Okay. Seriously. I don't know why the hell I wrote this. I went to the wrong side of YouTube again. And listened to depressing music.

Without farther ado, here's your story.

Oh God…

Skulduggery hung up the phone, and placed it on the dashboard of the Bentley. Today had been a good day. Fantastic, really. He'd been able to stop more and more mortals from exposing magic, with their sudden uncontrollable bursts of fire, or flying, or whatnot.

He had told Valkyrie to stay at home today. She said the day previously, that she wasn't feeling well, and she took the day off.

Skulduggery had wondered about her. If she was okay, if she needed him…

But he didn't want to check up on her. She was a big girl, and it was probably just that time of the month. Or something like that.

But now, it was seven o'clock. Valkyrie's parents would have gone out to dinner, seeing as it was a Thursday night. Valkyrie would be at home, having the house to herself, probably watching Star Wars. As always. He parked the car on the kerb outside the house, and walked to the side, where her room was. Valkyrie's window light was on. Skulduggery lifted himself off the ground, and caught the ledge of the window, hauling himself up, to peer inside Valkyrie's room.

The window was open, so Skulduggery slid it up, and climbed in.

Her room was an absolute mess. Well, it was usually a mess, but that was beside the point. Valkyrie's lamp was on the floor, shattered. Drawers were open, all around the room. The full-length mirror was broken. The reflection was still in there. Her eyes had dark circles under them, and her eyeliner was running down her face. She had a gun in her hand.

Skulduggery felt the edge of the glass. His hypothetical stomach had dropped, and his hypothetical heart skipped a beat.

"Valkyrie!" he called out, running from the room. He searched every nook, every cranny, every room upstairs. Then, we went down a flight, and the first place he looked was the kitchen.

There was a piece of paper lying on the island. From this distance, Skulduggery could see Valkyrie's scribble. He dashed over, and picked up the paper, reading it.

Dear Mum, Dad,

I know this may come as a surprise, because you all thought I was fine. Well, you were wrong. I've been tortured, tormented, beaten and ripped. My soul has shattered into a million pieces. Tiny fragments which could never be put together. Those tiny fragments were making holes and slashes into my body, oozing blood. Darkness isn't there. Over the years, all light has faded from the world, turning everything black and grey. All I can see now, is darkness. I am darkness. It has consumed me.

I wasn't meant to be born. When I was, I unleashed a curse. You see, there is a man- a fantastic one at that. You've met him before, I think. His name is Skulduggery Pleasant. When you first laid eyes on him, you were cautious. He was enigmatic. He was dangerous… But over the years, he has been the closest friend I have ever had.

You see, I'm not the girl you once knew. Sweet, charming Stephanie Edgley. Well, okay, I'm still pretty charming, but nevermind that. Mum, remember the night the roads flooded, and I stayed at Gordon's? Well someone was sent to kill me. Someone dark. Evil. Skulduggery saved me from him that night. I stayed with him. He showed me a world- a different one than what you know. It is a world of magic- a world of wonder. Because I was involved with this world, I couldn't be at home all of the time. I made a reflection. She looks like me, talks like me, thinks like me. She has been in my place for the past five years.

Go on, I smashed the mirror upstairs. You can still see her there.

Anyway, Skulduggery taught me magic. He taught me how to fight. He taught me how to kick some ass. And because I was in that world, I also changed my name to Valkyrie Cain.

I've fought monsters. I've fought villains. I've saved the world more times than I can count. There are people out there, people who have threatened you with your lives, though you didn't know that. I can't stand it. Knowing that my enemies can use you all as leverage against me. It isn't fair to you.

On top of that, I have realized something about myself. Psychics all around the country, a few years ago, were all having premonitions of a woman. An evil sorcerer. Her name was Darquesse.

Darquesse is me. When I was twelve, a book fell in front of me. A book which has every person in the whole world's true names in it. ( a true name is something that gives you power). I saw mine. Of course, it didn't register, but I remembered.

I don't want to become her. I don't want the two of you, or Alice in danger. Gordon thought the same as me, I think. He was murdered because of magic.

