This is based off headcanon number 147 at youngjusticeheadcanons on Tumblr:

147. Whenever Batgirl and Nightwing are alone in the Cave, Batman sends Robin as a 'precautionary measure.' It has happened so many times now that all three of them know it isn't a coincidence.

I don't own Young Justice.

Warning: A lot of kissing ahead. No sex, just a lot of kisses.

Batman isn't stupid. No, far from it. He may be a bit clueless when it comes to relationships, but that's only when he's part of the equation. He's a detective, so he sees the signs and know what they'll lead to. He knew that Superboy and Miss Martian would date eventually the first time he saw the two in the same room. Kid Flash and Artemis were a little more confusing, but after the mission in Biyalia, the end result was obvious.

With Robin, though, it'd been a bit more confusing. Dick had lived with Bruce since he was a tender eight years old, and he'd seen the young boy grow and mature in leaps and bounds before his very eyes. He'd never really expressed that much interest in the opposite sex, though. No, the acrobat seemed perfectly content to stick with his flips and technology. He did have a friend outside of his hero circle, though; Commissioner Gordon's daughter.

Young Barbara Gordon was a year older than Dick, but the two were close friends. Bruce could see that she was a person around whom he could be Dick Grayson – not the wealthy Richard Grayson or the dazzling young hero Robin. The two are friendly, though. They laugh and they joke and they tease – nothing romantic there. Batman does notice that all of Dick's good friends so far seem to be redheads – Barbara, Wally, and Roy – but he thinks nothing of it. His son gains more friends when they start the Team, and he brushes the small detail to the back of his mind. If it becomes important, he can come back to it.

He's in for the shock of his life, though, when Dick expresses interest in Zatanna. It's so sudden and unexpected, and really – didn't he train his son to hide romantic feelings better than that? Surely everyone on the Team and Zatanna knew exactly how his protégé felt towards the young magician! Dear lord, Zatara was going to kill him and Dick for this.

However, nothing seems to come of the puppy crush. Zatanna drops in for a visit every now and then, but Robin is hardly ever present, usually occupied in Gotham. Then, Zatara is lost to the Helmet of Fate, and the relationship is less about "love" (if such a term can even be applied to a crush) and more about comfort. He doesn't see any sudden surges of affection between the two until after New Year's, when he reviews the Watchtower's security cameras and receives a face full of teenagers making out.

It's when he sees that Dick returns Zatanna's kiss with passion that he begins to worry.

Suddenly, he finds himself worrying over every relationship his son has with females. He already knows to watch out for Zatanna, but what of Artemis? She may currently be enamored with the speedster (he resists the urge to cry 'I knew it!' every time he sees them; that would be extremely unBatman-like to do), but it could only be a matter of time before she turns around and begins to prey on Dick. There's also the added threat that she attends Gotham Academy with him, regardless of the fact that the archer does not know his secret identity.

But perhaps Barbara is the biggest threat. She's been friends with Dick since Bruce first took him in, and he gets the feeling that Dick is going to inform her of his superhero identity quite soon. She's grown suspicious of his disappearances as of late, and her behavior resembles a jealous girlfriend more than Bruce cares to admit. Honestly, it's her finding out about their family's secret that he fears the most. Maybe he wouldn't mind as much if Barbara Gordon were just some random Gotham girl, but she's not. She's Commissioner Gordon's daughter, meaning if she can't keep her mouth shut then Gordon – and potentially the rest of the GCPD – will find out.

He trusts the girl…he's just not sure if he trusts her that much yet.

He's not given much of a choice in the matter, though, because less than a year later Dick decides to go out trick-or-treating with her (her, as Batgirl, which is…odd for him, and Dick as Superboy) and the two end up almost getting mugged and killed by some punks. Dick fights back and ultimately takes down the thugs, but Barbara helps as well. Apparently, the girl's got a black belt in karate (quite an achievement for her age), and she put it to good use. The two return to Wayne Manor immediately after, and Dick has to inform Bruce that Barbara figured out their game. Apparently, Dick had used some moves that Barbara knew from watching Robin fight (which made him suddenly feel extremely self-conscious, as neither of the two crime fighters knew she had been watching them so closely) and put two and two together. The fact that Dick Grayson of all people had taken down the armed and dangerous punks, though, was the real key.

