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Dye the BLACK

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Summary: Dying should have led my soul to Heaven; dying should have led my soul to peace. Instead... dying led me to death.

Rating: T for violence, strong language, and some adult content.

Disclaimer: BLEACH belongs to Tite-sensei, Akasuki belonged to Reige, this story is adopted by me.

A/N: This fanfic was formally known as "I DYED", but was erased for reasons only known by the previous author. I was given permission to adopt the story, and I plan to do this in ways I would like. I also want to expand some things that weren't properly done from the last, but I don't blame the former author for that, I just thought the whole thing was kind of rushed through. This will be rushed, as well, but it will fill in some plot holes (I hope) so that way no one will look back and wonder. Anyway, I hope you guys will like this. Enjoy and remember to leave a review!

If you love someone, then tell them because
Hearts are often broken by words left unspoken
~ Anonymous

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It was the moments from before that everything mattered. I could only stare into the big, blue sky endlessly as everything began to grow quiet and still. All the excitement and noise fading slowly into a dying mute. I was succumbing into the deep never ending sleep that had been known to humanity since the beginning, and like everyone, including myself, have heard: it was an infamous event that occurred without warning or knowledge; it just happened. And that was what living was all about...

A football nearly slammed into the side of my head.

Startled, I whipped my arm and pointed at the perpetrator, "WATCH IT, YOU IDIOT!"

Denny only winced at the shrill sound of my voice, an invisible tail tucked between his legs as he treaded carefully over to claim back his damned football. Behind him, big Derk was (not) having a hard time stiffing his amusement and it earned him a sharp look from his girlfriend. Brooke and Wendy thankfully had the decency to not find the whole thing funny and refocused their attention to the text books in their hands.

"Want me to get him for you, Su?"

Oh~

Brian, his handsome face set in a mock determined look, stared up at me from where he was lying on the grass near me. I quickly looked away so that he wouldn't see the flushed look on my face. Feigning a thinking pose as I stared at the horror-stricken Denny, I decided that sentencing the pesky brunet would be too much of a hassle, that, and we had to do the work of trying to hide Denny's body somewhere.

"He lives." I said, and over yonder, Denny released a sigh of relief. "For now."

I was a cruel mistress. Yes, I was.

A chuckle escaped from the bigger boy beside me before he allowed himself to lie back down and the grass and resume his nap. My cinammon-colored hues couldn't help but soften when I gazed down at the older teen, butterflies in my stomach and my heart pounding like a drum. This sweet, kind, rowdy, boyish, and fun-loving guy was just too much for me... That girl he was currently dating should feel lucky to have a man like Brian for herself.

I knew I would.

My hands clenched the edges of the text book for a brief second before relinquishing the hold.

I forced my eyes away from him, only to blush when Brook and Wendy were giving me those twin sly looks of their own. I shake off their staring and resumed where we left off on the sentence before my head was nearly flattened by a football.

After the girls and I finished our homework assignment, all of us determined we would be prepared for the work we would give to our teacher, we lounged on the grass and let the topics fly over our heads.

"Practice kinda sucked today." came Derk's comment as he sat to Wendy, giving the blond girl a quick kiss on her rosy cheek.

She returned the sentiment by twining her fingers through his shaggy blond hair. She gave the football player a playful pouty face while she massaged his scalp. "Why is that, babe?"

"Steve McCoy," was Denny's answer.

Everyone knew, or at least heard of, Steve McCoy. He was a good-looking guy with nice, dark hair and beautiful blue eyes. Unfortunately, while he was a great catch, his attitude was a total turn-off to most of the girl population. Every girl who had went with McCoy on one date said the same exact thing: he was controlling, he was easily angered, and he was violent every now and then. But there was others who said he was just a trouble kid, that McCoy had it rough since he was little...

And then there were the rumors.

"They say McCoy's mom goes behind her husband's back, and that—" Brooke paused, an unsure look on her face while everyone leaned in, curious to hear more about what circled in the McCoy household.

It was a wrong thing to do, I knew that since my mom and step-dad first taught me this, but I was human; human beings are the most curious creatures in the entire world, and they would pursue the answers despite the destructive consequences ahead.

"What do they say, Brooke?"

