A/N

This is my first attempt at a Lupin/Tonks story, even though they have been my favourite characters since the third and fifth book… anyway, this is a small one-shot that can fit into 'Half-Blood Prince', where Harry and Dumbledore arrive at the Burrow and find Molly and Tonks there, talking. I would have loved to have been able to read it from their perspective, what they were discussing etc. so I thought no harm would come from writing what I think happened.

This is about Lupin & Tonks but of course is using the characters of Tonks and Mrs Weasley so apologies if you came to this story expecting Remus to magically turn up at the door.

Disclaimer: All characters, settings etc. belong to the wonderful JK Rowling who gifted us with such an imaginative magical world when I was growing up. Towards the end of this story, I include lines from the book itself and I am in no way passing it off as my own, all lines from when Dumbledore appears belong to JK Rowling.

Hope you enjoy!

A loud crack split the silence that surrounded the Burrow. As Nymphadora Tonks strode forwards, kicking stones in her wake, she spotted Molly Weasley appear at the kitchen window in the distance. In response to her watchful gaze, Tonks pulled her cloak tighter around her and pushed forward, in the hopes of doing her job quickly and getting home so she could sit and mope for the evening.

She knew Molly was scrutinising her as she drew closer to the back door and made an effort to mask her face from the intense gaze. She reached the door and paused for breath. She would not give anything away. She would tell Molly what she was instructed to and leave. She would not break down. With that mantra in mind, Tonks knocked on the door.

"Who is there?"

The voice on the other side of the door was warm, yet timid and Tonks almost smiled. Molly saw her walk down the path and still had to ask who it was.

"It's me, Tonks," she replied, her voice hoarse.

"Who or what is your worst enemy?"

Tonks didn't even think on it.

"The troll leg umbrella stand."

The door swung open immediately and Molly stood in the opening, wrapped in a worn green dressing gown, gazing at the young woman before her with a frown. Tonks immediately pulled her arms in front of her and absently picked at a thread in her cloak, her eyes downcast. She knew what Molly saw in front of her. She saw it every time she looked in a mirror in her flat. Her hair was mousy brown and hung limp around her heart-shaped face. She was overly pale, a lot paler than usual and her clothes hung from her thinner frame. When Molly's eyes reached her own, Tonks forced the ghost of a smile to her lips.

"Wotcher Molly."

Molly smiled in return and, despite the circumstances, it lit up the gloomy night. Mrs Weasley had that aura about her, motherly and warm, even in the darkest of times that they now faced.

"Tonks, dear, in you come, in you come."

She bustled Tonks in, shooing her to the kitchen table. Tonks resisted for a moment, not wishing to appear rude but not wanting to stay either. She turned to Molly and said smoothly;

"Dumbledore has sent me with a message. He'll be apparating here in the morning with Harry, who will be staying for the rest of the summer."

Molly nodded and appeared delighted with the news. Tonks took it as her cue to quietly depart and started to move back towards the door. She didn't get far before Molly accosted her.

"Won't you at least stay for a drink? You haven't been around in a long time."

"Sorry but no thanks Molly," Tonks replied wearily, forcing another smile, "I've been kept very busy by the Ministry at the moment. Aurors are stretched thin and I've taken on extra work."

She thought the excuse would be enough. However, just as her hand clasped the handle of the back door, she heard a sharp tone from behind.

"Sit, Nymphadora."

Tonks didn't even have the strength to scold Molly for the use of her first name. As it was, she couldn't even muster a glare. Molly saw this and she softened slightly.

"Please, I can see you're troubled. Just a cup of tea."

Just one drink and then get out. Tonks resigned herself to a seat at the kitchen table, cloak still around her shoulders, determined to make conversation hard for the Weasley mother. Molly didn't deserve ill treatment from her, but quite frankly she was on the verge of a break down and to do so in front of Molly would be horrific.

Mrs Weasley didn't hear the inner monologue of her guest and instead hummed to herself as she bustled about the kitchen making tea for them both. With a final flourish, she waved her wand and the tea landed perfectly on the table. Tonks nodded in gratitude and wrapped her hands around the mug, glad for something to occupy her. Molly sat down opposite and didn't even bother with social niceties.

"Something is wrong."

"Nothing is wrong," Tonks immediately replied, glancing up into Molly's searching eyes before focusing her attention on the sugar bowl on the table in front of her.

"I've raised seven children, Tonks. I know when I'm being lied to. Now something is definitely wrong. Why won't you tell me?"

Because you wouldn't understand. No-one knows.

