1: Possession

"We wanted to talk to you, Harry," said Ginny, "but as you've been hiding ever since we got back –"

"I didn't want anyone to talk to me," said Harry, who was feeling more and more nettled.

"Well, that was a bit stupid of you," said Ginny angrily, "seeing as you don't know anyone but me who's been possessed by You-Know-Who, and I can tell you how it feels."

Harry remained quite still as the impact of these words hit him. Then he wheeled round.

"I forgot," he said.

"Lucky you," said Ginny coolly.

"I'm sorry" Harry said, and he meant it. "So…so, do you think I'm being possessed, then?"

"Well, can you remember everything you've been doing?" Ginny asked. "Are there big blank periods where you don't know what you've been up to?"

Harry racked his brains.

"No," he said.

"Then You-Know-Who hasn't ever possessed you," said Ginny simply. "When he did it to me, I couldn't remember what I'd been doing for hours at a time. I'd find myself somewhere and not know how I got there."

Rowling J.K., Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, PDF, pages 373-374.

She had made some silly excuse afterwards and had left the room in a great hurry. Not minding her step on the stairs, she had almost ended up bruising her knees, but she had not stopped to check.

She wanted to be anywhere else, anywhere that did not remind her of her first year. The best she could do was to find a place where she could be alone so she could calm down.

12 Grimmauld Place was the exact opposite. Everything in this house screamed Tom Riddle and Dark Magic. This had not bothered her, until today.

She did a good job of ignoring the ominous shadows all around her. She even liked them. She liked being brave and tough and self-reliant. But she wished she could leave this place, either way.

Today of all days, the feeling was sharper because she had been reminded, she had been reminded of her greatest fear: possession.

She could not blame Harry for wanting to be sure. She wouldn't wish that fate on her worst enemy. The problem was, her memory would relive it from time to time. It was fragmentary now, barely coherent. But it made an impact, always, no matter how small.

If only she could erase the memory, deafen the voices. She knew that someday she would be so removed from her past that it would not matter, but she had doubts. Would that day ever come?

The next best thing to leaving 12 Grimmauld Place was distracting herself. And that's what she intended to do.

Sirius had already started decorating the place for Christmas and his cheerful mood was infectious. Everyone in the house was supposed to give a hand.

Ginny threw herself into this task with far too much keenness than usual. She even went back to scrubbing the cabinets she had hated months ago.

And she was certain no one would notice.

Until Harry approached her, two days later, with a guilty look on his face.

She had never thought that, with his present state of mind, he would actually pay heed to her words or even feel bad about what he had said. Not now. Not when he had everything else to worry about.

But she was wrong.

She was hanging garlands on the disused chandeliers in the dining room one morning when his voice almost made her start.

"Do you need any help with that?" he asked gently.

Ginny turned her head slightly but did not look directly at him.

"No, it's okay. I'm almost done anyway," she told him, climbing down the stepladder slowly. "I just have to get some streamers..."

"Listen, Ginny," he began feverishly, clenching his fists, "I'm glad I found you alone. I – I wanted to talk to you, about the other day. I want you to know I didn't mean to play down what happened to you. I know I acted like an idiot and I know I seem absent-minded these days, but I haven't forgotten –"

"Harry, please –" Ginny interrupted him, waving her arm nonchalantly.

"No," Harry continued, shaking his head, "you need to hear this. I was there too, that night when I found you down there. You went through something much worse. I can't imagine what that was like. And I'm sorry I didn't come to you. I really am."

Ginny sighed, lowering her eyes in sadness. You really could never stay or even be upset with Harry Potter. He was just too darn nice, all the time.

"You don't have anything to be sorry for," Ginny said, half-smiling. "I don't expect the entire world to keep track of my problems. You have enough going on."

"And I'm over it. It's in the past," she added, hoping he would not dwell on this obvious lie.

"You are? You must be a tough one then, because it must be really hard to move on from..." Harry trailed off, trying to find the right words.

"Harry. Stop feeling guilty about me. I'm fine. Feel guilty about being an arse to Hermione and Ron. But not about me," she told him, patting his shoulder weakly.

Harry chuckled shortly.

"I really have been difficult, haven't I?"

"That's a nice way of putting it," she nodded, smirking.

"Still, I should've come to you. I should've asked you. I'm an idiot, sometimes."

"Sometimes?" Ginny asked, raising an eyebrow.

Harry chuckled again. "All right, you got me. I'm probably more of an idiot than I know."

Ginny shook her head. "I guess... I guess I wouldn't have come to myself, either."

Harry seemed puzzled by her answer. "What do you mean?"

"Well, when you're wondering if you're going insane you don't go asking people. Especially if...He's involved," she explained.

Harry understood whom she was referring to.

"Is that why you never told anyone-"

"No," she cut him off quickly, "or maybe yes. I mean, if He takes over you, you don't ever feel the need to tell others. He makes sure of that."

Harry felt a shudder travelling down his spine. "That's terrifying."

Ginny shrugged her shoulders, trying to remain more detached than she really was.

"I guess my visions are fairly harmless in comparison," he added, shaking his head miserably. "I'm sorry, Ginny."

She tilted her head sideways.

"You know, you make it really hard not to like you."

Harry's eyes widened suddenly.

"S-Sorry?"

"Oh, no, not like that!" Ginny exclaimed, laughing at his confusion.

"I meant you're so kind and caring and you're always trying to make things better, it's impossible to hate you," she clarified.

"Is it?" he asked, smiling weakly.

"Yeah. It can get a bit annoying actually."

"So I should be more of an arse, for good measure?"

Ginny smirked ruefully. "Don't push it."

There was an awkward pause, during which Harry thought of something else to add to his apology, but Ginny cut him off.

"You should go get some breakfast. It's pretty early," she told him.

"I know. Why'd you think I got up so early? I reckoned you'd be the first one down here."

Ginny frowned. "You've noticed that, eh?"

"We're all trying to get busy."

"Mm. Guess so. Sirius' holiday cheer is unavoidable."

Harry smiled.

"Listen, Gin, if you ever need to talk about – about what happened – I'm here. If you ever need that. Although if you don't want to revisit that memory, I'll understand."

Ginny sighed. "You're right about the second part. Thanks anyway, Harry."

"Don't mention it," he replied, a bit livelier than when he'd come in.

He felt a bit better now, after having talked things out with her, brief as it had been.

Ginny nodded her head and turned back to her task at hand.

"See you in the kitchen," she added, bending down to pick up the decorations.

Harry stared at her figure for a moment. He wanted to tell her how he knew she put on a brave front, because he did the exact same thing every day.

But at the last moment he changed his mind. It was not the right moment. Maybe they would have a proper talk someday.

Ginny heard his steps fade into the hallway and she wondered how it had come to this. There was a gap between them. They weren't as good friends as they were with other people.

They were transitory, just like 12 Grimmauld Place, just like the past.

But maybe that was not such a bad thing. Maybe that was enough for now.