Author's Note- I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I'm going to. When I finished writing this, I really didn't want to publish it because it's awful. No, that's not being modest; this is the worst piece of written work I have ever read. But I said I would, and I try to deliver. So I'm going to ask (with a hint of begging) you to read this with caution. If you don't have much tolerance for bad writing then I wouldn't read this. If you do, please be kind and don't use capslock to express your utter hate for this, Monster, me and My Little Pony. Especially My Little Pony. Don't want to hear it. Now that that's out of the way and the rest of you are still here, let's get started! And may Celestia have mercy on me for putting you through this, you brave soul, you.

Monster: Alternate Ending

This was it. Zelda, Link, and the Hero stood in the depths of the Temple of Time, staring down Majora- the fallen goddess of incomprehensible who stood ready to unleash her vengeance on Hyrule for the Hero's interference so many centuries ago. Violet energy crackled at her fingertips as she stared down the trio with the smirk of a person on a power trip.

The moments ticked by as each party warily looked at the other, visually probing for a weakness in the other. Sweat beaded and dropped down necks, eyes squinted and blinked rapidly, breath came hot and fast. With every passing second, the tension multiplied as each awaited for the other to make their move… or make a mistake.

Finally, the tension snapped. With a bloodcurdling cry, Majora sped towards the hero's with terrifying speed. All three flinched for a moment, even the Hero, alarmed by the unnatural speed and the ferocity of the battle cry. Equally quickly, they recovered (Zelda was a moment slower) and they raised their collective weapons, ready to meet the ancient demoness.

A noise filled the air, stopping everyone in their tracks. It was almost comical, seeing the three standing with weapons raised, facing the power-charged goddess in the air. No one laughed; however, as they all strained their ears to listen for the noise that echoed around them.

Vroooosh…. Vroooooosh

In the small space that separated the conflicting enemies, a shape began to coalesce. The first thing to appear was the bright, flashing light standing at the same height as Majora's twisted head; it was quickly followed by the edges a tall rectangle painted a brilliant, deep blue. A moment later a line of text over the doors became legible-

Police Public Call Box

Finally, the box fully materialized, ten feet high and four feet broad. The trio's view of Majora was blocked by the box, which left them all confused when they heard a painfully loud creak, and the subsequent flash of violet light which made them all flinch. "Ms. Sparkle!"Avoicecriedout in surprise. "Was that absolutely necessary?"

"Excuse me Doctor, but that… thing, whatever it was didn't exactly look like it was going to welcome us with a gift basket!" The voice that responded was female, breathless with adrenaline and holding a slight overtone of irritation- probably more in spite of the ordeal then the rebuke.

Zelda and her two companions looked between each other with equal mixtures of surprise, confusion, and the barest hint of humor. The short exchange was enough to indicate these two strangers were very familiar with each other. Humor was drowned out quickly by guard against the inexplicable appearance of the blue box, and three weapons were readied once more. While they had looked between themselves, however, the voices had continued.

"Well most aliens look that way. Never know if they're going to greet you or kill you, BUT either way that doesn't mean we go around zapping them!" The first voice, which they had heard called "Doctor", was decidedly male, with a strange accent. He spoke with a distracted certainty that made it clear he knew what he was talking about; even though he was chiding the other stranger, there was no malice or even frustration in his voice, only a hint of surprise accompanied by warm familiarity.

"Sorry Doctor. I'm still not used to all these strange things we've been seeing. In Equestria a pony's intent was always rather clear." The second voice, "Ms. Sparkle", carried the same knowledgeable tone as the Doctor, but was colored with a note of defense at being a fish out of water. Once the irritation had quickly faded, her voice became bright and seemingly friendly, although a bit subdued for easily guessable reasons. An odd buzzing noise flicked on and off while she spoke, changing in pitch every time it resumed.

"Quite all right, I sometimes forget how peaceful your society is compared to humans. Hmm, the sonic is getting some rather strange readings. Whatever this is, it seems to be extremely powerful." Link slowly crept to the edge of the box and looked around the edge. When he looked back his expression was even more confused than before to the point of dumbfounded. All he did was beckon the other two to his side. Once they did, they were both equally struck with shock.

Two figures stood over the crumpled form of Majora, their expressions obscured by the angle and glaring light coming from the interior of the box. Both, however, were strange in every sense of the word. They stood on four legs like horses, and appeared to share other similarities like having manes and tails. One had a coat of violet with some sort of protuberance from its forehead, and the other was a more acceptable shade of brown while wearing a blue suit and holding some odd device in its mouth. This one seemed to have a more masculine build, so they guessed he was the Doctor while the other had to be Ms. Sparkle.

The Doctor turned and his eye caught the three staring and spit out the device in his mouth. "Ah, hello there!" He turned to fully look at them, showing his face which made them recoil even more. The face was an extraordinary blend of a horse's face with human expression. It would seem impossible were it not directly before them. Once they got over the strangeness of it, it was actually a nice face, warm, cheerful, and welcoming.

He continued, oblivious to their indecision. "I'm the Doctor, and this is my lovely companion Twilight Sparkle!" She smiled and waved slightly. "Terribly sorry about popping in unannounced like this, the TARDIS has been acting up a bit." He cast a furtive glance at the blue box. "I do hope we weren't interrupting anything."