"Sirius is dead," the words tumbled out of Tonks' mouth easily, forming what she considered to be a good cover. Of course she was more than upset that Sirius had died, he was one of her favourite relatives, and she felt suitably guilty that Bellatrix Lestrange managed to knock her out. If she had fought just that little bit longer, she could have prevented Sirius' needless death. However, while this all weighed heavily on her heart, it was an even heavier burden for someone else, someone who in turn was causing Tonks' more heartache-

"Yes, he is. I know it's a lot to take in and there is plenty of time to grieve," Molly replied sympathetically, "but judging from the look in your eyes and your lack of appearance around certain Order members, I must wonder whether it is the death of Sirius that is in fact troubling you."

Tonks schooled her expression well and blew on her cup of tea gently before taking a measured sip. What should she say? Molly was looking at her closely and Tonks was almost certain that the older woman knew everything. How do I play it now? Molly answered the question for her.

"I would even go as far as to say, Tonks, that you look just like I did in my last year of school when Arthur and I took a short break in our relationship."

Tonks remained silent.

"I was heartbroken, really," Molly pushed on now with more confidence.

Tonks stood up abruptly and knocked the table, spilling her tea. Molly waved her wand dismissively and the stain disappeared as if it never happened.

"It's nothing," Tonks said dully, "thanks for the tea Molly but I really have to be off."

Once again she walked towards the door, now determined more than ever to get out. Molly prying further would crumble the walls she had hastily erected before this trip and she had to get out before that happened. Best to get home and cry herself to sleep. That would solve it, at least for tonight.

Once again her hand was just skimming the door handle when Molly called out softly from her place at the table;

"Is it Remus?"

The name sent a tingling down Tonks' spine and her posture stiffened. She knew without looking over her shoulder that Molly's eyes would be glittering triumphantly. Tonks took a deep breath and felt her shoulders sag in defeat. Her hand fell loosely away from the door handle but she still did not turn back round.

"Have you ever thought of telling him how you feel?" Molly took the moment of silent admission to press home her advantage.

Tonks slowly pivoted on the spot, looking Molly squarely in the eye. She refused to cry, it would be stupid and futile and- she felt a lone tear escape down her cheek. Traitor! She screamed at it, feeling the burning trail it left behind. She focused on Molly's question to distract attention away from it.

"I have tried," she replied, her voice monotone and defeated, "five times now."

Molly looked confused and so Tonks took the opportunity to move back to the table and sit back down with her now cold cup of tea. I might as well make a night of itif it is all coming out now anyway, she thought as she removed her cloak.

"If you've told him..." Molly said, genuinely puzzled, "then what is the problem?"

Tonks let out a bitter laugh and fiddled with the sugar bowl.

"'I'm too old, too poor, too dangerous'" she mimicked derisively, quoting what was now sure to be burned into her memory forever as the worst excuse possible.

Molly was silent for a moment, taking in the excuse, before she scoffed loudly at the entire debacle.

"Too old? well he's hardly in his grave! Who gives a fig about money these days? And as for too dangerous, well ..." she could hardly finish her sentence, the excuse was so preposterous to her, "he's never been a danger as long as I've known the man!"

Tonks lightened a bit at Molly's tirade against Remus. She wasn't the only one it seemed who found the excuse to be lame and unoriginal.

"-that man is too damn noble for his own good sometimes!" Molly continued on, her cheeks flushed in indignation, "he constantly puts himself down and thinks himself a monster because of his condition! No self-esteem whatsoever! He needs to pull his head out of the ground and see that others care for him and he deserves to be loved!"

"What do I do?" Tonks cut in, her voice laced with desperation, "I can't take it, I really can't! He keeps rejecting me and refuses my counter-arguments. Hell, we can't be alone in the same room anymore! He won't let me change his mind on the matter, but I have to Molly, I just have to somehow. It's not just a crush. Why can't he see that?"

Tonks pulled at a lock of her hair and screwed up her face in concentration, intent on changing it to her usual bubblegum pink. Remus likes it pink... She opened her eyes and saw it, mousy brown and limp just as before.

"I can't change like I used to," she explained, gaining a look of sadness from Molly. Tonks then drew her wand out quickly and pointed it at the far side of the kitchen. She sought out a good memory; last Christmas where she had mistakenly stumbled and crashed into Remus, who caught her and pointed out the mistletoe above them. His soft lips on hers...

"Expecto Patronum!" She cried out and a large silver animal burst from her wand. She heard Molly gasp in recognition.

"Oh Tonks," Molly whispered softly, her heart obviously breaking for the young Auror.

Tonks sighed and watched sadly as the silver wolf slowly dissolved into nothing, leaving emptiness, both in the kitchen and in her very heart.

"You see?" she said, her voice breaking as she looked over at Molly.

Molly reached her hand out across the table and clutched Tonks'.

"I never knew, dear, the extent…"

"I bet everyone thinks it's just a girly crush, I wish it was," Tonks replied miserably, "I wish I could get over him and I hate that he has affected me in this way!"

