Total Drama Ninja Warrior

Disclaimer: I do not own characters associated with the Total Drama series or do I own the show American Ninja Warrior or Ninja Warrior, which is called Sasuke in Japan. The Total Drama series is owned by FreshTV, and Ninja Warrior, or "Sasuke" is owned by the Tokyo Broadcasting Corporation and G4. My apologies if Harold starts acting like the human Wikipedia here.


It seems to be quite an ordinary setting these days. A quiet grassy scenery with a large pond that could fill thousands of water tanks and it had the length of a football field. But what surrounded this quiet field was heavy machinery that will test every challenger who dare challenge their limits to achieve greatness. It just happened to be something that was almost like a video game. Was this a dream or was this a nightmare? The rest of the 37 competitors were about to find out. A man, who looked very 30-ish, appeared on the camera after he was swinging some kind of metal rope.

"Whooooo! Welcome everyone, to Mount Midoriyama! The nightmare of full metal machine! Some say that it's a pipedream, an ordinary cakewalk. Well, my friends, right behind me, this is no cakewalk here! This is a contestant of endurance, a contest of skill and speed, it is a contest of all out madness. I'm your host, Chris McLean and the premise is simple, 37 contestants, 4 stages, but there can be only 1 winner! Who will survive? Who will lose? Who will become the first ever Total... Drama... Ninja Warrior?"

With this announcement, a bus is heard driving to the destination. As it stops, the familiar voices of the 37 competitors all looked at amazement of the huge metal mountain known as Mount Midoriyama.

"WHOO-HOO! Man, that's a big 'un!" said an almost familiar fat kid.

"Ohhhh man... I should've stayed home..." a certain gentle giant with a white cap on his head as he looked at the huge metallic mountainous structure with such fright.

"Hmmmmm... this shall be an excellent test... no hombre will touch my skills..." said a certain Latin ladies man as he looked at the entire Ninja Warrior course like it was a piece of cake. Of course, he was gonna realize that it wasn't.

As the rest of the contestants finally stepped out of the bus, they were surrounded by adoring fans of not only Ninja Warrior, but the fans of Total Drama as well. The place seemed to be packed. It was pretty much a Can-Japan crowd just to be a matter of fact. Chris McLean then greeted the contestants respectfully.

"Welcome to Total Drama Ninja Warrior!"

"Like anyone would care, McLame..." Duncan replied, just rolling his eyes annoyingly as he had Gwen in his arm.

"Oh, you would care, Duncan. Because what you see right behind me is a mountainous metal monster standing right before you at this very moment!" Chris exclaimed madlessly.

"Oooooh, yeah! Lightning likes a metal monster like that! No matter what size you try to throw at me!" Lightning exclaimed proudly, acting like the showoff that he was.

"Now that's what I call tough spirit right there." Chris commented slightly as he pointed right to a pumped-up Lightning. "Now just in case if you're not familiar with the rules of Ninja Warrior..."

"Duh, Chris... I already know what happens, I watch the show!" Heather exclaimed right out of pity.

"Fine, if you already know what happens, tell us..." Chris responded out of annoyance. He didn't like that he was interrupted by the Queen Bee herself.

"All right. There are four stages. Stage 1 includes Duodectuple Step, in which the competitor must step on 11 intermediate platforms in which each step is at a slightly different angle. Next up is the Cross Bridge, in which it's a bridge that rotates freely around a central lengthwise axis. It has four sections, two on each side, with each section 45° from horizontal. Then comes the Log Grip in which the competitor must hold onto a vertical log with their arms and legs while it slides down a track to the next platform. The log contains small indentations to provide some grip. Up next is the Jumping Spider in which the competitor must jump from a trampoline into a shaft of parallel walls that they must traverse by wedging themselves in between and crawling through. After that is the Halfpipe Attack, in which the competitor must run up across a vertical half-pipe. Then, they must make a leap from the half-pipe about halfway through to reach a rope to swing themselves onto a narrow landing pad. Next is the Warped Wall in which the competitor must scale a concave quarter-pipe by running up and grabbing the top of the wall in which it stands 5 meters in height and 20 centimeters. Then comes the Slider Jump, in which the competitor must slide down a track while hanging from a pipe. When at the end of the track, the competitor must jump from the pipe and grab onto a cargo net and either climb over or under the net. Then after that is the Tarzan Jump as they must use a rope to swing to a wall to the rope climb, and then they hit the buzzer so they can move on to stage 2. Any more questions, McLean?" Heather responded tiredlessly.

"Wow... nice explanation, Heather..." Chris said with such sarcasm. But then his tone turned to annoying anger. "But never interrupt the host like that again! From now on, only I explain the rules of every stage and nothing else!"

"Excuse me, McLean, but are you sure anyone of these obstacles are gonna do damage to my good looks? I don't wanna get anything real muddy splattering to this face here..." Justin replied fearing a little bit for the worst.

