Author's Note: Hello! So I wrote this fic in response to the episode "Compass", which disappointed me on so many levels, not least important of which being, I kind of liked the 'Jimmy' character. He struck me as one of the more interesting characters introduced, and I felt like he had a lot of potential, but it was frustrating, because I also felt like the show writers never really seemed to know what to do with his character. I wasn't really surprised they killed Jimmy, I actually called it on the season premier, and I think that's what frustrated me most. Way to be predictable, Falling Skies writers. Anyhow, I felt very empty about the whole episode. I had wanted to get to know Jimmy, wanted to fall in love with his character, and it never happened and I really thought they killed him off too soon. Oh well, I'm rambling.

Anyhow, I wrote this as a way to give myself closure on that episode. This story is heavily Jimmy-centric.

Summary: Jimmy and Ben's relationship grows out of their first patrol together. While war rages around and inside of Jimmy, somewhere between himself and Ben, he finds a strange peace.

Warnings: This story is rated 'M', for sexuality, language, alcohol and possibly drug use, some extremely dark subject matter, intense angst, possibly graphic and bloody violence, and all that other good stuff. The main relationship of this story is of a homosexual nature, if that discomforts you then I suggest you leave. Any anonymous reviews critically addressing my pairing choice will be deleted, any signed reviews critically addressing my pairing choice will receive a response and trust me, you won't want a response. I have given you ample warning, you can hit your back button at any time, continuing to read is of your own volition and I cannot be held responsible for your actions.

Disclaimer: I disclaim.

First Patrol

I.

The first night Jimmy and Ben were assigned together on patrol had been little more than a partnering of convenience and circumstance. Before that night, Jimmy had usually done rounds with an older ginger-haired boy named Franklin. They'd partnered together a number of times since 2nd Mass had set out and got along alright together.

Despite proving himself capable time and again, other scouts refused to work alongside the formerly-harnessed Ben, too much lingering mistrust and too great a reminder of current events – Ben's father, Professor Mason, climbing into a space craft with one of the alien scourges didn't exactly help his floundering image. Bad for morale, Captain Weaver explained away his tolerance of the fighters' behaviors and as reasoning for keeping Ben, for the most part, on the sidelines.

Jimmy had always been close to Ben's family, though. Professor Mason empathized with Jimmy's situation, but didn't coddle the orphaned teenage boy as most of the other adults tended to do. At least, the ones that weren't behind his back secretly wishing the 2nd Massachusetts would leave him behind, seeing him as nothing more than a burden on the group to care for and a useless mouth to feed.

Admittedly, Jimmy didn't trust Ben when the other boy was freshly un-harnessed. At times, he could be more cruel than any of the other children, perhaps, because of his close relations with the rest of the Mason family. Part of him felt threatened by the return of the middle Mason son, having been for a time Ben's de facto replacement, and part of him felt obligated to befriend Ben and his hate of that obligation caused him to rebel viciously against it. Didn't he have enough responsibilities on his shoulders to carry without adding a forced friendship with the weird freaky kid?

Almost like a comical joke played by the cosmos, Ben seemed intent on befriending Jimmy. In those first several days after the harness came off and he learned to live life again as an independent human with a free will and full-use of his facilities, Ben followed Jimmy around camp like a lost puppy dog. It came to a point where Jimmy felt like a cornered rabbit. He pushed the envelope of his cruelty towards the other boy, causing a rift between himself and the Mason family, and took to hiding in store rooms and loose air vents in the school building the convoy had set up camp at when he wasn't actively serving the 2nd Mass.

And then the incident in the mountains happened. The 2nd Mass children were sent away to an alleged haven that turned out to be a trap laid by traitorous humans dealing with the Skitters. Ben played a pivotal role in helping them all escape, and Jimmy was forced to reconsider his conflicted feelings towards Ben. He made attempt to treat the other boy more fairly, after all, he owed a lot to the Mason family and it wasn't as though it were Ben's fault the alien invaders had taken him hostage and turned him into a weird freaky kid. Jimmy was far from wanting to be best friends but he became the only child in the 2nd Mass that was not an immediate member of Ben's family to tolerate Ben's presence.

So when Franklin fell ill, Weaver seized the opportunity to stick Jimmy with Ben.

The partnership got off to a rocky start. They argued the first fifteen minutes of their patrol about which route to take.

"We should head up north first, follow the creek around the perimeter, then take the interstate back to camp. It's more efficient, we can cover more ground in less time," Ben hissed, he'd been repeating the same plan most of the argument as though restating his idea somehow made it more appealing, "You know I'm right, you just don't want to admit it."

Someone seriously needs to teach this kid better persuasion techniques, Jimmy thought

"Most of that trek is over rough terrain," Jimmy shot back, "And there's no coverage along the interstate! Me and Frankie have been working the same route the past week, it's solid and there's no reason to change it up now. This is just a one night thing anyhow, tomorrow Frankie will be feeling better and we'll go back to patrolling together again, so you don't have to put so much effort into it."

That seemed to end the argument for Ben and while Jimmy didn't understand the other boy's sudden loss of interest in arguing his cause, Jimmy didn't really press the matter, glad to have won and to finally be getting on with the night's patrol.

For the most part, they spent that first patrol in silence. It wasn't until a few hours in that the silence ended with another argument about when and where to take a break and eat the stale saltine crackers and Slim Jims they'd been given for the walk.