And then Barbara does the worst thing. "Mr. Wayne," she says with a dangerous glint in her blue eyes, "I'll keep this a secret, but only if you let me in on it too." Bruce knows that there's nothing he can do about it, and he hates himself for it. He'd never meant for Dick to get involved in all this crime fighting, and never in a million years had he ever wanted Barbara to fight alongside him.

"And how, exactly, do you plan on doing that?" He asks, fixing her with a stern look. It probably won't do much to dissuade her, but a man can hope.

She gestures to the costume she's wearing – it's a more feminine approach to his costume, with some bright yellows and grays as opposed to his darker blacks – and says as if it's the most obvious thing in the world, "As Batgirl, duh. I don't see any room for another Robin, do you?" Dick gives Bruce a look over Barbara's shoulder. It's something between oh god yes please let her do it and oh my god are you insane don't let her get away with this, and the mixed feelings are something to which he can easily relate.

He sighs, bowing his head as he massages his temples. "Can we talk about this tomorrow, Barbara? Take tonight to make sure this is what you really want. It's best to not act rashly." She scowls a bit, but goes to change back into her normal clothes (he tries not to think about how he could soon be referring to them as civvies) and departs with Alfred back to her home.

Of course it does nothing to change her mind, and six months later Gotham's got a Batgirl on their hands.

The Dynamic Duo – should it be called the Terrific Trio now? – keeps it on the down low for as long as they possibly can. For a long time, most people believe that Batgirl is just a myth that a few crazier criminals made up. But then, one day someone catches a blurry photo of her and the truth comes out. They just barely manage to keep Gordon from finding out, but it's big news in the superhero world. It's even bigger news when the figure out how exactly Barbara became Batgirl, as it's not often at all that someone manages to blackmail Batman.

Soon enough, she joins the Team. Barbara's coming along nicely, and she gets better each mission. The Team loves her, and she loves the Team. The redhead fits right in amongst the heroes, as if she was made for this life.

However, Bruce quickly learns that he needs to watch out for little Miss Barbara Gordon.

He's doing his usual review of the Cave's security tapes when he comes across something he does not like. No sir, he does not like this at all. One of the cameras catches Nightwing and Batgirl eating in the kitchen together. It's nothing out of the ordinary, except for the fact that they're alone (a rare feat with the amount of new recruits running around as of late) and far too close for Bruce's comfort. The two are eating ice cream out of the container (both of them will get an extra intense workout to make up for the junk food he specifically told them not to eat), heads bumping together every now and then as they share a laugh.

The ice cream is soon gone, but the two stay in close proximity, hands moving to close around each other. It's behavior he hasn't observed in the two before, and he idly wonders how he could've missed this development in their relationship. They had been going out alone more often…and hadn't Dick mentioned something about the movies not that long ago? Perhaps…

For someone commonly called the World's Greatest Detective, Bruce suddenly feels extremely unobservant. Suddenly, a lot of minute details that he hadn't paid much attention to before are becoming prominent in his mind, coming together to form a picture that he's not happy with.

His son and Barbara Gordon are dating.

Now, it's not so much that he doesn't want his son dating Barbara; no, it's more along the lines of he's my baby boy he's too young for this STAY AWAY. Well, maybe not in those exact words, but it's close enough.

As he watches, though, Dick's head moves even closer to Barbara's, and suddenly the two are kissing. It's a quick, chaste kiss, but Barbara soon returns it with a quick peck on the tip of his nose. The two are laughing again, and both have blushes spreading across their faces. This must be a relatively recent development, then, if they're still so shy about that particular level of intimacy.

Good. He can still prevent this.

"So, you gonna head back for the night?" Barbara asks as she adjusts her sweater. She's about to go home herself, seeing as her dad will be home from his patrol in a half an hour. Dick looks up from the screen where he's currently reviewing some data, and smiles when he sees his girlfriend. They've only been going out for a few weeks at this point, but he's almost always excited to see her.

"Probably not, I've still got a lot of work to do tonight." His smile turns a bit rueful, and Babs gives a pitying laugh. She approaches and puts her hands around his waist, pulling him in tight. He smiles down at her, tilting her chin up so he can kiss her on the forehead. She giggles, then reaches up and, placing her hand behind his head, forces him down into a deep kiss. He's a little surprised, she can tell, but Dick doesn't pull away. He returns her kiss with equal intensity, running his hands through her thick red hair.