"No Justin, all of these obstacles are dirt-free." Chris replied correctly.

"All right, looks like this contest is right up my alley..." Justin spoke with such cool relief coming from his handsome face.

"Aww, what's the matter, isn't Justin gonna be afraid of getting his nice hair messed up by the rope hang? Heh, you'd be lucky if you can make it all the way! Face it, I'm more hunkier and more muy caliente than you. And unlike you, I actually got a girl!" Alejandro said as he was showing off to Justin's face. This whole conversation made Heather a little bit nervous and a bit blushed. Justin seemed to have watched Heather blushing at Alejandro's comment. He was a bit annoyed at this agitated situation.

"Really? Well, why don't I rip those lips of yours that you used to kiss Heather with, and use them to kiss your own ass?" Justin smirked gladly as that little insult irritated Alejandro. His Latin blood was now starting to grow to anger-like heights.

"You trying to intimidate me, amigo?" Alejandro said aggressively.

"If it's worth ruining my hair and my body just to teach you a lesson, then I am!" Justin exclaimed angrily as both Alejandro stood from each other face-to-face. But their little faceoff was soon stopped by Heather who had to separate them a bit.

"You guys, this is no time to be fighting! If you wanna fight so bad, just save it after the frickin' competition!" Heather exclaimed at both men, but to her very surprise, she didn't realize that she was touching both of their muscular chests. Heather let out a surprising blush and coo. "Ooooooooooooh..."

"Okay, now just in case you're wondering. How are we gonna do this competition, you ask. What kind of order will both of you go in? Well, I have a huge box which features 37 colored balls. Inside these balls will be a number. The number you have drew will determine the order. For example, let's say Mike here drew number 1. That means he would have to be the first contestant to start the competition." Chris commented as he held the big box of balls.

"Chris, are you sure that the whole course is safe? Shouldn't you just have someone to test it first?" Cameron replied with his knees shaking like a quake.

"Don't need to, Cameron. You've watched this show before. You know what you know what you're capable of." Chris smirked evilly as Cameron felt like he was really gonna faint from the inside out. Or perhaps, Cameron was wetting his colons enough for him to almost make him wanna pee. "Okay everyone. Time to draw a ball!"

With this statement, both of the 37 contestants went right to the big box that Chris held with both hands, dug deep inside the box, and drew their number. A few moments later. The order was like this:

1. Staci

2. Owen

3. Lindsay

4. Anne Maria

5. Lightning

6. D.J.

7. Sadie

8. Geoff

9. Bridgette

10. Dakota

11. LeShawna

12. Jo

13. Eva

14. Noah

15. Izzy

16. Sam

17. Duncan

18. Alejandro

19. Heather

20. Justin

21. Brick

22. Harold

23. B

24. Sierra

25. Cody

26. Mike

27. Trent

28. Ezekiel

29. Zoey

30. Beth

31. Tyler

32. Katie

33. Scott

34. Gwen

35. Dawn

36. Cameron

37. Courtney

After the rest of the contestants drew their ball, both of their expressions on their faces became such a mixed reaction.

"What? I got last? This is insane! I deserve to go first, Chris!" Courtney complained angrily because of her negatively low number. She happened to draw the lowest of the low, number 37.

"All right! We got a number next to each other, Bridge! WHOOOOOOOOO!" Geoff spoke with such excitement as he hugged his loyal girlfriend Bridgette. He drew number 8 as Bridgette drew the number close to him, number 9.

"Ah! SHA-yes! Lightning got number 5! This is so gonna be easy!" Lightning exclaimed as he flexed his mighty muscles because of his number which was 5.

"My frickin' luck. I got 33rd... I deserve to be first!" Scott exclaimed out of hate that he too, like Courtney, got a very low number.

"Oh my gosh, I got first!" Staci exclaimed for joy as she drew lucky number 1. Drawing number 1 seemed to be luck for the skilled liar. "I remember my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather Doobie inventing the number 1, because number one-"

"NO ONE CARES, STACI!" the rest of the contestants shouted at her angrily, therefore cutting her off much to Chris's annoyance.

"Well, thanks to the headache I'm soon gonna have thanks to Staci's yapping, the competition will begin after the break when we get set for Total... Drama... Ninja Warrior!" Chris exclaimed as they now went to break and the contestants went right to the stands. Meanwhile, the rest of the contestants soon gave their thoughts on a secret confessional right next to the Ninja Warrior entrance stage.

*Confessional*

Sierra - Oh, my goodness, I love Ninja Warrior! I can't believe I'm in the very same presence of the Ninja Warrior all-stars! I mean, Makoto Nagano? Shingo Yamamoto? Toshihiro Takeda? This is incredible! Did you know that Makoto Nagano is a ship captain? I really wanna see Cody in something so sexy like that! Then again, my Cody-Wody would look so crappy as a gas station manager. But Cody would look so hot as a firefighter! *sighs* Ahhhhhhhhhhh...