Whatever it was, it had to be something big if it made the red-head feel reluctant to say it out in the open. Knowing she was backed into a corner and her friends would continue to pester her until she answered, Brooke finally relented.

"They say... They say the dad, he, uh..." Brooke made these gestures with her hands, and slowly, it dawned to everyone what she was trying to say.

"Oh," was my reply.

The thought, the very idea, the horrific implication was made plain clear to us all. I know it happened all the time, all over the world, just somewhere in the distance that was not my hometown... but having it happen this close to me, it was an overwhelming feeling to have. I didn't know what to say, but I felt nothing but raw disgust and anger. I was angry because McCoy was just a kid around our age group, he should have been having fun in high school and getting all the girls while trying to pass his quizzes.

Instead, he was hurt, abused, and... and... God, I couldn't even say it. It was like actually accepting that it was actually happening. I prayed that this was just a rumor, I hoped to God that the idiot who spread these were just that: idiotic morons who got the whole truth wrong.

"They say it's been happening since the 4th grade." Brooke murmured in the silence, making the feeling within us all even more worse.

"Jesus...!" Denny hissed under his breath. "Oh, that's fucked up..."

I couldn't take anymore of this conversation. "I gotta, I gotta go home."

"Su!" my girl friends called after me, but I was already on my feet with my bag hanging off my shoulder and walking straight out of the park.

Today, what had seemed like a good day, was just terrible.

"Su!" I heard Brian call after me. "Do you need a walk home?"

"Need a walk home?" Brian offered while handing over my back pack.

"It's okay. I'm good, I'll be okay. Thanks anyway!"

I didn't even bother to look back to give him my answer, I simply continued to walk away without a proper goodbye to my friends. Somewhere deep down I was disappointed in myself for not accepting Brian's offer to walk me back home... but my mind was elsewhere.

Hopefully tomorrow would be better than today.

~.::.~.::.~.::.~

Babysitting wasn't my thing. It especially was becoming a very detested job when I had to be the one to take care of my obnoxious little five-year-old brother. The little punk was so stubborn to stay awake past his bed time simply because there was his favorite night time channels broadcasting at the late hour.

"Ben!" I snapped at the toddler when he was once again on the couch, watching a colorfully, animated show, when he should have been tucked in bed. "No more violent cartoons! It's nine o'clock! Now, go to bed!"

"No!" came his rebellious reply.

'I know for a damn well fact that he should not be acting like this until he hits puberty! I will not deal with an early bloomer IN THIS HOUSE!' I sneered down at the boy on the couch.

Nope. I wasn't taking anymore crap from the little adorable shit that was trying to glare at me when it actually made his cuteness reach new heights. Mom and Greg trusted me to do my job, and I wasn't going to let my little half-brother ruin their trust in me because he wanted to watch those violent cartoons.

"Ben, go to be bed... or I'll call The Boogeyman."

There was a flash of fear, but the sucker put on a brave front.

"... No!"

He had guts, I'll give him that.

"You asked for it, squirt." I muttered darkly before disappearing to bring out my secret weapon against stubborn toddlers.

Once inside my room I head straight for the closet. I flicked the closet light on and I pushed away my wardrobe to reveal what I've been seeking: my Halloween costume. I pulled it off the racked and immediately started to get dressed, and once that was done, I found my plastic knife hidden somewhere above the high rack of the closet. Dressed in a Scream outfit with a bloody Ghostface while armed with a plastic knife, I did a quick check over myself. Satisfied that nothing was out of place, I finally headed out of the room with only one goal in my mind.

Get Ben to bed.

In years to come if Ben was older and still afraid of my costume, I was going to be found guilty for traumatizing my poor baby brother, but right now, I had to make some sacrifices for the greater good of this household.

"OooOoooh~"I loudly announced my presence as I peeked behind the corner to see Ben still in the living room... and hiding (failing) behind the couch with wide, frightened eyes. "OOooooooOOOOooooH~!"

"Suki!" Ben cried out, huddling onto the couch.

"I gonna get you~ Benny~!" I hissed at the boy. "You didn't listen to your sister, now I'm going to get you~!"

"No, no, no!" Ben was in hysterics now, crying out my name.

