Chapter One

Screw-ups

The single worse emotion in the universe for Tony Stark was feeling as if he had screwed up. That may sound like a lie, as many would say that he messes up constantly; getting drunk, sleeping with random people, peeing in the Iron man suit…in public.

But he doesn't see those as screw ups, he mostly just sees those as facets of his personality, they're not mistakes, and therefore screw-up if you plan to get smashed and laid. No, what he considers screw-ups is when he allows people to get too close. Especially when he can't precisely calculate their reactions to his actions and/or remarks. The only reason it took such a ridiculously long amount of time for Tony to remember Peppers birthday or anything else about her is because it took his that long to force himself not to disappear and ignore her because she could be trusted.

There was a reason that he only had three close friends and one close-ish friend, and considering that Obadiah turned out to be a manipulative evil sack of shit Tony felt very justified in his extreme choosiness in companions. People complained that he was too independent and he wasn't a team player, but they didn't realise that that's not necessarily a failing on his part. It's just that people leave, they always do and he'd much prefer they left as a relative stranger than as a close friend. Much less pain that way. For all involved.

So he sort of hated the fact that now he was part of a team, people that he not only had to associate with but trust with his life. Needless to say that was not a scenario that he was pleased with, so he bickered and poked and mocked. Because that's what Tony Stark always did, pretend like you know what you're doing and everybody will go along with it.

Tony could fake with the best of them, besides he didn't have to put up with them long. Just missions, except that's when he really screwed up. It was bad enough that he "teamed up" with them to begin with, that was a necessary evil (like sleep and food). No, he had to go ahead and invite them all to live with him too. In his tower, what an inane thing to do.

Sometimes for days at a time he would forget about how much of a colossal fuck-up that was, and then it would hit him. That little voice in that back of his head that would berate him. Saying how stupid this whole arrangement was.

Reminding him what the plan was, work with them and forget about them. No attachments=no pain. But it seemed as he was a glutton for punishment, because he just kept making more attachments. More links, more friends. But that wasn't the worst of it, he had to go ahead and get a stupid little crush.

He was crushing on a kid too, it was embarrassing, and by kid he wasn't talking about like a twelve year old. He was like 25, which only made him like twelve years younger. So basically a child, but in Tony's defence he was a gorgeous brunette, and clever and a smart arse. He would have been a perfect one-night stand, or in a pinch a very nice and convenient fuck buddy.

But no he had to go ahead and develop feelings. He was working as a tech/IT guy in one of his labs part-time, and it was only by pure chance that he'd seen him at all.

Tony still wasn't sure if this was providence or a curse. He was hoping for the former but was 90% sure that it was the second. In his private opinion, he was sure that god hated him it was the only explanation.

It wasn't that he was unaware that he liked men, or that it was a deep dark horrible secret.

When Tony fucked someone he didn't care who knew and that seemed only to help his public opinion. No, it was that he actually genuinely liked this guy, and he really didn't want to. Actual emotions were dangerous they led to attachments that led to pain. It was a linear path, and Tony had never known it to deviate, he wasn't sure if that was due to the fundamental psychology of humanity or something specific to him. For once in his life, he decided not to think upon it further.

The fact that he had a crush wasn't so bad it was that for some reason, unknown to man or god he decided that he should act upon it. That he should actually flirt with this guy, and ask him to dinner and he did.

So as he was standing here ruminating on his epic stupidity his question hung in the air, waiting for an answer from Peter Parker.

He really hated it when he screwed up.