Chapter 4

Tim was silent, brow furrowed. He wanted to disagree, point out the flaws in that logic, every last bit of it. Except for the parts he realized were entirely valid for someone in Tony's shoes. He also began to feel humbled as he realized what this conversation was skirting around, what truly decent, honorable people rarely verbalized. A sincere desire to be useful in the service of Good, to whatever extremes that may require at any given time. This was Tony's core, this was his solid rock interior that Abby went on about. It had been this way well before he caught the plague. Maybe it was a mistake to poke holes in that without some serious thought… especially after a day like today.

And even more than the content of DiNozzo's apparent philosophy, Tim was shocked by the voluntary nature of Tony's words about something so terribly personal. Their own little intimate moment. And then he realized he shouldn't be shocked, Tony had no doubt chosen to talk about this for some reason. Every so often over the years, Tony dropped his deeply annoying ways of triviality and just talked about actual important things. Sometimes it was just when the senior agent was just too tired or distracted to keep up his usual defenses. But quite often, it involved something his Probie needed to understand to become better at his job, possibly better in his life. Teaching moments, luckily imparted without arrogance or condescension… although it had taken Tim a long time to realize that as compared to the usual DiNozzo impression of arrogance and condescension. Tim's knee-jerk reaction to almost anything vaguely like the voice of experience from Tony years ago was shameful to the younger man when he had finally realized what he was doing. His insecurity about his lack of law enforcement experience, his lack of street smarts, had been overwhelming at times. Tim thought he was doing better about that the last couple of years.

So what did Tony want him to take away from this conversation? Everyone on the team would give their lives if necessary, Tim was sure Tony felt that included his former Probie. The younger man knew he hadn't been tested as often as the other members of the team, but with Tony's "heart of a lion" description while under truth serum, Tim knew Tony didn't think he was shy in valor. So was the point just to open up more to his teammates? There was that bucket list item of Tony's…

Tim decided to try and lighten things back up, to let Tony know he understood his explanation, and would accept it without argument… for now at least. But he was still curious what else his SFA might be trying to tell him.

Well, one thing he had learned from the DiNozzo Secondary Standard Method of information gathering (the first purely involved charisma) was the Bear Maneuver; actually several different strategies accomplishing the same goal. It was also used, mostly by Tony, in Gibbs-diffusion when necessary. Sometimes you have to poke the bear…

Grinning with a head tilt to broadcast to the older man that he was teasing, "…-er. Get old-er you mean. As if you don't already have a foot in the door of decrepit Tony."

Rolling his eyes with his own grin, Tony shook his head and told the ceiling, "Karma. Wicked, mean karma getting me back for… well pretty much my entire life of teasing old people. Or just teasing you. Or both. Yeesh."

He shuddered theatrically before continuing, "The thing is, the actual incident this morning, the way I choose to take Tauriq on a little ride with me? Don't want you thinking that's something you're ever expected to do in a similar situation. My worldview aside, we all as agents have to go with what we're most confident will work for us. You have methods and abilities that work great for you. But that kind of thing this morning would not work for you, you know that, right?"

"Well… you're right… but shouldn't it eventually? I might grow into that kind of… whammy thing… the same as I have the other parts of being a good field agent." Tim sounded a little skeptical himself.

"Not gonna say it's impossible Tim, am gonna say it's improbable. Wish I didn't have to say this, because don't get me wrong - you are very weird Elf Lord, but you're just not weird enough… in here." Pointing to his head, Tony continued. "The way I picture it, you have to firmly scoop up your own mental instabilities with both hands and pour them straight into the other guy's head. And you my dear Timmy, are just too darn mentally stable for that."

Tony shook his head while affecting a faux-sympathetic look. "I'm sure your parents at least are very proud, Tim."

Tim rolled his eyes, although glad his curiosity had been satisfied, and retorted, "So you're saying you make your mental instability work for you?"

"Yep, Probie. Me and Tauriq would have to agree with you." Tony replied smugly, but laughing as he did, especially as Gibbs rounded the corner.

"So glad something's working around here, you both done with your reports?"

"Boss! Just reviewing Ziva's, mine and McSpeedy's incident reports are on your desk, the CompBallist is filed, and McGee was just finishing…"

"Coordinating different sections of the flash drive contents for different agencies to follow up on Boss, almost done."

They worked in silence, the floor mostly empty that night, until Tim finished his work and gathered his things to leave. He said goodnight to Gibbs, then stopped in front of Tony's desk. "Let's see if you know this one." He held a finger up, "To be continued…" He raised his eyebrows, knowing the quote was unlikely to stump his friend… his deeply annoying older brother.

Befuddled for only a second, Tony's voice rose as he snapped his fingers, "Oh, oh! Ah... Vincent to Jules in the diner, Pulp Fiction!"

He smiled, but then returned to confusion, "Was just thinking of that film today. Continuing?"

"Don't think I'm letting it go forever. Rule #8 Tony, sounds like you're assuming to me."

