Author's Note: Okay, here is the last chapter of this little story. I hope you all enjoy it… and on another note. I've been noticing a lack in Harm/Mac JAG fiction here lately, so when you're done reading, I would like you to all please write a story. I don't know what it should be about, but you should write one. I've got one half started and I'm still working on updating my other fic too, so I promise that I'm doing my part. :) Hope you enjoy and review if you would like!
The way we just fit into things still amazes me, but doesn't really surprise me if that makes any kind of sense. We agreed that we did want to raise the baby together as both parents, but we didn't necessarily put a label on anything. Everything was completely platonic between the two of us for the following months, except for the fact that we were in a more intimate relationship with each other emotionally than either of us ever had been.
Sex hadn't even re-entered the picture, because we knew that if it did, we would lose our focus on the greater goal. No label, but a definite love for each other was seen by all. It was like we radiated coupleness without being a couple.
"Harm, it's a girl, we aren't getting a navy blue carseat and stroller."
"Oh, but getting that pale version of Marine green is totally okay?" he combats back at me.
"The fact that it is green has nothing to do with why I like it, I just think it's pretty!" I say, letting my voice get louder.
"You are so determined to make this kid into a jarhead, aren't you?"
"Just as much as you are determined to make her a squid."
"Well, as of right now, the kid has spent all her life under water, so I feel she's a perfect candidate for Anapolis." He says with that smug grin while walking up and then placing a hand gently on my stomach.
Leaning down, like he always does, he starts telling our daughter how much nicer the naval uniforms are, even though mommy looks so hot in the Marine greens.
"Harm!" I say, smacking the top of his head and placing my hand over his on my stomach.
"Just kidding… you can be whatever you want, little one… we'll love you no matter what… even if I have to push you around in that green stroller."
We he comes back up, he kisses my forehead before putting his hands on his hips and taking a step back to look at the display.
"What about the beige print over there?"
"That could work, I like it."
"And if we have another—"
My eyes shoot to his for a second before we are interrupted by an older woman coming up to us in the aisle. Saved by the bell indeed.
"I'm sorry, but I couldn't help but overhear the two of you… how long have you been married?" She says with the largest smile in the universe split between the two of us.
"Nine years." Harm says, it falling out of his mouth like he's said it every day.
"And this is your first?" She asks and I nod before she continues, "My husband and I had five altogether, and now I'm shopping for grandchildren. I'm going to tell you what I told my own though… Babies thrive when they know how in love their parents are. They just know… and from what I can tell, this baby is going to be a very lucky little one. The love in your eyes can be seen a mile away." She says with a grin before walking away in search of something for her grandchild.
I turn to Harm then, with a slight bit of tears in my eyes, "Nine years, huh?"
"What can I say? You had me at an outstretched hand and a confident 'Mac.'" He says, almost brushing it off as something that he again says every day before grabbing the box that had the beige patterned stroller and seat.
I laugh at this before remembering what he said before the woman came over, "Harm?"
"Hmm?" he says distracted by trying to figure out a way to get the box into the cart we had.
"What were you going to say?"
"When?"
"Before, when that woman came up to us… you said that the carseat would be perfect if we have another…." I say trailing off just like the conversation did.
His instant blush was a surprise to me and he quickly tried to recover by telling me that he was talking about another car. Something about how beige would go with different interiors.
"Oh."
"Why, what did you think I was going to say?"
"I thought you were talking about us having another kid."
"Oh…well…I…"
"Off the hook, sailor. I'm not fishing…." I say, not wanting him to think that I was trying to get him to commit to something that neither of us was really ready to talk about.
I'm lost in thinking about how perfect he and I would be together based on how we are in the day to day now. Add a couple of kids, a big dog, and a nice suburban house and I feel like we would be more than okay. He snaps me out of my fantasies all too quickly though.
"Is that all you wanted to get today, or do you want to look around some more?"
"No, I'm getting tired. I need to take a nap when we get home."
"Did we overdo it?"
I shake my head and he gives me a glare before asking me if I was sure.
"I'm fine. I'm eight months pregnant… so I'm tired."
If I thought I was tired then, I didn't know what could have possibly prepared me for the following days.
"Harm?" I say, sitting up in bed as much as I could and tapping him on the shoulder.
"Hmm?" He says, coming slowly awake and turning toward me.
"I think I'm having contractions…" I say calmly, knowing that the second he realizes what I just said, he's going to freak out.
"You what?" he says still in that cute sleepy voice before the realization hit, "Wait, you're having WHAT?" he then screams, shooting up in bed.
"I think I'm having contractions. It's –" I'm cut off by the stabbing pain in my back and shooting around my stomach.
He reaches for my hand as I ride out the wave and he also places one hand on my stomach to see what it was doing as well.
"It's just what the doctor said, your stomach is getting all tight. How long has it been since your last one?"
"About nine minutes or so… closer together than a while ago."
"Why didn't you wake me up?"
"I just did…" I say with a smile that I know annoys him.
"All right, let's get you to the hospital."
"Harm, you're forgetting the fact that I'm only 34 weeks along… this isn't supposed to happen for a while."
