I feel like I'm falling.

Which is weird, since I could have sworn I was on solid ground a second ago. I wonder if I was hit by a car or something? I know that the drivers around here take red lights as more of a suggestion than anything else, but there weren't any cars around. And besides, my body feels distinctly unbroken. A good thing, but doesn't tell me what the heck is going on.

Luckily, the world decides to give me a hint as to my situation. Unluckily, it does this by halting my falling sensation and replacing it with an impact. For a few seconds, I just lie where I fell. Whatever I landed on feels hard, like concrete. Maybe it was a car.

"Oh my gods, are you alright?"

I hear a voice somewhere nearby. Looks like I survived whatever just happened. Hooray!

I'm not sure. My arm stings a bit, but I don't seem to be too much pain. Thank you for your concern. That's what I would like to say, but all that comes out is "ughabluh." Looks like talking is out of the question, so maybe I should try moving. I roll onto my side, and then slowly sit up using my arm for support. Success!

Opening my eyes, I see that the concrete I thought I landed on was in fact a stone walkway of some sort.

"Oh thank gods, you're ok!" There's that voice again. I can hear it more clearly than before. It sounds like a girl's voice.

Looking over in the direction of the voice, it becomes clear that it is in fact a girl speaking. She's bent over me, with a concerned look on her face. Man, whatever just happened must have looked really painful for her to be looking at me like that.

"Strange, I haven't seen anyone dress like that in a while. Are you an outsider?"

A t-shirt and shorts is strange? What, am I in bizarre-o world or something? You don't exactly look normal either. For starters, she has long green hair flowing down to her waist. The color isn't that weird, I suppose. Hell, I dyed my hair green back in high school. The strange thing is that she has a ponytail tied up with what appears to be a snake. Panning down, her outfit also seems odd. It looks like a white vest with blue trim over a blue skirt, and detached white sleeves on each arm.

It must be some sort of cosplay. In fact now that I think about it, it looks kind of like…

"Sanae Kochiya, I presume?"

The look of concern on her face turns to one of shock. "How does an outsider like you know who I am?"

"That's a pretty distinctive outfit you got on there. And could you knock it off with the 'outsider' thing? It's great to be so in character, but it's getting annoying."

"What do you mean by 'in character'?"

"Well, it obvious that you're cosplaying as Sanae."

"Wow, it's been a long time since I heard someone use the term 'cosplay.' You really must be an outsider. And why would anyone be cosplaying as me?"

She gets a glint in her eye, and a smile creeps across her face.

"Is the shrine that popular in the outside world? Did people start to miss us after we came to Gensokyo or something? Do they want a comeback tour? Oh wow, Lady Kanako is going to flip when she-!"

It's an interesting sight; watching her take in information, process that information, and then produce a conclusion that couldn't be further from the truth. Either that or she is one crazy-ass fangirl. Probably the latter, considering the lengths she's going to actually act like a videogame character. And there's no way in hell we're in-

Actually, something seems off. Looking around, there are trees in every direction. And from the looks of their bright orange leaves, they're maple trees. Last I checked I was in Oklahoma, and we don't have many of those.

"Where am I?" I ask. Not something I want to have to ask because it means one of two things: 1) I hit my head harder than I thought, or 2) I've actually fallen into a parallel dimension that is supposed to be fictitious as a part of what I can only imagine is some story written by a writer who has run out of ideas. Please be option one!

The green-haired girl stops her fangirlish monologue and looks at me like I just asked what color grass is.

"Isn't it obvious? You're in Gensokyo. If you know who I am then you must know where this is."

Yeah, sure. Still hoping it's option one I say "I think I hit my head really hard. Does it look alright?"

The girl leans over to look at my head. In doing do, her breasts are right at my eye level. And I must say, it's a very nice view. Wait, now's not the time for that! Think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thoughts!