Don't get me wrong, I love magic. Being in that world has brought out the best of me. But all magic comes at a price. For me, it is ending all of existence.

I can't do that.

So I have to end myself, before I end everyone and everything else.

But before I do, I just have some words.

Dad- I love you. I always have, and always will. You were my protector when I was little. You were so funny (and still are) whenever you forget something that is right in front of you. You were the most amazing Dad ever. More than I think you could ever know. And when you get the chance, talk to Fergus. He knows of magic. The stories you learned when you were little? All. True.

I love you dad. Keep living for me.

Mum- you are the most beautiful woman I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. You are amazing, inside and out. You've had to put up with me for the past seventeen years, and that takes real courage. You are so, incredible strong. Help Dad through this. He needs it. He needs you. Remember to love him, and to never let go.

Alice- You're too young to read, but you should be reading this when you're older. You were an amazing sister. I knew you for such a small time, but I think you were spectacular. I'll be watching over you. Like a guardian angel. Take my word for this- don't get involved with magic. If something were to happen to you, I'd probably die all over again. Please. Trust me. I love you.

Skulduggery- I know you're reading this. It's Thursday night, and my parents were out to dinner. You wanted to check in with me, see how I was doing. You thought I was probably watching Star Wars, because you know how much I love that movie. You probably broke into my window, and saw the reflection in the mirror. Yes, yesterday I told you that I wasn't feeling well. I just couldn't stand to see you. (No offense, you're cheekbones are pleasing to the eye …) but I didn't want to prolong it. I have to do this. You know of Darquesse. You have seen her take over me before. I killed people that night. True, they were possessed by Remnants, but people were still in there. We've been through thick and thin. We fought Nefarian Serpine. The White Cleaver. We fought Baron Vengeous. We beat the Faceless Ones, Billy-Ray Sanguine, the Grotesquery. We beat Remus Crux, Davina Marr, the Tesseract, the Torment. The Remnants. We've beaten Caelan, Dusk, an assortment of monsters, zombies, vampires, werewolves, goblins. We've beaten the Diablere, Nye, The Sea Hag, the infected, God knows how many Sanctuary Agents, Ian Moore, Hollow Men, Scarab, Ed Stynes, Bison Dragonclaw, Solomon Wreath, Anathem Mire, Scapegrace (although he really doesn't count), Murder Rose, Gruesome Krav, Moloch, the Jitter Girls, Melancholia, and, of course, us. Darquesse and Lord Vile.

Then there were all those times you saved me. Because I have a particular knack for lists (as seen above) you get to read this.

The time you saved me from the Baron.

When you knocked me out of the way of the werewolf.

Kept the Remnants from possessing me again.

Caught me after being thrown off a roof by Dusk

Punched Dusk a lot when he was about to kidnap me…

Helped me out of the Faceless One's dimension.

Stopped Sanguine from killing me when chasing Fletch

Beat up the man that attacked us twice the night we first met

Pulled me from the bullets in the Temple

Prevented the possibility of Nye operating on me again.

Probably something other that I've forgotten. But P.S. I've saved you a lot, too. So be quiet…

And do you know what? I wouldn't give it up for the world.

True, you dragged me into countless fights, near-death situations, resulting with me having to go and visit Kenspeckle more times than I could count, but…

Skulduggery, I love you. You're my best friend, my teacher, my mentor. You've had my back for all those years. You stuck with me. Just like I said at Croke Park. I save you, you save me. Every day. That's just how we work.

And unfortunately, you won't be able to save me this time. You knew this would happen someday. Please, don't blame yourself. It wasn't your fault. You can't always protect me. You said so yourself. I don't think I'll need it anymore. You know how dangerous I am. Every time I'm about to die, Darquesse takes over. We messed up half of Dublin last time that happened.

And please, look after my Mum and Dad. And whatever you do, do not, I repeat, DO NOT let Alice learn magic. Please. As a last request.

