Okay, so this is just an idea and I just wanted to see how people think of it. So here's the first chapter and if you like it, I'll continued writing.

Love Is Just A Memory

Chapter 1: Wally

The mission was simple. Observe and report back to Batman. That was it. But there I was, standing on top of a hill, staring at a burning warehouse.

I felt like my lungs burst, but I screamed anyway, I yelled, begged for her name, begged for a miracle. "Artemis!"

My knees buckled under me, my chest tightened, I felt like I was suddenly breaking into a million tiny pieces. It also felt like I was falling. I was yelling, yelling so hard I could barely catch my breath. All I wanted was to feel the ground punch the air out of me already, because no pain was compared to what I was feeling then. But I didn't land, I never did. It was like I was falling in an endless pit and I all I wanted was to get it over with. Let me die, already. I was begging for something that I had avoided countless times.

I wanted to run to her, to save her, to protect her like I said I would. Like I promised I would. But my trusty legs failed me; I collapsed on the rocky ground though I still felt like I was free falling. Tears were already running down my cheeks, cooling my burning skin.

The rest of the night was a blur to me. All I remembered was the pain, which was mostly because I feel it every day. Every day, I feel like I'm losing her again. The worst part of the day is when I wake up in the morning, and all of it hits me, again and again. The fact that she was gone, that she wasn't with me anymore. And every morning, I had to force myself to sit up, stand up, run and run to save more people without feeling the glory like I used to.

I wish I could run from it all. Forget it ever happened. And just remember the love I felt when I was with her.

But that's just a foolish dream that will stay a fantasy.

I wish it wasn't though.

Crazy right? How someone can drive you insane, mad, so happy you think you might as well jump to the moon.

I miss that feeling. I miss the mixed emotions. Although one thing was sure, I loved her. I love her. And I'll never stop loving her.

I don't care if that's the reason why I'm in so much pain, because without that pain, I would never have known how to love.

Sometimes even, when I feel like the pain is too much, I go to the beach. The last place I really spent with her. I remember it so vividly, like it happened the day before. We loved staring at the sunset, staring as it slowly made its way to somewhere new. We were sitting on one of my red and yellow towels, my arms wrapped tightly around her while she laid her head on the place where my shoulder and chest met. I remember kissing her temple, telling her the words I always did. I love you. And then she would say it back, and I could feel that she meant every single word. I miss her saying it, so close to my ear, making my insides twirl and tighten and go crazy. Just being with her made me feel like I was the luckiest person on earth. Sometimes, I feel like I can hear her whisper it to me.

But I know I'm just missing her. I always do.

I remember the sun finally going down, I remember the moonlight shining on the beach, I remember my grip tighten around her.

I shouldn't have let her go.

It's been a 2 years since she died.

Too fast, I keep thinking.

But sometimes, I have this feeling that makes me feel uneasy.

I open my eyes. I stare at my ceiling for another good five minutes before I finally get up, like I do every morning since she died. Then I realize Nightwing's sitting on my chair, waiting. I must have been asleep longer than I thought. Then, I look at my clock, it says 4:00 a.m. No, I'm wrong. I woke up a good 2 to 3 hours earlier than I was supposed to. Then I remember that it's been exactly 2 years the last time I've seen her.

My head is spinning even before my feet touch the ground. I try to remember what happened last night. The last thing I recall was going inside a bar and order a beer or two. Or maybe more. I don't remember.

"Looks like a pretty bad hangover you got there." Nightwing says, looking straight at me. His expression is worried but I don't care.

I ignore him and go to the bathroom. I turn on the faucet and wet my face, which is sweaty, like every other morning. I put my hands on each side of the sink and lean on it for a while, not daring to look at the mirror. Instead, I decide to look at my hand. It's trembling. Shaking so bad that I wouldn't be surprised if Dick would be able to feel it from where he is.

I take a shaky and rough breath and then finally look at myself. I have bruises on my cheekbone, a cut on my forehead and a black eye. I curse under my breath. I must have gotten into a fight last night. I do that sometimes, when I get drunk intentionally, fortunately it's not as bad as the broken collar bone I got a last year.

My face is dry as soon as I whip it with my face towel. And I head back to my room, where unsurprisingly, Nightwing is still sitting. Waiting really. For me probably.

I sit down at the edge of my twin bed, facing Dick, putting my elbows on my knees and my fingers intertwined, palms sweat already.

That's when Dick finally takes off his mask, revealing his bright blue eyes that only a few people on the Team have ever seen. His eyes look at me serious. It makes him look older, more mature.

He leans over, "It's been a two years, Wally." He tells me, but I'm only half listening, like I have for the past 2 years of my life.

I exhaled sharply, and then I wince, there's a burning pain on my abdomen but try to ignore it once it doesn't leave; "Don't you think I know that, Dick?" I use his real name; he flinches just a little bit, as he always does when I say his name in the cave. But he ignores it. He normally doesn't. But he does it for me. Because he wants it to be about me.

I don't know if I do.

I don't know if I care about myself anymore. I'm not even sure if there is a 'myself' left to care for. Without her, I was pretty much nothing.

Before I can think of anything else, I hear a small voice, "I should have gone with her." I don't realize for another few moments that it's mine.

"Wally." Nightwing says, "It's not your fault, you know that."

I look down at my feet, "I do." I say without looking at him, "But how come it feels like it does?"

