She's awake and his heart drums with relief, his hands are shaking but he can't stop them from threading in her hair, cupping her face in his palm.
He kisses her like they're the only ones in the room and her lips taste like dreams he had to put to rest long ago.
/
He wakes up in cold sweat, lower lip trembling from nightmares he can never get out of his head. She's there, curled up to his side in a tight little ball, but he can't be sure.
That's how the nightmare starts, when he thinks she's there but she turns out to be a ghost.
She wakes up to his face buried in her hair and mumbling 'don'tgodon'tgodon'tgo' over and over.
Lifting her head, she presses soft kisses along the side of his face, coos little reassurances until he shuts his eyes, arms tight around her.
"I'm here," She murmurs as he falls asleep with his head in the crook of her neck. "I'll always be here."
/
Him and Kyle still regard each other warily, offering small smiles and snide jabs all while keeping their distance.
(They pass each other once, with Sunny's arm looped through his and Wanda's fingers intertwined with his. The O'Sheas wrapped around the one thing they had vowed to despise.)
/
She slowly begins to ask him about his life before they arrived on earth, she starts with little things, like we he had originally want to be when he grew up, what he liked to learn about in school, if Kyle was always as abrasive as he was now.
One night, she gets to the one he's been dreading: his parents. He tries to talk about it, gets out a few sentences with him stumbling over his words.
He doesn't realize he's started to cry until she's turning on her side to face him, brushing her lips across his cheek to wipe away one of the tears that rolled down his skin.
"You don't have to talk about it." She murmurs, looking up at him. "I'm sorry I asked."
He doesn't talk about them with anyone, even with Kyle, they have preferred not to remember and disregard the past, settling into their new future.
"That's the thing, I think I want you to know."
/
Sometimes they still hear helicopters, whirring by up above the ground. They all hear it one day when they're eating and everyone looks up, eyes wide with fear.
He freezes, jaw clenching and setting his spoon down. Wanda bites her lip so hard it swells up later, her hand frantically finding his under the counter, their fingers locking together so tight their knuckles turn white.
/
He likes to know that she sleeps peacefully, curled up to his side and breathing easy.
He finds it difficult to sleep most night, but he gets better at waking up without screaming.
He doesn't have the heart to tell her about the images of cut up souls, her being buried in the dirt that won't leave me alone.
/
All the children follow her around in a row, like little ducklings, their eyes full of admiration. They fight over who gets to hold her hands and Ian finds himself having to pick her up and carry her away just to be with her alone.
They adore her, and the only way to get any of them to sleep anymore is to have her lay them down and tell them stories of her past lives.
She bandages their cuts and wipes their cheeks and braids back the girls hair and she's practically their mother, or at least an older sister.
One night she comes into their cave, Ian already laying down and waiting for her when she shows him a paper with a stick figure doodle on it.
"Freedom drew you." She says with a small smile, and he takes it from her and raises a brow.
"Why do I look deformed?" She furrows her brow and snatches the paper away, setting it against the wall with a little 'hmph'.
"You do not, it's good for someone his age."
"Do I have a third eye?"
"Ian, that's your nose!"
/
When they go on raids, she tries to avoid conversations with other souls as much as possible, but there are some she can't shake off.
When one asks for her name, she surprises herself by saying without hesitation:
"Wanda O'Shea."
/
They have a makeshift wedding in the game room, and she wears a white dress they found stained by desert dirt.
Jeb forgets the words halfway through the little ceremony, although Wanda doesn't realize, and he just shrugs and goes. "Well, you two going to kiss or what?"
(He has to lift her up to do it, and the cheers around them blur into background noise, her forehead against his when they pull away, both of them grinning in the dim light)
/
Her pale hair fans out behind her on the mat, knees tucked up to her chest and her lips parted, breathing softly, lost in sleep.
It's one of those rare days he wakes up before her and he rubs small circles on her back, resisting the urge to lean over and kiss her pale lips until she wakes.
She mumbles under her breath, pressing tighter against him, and he wishes he could slip inside her mind and know what she sees with her eyes shut.
/
They sit in the store parking lot, eyes narrowed as they watch a seeker walk by.
"Be safe, okay?" He murmurs so only she can hear, squeezing her hand. She smiles, always confident she will be, leaning over and kissing his lips quickly.
"I will, don't worry."
/
Whenever newcomers find their way inside the caves, he can see the hostility that flares in their eyes when they see Wanda.
He steps in front of her, hiding her from their anger.
He knows what it's like to be them, driven by fear to the point of hostility, to the point where your head is invaded by irrational thoughts.
He's known that anger, and he refuses to let it touch her ever again.
/