Brick - This is excellent for a soldier like me! To be honest, I have watched all episodes of Ninja Warrior ever since it first came on! I can't wait to test out my military skills such as the Jumping Spider and the Halfpipe Attack! I'm telling you, this may be my chance to win that million dollars and get my title of Total Drama Ninja Warrior! I'm gonna make the MacArthur family proud!

Mike - I can tell this is gonna be bowling shoe ugly. Couldn't Chris train us for this kind of stuff? It would be a miracle if I could pass the first stage, let alone the third, and I can't explain much about the fourth. Let's hope my condition doesn't get to me like last time.

Harold - Even though I can't stand ninjas, I'm up for a challenge! GOSH! Did you know that Ninja Warrior is actually called "Sasuke" in Japan? It's actually a true story, considering that "Sasuke" was broadcast as a special part of "Muscle Ranking", but it became an independent program when "Muscle Ranking" was discontinued. The first competition was held indoors, marking the only time the show did not take place outside. Competitions generally start in the daytime and continue until completed regardless of weather or darkness. If you ask me it's- *gets cut off by static*

Geoff - Whoo hoo! I've come here to rock this course! Me and Bridge have been training for this kind of thing back home! Believe it or not, me and Bridgette worked our butts off to build us a mini training course which features the Salmon ladder from the second stage and the Cliff Hanger from the third stage. With all this training that me and my babe have done, the results are gonna be worth it! WOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Lightning - Oh, yeah! Lightning doesn't need any training to get where he wants to be right now! Lightning knows the skills needed to become a ninja warrior. I may not have won million dollars back on Revenge Of The Island, but when you see me stand tall on Mount Midoriyama, you know who to bet on! Not even Nagano, Yamamoto, Takeda, Akiyama, and Yamada can hold a candle to me! SHA-LIGHTNING!

Anne Maria - Okay, I may not be familiar with this Ninja Warlord, or whatever the heck it's called, but I'm certain that I can handle this stage very easily. The three other stages including that huge mountain that looks like Zoey's head, is no problem whatsoever. The only problem is getting my precious pouffe wet when I hit the water. Not a very good thing.

Alejandro - Justin needs to be taught a lesson. That little chihuahua's gonna regret making that snide comment about me and in front of my lovely little senorita Heather! And I can't even believe that little Hawaiian hoser is gonna compete next to her! By the night this is over, Justin's gonna enjoy seeing his fangirls right through a stretcher. Believe you me...

Justin - I can't stand that bean-eating fruit, Alejandro. He thinks that he's got my looks, my style, my charming presence. And worse of all, he's got Heather wrapped around his little finger! I have no clue what she sees in him. The way she sees him as "perfect". I should be the perfect one here, not that little dink with a soulpatch! Look at me, I got the perfect face, perfect abs, perfect hair, and not to mention a perfect butt! I have to do everything in my power to see that he doesn't walk away with the million dollars! I have to make sure of this!

Heather - Wow... the idea of two men fighting over me... Hmmmmmm, I like this angle a lot. And the way I felt their chests was so soothing and so warm and... *snaps out of it* What am I doing? I'm not here for anyone's love other than my love for the million dollars. With my long sexy legs like these, I'm gonna crush this competition like I do anyone else! And that's a promise I intend to keep.

Jo - I've been training for something like this now. And the idea of Brick competing couldn't make it any sweeter. I'll show Sir Leaks-a-Lot what a real athlete does with hard work! One way or another, I'm gonna be the next Ninja Warrior and G.I. Joke's just gonna be another dust in the wind!

Duncan - My escaping skills are gonna be up to use here. Just so anyone knows, I've done a lot of hard training back at the juvenile center for all it's worth. If I can imagine having police guards coming right after me, I can use my speed to attack the course head-on. If I can avoid Courtney, I can make it out alright. That girl's nothing but a vicious firecracker mixed with twice the firepower!

Courtney - I can't believe I got frickin' last... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!


Just so anyone is not familiar with names like Makoto Nagano, Shingo Yamamoto, Toshihiro Takeda, Kazuhiko Akiyama, and Katsumi Yamada, they we're both contestants on "Ninja Warrior" and everyone of them competed in the competition mostly out of everyone who competed. They are known as the "Ninja Warrior All-Stars". The two of all-stars, Akiyama and Nagano, had won the entire event, making them grand champions. The recent tournament happened on October 3, 2011 and a shoe salesman by the name of Yuuji Urushihara, a.k.a. The Japanese Al Bundy, defeated the entire course twice in 2010 and 2011, which made him a double grand champion. Unfortunately, the Ninja Warrior all-stars will not be competiting, which why only the Total Drama contestants will be competiting instead, just so anyone's not confused.

This was the reason I decided to bring both Total Drama and Ninja Warrior together. I want to see what everyone thinks of the idea. So get ready, get set, the competition will begin next chapter! Read and review everyone! BAZINGA!