They break apart after a moment, both panting a bit. Neither has quite figured out how to kiss and breathe at the same time. Barbara hugs him again, this time resting her head on his chest.

"I'll miss you, you know," she says. Her and her father are going on a short father-daughter trip the next day in an attempt to make up for all the time they've missed with each other as of late. Babs has been busy being Batgirl, and Gordon has been busy being the Commissioner. Neither has had much time for the other in the past couple of weeks. Dick's not even sure if the Commissioner knows they're dating.

"I know," he says, smiling. He gives her a quick peck on the nose, and Babs smiles.

"You're gonna stay safe, right, my Hunk Wonder?" Dick grins and blushes a bit at her pet name for him, but nods nonetheless. Suddenly, though, the zeta tubes flare to life.

Recognized: Robin B-2-0.

Before the light has faded and Robin has completely materialized, Dick and Babs have separated and are a good couple of feet away from each other. Dick coughs, cheeks still a little red. Barbara shoots him one last grin, then heads for the zeta beam.

"Bye, Boy Wonder!" She calls, then the zeta tube announces her departure. There's a moment of silence, where Tim looks between Dick and the zeta tube where Barbara had been a moment before, an odd look on his face. He looks like he's trying to figure something out, but there's just not enough puzzle pieces to get an accurate picture.

"Hey buddy," Dick says, trying to pretend nothing had been happening before his younger brother had entered, "What's up? You need something?"

"Huh? Oh, no," Tim replies, eyes suddenly on Dick. "Bats sent me here. Said I was supposed to spend the night here, or something like that. Not sure why, he didn't give me a reason."

"Huh," Dick says, then ruffles his hair. He know Timmy hates it, but Dick also knows that his brother doesn't get near enough healthy physical contact. "Better head off to bed then, if you plan on getting any sleep." Tim grouchily fixes his hair, but gives Dick a quick hug before he heads off to his room (a tradition forced upon him by none other than the acrobat himself).

Dick watches his brother as he exits the monitor womb, heading for the sleeping quarters. Bats had sent him, huh? Could the old man be up to something?

Nah, he wasn't that obvious when it came to stuff like that…Was he?

Apparently, he was. Any time Barbara and Dick were alone in the cave (regardless of what they were actually doing), Tim soon arrived under orders from Batman.

"The cameras can't catch us here, can they?" Babs whispers as they hide behind some of the vehicles in the hangar. Dick glances around, finger on his lips as he hushes her.

"They shouldn't be able to," he replies, voice hardly audible, "but I don't know if Bats has any microphones hidden, so – "he's broken off as Babs suddenly moves in for the kill, kissing him full on the lips. Dick kisses her back with equal intensity. He's missed being able to kiss her – they've been keeping their relationship on the down low, for numerous reasons. One of them just so happens to be that Conner has just broken up with M'gann, and Dick kind of can't bring himself to let either one of them see him in such a happy relationship with Barbara. Another is that now it's common knowledge that their secret identities are dating, so Dick wants to prevent people from seeing the similarities that exist between Dick Grayson and Barbara Gordon, and Nightwing and Batgirl.

Plus, Bats suddenly seems to have suddenly developed a "NO DATES, ONLY JUSTICE" mindset if the way he keeps sending Timmy to "watch over them" whenever they're alone is any indication. The man may deny it (though Dick isn't exactly about to ask), but even Wally's picked up on it.

Dick's hands run through Barbara's bright red locks, marveling at how smooth they are. Barbara in turn tugs a bit on his ebony black curls, and a moan of pleasure escapes his lips. He can feel her lips form a smile against his own.

Once again, however, they're cut off by the zeta tubes announcing Robin's arrival.

They break apart, panting, both feeling a mixture of happiness and irritation. This has to have been the third time it's happened this week, and they're quickly growing sick of it. Tim himself is even getting a little tired of being sent to the Cave whenever Babs and Dick are there alone. Batman makes him drop everything and go when it happens, and sometimes he's in the middle of really important stuff! Plus, he always feels really awkward, because he knows exactly what he's interrupting when he comes.