"Will you go to bed~?" I asked him while making a nerve-wracking twist with my neck. "Go to bed and I will go away~ Far away~!"

"I'll go! I'll go!" he hastily agreed, and I knew he played right into my hands.

"Go to bed, Benny~!" I hissed loudly once more and the little boy shuffled off the couch and quickly to his bed while crying his eyes out.

I felt bad about bringing him to tears, but I did what I had to do.

I stood there for a few minutes longer, making sure that the little squirt didn't plan on trying my patience again. Seeing that he stayed in his room, I dropped the gig and switched the television screen off. I headed straight for my room while removing my Halloween duds, intent on reviewing my notes before turning in myself for the night.

Once in bed and the whole Boogeyman scene played in my mind, my thoughts wandered to Ben's tears... and it made me think about Steve McCoy. The tiny guilt in me that somewhat had fun with scaring Ben to his racecar bed came back tenfold. Was I abusing Ben in some way? Would he grow up to be afraid because of what happened to him now?

With my troubled mind, I kept awake all through the night with thoughts filled of worry. I was only fourteen years old, I should be worrying about homework and my love life... but why couldn't I erase the unease that came over me when I heard McCoy's name?

~.::.~.::.~.::.~

"Jenna's mad at me again. Told me off because I forgot to bring her Gucchi shoes back to her house from mine." Brian complained as he tossed his football repeatedly in the air from his place on the desk. I told her I'd get it back later, but she keeps nagging at me."

"Brian, what did you ever see in her?" Wendy asked with a deadpan look on her face.

" 'Oh, my God! Those shoes don't match with her scarf! Ugh, Adrianna's totally going behind Drake's back with Thomas! Argh! Where are my freaking Gucchi bags? I payed $400 on those bags!' " Brooke made a perfect mimic of Jenna, making everyone laugh.

"It's stupid how even years later the school still has the stereotypical stuck-up preps! God, why do they even exist?!" I groaned in despair while slamming my head to my desk.

"Hey, geek is actually becoming the new cool!" some guy in the class said, and we all paused at that.

"That's actually a good point." Derk agreed after a pregnant long while.

"You could do better than her." Wendy said to Brian, giving him a long and meaningful look.

Brian stared down at his desk, seeming to find it more interesting than staring at the girl in front of him. I bit my bottom lip as my stomach flopped down, the familiar and unwelcome feeling of despair took tight hold onto me. Whomever Brian had his hands on was one lucky girl, I thought bitterly. I wasn't anything or anyone special. I was just that 1% Japanese-American girl in a school of 99% Caucasians. I was that girl who wasn't as beautiful as Wendy, Brooke, or Jenna... or wasn't as interesting as Brian, Derk, and Denny. I was just a plain fish in the big, blue sea.

But God, what I would give to be someone or even something interesting!

I was happy though. Brian reached out to me and made me his friend, and he was everything a person would want in a great friend. I should be happy if that was the only thing I could have from this boy sitting next to me.

The classroom seemed empty to me as my mind pondered on about my relationship with the big brunet next to me. Today, there was to be a substitute teacher, but the teacher must have forgotten to leave a note or pass an e-mail because the classroom was without an adult supervision... not that anyone was complaining.

Brian finally looked up to Wendy, his mouth opened to—

BANG!

No one moved. Anybody was had been talking, texting, horsing around on the desks, or even sleeping, they all went deathly silent from the foreign sound that echoed in the halls from outside the classroom. We were all like deers, all of us with our eyes wide open and our ears straining for the sound...

BANG! BANG!

The reaction was instant; everyone suddenly dropped from their desks and onto the floor with cries of shock and fear. It was real, uncut fear pumping through us like a drug being sticked through us via needle.

"Tell me that wasn't a gun!" I heard Denny please with growing hysterics. "Please tell me that wasn't a fucking gun!"

"Shut the fuck up, Den!" Derk growled as he dragged the panicking brunet down under with the rest of us before he did something stupid.

"Somebody, shut the lights off!"

"Like that'll do any good!"

"Call the cops! Now!" Brian ordered vehemently.