"It looks alright, but your arm looks like it got cut up when you fell. Nothing too bad though. Say, why don't you come to the shrine with me? Lady Kanako is definitely gonna want to meet you."

She holds out her hand, which I figure I might as well accept. As she helps me up, I notice that my arm does indeed have a fresh gash on it. Must have cut it on one of the stones I landed on.

I doubt I would have hallucinated a response that specific, so I guess I don't have a major head injury. Unfortunately, all of this means my mind is most likely working correctly. And that means that-

"I really am in Gensokyo, aren't I?"

"Didn't I already tell you that? And how do you know about Gensokyo anyway? I thought outsiders weren't supposed to know about it?"

That's…gonna be a hard one to answer. How do you explain that you know about someone's home because it's a fictional setting for a video game dreamed up by an alcoholic computer programmer?

"Let's just say I've heard of it, but thought it wasn't real. But from the looks of things, I guess I'm wrong?"

"Looks like it! This place is as real as any other."

We come to the end of the stone path and into a clearing. There's a few buildings scattered around, with one big one in the middle. I can't say for sure, but it does look like some sort of shrine.

Sanae walks over to one of the smaller buildings and opens a slide door and takes a step inside. Don't see a door like that too often. I guess I'm really not in the States anymore.

"Lady Kanako, can you come out her?"

"Sure, Sanae. What's up?"

"There's a guy from the outside world, and-."

I can hear footsteps rapidly approaching the door. I guess that got her attention.

After a few seconds, a smiling woman comes to the door. I recognize her immediately, but don't say anything. She's wearing an outfit that would make Lady Gaga do a double take. From the looks of things, she has on the brightest red t-shirt I have ever seen, with white sleeves extending out to her wrists. A flower-trimmed skirt flows down to her ankles. She also has purple hair that several times poofier than I would have thought was physically possible. So far so normal, right? Well, here's where things get crazy. Her shirt has an ornate mirror sewn over her chest. I have no idea what that's for. Maybe discouraging people from looking at her boobs or something? Regardless, the most outrageous part of her outfit is…actually I guess she's not really wearing it, but a large circular rope with zig-zaggy paper charms (I think they're called shide) hanging from it is just sorta floating behind her. I'm not sure how that works, but I'm pretty sure if I asked the answer would more or less be 'because magic."

She takes one look at me and says "Ah, yes. You do appear to be from the outside world. Please, come inside. Sanae, prepare some tea for our guest."

She returns inside, followed by Sanae. The green-haired girl takes off her shoes and leaves them by the entrance. I guess I better do the same.

Walking inside, it becomes clear that this is their house. I follow the purple-haired woman a few feet down a hallway to what I suppose is the living room. It's rather large, a square room at least twenty feet a side. There's a low wooden table in the center of the room. To be honest that's all I noticed about the room until I see what's against the far wall.

"Uh, sorry to ask, but is that a flat screen TV?"

The purple-haired woman turns to me and lets out a chuckle.

"My, you are an outsider, aren't you? Yes, it's a television. My shrine maiden, the girl you were just with, grew so fond of it that I decided to bring it with us when we came to Gensokyo." She motioned towards the table. "Please, have a seat."

I sit down at the table and cross my legs. The purple-haired woman sits down across from me just as Sanae enters the room carrying a tray with three cups of tea. She sets the cups on the table and sits down herself.

For a moment, they both sit there staring at me. I have the urge to say 'I know I'm handsome, ladies, but one at a time plea-' Ok you know what, sex drive? You and me are going to have a chat when this is over. You need to control yourself.

After…that short thought process, I realized that they were waiting for me to drink some of the tea. Of course! How could I have not realized that? Now I've never liked tea very much, but I'm not going to refuse their hospitality. I take a sip and oh sweet nectar of the gods.

"This is magnificent" I say while staring at the cup in my hands. I think I'm in love. Can you marry a beverage? I hope so.

'Thanks!" chirps Sanae with a huge smile on her face.