Tell everyone I love them. Make sure that Ghastly gets this- Nye's old workshop. When you step inside it, you die. When you die, the Remnant leaves you. Tell him that for me, he really needs her.

Again, dear. You really have made my life the best ever. I wouldn't have had it any other way. I think I already miss your laugh, your smile. And yes, I know, you're always smiling, skeletons do tend to do that…

Don't forget me. Keep me alive that way. And, you know, if you do forget me, I'll haunt you. I swear to God, I will haunt you.

…

Anyway, I don't think there's anything else really to say. Well, besides the fact that you can find me at our meeting spot, Skulduggery. No, wait, there are like, millions of those. How about this: I'll be where I told you about being Darquesse.

Yeah.

No mistaking that, now.

I love you all. Mum, Dad, Alice… Skulduggery.

~Valkyrie Cain

P.S…. Skulduggery, Echo-Gordon's behind the bookcase. Er, he had a spare stone that hadn't been used. I imprinted on it. I thought that maybe it would help.

See, I told you, you could never get rid of me…

Skulduggery ran. He ran, no, not for his life, but for Valkyrie's. He had to stop her. The reflection had been carrying a gun. Valkyrie had a gun. And she was at the pier. And she was going to kill herself to save everyone else.

Skulduggery ran down the back road to the pier. He ran over fallen trees, or boulders. He ran, because, somehow, a small part of him still believed that she had waited for him. She had waited to tell him good-bye.

His mind was racing. The clearing came in to view. He worked his legs faster, pumped his arms more, pushing his limits… Whatever they were.

He skidded to a halt at the end of the pier.

There she was. The great Valkyrie Cain. She had her back to him, and was staring off into the sea, at the setting sun. Skulduggery walked towards her. Her hair was pinned up. Instead of her usual work clothes, she had on a beautiful, strapless black dress. It had layers, gaining volume at the hips. Valkyrie had on black diamond earrings, and black lace gloves, that cut off at the middle of the fingers. And, of course. In her left hand, she had a revolver.

She turned around to him. "You came."

"Of course I did. You were going to kill yourself." Skulduggery murmured.

"True." She paused. "You left the note on the table, right?"

"Yes."

"Splendid."

"Why the dress?"

"Added drama. I quite like it, actually. What do you think?" she twirled in a small circle, the dress swirling around after her.

"You look stunning." Skulduggery said, taking a small step closer, hoping she wouldn't notice.

Skulduggery had been taking small steps closer to her, in an effort to grab the gun before she pulled the trigger on herself. He just had to be stealthy enough.

"Come now, Skulduggery. This is me, without my protective clothes. No identity. Completely," She twirled again. "Venerable. Your turn."

Skulduggery sighed, and unbuttoned the first part of his shirt. He tapped a few symbols on his bones, and his face retracted back into his skull.

"That's better." She said, smiling, then turned back to the sea, and sighed. "Valkyries. Warrior women of the Norse mythology. They carry the dead souls of soldiers off the battlefield, to Asgard, where they separate the souls into two groups. Half going to Freya's Hall, Sessrumnir, and half going to Valhalla, the warrior paradise. There, they would battle for the great battle Ragnarok. That's when the souls would join the gods, to fight the giants."

She scoffed. "A tad morbid, but who am I to judge. I've killed people."

Skulduggery reached forward, and was about to grab the gun, when Valkyrie whipped around, splaying her hand at him. She lifted Skulduggery off of the dock, and over the water.

Crying now, "You can't stop me."

Skulduggery struggled against the constriction that he was under. He was panicked. He wouldn't show it, but he was scared. Valkyrie Cain was the one thing in the world that scared him. And like hell, he was freaking terrified.

"Valkyrie, be reasonable." He tried.

"Or what." She said. "I am, Skulduggery. This is the only way to save the planet. And I know you. If it came to crunch time, you would've done it. I'm just saving you the pain of making the decision."

"Valkyrie, please. Don't do this to me." Skulduggery pleaded.

She squeezed her eyes shut, as fresh tears leaked from her eyes. "Don't do that. I hate it when you do that." Skulduggery gazed over her shoulder. He could see her parents, far off. They were running from the house, yelling for her.