"Oh, Rule #11 McPollyAnna, drop it already."

Shaking his head while walking to the elevator, Tim called, "DiNozzo Rule #1 Tony. Goodnight!"

Huffing out a breath, Tony glanced over to Gibbs. "He's getting better at getting the last word. You know we've created a monster, right Boss?"

A grunt answered him. "I like DiNozzo's Rule #1. Sounds like he had cause to think you might be in trouble."

"Whoa Boss, don't you pile on too." Pointing a finger at the man walking closer and pulling over McGee's chair to sit comfortably next his SFA's desk, Tony continued, "There's no trouble here, I'm trouble-free! I'm the calorie-free cola of very special agents Boss."

"I just read the reports DiNozzo… I read between the lines. Interrogated Jacobs and the bastard you had to get cozy with. Hennesy was pretty easy to push once I mentioned I could get you to come talk to him again. Started going on about his Nana with the Sight, and how you had the 'deadlight' in your eyes..."

Tony pretended to preen, "That scum says the sweetest things."

"And he went on about being alive in five seconds and five weeks..."

Tony sighed quietly and found Gibbs' trouser-leg texture fascinating.

"...and I heard everything after 'smooth talking silver devil'?" Eyebrows raised, Gibbs tried not to laugh as his suddenly startled SFA looked him in the eyes.

"Oh. Ahh…" Tony rapidly tried to think what was said and if he was in some sort of trouble. "You know that's a total compliment, right Boss?" His big smile tried to distract the older man, "I've seen you turn on the charm Gibbs, that smile ought to be registered as a…"

"Tony."

Just one word turned the verbal faucet off in the younger man. A good sign to Gibbs, it wouldn't take long to get Tony plain speaking with him. Then had gotten better at doing this without the benefit of a basement or bourbon over the years. Although, considering the situation, a pull from his flask was sounding mighty appealing at the moment.

Leaning back with laced fingers resting on his waist and crossing a leg, Gibbs continued, "I know that kind of life or death moment. And I know you. How'd you get yourself settled Tony? Ducky?"

Tony knew from long experience when Gibbs was like this just to give him what he wanted, it was easier on both of them. "Sort of. Really helps to see a corpse. Ducky lets me… sounds weird... guess because it is weird... but just touching a cold dead ankle is like the arrestor wire on an aircraft carrier, you know? Everything just stops. You can't be more in the present moment all the sudden."

"Yeah, can see that. Kick you out of that headspace?"

"Pretty much. Pretty much. Things just a little glowy still. Little gleaming and luminous around the edges every once in a while." He closed eyes, shaking his head at himself. "Nothing twelve hours of sleep won't finish off."

Nodding slightly, Gibbs said, "Come on over tonight." Holding up a hand to Tony's automatic objection, "I know you're ok. This isn't your first rodeo. But that type of… connection with somebody else makes being alone later… tough. You know it."

Tony did know it. Especially considering he was almost missing the physicality of the morning encounter, and having to cut that line of thinking off with the feel of a corpse under his hand. Crashing at Gibbs' tonight was sounding pretty good actually.

"Yeah… yeah. Thanks." He took a tired breath, "Thought you might take a swing at lecturing me like Tim's going to try and do."

"Nah. Not exactly a big surprise to you we're alike in a lot of ways. That's one. Know you're not taking risks you shouldn't be, not trying to take short cuts to the finish line. That matters."

Gibbs was thoughtful for a moment, then continued. "Hated Mike getting killed just because I called him for help. But a fight against a serial murderer… getting the guy we hadn't been able to touch wounded at least? It's the way he'd have preferred going out. Compared to dying in a bed of lung cancer. He'd have wasted a bullet on himself before that, and none of us want to go that way."

Tony respected that Gibbs wanted to go out the same way as himself… but he hated thinking of a future without Gibbs in it.

"Yeah." Tony was silent for a moment, and had to swallow before continuing.

"Thing is Boss... really appreciate it if you didn't kick off anytime soon." He couldn't quite make eye contact.

Gibbs stood up while reaching over to grip Tony's shoulder hard, "Likewise Tony, likewise. Come on, let's head out. You're making pancakes in the morning."

"Ah, Boss, remember that didn't go so well last time." Tony huffed out a grateful laugh as he stood.

"Well, hope springs eternal DiNozzo." He stopped and looked Tony in the eyes for a moment, saying more than his words. "Rule #8 applies across the board Tony, never forget that. Let's go."

"Me and chocolate chips are on your six Boss."

"See, I think the chips are why they burned last time…"

The squabbling continued as the elevator doors closed. "Don't blame the chocolate Boss, never blame the chocolate… that ought to be a rule…"

Fin

Thanks to everyone for reading!

Rule reminders:
Rule #8: Never assume/take anything for granted.
Rule #11: When the job is done, walk away.
DiNozzo Rule #1: Don't sit on the sidelines while your people are in trouble.