No had to be told twice when practically everyone with a phone pulled them out and started dialing 9-1-1. Meanwhile, I suddenly remembered watching documentaries from the television. Survivors who had been in these situations, I remembered them repeating the same thing over and over: one minute everything is normal, and the next minute you're trying to get out alive.

BANG!

I ducked my head and tried to make myself into a ball, but it did not help soften the blow that there was a shooter outside our classroom door. And the scary part was that every shot fired sounded a lot closer than before. I could hear people around us wailing and letting out pitiful cries, the sound of defeat and looming death engulfing the entire classroom. I flinched when I felt a bigger body tuck my tiny, shaking frame closer to them, and I looked up to see Brian. The older boy was just as terrified as I was, but he put on a brave face as he held me to his side very tightly.

"Brian..." I whimpered out a sob as I ducked my head under his chin. "I, I..."

"Shh, shhshh! I'm not gonna let you die." Brian whispered desperately against my hair as he held me. "I swear to God, I'm not gonna let you die, Su."

BANG!

"Oh, God!" Brooke whimpered and held a shaking Denny to her, trying to keep the teen from running out of the class to risk getting shot dead. "I wanna go home, I wanna go home, I wanna go home..."

Her mantra continued on like broken record, and some part of me was worried that something was crumbling around the red-head's sanity. She was falling apart like breaking glass, and if we ever made it out alive... I wasn't sure we would be able to pick up the pieces.

"Where are the fucking cops?!" Brian demanded with growing impatience.

"They're coming!" one of the students replied, a not of relief on his face. "They're on their way, ASAP!"

The relief was soon broken when two shots were fired, making everyone duck down and give a cry of fear.

"We have to get outta here!" Denny exclaimed as he looked at his friends and the rest of his classmates that stared at him, shocked that he would even propose such an idea. "There's no way out here, but I think we can make it for the windows outside the class!"

"You THINK?!" one student cried with outrage. "Yeah! That's a fan-fucking-tastic plan alright! You make a run for it while the rest of us get to have bullet holes littered all over our bodies!"

"It's not gonna work, you idiot!" another added.

"I'm not going out there!"

I watched with morbid awe as everyone turned against each other, everyone wanting to save their own skins by sacrificing others while they make a break for it. I numbly raised my hands to hold them over my ears, trying to block out the sounds of people's voices mixing together as they fought one another.

"Do you wanna die?!" Denny asked, glaring at everyone. "Do you really want to stay inside this place and wait for this guy to come in and shoot us down?!"

"No one wants to die, you fucking moron!" Brian growled venomously at the other boy.

"Then let's get out of here. NOW!"

There was a long moment of debating silence, everyone murmuring to themselves and weight the cons and pros of taking the risk. There decision was made when another shot was fired. Brian stared hard at Denny before his eyes trailed down to land on me, still shaking and holding hands over my ears. One look from me and Brian conceded to the idea.

"Lets go."

Brian was the first one out the door after leaving instructions for everyone to wait to so that he would see if the coast was clear. After a moment of suspenseful silence, he returned and gestured for everyone to come out and begin our trek towards the nearest windows to make our escape. The hallways were silent and we all noticed the doors were shut and the insides of the rooms dark.

One student wanted to see if they could get other students to join them, but it was a futile plan. No one would answer the door or unlock it, and it was a clear idea that the students and teachers inside were thinking there was shooter just standing behind their door. It was a sick and ugly feeling when we abandoned the doors, leaving everyone else to a worst fate while we braved the outside halls to find escape.

BANG!

Everyone slammed themselves against the hallway walls with a startled gasp, I had shut my eyes and clung to Brian's frame tightly. After awhile, I opened them and Brian shuffled forward to check the corner of the hallway—

"AAAAHHH!"

A scream tore out and it made everyone else join in and drop to the floor in panic or bolt backwards. Brian suddenly turned towards the rest of his followed and waved his arms wildly.

"SSHH! Shut the fuck up!" Brian hissed and we all went quiet, our hearts pounding and our eyes wide with terror.

There was another group of students that were also trying to escape. And amongst them was Jenna, Brian's current girlfriend and Queen Bee of the school. I never liked Jenna, in fact, not a lot of people who didn't come up to her perfectionist standards didn't like her; she was rude, condescending, and borderline childish, and she always went out of her way to pull everyone she though below her down. She once made two or three girls transfer schools because of the harassment she caused, and she got away with it, too.