She tugged at a lock of limp brown hair and Molly cocked her head in sympathy, relinquishing her hold of Tonks' hand. Tonks folded her arms on the table and dropped her head into them. Molly felt helpless as she watched the young auror's body start shaking, no doubt releasing the frustrated tears that were long overdue.

"Somedays," Tonks' murmured, her voice muffled by her arms as she wiped her tears on them, "I wish I never fell in love with him."

Molly clucked her disapproval at those words and walked over to Tonks, rubbing her shoulders consolingly. Her mother used to do it to her when she went through hard times with Arthur. Eventually the shaking faded away, leaving once again the tired, empty shell that was now Tonks. Molly's heart was breaking for the young woman.

"Never regret love, Tonks dear," Molly eventually said, "to have experienced it at all, especially in such dark times, is a blessing."

Tonks lifted her head up and gave a feeble smile at her words, which spurred Molly on.

"I know Remus," she continued, smiling back at Tonks, "he's a worthy man, very stubborn but he has the same flaw as the rest of us."

"A bad leg?" Tonks asked tonelessly. She had considered kicking the werewolf idiot in the shins on more than one occasion.

"No. Love. If he's asimportant to you as you are to him then don't give up. He'll come round eventually to the idea, how could he not?"

"Thanks, Molly."

"When he shows up at the Burrow next, I'll be sure to give him a piece of my mind."

Tonks felt the corners of her mouth pull up slightly. It wasn't much, but for the first time in weeks it was genuine. She gently reheated her tea with her wand.

"Or better yet," Molly continued, "you can, dear, he'll be round this-"

Three successive knocks at the door interrupted Molly's sentence and Tonks watched as the Weasley mother froze, her posture stiff and alert. Tonks gripped her wand tightly in her hand, unsure of what death eater would knock before entering to kill them but still ready for any possibility. Molly stopped before the back door, her voice shaking as she called out;

"Who's there? Declare yourself!"

A voice carried through the door, strong and familiar.

"It is I, Dumbledore, bringing Harry."

Molly visibly relaxed and threw the door open as Tonks loosened her grip on her wand, wrapping her hands back round her mug of tea.

"Harry, dear!" She heard Molly proclaim, "gracious, Albus, you gave me a fright, you said not to expect you before morning!"

Harry entered through the door first, followed by Dumbledore who amiably replied;

"We were lucky. Slughorn proved much more persuadable than I had expected. Harry's doing, of course. Ah, hello, Nymphadora!"

Tonks winced at her full name and quickly caught both Dumbledore and Harry's eyes.

"Hello professor. Wotcher Harry."

"Hi, Tonks." Harry replied, giving her a small smile. Tonks tried to return it, but felt it was more forced than ever. She felt uncomfortable in their company, especially as she noticed Harry taking in her appearance with a look of confusion on his face. Why was everyone so interested in her business? Couldn't she just have an off day without the strange looks? Feeling herself wither under the combined stares of both Harry and now Dumbledore, who was peering at her over his half-moon spectacles curiously, Tonks quickly stood up and grabbed her cloak.

"I'd better be off," She said, her attempt at casual coming out strangled. She fixed her cloak around herself and turned to Molly, "thanks for the tea and sympathy, Molly."

"Please don't leave on my account," Dumbledore cut in smoothly, his tone polite, "I cannot stay, I have urgent matters to discuss with Rufus Scrimgeour."

"No, no, I need to get going," She couldn't meet his eyes, she knew he could read her like an open book if she did. She wasn't ready for people to know about her problems with Remus, causing her to avoid the burning gaze of the Hogwarts headmaster, "Night-"

"Dear," Molly interrupted as Tonks made her way to the door, "why not come to dinner at the weekend, Remus and Mad-Eye are coming-?"

"No," Tonks replied quickly, understanding Molly's hint but she couldn't face him again, not yet, not when his last rejection was so strong, so recent, "really, Molly… thanks anyway…"

Molly gave a small nod of understanding and Dumbledore glanced between them both, his features schooled into a look of polite interest.

"Goodnight, everyone," Tonks murmured before walking quickly out of the Burrow. She hurried into the yard, not far from the back door and knew that they were watching her back. She stopped, took a deep breath and wiped a freshly formed tear from her cheek.

"Damn you Remus," she whispered into the air, allowing her anguish to be lifted up by the gentle breeze and carried away. With that, she turned and with a faint pop, disapparated into thin air. She left a troubled Molly Weasley in her wake, watching the spot where she had just disappeared, with a knitted brow and a frown on her face.

A/N

I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it, despite the fact that there was no happy Lupin/Tonks fluff. Reviews would be nice and feel free to constructively criticise, thanks