"Better hurry," Dick says, resigned. Babs smoothes her shirt and quickly ties her hair back before giving the acrobat a smile and slipping out of the hangar. Dick watches her leave, then smoothes her hair and turns to one of the unfinished cycles. Blue Beetle, aka Jaime Reyes, still doesn't have a cycle. He doesn't necessarily need one with his nifty scarab, but then again, Wally didn't need one either with his super speed.

"You got our movie picked out, Hunk Wonder? It better not be some nasty horror movie this time," Barbara says as she settles down on the couch next to Dick. Dick, meanwhile, is fast forwarding through commercials until he finally lands on the DVD menu. "Huh, Pirates of the Caribbean? Never seen it. Is it any good?"

"Never seen it either, but Wally says it's pretty good, so I guess we'll have to trust his judgment," Dick replies as he hits play and sits back. He rests an arm around Barbara's shoulders, and she leans into his chest.

"Well, Wally's the one who encouraged us to see Human Centipede and Two Girls One Cup," she grumbles, but Dick hushes her and tells her the movie's starting. It's no use though, as the movie's hardly started (Captain Jack Sparrow hasn't even reached the docks yet) when the zeta tubes announce Robin's arrival yet again.

Dick's jaw tightens and Barbara huffs. God forbid they spend any time together ever doing anything alone! It's seriously annoying right now, and Babs may or may not be considering giving Batman a piece of her mind.

"Uh, hi?" Tim says quietly, "I'll just…sit over here. Don't mind me!" he squeaks, settling in a chair as far away from Dick and Babs as he can possibly get. It doesn't matter, though, because the mood is thoroughly ruined.

Again.

"Hey Babs, what'cha need?" Dick asks as he searches the Cave's kitchen for measuring cups. He's in the mood for baking today, and he even brought along his mother's old cookbook to help him.

"I didn't know the Boy Wonder could cook," Barbara says instead, teasing him. "Oooh, snickerdoodles. You realize Wally will probably eat the entire batch before they've even been out of the oven for more than a minute, right?"

"I can't cook, but I was hoping my mom's cookbook would be able to make up for it," Dick laughs. "And yes, I know. I swear, he could be in China and he'd still be able to tell if there were cookies fresh out of the oven here!"

The redhead smiles at his joke. "It's true, though. Hey, can I help? I've never made snickerdoodles before!"

"Aha! Found them, finally!" Dick exclaims triumphantly, holding up the measuring cups as if they're a beloved prize. "And sure, go ahead. Wash your hands, and we'll begin!" Barbara obliges, and soon the two are standing side by side as they make the dough.

"So, now that we're done making the dough," Barbara says a few minutes later, "we…roll it in sugar and cinnamon?" She refers to the cookbook. "Yup, that's what your mom's cookbook says.

Dick fills two separate bowls with the powders, then they begin. "Hey!" He says suddenly, giving Babs a playful shove, "No eating raw cookie dough!" She's got a finger in her mouth, caught in the act of swiping some dough from the bowl when she thought her boyfriend wasn't looking. She wrinkles her nose then sticks her tongue out at Dick, who smears some cinnamon across the bridge of her nose.

"You jerk," she grumbles playfully, swiping the brownish streak off with her sleeve. They return to rolling the balls of dough, but two minutes later, Barbara catches Dick sneaking some dough. "You hypocrite!" She exclaims in mock horror, and Dick blushes.

"Eheheh…oops?" He says sheepishly, grinning shamefacedly. Babs returns his earlier actions with a streak of cinnamon across his check, followed by a quick peck on the nose.

"Back to work, muffin man," she says with a smile, bumping him playfully with her hip. Caught off guard, he stumbles a bit, then catches his balance and bumps her right back. The cookies are quickly forgotten as it develops into an all-out hip-bumping war. It's only when Dick narrowly manages to avoid faceplanting right into the table that they return to the cookies, still laughing.

It's almost silent except for a snicker here or there, until the zeta tubes announce that Robin is here to interrupt their alone time again. This time, though, he doesn't appear to realize that he's just interrupted another one of their moments, as he makes a beeline right for the dough.

