Getting back into track now. The fifth chapter of Roommate is in the making, so no worries :)

This very short piece isn't based on a pic, but was too short to post it extra.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece.

Of chances, reds and evil boyfriends

"You really are Sanji from the Strawhat pirates? Like really, really?!"

"The one and only!"

"But... your wanted poster... I mean..."

"Oh, that? Well, the marines made a mistake, you see?"

"Oooh..."

Zoro grinned as he emptied his twenty-seventh glass of rum that night. The only reason that big-breasted red-head hadn't left Sanji already was that she was apparently a complete airhead.

They sat in the corner of the pub and Sanji had elegantly put his arm around her slim shoulders while telling her about his identity. Their crew had grown quite famous over the years and pirate groupies were no rarity in this part of the Grand Line. Famous pirates were like boy-groups out here.

"I don't get you, man," Usopp said as he stared at Zoro. "Sanji is flirting over there and you're here grinning at the whole thing... Aren't you jealous?"

Frowning, Zoro turned around to look at Usopp instead of the pair in the back. "You still don't know how this is gonna end, do you?" Zoro said in a near fatherly tone.

"What do you mean?"

"This is the cook, we're talking about, Usopp."

"Soooo...?"

Zoro grinned again. "That guy never gets lucky... just watch."

They turned their eyes back to the couple. Sanji was just talking about how he had defeated a group of marines the week before, when the red-head's hand slowly slid up his leg and she leaned into his side, breasts pressing against his body.

And then it happened.

"H-H-H-Honey...chwaaaan!"

Face turning red, Sanji jumped up and his body seemingly boneless, he began to make a strange noodle dance as hearts began to form inside his eyes. The whole attention of the pub was suddenly at their table , but Sanji still continued to wiggle like that, unable to control his body.

The red-head, looking completely mortified at the sudden behaviour of the cool pirate she had wanted to seduce, quickly grabbed her bag and ran out of the pub.

Sanji shook his head to clear it as the girl left and yelled after her but it was already too late: His prey had once again slid through his claws.

"That's what you mean..." Usopp said as he stared at Sanji who slumped back onto his bank.

"Yep," Zoro replied and while filling his twenty-eighth glass with whiskey, he continued, "He always fucks up any bit of a chance he has got with a woman. All on his own. No need to be jealous at all."

Usopp sighed as he sipped at his own (first) glass. Looking at Sanji, he shook his head. "Poor guy... now I see why he had to settle on some one like y-" Usopp's words stopped abruptly as suddenly, Wado's blade was pressed under his nose.

"Care to continue those words?" Zoro asked with his most demonic grin. Usopp's eyes widened and he quickly shook his head, careful not to touch the sharp thing in front of him.

Still grinning, Zoro removed the sword and stood up. "Good. I'm gonna go and get my prize now... that guy is amazing when he is depressed! Later, Usopp!"

Wide-eyed, Usopp stared at how Zoro approached the miserable form of Sanji and sympathetically patted his back. After an impressive display of acting skills in which Zoro feigned the understanding boyfriend and listened to Sanji's complains, he pulled the blond up and led him outside the pub.

Usopp's mouth opened in shock as Zoro winked at him in passing.

"Evil. That guy is... completely... evil."

The End

I've also written a pretty long one-shot that is pretty much PWP and posted it on tumblr, but I want to edit it another time before I post it here. If you want to read it anyway, then you can still find the link to my tumblr on my profile page.

Later! :)