"Do we really need to stop now?" Ben demanded, "Can't you keep going for just a few more hours? Then our shift will end and you can just eat back at camp."

The desperation to press on glimmering in Ben's wide wild-looking eyes frightened Jimmy in some ways. Yet in other, very strange ways, it excited Jimmy.

Professor Mason and Hal, the eldest Mason boy, had never talked much about Ben before recovering him from the Skitters. It was as though, to them, speaking about their missing family member was paramount to condemning him to a fate worse than death. But the youngest Mason boy, Matt, had spoken about Ben often and when Jimmy had had the time and patience, he would sit and listen to the small boy's reverent ramblings of his lost elder sibling.

The Ben that Matt had painted with words, of a shy bookworm, looked nothing like the Ben that stood before Jimmy, with arms folded across his chest and hard, intense eyes staring in an almost threatening way. Predatory, came to mind. Ben Mason was predatory. And the way he looked at Jimmy, sometimes, it felt as though he were assessing his prey.

Ben was a hunter and Jimmy his hunted.

The idea flitted into Jimmy's mind that first patrol, almost in the way a scrap of paper flits in the wind, only to solidify into something hard and permanent, taking root and growing, branches stretching upwards and outwards, and try as he might he couldn't shake it free.

"Maybe you can keep going without rest but some of us are only human," Jimmy scoffed, again causing Ben to abruptly lose interest in the argument.

They found an inlet with a rock overhang to settle in and eat. Jimmy sat on the damp ground and ripped open his Slim Jim. Ben leaned against the back of their little inlet, resting his rifle across his lap and closed his eyes. For several minutes they sat like that. Jimmy ignored Ben, eyes wandering out at their forested surroundings. Though he kept one ear alert to Ben, aware of every shuffle and shift of the other boy's body.

"Hal spoke about you a lot," Ben finally spoke up.

Jimmy took a sip from his canteen of fresh river water and remained silent.

"When I first came to, after they took off the harness," Ben went on, "He was catching me up on things, I guess."

Jimmy made a noise in his throat. Ben moved the rifle up to lean across his chest and against his shoulder, its barrel pointing upwards.

"He kept telling me stories about things you had done, things you and he had done."

If things had been awkward before than this was just downright disturbing. Jimmy took another bite of his Slim Jim and tried to remain apathetic to the conversation, despite the terrible stone-cold feeling settling against his chest.

So Jimmy had looked up to Hal for a time, thought of him like an older brother, tagged along a lot.

So Hal had been looking for someone about Jimmy's age to replace a gaping hole in his life where Ben was meant to be.

So Jimmy had been looking for someone, anyone, to fill the gaping hole in his life where his family used to be.

So they had needed each other and things had worked out.

At least, worked out until Ben came back and Hal didn't need Jimmy as his adoptive brother anymore. And Jimmy understood, sort of, that a substitute loses purpose when the real thing returns and he was fine with making himself scarce.

It all figured itself out, right? Jimmy had backed down and Ben had retaken his rightful place as the second eldest Mason son. So where the hell was Ben going with this, exactly?

"I was jealous, you know," Ben continued and Jimmy smirked sardonically to himself. Of course that's where this was going, "I kept thinking, what do I care about this Jimmy kid. It was supposed to be me doing all those things with Hal, but I was too busy serving some alien overlords, right?"

"I'm not going to say 'sorry', if that's what you want," Jimmy muttered. He tilted his head to one side so he could watch Ben without actually looking interested in the other boy's actions.

"I don't. You know, because after awhile I realized what Hal was really trying to say. What he was trying to tell me. He was saying, this Jimmy is a good kid and that he wanted us to be friends," Ben explained.

Jimmy said nothing. He shifted uncomfortably, took another bite of his Slim Jim to give him something to do with his mouth. Ben sighed and shook his head, as though silently laughing at a joke no one told.

"Somehow...that made it easier for me to listen to the stories. And you know, as he told me more and more about you, you know what I realized?"

Ben opened his eyes and locked them on to Jimmy's own iridescent blue orbs.

"I like you, Jimmy," he admitted, firm and unwavering.

The confession sent a shiver up Jimmy's spine and caused his heart to crash at breakneck speed against his chest. He didn't know exactly how to respond, so he didn't, remaining stoic, his expression apathetic. Ben lowered his eyes and looked away, as if suddenly bashful.

"I guess that sounds weird," Ben mumbled.

"Yeah. It does," Jimmy snapped, turning his attention back to the forest to hide the color suddenly spreading through his face.

"When Hal talked about you, you just sounded like someone I could have been friends with. You know, before," Ben explained. His voice was a lot softer now, uncertain. He sounded afraid, as though he'd crossed some invisible line and was just waiting for the horrible repercussions.

Before.

Jimmy weighed the word in his mind. It used to be such a simple word and now it carried such a deep, multifaceted meaning for humanity's last survivors.

Sometimes Jimmy couldn't remember before. Before he had killed another living being. Before he'd picked up a gun and felt its heaviness in his hand, and the kick of its recoil. Before the 2nd Mass had claimed him amongst their ranks. Before he'd spent months as a frightened child searching for signs of life amongst a wrecked city. Before he'd left home one morning, said the last words he would ever say to his family again, and the sky came crashing down to Earth.

Before.

"We should get going," Jimmy said in a voice that sounded cracked and strained even to himself. His mouth was dry and his eyes slightly damp around the edges.

They didn't talk the rest of the way back to camp.

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