"Cookie dough!" he exclaims, staring unabashedly at the delicious contents of the mixing bowl. Being the germaphobe he is, he quickly cleans his hands with a sanitation wipe before he nicks a sizeable glob of the stuff.

"Timmy!" Dick and Barbara admonish him, and he meets their disapproving stares head-on.

"Come on," he says, "don't think I can't see the cookie dough on your faces. You've both eaten some of it" The two share a smile, then shrug.

"Guilty as charged," Dick says. He moves aside then, making room for Tim to help them finish. Without Dick and Babs goofing off, the cookies are done and in the oven in no time.

Sure enough, Wally finishes the entire batch before anyone even gets one.

Dick's had enough of this. He loves his little brother, but his constant interruptions have got to stop. But how…?

"Hold on a second," Dick mutters to himself as he adjusts his binoculars. He's on a stakeout, covering the city until Bats returns home from solving a case in Europe tomorrow morning. And, if he's not mistaken, that's his little brother strolling along the sidewalk down there. Hadn't Timmy asked for the night off? Something along the lines of having a test the next day he needed to study for?

Dick zooms in a bit. Sure enough, not only is it Timmy walking along down there, it's Timmy and a girl! He catches a glimpse of her face, but it's no one Dick's ever seen before. Blonde, pretty, around his age…must be some chick he goes to school with, then. As he watches, though, she grabs Tim's hand. Keeping his eyes on the two, the acrobat watches how his brother blushes but doesn't pull away.

He likes this girl.

A slow, shit-eating grin spreads across Dick's face. This is blackmail material. This is one way to get Tim to leave him and Babs alone when they're having alone time! Reaching up to his mask, he presses a hidden button. A hidden camera quietly catches a few shots of the couple, and Dick makes sure to get a few frames of their intertwined hands.

Perfect.

"So, Tim," Dick says the next morning as he munches cheerily on his cereal. Tim, never a morning person merely grunts in response as he lays his head on the table. "I saw something interesting while I was out on patrol last night. Do you know what I saw, Tim?"

"What, Dick? What did you see?" The acrobat can tell that his cheerfulness is grating on Tim's nerves, but honestly he doesn't care. Payback's a bitch, after all.

"This," he says, sliding some photos across the table. Tim looks up, and as soon as he catches a glimpse of the photos he shoves them into his sweatshirt.

"What were you doing watching me last night?" He hisses, suddenly wide-awake as he checks quickly to make sure Alfred isn't listening.

"I don't know, what were you doing hanging around downtown instead of studying for that test you told me about last night?" Dick replies, an irritating smirk on his face.

Tim begs instead of giving him an answer. "You can't tell Bruce," he pleads, "Please!"

The elder brother mimes stroking a beard, looking as if he's contemplating the offer. "Okay," He says after a moment, "it's a deal." Tim sighs in relief, but Dick cuts him off. "But! On one condition – you leave me and Babs alone for once?"

Tim doesn't even hesitate before he reaches over and shakes Dick's hand.

"Deal."

"So, we've been out here for almost a whole hour now, by ourselves, and still no Tim. What gives?" asks as she rests her head on Dick's shoulder, watching the waves crash onto the beach.

"Blackmail is a wonderful thing," is Dick's only response, and Babs smirks at him, poking him in the side.

"You sly dog, you," she laughs, "You finally figured something out!" She gave him a kiss on the cheek, and he smiled down at her.

"Well, Bats will figure us out soon enough," he says, "but we should enjoy it while it lasts."

"Yes, let's," Barbara replies in a sultry tone, kissing him again. He smiles, and returns her kiss with passion.

The waves crash, the birds sing, and the setting sun casts an orange glow over the preoccupied couple on the golden sands. Yes, today is a good day.

A/N: First off, UGH I HATE THIS NEW FORMAT.

Second, I'm not happy with the end of this, but it's over 4k and that's pretty long for a oneshot. Anyway, DickBabs has quickly become my new OTP of OTPs, topping even Spitfire when it comes to Young Justice.

Thank you, Tumblr, for that.

Also, I'm now OFFICIALLY ON SUMMER BREAK. Lots of writing time! Actually no, not really (with college visits and work camps and youth conferences and hopefully getting a summer job and a trip to NYC, I'm pretty busy this summer), but I'll still write anyway.