He has no answer. Of course he doesn't. He never felt the way I feel. He never lost someone he was in love with.

Honestly, I consider myself lucky. I never lost a family member while he lost his entire family all in one night; he was alone until Batman took him in.

But I don't feel lucky. I feel like I lost the most precious thing in the world. Scratch that, the most precious human being in the world.

"I don't know why I felt her check the place out by herself." I mutter, still not looking at him, even though he took off his mask just so he could look at me in the eye, "It was so freaking simple, we didn't even need the whole Team with us." I continue, already feeling my eyes water, "She was caught so she light the place on fire just so she wouldn't have to reveal anything to them." That's when I finally look at him, almost regretting doing so. Almost. "She killed herself because she didn't trust herself. She thought it would overcome her."

I stop talking. "It's one of the most heroic things someone has ever done." Nightwing says, his voice so low I can barely hear him.

"Damn right it is!" I don't know why I snap, I just do. "She grew up, trained to become a master assassin and somehow, a freaking miracle happens, she knows it's not right so she becomes a superhero." I take a deep breath and I realize my hands are still shaking, "She doubted herself so much. She was so scared that she would turn against us. So insecure about herself that she would hide it from us, and then kill herself to protect us. That's how much she cared about this Team!" I don't know why I'm yelling, but I do anyway, I don't care if I wake up Superboy like I do every time I wake up from a nightmare.

Her last words, no her last thoughts to me repeat in my head, like it does so many other days.

Guys, I―I got caught. She said using the physic link, I could hear her voice, so panicked, yet so calm.

Wait, Artemis, I told her, terrified, I'll be there in a few minutes, just wait! Wait for me!

Don't! She said, They're already locking the place up! They know that there are more than just me.

Artemis, I have to get you out of there!

Wally, there's no way in! Sheargued. I remember, she was good at that.

Well what do you expect me to do! Just watch and wait?

For a long while she said nothing, and then finally, You might as well.

What do you mean? I was angry, and panicked, and scared. I had no idea what she had meant at the time.

They're going to question me. I―I can't trust myself. Wally, I'm scared.

Artemis, no please. It was Miss Martian, who was already weeping. I didn't know why, I was too frightened to understand what she meant.

It's useless trying to get to me, Artemis said, we'll both die.

No, Nightwing said, almost begging, we'll find a way, just―just hold tight.

She paused again, it made me more nervous. There's no time left, she finally said, actually, you're a bit too late.

Artemis! What the heck do you think you're doing? I yelled inside my thoughts.

I could pretty much feel her sad, depressed smile, Thank you for being my family guys, I don't deserve you.

Artemis! I was already up, running down the hill that we used to hide us and I was so close. So close. But she was right. I was too late.

And before I could tell her to hold on, I heard her voice in my head again, Wally, thank you so much. You don't deserve to love me. But I do love you. I love you. She repeated.

I heard a gunshot, and that's when the explosion happened. I was thrown back a good 7 feet away and landed on my stomach. I yelled in pain. But I didn't care, I turned around was on my feet before I knew it but I felt arms go around mine, holding me back. Superboy.

"I love you too." That was all I was able to mumble after I yelled her name.

We stayed there for half an hour, staring at the fire, weeping, mourning, just simply crying. I remember, Conner even broke a boulder into two. M'gann was crying, after he broke the rock, Superboy came to her and held her tight. Nightwing's mask was wet, he didn't take it off. Me, I was so angry, sad, all my feelings, balled up. I had never hated the world so much. I remember yelling, I almost forgot. I yelled at the top of my lungs. Her name, I was screaming her name again.

My costume was torn in a few parts, heck; I still have burn mark on my forearms from the explosion. But I didn't care, I didn't even have my burns check out for another three days, when Nightwing forced me to tell Black Canary.

I'm 19 right now. I never thought that I'd go through all of this in 19 years. Never.

I sit down in my usual seat at Central City Café, in the corner, beside the huge window looking out at the street. I wrap my hand around my coffee; it warms me even though it's the middle of June. I take a sip of it and let it burn my throat and I close my eyes. At least until I felt something tap my right leg. I open my eyes and stare at small, yellow ball that hit me. I pick it up and stare at it a little while more.

Before I know it, there's a little girl of maybe 2 years of age in front of me. She has a light tan, Asian features and auburn hair. She was stares at me, waiting.

I look at her right in the eye and then put on a smile, "Hey, kiddo." I say, hoping I sound friendly and don't scare her with my bruises, "Is this yours?" I show the ball and make it turn on my index finger. She looks at me, amazed.

She nods at me eagerly. It's cute.

"What's your name, kid?" I ask, finally giving her the ball as she takes it.

She opens her mouth to say something but is interrupted, "Lian!" I hear a voice say.

I freeze. No, I think, I'm just paranoid.

But the voice is so familiar that I would recognize it anywhere. But it's just not possible. You're just imagining it, Wally, I think, it's been 2 years. You're just hearing things.

That's when she comes toward us and hugs the little girl, whose name was apparently Lian.

"God, Lian!" she rubs the little girl's back, "Don't ever do that to me again! You scared me!"

And that's when she lifts her head.

And I can't breathe. I swear I hear my heart stop beating. But all I do is stare.

Artemis.

She was Artemis.

She is Artemis.

Okay this chapter is longer than my usual ones but I really hope you like it. And like I said, I just wanted to try this idea out and see how people react to it. Thanks for reading and PLEASE REVIEW!