I was one of the many victims of her abuse. Brian would invite the girl over to sit with us, who also invited her posse to join her when there was lunch time. She didn't mind Derk, Denny, and Wendy's company much, but she sneered at me and Brooke. The red-head would always spout nasty things when Jenna would ask (more like demand) that Brooke and I leave the table because we apparently didn't meet up to her standards and expectations.

Lately though, Jenna was dragging Brian away from us to eat with her and her friends, and it was obvious she was trying to make him cut ties with his old friends.

"Oh, God, Brian!" the blond girl jumped to embrace the taller brunet. I found myself pushed aside when she made her way towards him, and I couldn't stop myself from feeling angry and disappointed.

Now was not the time to feel petty and jealous. We all had to get out now before we meet with someone who wasn't a student that was trying to escape.

"Look! The windows!" someone pointed out and ran for it, the rest of us followed.

The school building was three stories high, and we were on the third story building. We could see below students escaping through the windows in the first floor, all of them fleeing in fear towards safety. Another shot went off and everyone whirled around to stare at all the directions of the hallways.

"Oh fuck, that sounded way too close..."

"He's here, then." a girl said, her voice reaching new heights of terror. "He's on our floor!"

"What we do now?! The stairs are on the other side of the hall!"

"This was Denny's fucking idea!"

Before mutiny could be committed, someone pressed themselves against the window and pointed outside, making everyone turn to see what he was making a fuss about.

"H-hey! There's a water drain pipe here. It looks bolted pretty good." the student pointed out when he spotted the object of a potential escape route.

"Okay, listen up everybody!" Brian's voice commanded as he opened the windows and waved at everyone to come closer. "Here's what we're gonna do..."

Brave, brave Brian Yate helped the students out the window, explaining to them how they could carefully grip the water drain pipe and make their way down. One-by-one, with much haste, everyone climbed down to safety before making a run for it. I stayed behind to help, refusing to leave Brian while Jenna and our friends went down and went to find cover and help. In the distance, we could hear the sound of sirens coming closer to the school.

"Thank God..." the last person said as they climbed down, leaving me and Brian behind.

"C'mon Su, let's get you down." Brian said as he offered me a hand.

"Yeah," I whispered.

I reached for his open, waiting had but noticed the older teen stiffen. A plain, horror-stricken face stretched across his features, and I could not stop myself from turning around to face the source of his fear. Whatever hope I had in me quickly escaped and threw itself out the window when I found myself staring at the end of a gun barrel pointed directly at us.

There stood a boy, not as tall as Brian, but still big enough to be intimidating even without the weapons. He was dressed in black from the T-shirt to the boots, and he was armed with two automatic firearms. His face, however, was quite bare for all to see who had shot the students and teachers dead.

Steve McCoy, nineteen years old, classmate from my sixth period Biology class and a fellow football player in Brian's team.

McCoy looked... sad, and he looked like he would drop dead from exhaustion.

I nearly jumped when a hand rested against my shoulder, a hand that wanted to give me what little security it could offer in the face of a great danger. Brian was terrified, I knew because I felt it pumping in my blood and pounding inside my heart, but he still was conscious enough to reach out for me.

"Hey, Brian." McCoy greeted the brunet so casually, his voice even spoke of tiredness.

I heard Brian swallow thickly from behind me. "Steve..."

"That's a clever idea," McCoy complimented him as he gestured one of his guns towards the window. "Sneaking around the hallways to find the windows. 'Course, there's the fact that you're on the third fucking floor of the building!"

He laughed like he had been told the biggest, funniest joke he ever heard in his entire life. Watching him made the entire situation so surreal, it made me wonder just how broken he was on the inside to make him act like it was just another day in school. All in all, it was fucking terrifying.

"Stop it!" Brian shouted at him.

McCoy soon sobered up from the laugh, staring at Brian. "Stop what, man...?"

"You killed people, Steve!" Brian snarled at him as he pulled me closer to his side. "You fucking went around and shot people, and you think this is fucking funny?!"

The other boy looked down at the two guns in his hands, as if he suddenly realized there was two weapons in his grasp.