The Hero was the first to regain his wits. "Well thank you for your, er, explanation. You did however interrupt a fight to determine the fate of this land against an ancient, enraged, fallen goddess, but it would seem your… companion… took care of that for us."

"See? I knew she was up to no good." Twilight exclaimed to the Doctor, pride coloring her voice.

"Yes, well, excellent for you Ms. Sparkle." He turned back to the Hero. "Fallen goddess you say? Doesn't quite seem like it by my observation." He turned back to Majora, drawing the device out again.

Confusion set upon the Hero's expression again. "What do you mean by that?" the Doctor didn't answer, but ran the device across the form of Majora several times.

Twilight spoke in his stead. "Sorry sir, he can be a bit inattentive sometimes." She said the words a bit louder than necessary, hoping to attract her friend's attention. When he remained intent on his own actions, she sighed and said louder. "AND RUDE."

"Hmm?" He finally looked up to see her staring down at him with an irate expression. "Oh, apologies." He stood and slid the device into the front pocket of his suit. "Yes, well this being is merely a Xoneph. A rather temperamental one at that."

The Hero stood no less confused and now exasperated. "A what?"

"A Xoneph. Picky beings from the Dawb system. Not normally seen outside of their home either, something must have driven it out. They're much like humans in ways, but they all have one rather odd characteristic. Each and every one of them-"he was cut off by a loud groan and bang from within the box. "Oh that's not good." He rushed inside without offering an explanation, Twilight following close behind.

"What? Hey wait!" Link and Zelda rushed inside after them, but the Hero did not follow. What was inside left them astounded for the second time in nearly as many minutes.

Inside the relatively small box wasn't the cramped space they expected, but an instead was a large room, shining blue and green. A metal grate staircase led up to a central platform where an enormous pillar stood, pulsing gently. All manner of buttons of knobs surrounded the column; so many that none of them could begin to grasp the purpose of them.

However, that didn't seem to be a problem for the Doctor. "Ms. Sparkle, flip paddle 4-b to position 5!"

"Position 5, got it!" Even Twilight moved with purpose around the controls, equally unfazed by the sheer volume of buttons. A violet glow surrounded a lever which then shifted down slightly. Something inside the clear column began to pulsate, and a groan echoed through the chamber. The Doctor moved around, pushing buttons and flipping levers haphazardly. Without looking up he shouted over the growing din, "Oi! Could one of you get the door?"

Zelda looked behind them and saw the door was indeed ajar, but the room outside looked… Extremely odd. Quickly she walked over and shut the twin doors with a cringing creak; when they closed the noise jumped and the chamber began to shake violently. Everyone grabbed hold of the closest handhold as the room bucked and quaked. The Doctor and Twilight whooped and laughed during the whole ordeal, unlike the two outsiders who tried to hold onto their stomachs.

Eventually the shaking began to subside, heralded by an irregular groan. Slowly the motion ground to a halt, jerking the inexperienced passengers to their knees with a final thud.

The Doctor and Twilight, who had smartly braced themselves for the arrival, were still smiling and giggling slightly, unmindful of the discomfort of their refugees. Twilight asked "So where are we now Doctor? A planet made that's a direct photo negative of Equestria? Or a nebula shaped like a horse's head?"

No, unfortunately nothing exciting this time around. The TARDIs didn't like wherever we went- something about the aura or whatnot. I felt it when we got out, it had a very strange feeling to it. But no matter now! So she made a re-centering jump: I suppose you could say she was "getting her bearings.' He looked at a screen hanging near them. "And it looks like that jump has taken us right back to your library."

"Why my library? I can't think of anything special about it. Well, nothing you would think is special about it."

"Nonsense Ms. Sparkle, I consider your library very remarkable! I mean for one thing it's built inside a tree, that's impressive in and of itself, not to mention that it is-"He was interrupted by a low groan, one of organic origin rather than machine. He looked over to see two figures leaned over in various positions of unconsciousness. "Oh… oops. Uh, Ms. Sparkle, we have a bit of a problem."

Her eyes followed the path of his, then widened. "Oh…"

Link and Zelda had begun to recover, and they were now starting to look around the TARDIS. Once the astonishment began to fade, a much easier task since this wasn't the first impression, their eyes were drawn back to the equines, their expressions somewhere between confusion and ire.

The Doctor looked at them for a moment before turning back to Twilight, a nervy smile on his face. "Well, Ms. Sparkle, this is going to be… Interesting." Twilight stared back at him, horror playing out on her face with an amused smile playing on the barest edges of her mouth. He turned back and gave a halting laugh. "Oh, very interesting indeed."

AN- Sweet Celestia that was atrocious. I mean seriously, that was the most horrifying piece of literature I've ever laid eyes on… and I wrote it.

(several tubs of ice cream and tears later)

Right, sorry about that. Well I guess of your still here then you still have some faith in me. Thanks Anyways, the final end of Monster is here. Again. You've all been wonderful, and you have my everlasting thanks for sticking with me through it. I hope you were able to find some enjoyment in this alternate ending, and I'll see you later!