"The doctor said that the endometriosis could make you go earlier, Sarah. That's why we got your bag ready and the nursery ready. Now the baby's ready, and it's going to be fine."
The calm was surprising on his part, but much needed on my part, and we made it to the hospital without a hitch. It must have been the fighter pilot in him, because I could see the slight tremors of nerves every now and then in him as he helped me get ready and as he held me through a few of the contractions that followed. I couldn't have done this without him… I already know that.
Baby wasn't ready though… she wasn't anywhere near ready when they wheeled me into the delivery room. Nearly twenty-four hours later, she still wasn't here and I didn't know how much longer I could take it.
"Colonel, we've gotten to the point now where we are going to really speed this along by giving you a drug to thin out your cervix and speed up the labor. The only downside of this is that your epidural is wearing off and if you want to do this now, I can't give you another one."
"What's better for the baby?"
"The baby is starting to get restless in there and we are seeing a slight drop in her heart rate. It isn't anything to be concerned about yet, but if it continues to drop, we would have to do a C-Section."
"No, give me the other drug… it'll be fine."
"Mac." Harm says with his voice laced in concern.
"It's better for the baby… besides, I'm a Marine." I deliver the last line in a monotone that has him smirking.
"You are a Marine who has essentially been in labor for the last twenty-four hours."
After exchanging a few more unspoken words, I turn to the doctor one last time.
"I'd like to do what's best for the baby."
"Okay, then I suggest that you try best to shut your eyes while the epidural is still in your system a bit, because once this drug enters your system it could be anywhere from a few hours to a half hour for this baby to want out of there."
My eyes widen and I can feel Harm squeeze my hand in reassurance before the doctor walks out of the room in search of a nurse to get whatever it is into my IV.
"I'm here. You don't have to worry about anything, cause I'm right here."
"Are we ready for this?"
"Mac, I think that you and I were ready for this the day we promised each other that we would have a baby together on the steps of JAG headquarters."
"We were young…"
"We knew what we were getting ourselves into."
"Did we?"
"I did."
I smile, again forces to think about how he has shown me and told me these past months about all the ways he has loved me through the years. The way he would describe certain cases to me again and add in something about how beautiful I looked that day in court or how lucky our baby was to have my wits. This was another one of those moments.
It was an hour later that the contractions got to the point of me needing to push, which was something even this Marine was having a hard time doing after a day of labor.
"Come on Mac, you can do this."
"I'm so tired."
"Colonel, you need to push on this next contraction, come on, get ready."
"I can't."
"Mac… Sarah… you can do this… come on, I love you, and this baby is going to be so perfect and so lucky to have you as a mom. You can do this." Harm says, never letting his glance stray from mine.
"I'm tired, Harm."
"I know you are, but you can do this…come on Mac. I'm here. I told you I would never leave, Sarah, and I'm here right now. Come on, so we can meet our little girl. We have to see if she's got your looks and my brains or my looks and your brains, remember."
"You have too good a memory at times, Harmon Rabb."
"Only when it's concerning you, Sarah MacKenzie. You can do this."
When the contraction hit, I could feel the pain rip through me as I held on to Harm's hand and screamed louder than a drill sergeant through basic.
Then I heard the sweetest of sounds. It was the tiny little wail of our daughter, taking her first breaths.
"You did a great job." The doctor says, holding her up and handing her off to a nurse to be cleaned and tested before she came back to me.
"Dad, do you want to come over here so you can hand off your daughter to mom?" the nurse asks and Harm all but runs over to the plastic bassinet to retrieve the wrapped up little bundle.
"Oh my God, she's beautiful." He says, walking over to me and looking at me with tears in his eyes that I'd only seen a few times in the time I'd known him.
When he puts her in my arms, my heart literally stops at the sight before me. Pink, soft baby skin and little fingers poking out of her blanket. She was ours. It was as if the entire universe came together in one instant to make this tiny little life happen and I couldn't be more grateful. My tears flowed freely when I looked up from the baby to Harm, who leaned down and kissed me with all the love in the world.
We were a family.
These were the words that were going through my head as I lay awake in the hospital bed, staring at my newborn daughter laying across from me in her bassinet with Harm laying in the hospital chair with one hand on the cart that held her and the other resting next to me on the bed. Even in his sleep he protected us.
I love him. I don't think that there is any possible way to get around the fact that I know this is the man that I'm going to spend the rest of my life being madly in love with.
So naturally, when he wakes up and catches me switching back and forth between staring at him and our daughter, I say the first thing that comes to my mind.
"Marry me?"
He smiles, leaning up in the chair to see me better.
"Do you really love me?" he asks in a teasing way because he would have to be blind to not believe me.
"I was disobeying Chegwidden's order since the first ride to JAG."
"His order?"
"Don't get too close, you'll be working together."
"We should be court martialed."
"Maybe we could convince them to let us share a cell in the brig?"
"What about the baby?" He asks, gesturing toward the bassinet.
"Chegwidden's retired… I think we're safe."
With that, he leans in to kiss me and I know my final answer to the one night we spent together months ago.
Definitely, definitely worth it.