"I suppose I should introduce myself," the purple-haired woman states. "I am Kanako Yasaka, goddess of the Mo-"

"Oh don't worry. He knows that already. He says he even knows who I am."

Kanako and I both turn to look at Sanae. Girl, did you just cut off a god?

"What do you mean?"

"Well he said he knows who I am, about the shrine, and about Gensokyo and everything."

"Interesting. I thought outsiders didn't know about Gensokyo's existence," Kanako says, turning towards me, "so who are you and how do you know about this land?"

Oh, that's right. I've been talking for a while now and I haven't introduced myself. Don't you hate it when people just start talking and don't actually say who they are?

"My name is Ben, and I…guess I'm from the outside world."

Sanae looks at me with a puzzled face. "That's a funny name."

"It's short for Benjamin, which is derived from the Hebrew Binyāmîn. It roughly translates as "Son of the Right Hand of God."

Now she gets really confused. "Huh? Which god?"

"I think he means the single all-powerful God some religions have."

"Yeah, that's right. Anyway, I'm a college student from the United States."

"Really? Interesting..." Kanako seems intrigued by this. "Ah, yes, the United States. Such an interesting country. You know, I travelled there once."

Sanae and I are both surprised by this. "Really, Lady Kanako?"

"Yes, it was a few decades ago, a few years after the war."

"Which w-" I stop myself. I know what war she's talking about. "That war."

Kanako sighs. "Yes, that war. I felt like seeing the nation that turned my home country to rubble."

I scratch the back of my head sheepishly.

She grins. "Oh, don't worry about it. It's not like I hold a grudge or anything. That's just how it goes in war. But that's beside the point. So, how does someone like you know about Gensokyo?"

Well I know it as a fictional land from a videogame series called Touhou Project, many by Team Shanghai Alice, aka ZUN, aka Jun'ya Ota, aka an alcoholic computer programmer. The series gives extensive information about Gensokyo, its history, and its residents (which is why I was able to recognize you two)…

"Well I-" is all I can say before we all hear the front door slide open. We simultaneously turn our heads towards the sound.

"Bring that motherfucking outsider here at once!" I hear a man yell. "We know he's in there!"

Another man's voice responds. "That's it; I'm dragging him out here!"

I hear footsteps move towards the living room. A white blur passes by the door, then comes back and stops in the doorway. It's a guy in his mid-20s with silver hair and dog (wolf?) ears and blood-red eyes aimed right at me. For a moment we just stare at each other. He bares his clenched teeth, showing off some very sharp fangs.

"YOU," the man/wolf growls. Yes, I am indeed me. Thanks for notic…

At this point he lunges straight at me, hands aiming for my throat. I'm pretty sure Kanako is saying something right now, but I can't make out the words. All I can focus on is his eyes, looking at me with an expression of pure rage. I wonder what pissed him off so much. Rabies maybe? It turns out I was wrong about him aiming for my throat. I can't say exactly how I know this, but it may have something to do with his hand curling up into a fist and slamming into my jaw.

Oh, wow look at all the colors. There's this green blob. And a purple blob. And even a red blob! So many pretty colors! And they're all moving around me. Or am I moving around them? It doesn't matter because this is so fun! And look, there are a bunch of black and white blobs! And…where'd they go? All I can see is a big brown blob that

"What do you think you're doing?"

Huh? What? I look around. I'm lying face down on the ground. Looking around, I see at least a dozen people standing over me. They all look like that one guy, but some of them have black hair. And they're all looking in one direction. Guess I better see what's so interesting.

It's a girl. She's got wolf ears, silver hair, a tail, and a big-ass sword. And she looks pissed.

"Stop staring and start talking. What are you people doing?"

The same guy who attacked me responds. "It's him! It's the murderer!"

Wait. Did he say "murderer"? No way. They have no idea what they're talking about. There's no way-

The girl looks unimpressed.

"I'm fifty feet away from him and I can tell he's not the guy. Scent's not right."

