Shepard looked around the trees in the dense forest. Paper and debris floated through the musty air. The child ran as fast as his short legs could take him, his jacket was slightly too big for his body. She continued to pursue him.

The whispers returned. Plumes of smoke surrounded her like shadows, writhing in the darkness. She heard her name, as if the voice breathed on the nape of her neck. "Shepard, come back."

She focused on the boy and kept running, but everything was slow, sluggish. Suddenly, she halted, and watched as the boy ran eagerly to a figure that crouched to take him into their arms. On a closer inspection, Shepard squinted her eyes to reveal the person was a mirror image of herself. She watched as the other Shepard embraced the child, and looked up to her, an almost smug look on her face.

They watched her as they both were consumed by the flames, their faces stuck in a forever smile until they vanished into nothing.

Gasping, Shepard awoke from her dream, absorbing her surroundings. Above her, the seamless horizon of space with the silent gusts of solar wind and bright stars reminded her that it was reality.

She checked behind her, Thane was aroused from his sleep. Shepard sighed and she scooted to the edge of the bed, placing her head in her hands in desperation.

Thane rubbed her back, tracing his hands along her spine. "Tell me what it was about."

"It's so . . . unsettling," she admitted. "I don't know what it all means."

"Maybe I can be of assistance, siha."

She rubbed her face and turned back to him, looking into his crystalline blue eyes. "I – I tried to save a child back on Earth. He was crawling through the air vents when Anderson and I were navigating through the wreckage to get picked up by the Normandy. I offered to help him, but when I turned my back to him for a split second when Anderson distracted me, the kid was gone.

"I've dreamed of him nearly every night since I watched his shuttle go down. He's haunted me, reminding me that there are countless other children experiencing the same fate." She clenched her teeth together to regain her composure. "And now, I saw myself go down with him in the flames."

He was quite for a moment. Shepard was sure he was always deeply thinking when he didn't say anything. Thane always has been a person to ponder things before he spoke. "There is a Drell saying: the dreams reflect what the dreamer truly feels, even if they do not consciously accept it. The subconscious is one of the most complex and adverse concepts, and even now we do not fully understand it. Sometimes it may even warn us of what is yet to unfold."

She tried to process what Thane was saying, but she couldn't understand what he was getting at. Was this dream her way of telling herself that she might not survive this war?

The thought was painful, and she pushed it away. "I appreciate your insight, Thane."

They kissed; it was simple and sweet, but too short for her tastes. The mission is at hand, they both knew this. It was what they were preparing for.

In the war room, Shepard watched the hologram of Cerberus' HQ as the Alliance's attack unfolded. Thane observed Shepard, wondering what she would say or do next. From behind them, EDI came in the door from the CIC. "Shepard, I should accompany you on this mission."

She didn't even peel her eyes away from the hologram. "Why?"

EDI advanced toward her. "This is the central point of operations for Cerberus. It will have advance security measures. With my knowledge of Cerberus algorithms, and this body's updated protocols, I offer you the best chance for you to succeed."

Shepard shifted her gaze from EDI to Thane, and then back to the hologram. He wondered what could possibly go through her mind at this moment. "Grab your gear," she said sternly, walking out of the War Room.

They had fought through the base, and Shepard was overwhelmingly happy that she had brought EDI along. They would have been suffocated to death back before they had launched the fighter jet at their entrance.

Another obstacle blocked their path, but EDI was already preparing her omni-tool to hack through the door. "Shepard, that console has not been fully scrubbed. It contains data that may find . . . interesting."

Shepard's brows mashed together as she accessed the console, bringing up numerous holovids. "What am I looking at?"
"Project Lazarus, your reconstruction."

Her finger hesitated over the button, and she decided to play the first entry log.

A doctor was talking to a projection of the Illusive Man. "It can't be done, it's not a matter of resources."

The man took a pull from his cigarette. "It's always a matter of resources. We're not losing Shepard."

"Sir, Shepard is clinically brain dead. With that much trauma, that long with no oxygen . . . we cannot overcome nature."

"Operative Lawson disagrees. She is now in charge of Project Lazarus."

Shepard was hunched slightly, the weight of the reality had hit her like a mako rolling over her. "I didn't realize it was that bad." Suddenly, she was overwhelmed with the thought that there was no afterlife. She had been dead, and there was no heaven or hell or purgatory. Just . . . nothing.

"I think it was meant to be, siha. The will of the universe works in strange ways. How are you holding up?" Thane said quietly behind her.

"I'm still me. I'm still the same person that I always was." Shepard said, more for herself than anyone else. "Or maybe I'm just this high tech VI that thinks its Commander Shepard . . . but I don't know I-"

"From what I gather, they wanted you back exactly how you were," Thane interrupted her, as well as reassuring her. "A VI would not compensate for Commander Shepard, the hero of the Citadel, savior of the galaxy. You are an icon, and no amount of machinery, no matter how advanced, can replace that."

"Yeah, you're right . . . thank you," she whispered, thankful Thane was here.

She played the next vid, curious and frightened to what she might find.

"Degeneration is proceeding," the same scientist told the Illusive Man. "The helmet kept the brain intact, whatever good that will do."

"Lawson will find a way."

"Sir, you realize that Shepard is an Alliance veteran. A Cerberus op wiped out her entire squad," he sounded almost afraid.

"Shepard is a soldier. She knows the Reapers are the real threat. She'll work with us." In comparison, the Illusive Man seemed very certain that his whole project and Shepard's outcome will go as he planned.

The holovid ended.

"He thought he knew you, Siha. He thought he could use the Reapers as a way to get you to work with him," Thane concluded.

Shepard stared at the terminal. "He was wrong. Every fiber in my body told me not to trust Cerberus. But I needed their help. They were the only ones that gave a crap about the real threat, the only ones that believed me." She drew in a deep breath. "So I played along."

"No one blames you for your course of actions, Shepard. You did what was necessary to stop the Collectors," Thane reminded her.

The last vid pulled up on the console. This time there was an additional scientist. The doctor in the previous vids sounded hopeful. "Project Lazarus is showing signs of neurological activity. They're requesting more funding."

The Illusive Man was all too eager to spend his credits. Wealthy bastard. "Granted. Get me our potential recruits file. Shepard will be up soon, we need a crew."

The female doctor interjected. "Our existing forces should be more than sufficient."

"No," Illusive Man disagreed. "We need sympathetic faces. I need Shepard invested. Tap Kelly Chambers and contact Dr. Chakwas along with Shepard's pilot."

The vid ended, leaving Shepard fuming.

"That almost seems . . . unethical. It is as though they wanted you to be comfortable and not see the true side of Cerberus," Thane shook his head.

Shepard swallowed harshly. The whole damn thing put a bad taste in her mouth. "How's that door coming along EDI?" She asked, trying to move on.

The door's interface changed from orange to green. "We are clear to proceed."

Author's Note: I am so sorry, it has almost been a year since I last updated this. I apologize profusely, I feel horrible that I haven't finished this story. But I am currently working on the Kai Leng boss fight and it's going to be bad ass, so stay tuned. Thank you so much for sticking with me until the end, I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoy writing it.