mart lady wasn't very clear on any of that."

Cas paused, looking down. "I'm sorry."

He sighed. "Look, Cas, I haven't got all day. I've got things to do, so get some shoes on and let's go. I was asked to help, so I'm helping."

"Just in and out?" He sounded scared.

"Yup. Real quick. You'll be home before you know it."

"Okay I guess." Not like Cas had a choice. He would have dragged him out of the house if he had to.

"God, you look like you're going to a funeral. Lighten up a little. I don't bite."

Dean left the porch and headed for the Impala to wait for Cas to get ready. It wasn't very long before he saw Cas timidly exit his house and hurry over to the car. He started the engine and slid over and opened the passenger door for him, smiling as Cas slid inside and shut the door behind him.

"You ready?"

Cas buckled his seat belt. "Sure."

"You might need to show me where your bank is..."

"It's near the library, I think."

"Okay, we'll find it."

Dean threw the car into reverse and backed out of his driveway. He'd been to the library once only days before, so he had a general idea of where he was going. Cas was quiet the entire way, only the occasional sound of humming escaping him. Dean didn't really like silence, but he didn't want to make Cas even more uncomfortable than he already looked.

"Do you want me to turn the radio on?"

"No."

"Oh... Okay then." He must have said something to make Cas upset again.

It was a short drive, and sure enough, the bank was adjacent to the library. Dean found a parking space and put the car into park. He glanced over at Cas who was intently staring at the floor mats.

"Hey, we're here."

"Oh," Cas said flatly.

"You can run in quick."

"I guess." There was a certain hesitation to Cas' voice.

"Do you want me to go with you?"

Cas paused for a moment. "...Yeah."

"Alright." He smiled. "Let's go."

Dean climbed out of the car, but noticed Cas wasn't moving. He walked over to the passenger side and tapped on the window. Cas looked up but quickly looked away. The heavy door slowly opened and he climbed out with his head kept low. Dean followed him towards the entrance of the bank and held the door open for him like a gentleman. Cas didn't look up even once; Dean was surprised he didn't walk into a wall.

The inside of the bank was rather busy for a Thursday afternoon, but he figured a lot of people were getting their paychecks. He joined the back of the line, waiting for Cas to join his side. Cas crept forward slowly, still looking at the floor. Despite Cas keeping his distance, he glued himself to Dean's side. He really wanted to make a comment about the cheesy music playing, or the fake potted plants, or the hot teller chick, but Cas clearly didn't want to talk to him. He looked like he didn't want to talk to anyone, so Dean kept his thoughts to himself.

The line was moving forward and more people joined the line behind them, and Dean couldn't help but notice Cas looking more and more distressed. "Hey, are you okay?"

"Yeah."

He frowned. "You sure?"

"Yeah." Cas replied all too quickly.

He looked around the bank for a chair or a drinking fountain or anything that might help. "Want some water or something? I think there's a water cooler by the bathrooms."

"No."

"Okay then."

Dean decided to just leave him be. They were next in line, so it wouldn't be much longer. He could get this taken care of, drop off Cas, and be done in time to drive out and meet Michael still before it got too dark. He glanced over at Cas and noticed he was visibly even worse than before. He didn't want to worry and didn't want to push it. Cas made his point clear and it was obvious he wasn't in the mood for chit-chat.

"Can I help who's next?"

The teller was ready for them. Dean stepped forward, but Cas remained in place. He looked back at Cas, but Cas was still staring at the floor, looking more uncomfortable than ever. The people behind them in line didn't look too pleased, either.

"Come on, guy, move it."

Dean spun around to locate the source of the offending voice. His eyes locked with a taller man who was glaring at him and Cas. "Back off, man."

"Some of us are in a hurry."

He stepped towards the other man. "Doesn't mean you need to be a dick about it."

"What did you say?"

"You heard me."

He caught some movement from the corner of his eye. He turned in time to see Cas dart off towards the bathrooms.

The man laughed, "Better go catch your boyfriend."

"Hey, screw you, buddy."

Dean chased after Cas into the tiny bathroom after giving the asshole the finger. Cas was in a far stall, on his knees in front of a toilet, puking his guts out from the sound of it.

Dean approached the stall carefully, not wanting to piss Cas off even more.

"You okay, Cas?"

Dean poked his head inside the stall and saw Cas resting his head against his arm on the seat of the toilet, sitting on the floor now. He didn't look too good.

"Cas?"

"No."

Cas turned his head back to the toilet and heaved again. Dean pushed himself into the stall and started to rub Cas' back. It always worked when Sam didn't feel too well. "It'll be okay."

"Don't touch me!" Cas pulled away from him, trying to fit himself into the furthest corner of the stall, as far away as possible.

He held up his hands defensively. "I'm sorry." He was just trying to help.

He watched as Cas pulled his legs up against his chest, wrapped his arms tight around his knees, and started to cry.

"Cas, you gotta tell me what's wrong."

Cas wouldn't respond or even look at Dean.

"Come on. Say something. Please."

There was a long silence, punctuated by an occasional sob and sniffle. Eventually, he heard the timid voice. "I need help."

"I'm here. I can help if you let me. Just tell me what you need."

"I need help. I'm not normal. I'm broken."

Cas started crying harder but Dean couldn't do anything about it. He couldn't risk touching him for fear of setting him off again.

He stood in the opening of the stall and looked down at the crying man. "We'll get you help, I promise."

A/N: This fic is complete, however a follow-up story is in the works, so don't fear. However, I don't have an ETA on when it will be finished.