"But he has to be! I-"

Kanako, who must have been watching from the house, angrily cuts him off.

"Excuse me. I don't know who you're looking for, but according to Miss Inubashiri this young man is not him. And besides, I don't appreciate you barging into my house and assaulting my guest. Please leave."

"But-"

"OUT!"

Note to self, do not piss off gods.

After a moment of silence, Inubashiri speaks.

"Alright, you heard her. Head back to town."

The guy just stands there for a moment, as if deciding whether or not to listen. In the end, he turns to glare at me and then begins walking away. The rest of the group follows.

After they've left, the girl walks over to me and holds out a hand to help me up.

"You ok?"

I grab her hand and pull myself up.

"I, uh, I think so." I dust myself off.

"Good to hear. Sorry about that. Everyone's been on edge since this morning."

Kanako walks over to us.

"Care to explain why those tengu just broke into my house and attacked my guest Momiji?"

Momiji sighs. "Three villagers were found murdered this morning. The Daiichi family."

Kanako seems unimpressed. "So? They're youkai. Why don't you just wait until their life energy restores?"

"Well, that's the thing. We can't detect any of it."

This seems to catch the god off-guard. "You what?"

"Exactly what I said. It seems whoever killed them also sealed their life energy and took it with them. Also, the killer's scent seemed strange, so we think it was an outsider."

"The scent was strange? What do you mean?"

"Kanako, I'm a white wolf tengu. My sense of smell is better than almost anyone in Gensokyo. And the scent didn't smell like anyone I've ever come across."

"So why did they come to my shrine?"

"Someone said they saw a strange-looking person heading towards the shrine, word spread quickly-"

"And they organized a mob?"

"Exactly." She puts her hands together at her waist and bows. "On behalf of the tengu village, I'd like to apologies for their actions."

Kanako lets out a chuckle.

"Hey don't say it to me, he's the one that got the worst of it," she says, gesturing towards me.

Momiji turns to me and bows again. "I'm deeply sorry for the trouble they've caused you. Please don't hold that against them. The villagers are usually very friendly" Then she looks up at me, practically begging for forgiveness. I scratch my cheek nervously.

"Hey, don't worry about it."

Her eyes gleam. "Really?"

"Yeah. I mean, if someone killed my friends I'd be out for blood too."

"Oh thank gods!"

"Thank gods indeed" Kanako says with a smirk. I'm not sure if it was an actual prayer or a figure of speech, but she seems to get a kick out of it regardless. "Now if you will excuse me, I need to get back to my shrine. If everyone is as upset as that mob then I'm going to have a busy day."

Momiji seems alright with this. "Ok, I'll head back to the village." With that, they both part and start to go their separate ways.

"Why don't I go with you Momiji?"

Momiji stops in mid-stride and turns back towards me. "Huh?"

"Well, I don't want to get in Kanako's way at the shrine. And you think that killer was an outsider, right? Well maybe he left some clue that an outsider like me could pick up on."

She looks down and puts her hand to her chin, considering the offer. Her ears start twitching a bit. Does that mean she's thinking? Either way, that's adorable.

"Ok, that sounds good. I'll let you have a look. Just be warned, it's not a pretty scene."

"I'll be fine. Do you have any idea how much CSI I watch?"

"C-what now?"

"Never mind. So, which way's the village?"

She sticks her thumb over her shoulder. "I'll show you the way."

With that, we both leave the shrine grounds onto a steep staircase. I guess this is where I first dropped in. Actually, I still have no idea what the heck I'm doing here. I should probably look into that as soon as I'm done helping Momiji. I wonder who I should ask.

"So what's your name?" Momiji's voice snaps me out of my internal monologue.

"Oh, uh, Ben. Name's Ben."

"Huh. That's a funny name."

What's going on here? Why is Ben in Gensokyo? Will this story become anything more than a shallow author insert? Find out next time!