I possess neither Harry Potter nor Doctor Who. I do not try to make money by writing this story.

"It has long been speculated of how exactly Luna Lovegood came by the idea.

It is certain that it came initially from the muggle world. Some accuse the muggleborn or half-blood student body of Hogwarts of having introduced Luna Lovegood to the concept: in particular, Colin Creevey, Seamus Finnegan and even Harry Potter himself. Other authors incriminate the not so secret stash of fictional books and magazines Hermione Granger had hidden in the last drawer of her bedside table; lent to Luna Lovegood by Ginevra Weasley, sister of Ronald Weasley."

A true History of Wizard Transport, by Aeolius Volauvent

Neville Longbottom was the first one inducted.

As any true Ravenclaw, Luna Lovegood had already made several in-depth and comparative researches in the type of wood best suited for her project. However, like any other Hogwarts recent alumni, she knew that the best available botanist to select a potent specimen would be Neville Longbottom. The former Gryffindor had already demonstrated his genius in all things connected to magical plants through five years of potions accidents. In truth, the force of the explosions he managed to engineer, from seemingly harmless ingredients, had always been directly proportional to the magical quality of said ingredients: surprising, impressive, and very destructive. Thus, recruiting Neville Longbottom could only be the first step of the process.

She apparated to the site of the newly rebuilt Longbottom Manor on a sunny Sunday to ask him for help. Augusta Longbottom didn't even have to greet the young witch or comment on her renowned radish earrings. Luna's signature was keyed into the wards. She took advantage of it to immediately go to the greenhouse sitting behind the Manor, all while thanking the newly employed house-elf who was trying to direct her to the mistress of the house.

Raising his head after having finished transplanting his mourning marigolds, Neville found himself nose to hair with a silently stood Luna, looking intently at his Adam's apple. He didn't know what to expect. The following conversation didn't help.

"I'm happy to see that the last deepening dippers have left," was Luna's only greeting.

"Er, thank you, Luna." Like any of her friends, Neville had stopped long ago trying to interpret her cryptic commentaries. It was easier to wait, either for her to explain or for some miraculous inspiration to give answers.

She blinked, "Do you know where I could find a sturdy but whimsical hazel?"

"A hazel tree?" checked Neville after a pause.

"Of course, I can't build a box with a hazel boy. It wouldn't be proper." She blinked again.

"You should find one in the nearest forest, or the nearest wild hedge. I know there is one at the edge of the property." He pointed to the left of the greenhouse.

"Perfect." She caught his arm, and he barely had time to put his gloves on a nearby desk before she dragged him outside.

"On the left, Luna." She turned. "No, the other left."

And thus Neville was recruited.

The next one to be infected by this insanity was Ginevra Weasley. She had learnt in a conversation between her mother and her father, who had heard from Amos Diggory, who was told by his wife, who had fortuitously met Xenophilius Lovegood, that Augusta Longbottom had complained of Luna kidnapping Neville in order to build some kind of wooden magical box. Ginny decided it was time to go and see how her friend was doing.

She caught sight of the construction from the road and at first she thought that the Lovegood family had built a new garden shed, or maybe an outdoor toilet. Even a careful examination at a respectful six foot distance – a safety precaution painfully assimilated through her growing years with George and Fred – couldn't wield any indication to the purpose of the strange object. She then resigned herself to interrupt Luna, who was energetically waving her wand while muttering incantations and hopping in a circle around the box. However, she didn't have to find a politically correct way to ask "What the hell is it?", since Luna stopped on one foot and gazed at her.

"Hello Ginny, did you come to participate in my new project?"

"Hey. Is this big thing a part of it?" Ginny asked without a pause.

"Of course, you can't travel without a good broom!" Luna punctuated her axiom with an emphatic wave of her wand.

Ginny leaned around her to look at the subject of their discussion. "That thing doesn't look like a broom."

"It shouldn't, it is supposed to look like a box," explained Luna patiently.

Ginny paused. "But we can still use it to travel? Like a broom?" Luna nodded. "Do we have to climb on it and take hold of the strange glass dome?" She tried to picture herself on it.

Luna looked at her curiously. "Well, you can, but inside is much more comfortable. Do you want to take a tour?"

Ginny smiled. "Take a tour? I don't want to offend you, but it shouldn't take so much..."

Luna opened the door and Ginny trailed off. She could see a whole room inside, at least twenty times bigger than the exterior of the box, with blue walls and a glass-like floor. She leaned closer. "You used expansion charms?"

"Several. Do come in, please." Luna made a small curtsey and gestured extravagantly with the hand not currently holding the door open.

"Did you apply them yourself? It's supposed to be quite dangerous when it is incorrectly done." Ginny questioned a bit nervously.

Luna straightened herself, "I asked Daddy to help me."

Ginny didn't know if she should be reassured or feel more terrified. "I think I will stay here. I wouldn't want to get this nice floor dirty with earth or mud. The big lavabos in the centre look also very nice, a bit strange, but nice. Are there bathrooms too?"

Luna looked back inside. "That's the desk for directions and controls. The bathrooms are supposed to be through another door, but I haven't built them yet." She closed the door.

"Still, how does it work?" inquired Ginny.

"I wrote to Hermione Granger, she kindly sent me the spells she worked on during the last year, to smuggle objects and persons without alerting the Ministry."

"Well, I can't contest Hermione's proficiency. But now that Death Eaters don't control the Ministry anymore isn't it illegal?"

"We aren't trying to smuggle objects or persons."

Ginny choose not to contest this well-reasoned defence. "Did you test it?"

"Of course, all the mice, fishes, plants and rocks survived the translocation intact, even if it was a bit difficult to operate the commands from the door. I had to add a timer. Do you want to witness my first human test?"

"I don't think that it's ..." Ginny didn't have time to protest: Luna opened the door, marched inside, and closed the door behind her, all in the space of her friend's sentence. After a few seconds, the strange box shimmered a moment, then disappeared. Ginny looked around the garden and was relieved to see that the box had reappeared only a hundred yards away. Luna opened the door, and Ginny hurried to catch up.

"Are you OK?"

"Not even a few wrackspurts." Ginny was amazed at this success but realised she shouldn't have been: despite all oddities, Luna was a Ravenclaw.

"What are you going to use it for?"

"To search for the crumple-horned snorkack, silly! Do you want to come this time?"

And thus Ginny was recruited.

Many thanks to Misery-loathes-Company for being my beta.

"Of course, I can't build a box with a hazel boy. It wouldn't be proper." Considering Luna asked for a "hazel", I thought Neville would want more precisions, and Luna's precision was supposed to feel like it really came from left field. So I knew the sentence was confusing, but I left it because I wanted the reader to be confused.

"The big lavabos in the centre look very nice, a bit strange, but nice." I doubt Ginny would know what a console would look like, and I thought of the lavabos in the second film when I saw some old photos of the Tardis. I thought she could mistake the control desks for some more familiar thing : Hogwarts lavabos.