Willows Pov.

The spell called for an hour to work, and for me not to touch anyone for that time period. I did it at 6:30 so at 7:30 it should be finished.

The spell is for me to find and bond with the one that I am to be with. Even if Tara says that I'm for her I want to be sure. I know that I'm not in my right mind when I was Oz the other day with that woman werewolf. I just did not want to be hurt once again. I really want to be with Tara for all of time.

There was a knock at my door. I forgot for just a second that I just did a spell. I opened the door and got hugged by Xander. I look at the clock, 7:31, I did it. Even when hugging my friend.

We chatted, he left and I had class.

Before I left, I looked at the book one more time. It claims that I will have a pull at the time of the ending of the time. I felt not a thing. This is just not right; I look at the small print:

"The start of time is when you finish the spell. One will find that if you touch another within the time limit, the spell will be transferred. This spell cannot be taken back every. Once you have placed the spell on yourself or another, it cannot be given to another."

I look at the first line again… I finished that spell at 6:30 right….Crap.

Xander's Pov.

When I hugged Wills I felt a pull. I don't know what it was but it was something I put as magic and shrugged. It was Wills and magic. It had nothing to do with me.

We talked and talked. I can only do this in the mornings. Then I go home, sleep, wake, go to work, patrol, then its right back here. It seems that I have nothing to do but what I have to survive. I do nothing but what the "slayer" wants me to. I don't like her but I have to live with her because she is going to save the world and I want to help.

When I get done with Willow, I leave. We really don't talk about much but I need her to be balanced. I get into my car. Its cheep and old but she is mine. Most people have a diary but I have my car. I know that if she talked she would be my best friend. Yeah even more so then Wills.

When I passed the cenematry, I wanted to go in. There was just this tug at my stomach and me being a man of the stomach I went in. I kept going until I came to a crypt. I knew who lived in there but I could not stop myself. I went into it. I looked down the hole and saw Spike with Heather. Something in me broke. I ran as far as my car, got in, and drove. It was all I could to stop the image.

I got home, slept and went to work, day after day, for a year before I quit. I could not stand watching and knowing that Spike with Heather then Buffy.

I went to Willow and gave her something I bought that would not open until I was no longer in this world. To a point I can't wait. To be nothing and no to be in pain. He is to never know that I want him and he will be happy. This is the last day for me. I can't wait.

Spike's Pov

I was just standing there watching the watcher and the slayer fight out whatever they're arguing about this time.

I felt a slight pain in my wrist and feel liquid poor from it. I look down, nope no blood.

Red pops in real fast. "Have any of you seen Xander?"

"Sorry, pet, I have not. Nor have those two. Why?"

"He came by and gave me this." She says as she shows me a box. I know that box, it a secret keeper box. I can't be open unless the owner is dead. "When he left, I looked up what this box is and it is not good."

"I know what that box is. I don't think that the doughnut boy is going to do something bad."

"Can you go see for me? I can't go to his place."

I grab my trench coat and out the door I went. Why can't that boy stay out of trouble?

By the time I get to his place, I feel strangely sluggish. It feels like I have little to no blood in my body, what little blood I do have anyway. I get to his door and nock. He does not answer. I push on the door and a shock to me is that I was not pushed back. I open the door and I went right though. I smelt the blood. The smell hit me hard. Normally when I smell it I go crazy. Now all I want to do is stop it.

I went to the bathroom, which is where I can smell it strongly. I open the door to see the one thing that I don't ever want to see again. Xander in the tub filled with water and his blood seeping out.

The only consions thing that was running through my head was 'save him, he is mine; I have to save that is mine.' Pulling him out of the tub, grabbing shirts, put them around the wrist, grab the duct tape and made sure the shirts stayed. I look at the boy, this boy that wanted to die. I don't know why, but it hurt my unbeating heart.

Willow came over when I called her and told her that it was safe to do so. She came in and saw him. I watched her cry, and cling to his hand. That same hand that I was holding when it was just us two. The jealousy just rolled off of me. She left and told me that she and the crew would be there tonight. I did not want them here. I want to be with him by myself.

I wondered when I started thinking about him that way. I might have been when I was trapped down here with him for a few weeks. I wanted to kill myself and he was more than willing to help me out. That pissed me off that I made fun of him when I got the chance.

I also wanted to show him that I can do things. I learned how to use a washer and dryer and even the microwave. I did not do it for him I clamed but so I can do it for myself. In my mind I did it so that he can see I can do something.

The whole day I sat there looking at him and trying to figure out why him dying and killing himself hurts me.

The rest of the gang came over promptly at 6. I have a feeling it was the watcher that made them come at that time.

"How is he doing?" Red asks me. I shrug, he did not even move.

"Ok, does anyone know why Alexander tried to kill himself?" Asks the watcher. If the watcher has to ask then no one will know. It is that simple.

"I might." We all look at Red. I know that we all had the 'explain' look on.

"A year ago to this day, I did a spell. The last rule of that spell is not to touch another person for an hour. The minute to the end of the hour came and so did Xander and we hug. When we did it was a minute after but I have a feeling that we connected at the exact time. He ended up with the spell."

"Willow what was the spell?" The watcher asked. I look at him and behind him is the slayer. She looks as if this is not where she should be, as if this is not important.

"Soul bound spell." Red answered.

"Willow!" Ouch, even I shuddered. He is pissed.

"Explain that spell." I said.

"It is a spell that bonds the two souls that are sapost to be together. It is not a dark spell but it is not a white on either. If a person finds the bonded then they are to be together. If they do not come together the one with the spell on him/her will die. It usually happens within a few months not a year. I have a feeling that Xander tried to push it off. It also seems that he knows that person that fate has granted for him and has done nothing about it."

"Whoever it is, we can tell them right? It will make it better. He will live. Right?" I look at Red, the one who asks. Then at the watcher.

The watcher shakes his head. "I'm sorry but it looks like Alexander wants nothing to do with is bonded. I don't know if the bonded has another or if they had said no."

Whoever it is stupid because that boy is the most loyal and honest person on this stupid planet.

Everyone left but me. I have no place to go and I don't want him to be by himself when he wakes up. I don't know when it started but I started to talk to him. It went from random things to my life growing up to why he needs to wake up. I don't know how long I was talking but I do know that this is what I want to do.

Day after day the watcher came over with pills and drinkable fluids for Xan-pet to eat, and then he would leave. Red comes over whenever there is time for her to come. The stupid blond has never come to see Xander.

Red, when she is here, will make me blood and make me shower. She wanted to talk to my Xan-pet on her own. She asked me why I call him Xan-pet and I told her that I would until he wakes up. I told her I was hoping to piss him off enough to make him wake.

Two months have passed; his parents have not bothered me. The watcher comes and leaves, Red comes at least once a week and still nothing has happened.

I sit here and talk to him, read to him and just sit here. Sometimes I sing. I don't mind what I do the only thing I want is for my Xan-pet to wake up.