"You don't know, Brian..." he murmured.

"The cops are here, man! They're here because of what you did, and they're going to get you for this!" Brian went, and I looked over my shoulder to see many cop cars and ambulances piled up on the school street.

A small squadron then headed inside the building.

'He's buying us some time.' I realized. 'He's distracting him so that the cops will get to McCoy first!'

"You don't know, Brian!" Steve snapped, his face and voice full and anguish and tears. "You don't FUCKING KNOW!"

"You should have said something!" Brian went on, becoming tired from all the emotional stress and fear piling up on him. "You should have told somebody that you needed help! Goddammit, Steve, we could've helped you!"

"You don't know my dad," the boy sobbed, the guns in his hands wavering and my chest tightened with hope. "You don't know what he does...!"

Was Brian getting to McCoy?

"You're right, man... I've got no idea what's been happening to you. Steve, this all needs to stop. Don't turn this against everyone else, they've got nothing to do with what happened!"

McCoy grew silent, his once shuddering shoulders and sobbing coming down.

"We can help," Brian coaxed the troubled boy, his voice now quiet and calm. "We can bring that fucker down and your dad'll get what he deserved... Just, just stop this right now. Please."

Steve looked from when he had bowed his head, his eyes glittering from the tears that stained down his red cheeks. Brian and I stood beside one another, watching with bated breath as the gunman stared at us with uncertainty.

"Brian," the boy called my friend's name. "I'm sorry."

I moved before I even realized what just happened/

"NO!"

BANG!

I was falling. I watched the building become far away the more I fell until I landed hard against the surface of the earth below me. There was a sudden light dizziness surrounding my vision that gradually grew brighter, the noise was muffled and... everything looked wrong. I found myself staring at wide, brown orbs.

Brian. Brian was on top of me, and his mouth was wide open with a silent scream.

I felt weightless, and I knew that there was something me and Brian should have been doing... but I couldn't remember what. Drool was piling up in my mouth, I tried to swallow it but the taste was horrible. It tasted like I stuffed hundreds of liquified pennies and stuffed it down my throat. Brian was still silently screaming, and I stared at him with wonder.

Why was he doing that? Just say something, I wanted to tell him. Yet again, for some unexplainable reason, I couldn't tell him that myself.

I couldn't move, and I couldn't think straight at all. It was like someone just used and sledge hammer and broke my mind into thousands of shattered pieces that needed time to build itself back together again.

I noticed how scared Brian was, with the tears dribbling down from his sweet eyes. I wanted to reach up and wipe them away, whisper to him that he shouldn't cry because then I would cry, too.

He was talking to me, I saw. His lips moving rapidly, his hands cradling around my head, but he didn't move me. He looked afraid, like his very touch would hurt me.

I looked past him and towards the building. And then I remembered.

I took a bullet for Brian, the force of the shot throwing me back and forcing the both of us out the window. I maneuvered us in mid-air so that I would be the one to cushion the fall. I was a broken, bloody, ugly mess before his eyes, and I began to see the white overflowing my vision.

It was the moments from before that everything mattered. I could only stare into the big, blue sky endlessly as everything began to grow quiet and still. All the excitement and noise fading slowly into a dying mute. I was succumbing into the deep never ending sleep that had been known to humanity since the beginning, and like everyone, including myself, have heard: it was an infamous event that occurred without warning or knowledge; it just happened. And that was what living was all about...

My eyelids grew to heavy for me to hold them open, and I couldn't fight against the tiredness that called for me. The last thing I felt were desperate hands cupping my cheeks, warm droplets landing on my nose and bleeding lips, the warmth comforting me while everything in me was cold. No matter how badly I wanted to open my eyes and tell Brian I was alright and that I wasn't going anywhere without him, I knew it would be the biggest lie I ever told him. I hated lying to him.

I gave a last prayer to all my family and friends to be alright, I prayed that there were people that were lucky who survived this horrific morning, and I prayed that McCoy would find hope against all the odds against him.

If I had any strength left in me, I would have liked to have told Brian Yate that I loved him.

And then, I died.

~.::.~.::.~.::.~

Akasuki Kane

Great friend, beloved daughter

1998 - 2012