"Your parents are coming." He informed her. Valkyrie nodded.

"As I suspected. But they don't know the meeting area. Only you and I do." Valkyrie smiled. "I have to do this, Skulduggery-"

"Valkyrie, don't-"

"-and you can't suffer about it-"

"Stop!"

"-this is my decision, and mine alone-"

"You can't do this to me!"

"I'm sorry," she whispered. She pushed her hand, and pushed Skulduggery out to the water, and under. From there, she pressed the current on him, trapping him underneath the water, long enough to buy time to pull the trigger.

Her body hit the dock.

Skulduggery heard it. From under the water, twenty feet awake, he heard it. It was sharp, loud. The water pushing down on Skulduggery dissipated. He worked quickly, and commanded the water around him to propel him forward. The dock was closer… And closer…

He sprung out of the water, flipped, and landed, sopping wet. He raised all the moisture off of his suit and flung it off of the dock, to the vast open water.

No, no, no…

He got down on his knees, and put his arms around her. His hand went to her face, and he cradled it. Her eyes were closed, and there was a trickle of blood coming from her temple.

So beautiful…

"Oh Valkyrie…" Skulduggery whispered. "My Stephanie, my Darquesse." His heart, right then and there, shattered. He looked at her neck. There was a silver locket on it. He opened it, and there was a small, folded piece of paper. Skulduggery unfolded it.

And gasped… How…

It had his given name, his taken name, and his real name on it. How Valkyrie had gotten a hold of this, Skulduggery had no clue.

But Valkyrie knew his true name.

And she never used it against him.

Skulduggery brought her cold body up to him, holding her for the last time. He put his hand on the back of her head, holding her to his shoulder. He was rocking her. He hadn't rocked anyone like that since he was holding his beloved dead wife and daughter. And soon, he was crying. Something he didn't even know he was capable of doing. But once the one drop slid over the rim of his socket, they just flowed. His shoulders shook uncontrollably. The pain inside of him burned. It was a fire set alight- the hurt from it was unbearable. It was in his chest, where his heart would be.

It was hurting for Valkyrie, this time.

Skulduggery saw her parents at the beginning of the dock, standing there, gaping. Desmond had his arm around Melissa. They looked shell-shocked.

Skulduggery bent over, and kissed Valkyrie's forehead. Then, he put his arm underneath her legs, lifting her up. He kicked the gun, furiously, into the ocean.

He turned, and walked down the dock, each step he took as hollow as him. He watched her, the whole way down, with some strange hope that it was all fake, or a hoax.

He reached Valkyrie's parents. He passed them their daughter. Melissa choked a sob, as tears glittered down her cheeks. Desmond laid their Stephanie in the grass, and cried over her.

Skulduggery staid for a few minutes longer, until he was unable to stay for any longer.

"Wait." A voice said- Melissa's. Skulduggery turned around, vaguely surprised. "Did you really save her all those times? Did you protect her?"

Skulduggery nodded. "Yes."

"Was she safe with you?"

He nodded again.

"Then at least she died with someone she loved."

Skulduggery turned, and walked down the path.

The funeral was a week later, in a cemetery. The guests had noticed in the cemetery that there was a beautiful house in the middle of it, with an exquisite car parked out front. But they shrugged it off. It was probably just the caretaker.

Everyone at the funeral noticed the others. There was a blonde woman, a blonde kid, a man with scars, and a few other oddballs. But there was one man that stood out. He had on a beautifully tailored pinstriped suit, gloves, and a large hat. The rest of the odd group had gone up to the girl, and said something to her, but he didn't.

And while most of the guests trickled away, the man stayed, head to the floor. They didn't know that he stayed there until everyone else was gone. Only then, did he step out of the shadows. No scarf, not glasses, no wig. Just as himself.

He went up to the girl, and placed something in her hand. He leaned over to her ear, and whispered just two little words, before kissing her forehead.

"Be brave."

The skeleton walked away, hands in his pockets, completely, and utterly broken.