Hokage robes were itchy.

There was just no getting around it. No matter how cool he looked in them, he was getting a rash on his… unmentionable areas. And his job required a lot of sitting down.

"Hinata-chan?" Naruto called, dropping the paperwork back onto the desk with an aggrieved sigh. His hand was going to fall off if he wrote one more letter. He'd actually lost an arm in a fight once, but he swore writing too much hurt more. Sakura could reattach severed limbs, but the power of the wrist ache was beyond her, apparently.

"Yes, Hokage-sama?" Hinata appeared in the doorway, smiling slightly.

"Who do I need to ask to make my robes stop itching?"

"Y-your personal launderers, Hokage-sama." Hinata replied instantly.

"I have personal launderers?"

"Yes, sir. And a small group of tailors."

"Who pays these people?" Naruto grabbed his paperwork again, as though the latest threat from Arashi would grant him the answer, "I thought I approved all expenses?"

"You do, Hokage-sama."

"I, er… should probably read them more closely, then…"

"Yes, Hokage-sama."

"Could you stay a bit later tonight, to help me out with all this?" Naruto gestured to all the papers, doing his best to look helpless and imploring.

Hinata fidgeted on the spot. Her cheeks coloured pale pink. "Um. N-no, Hokage-sama. In fact, I was going to ask if I could p-possibly… leave earlier."

This was weird. Hinata normally had no problem staying for hours after her shift as his assistant ended. Naruto had been informed by an irate Shizune that assistants weren't like bodyguards, they weren't expected to be on hand at all hours. But Hinata had never minded.

"Uh… why?" Naruto asked, when no answer seemed to be forthcoming.

"My father has asked… that I entertain a member of another clan, for dinner. I need to practice being a host, he says, even though it l-looks as though Hanabi will inherit the clan, not me, b-but he –"

"That's fine." Naruto said gently, cutting off Hinata's increasingly fretful gabbling.

Naruto never claimed to be a smart man. What was it Iruka had said, all those years ago? No brains, all brawn. He was about as subtle as a brick to the face. But he had grown to know Hinata very well over the years, after that shocking confession and subsequent sacrifice.

Hiashi wanted Hinata to get married.

Naruto felt the news settle over him with a disturbing amount of serenity.

He nodded, every inch the benevolent boss. "You work longer hours than you're supposed to, anyway. I won't begrudge you half an hour." He smiled.

Hinata paused in her fidgeting, looking confused yet relieved, "Th-thank you, Hokage-sama."

"You can leave whenever you want." Naruto said. His eyes felt itchy now, too. Stupid robes. He would need to contact the launderers on his own now. His bottom lip jutted out, shaking his smile.

Hinata bowed deeply, "Then I will take my leave, Hokage-sama."

As she turned to go, however, something drove him to stop her.

"Wait, Hinata-chan." He said, standing up from his desk, robes flowing out. He didn't know what his expression looked like. It felt desperate.

Hinata looked startled, "Hokage –"

"Why did you refuse to join the Anbu after I offered you the position?" Naruto blurted out. It was the least dumb of all the questions swimming around in his mind. Why are you looking for a husband? I thought you said you would always – I thought you meant what you said. I don't want to lose that.

"I had duties to my clan," Hinata replied, her tone uncertain, "I needed to be available to them whenever possible."

"No. That's not it."

Silence stretched between them.

Hinata's head was bowed, her hair obscuring her face like a curtain. When she looked up, her gaze was anguished.

"I… I wanted to be closer to you, Hokage-sama." She said, in a hushed, stricken voice.

Her face was red. He thought his might be too.

He could not speak a word for what felt like hours. His thoughts were too scattered, his mouth too dry.

"You may go, Hinata-chan." He finally reminded her, rocking back on his heels as he realised he had been inching closer to her.

"I'm sorry," He said sincerely, as she made to leave once more, "I shouldn't have asked. I just… needed to know."

Hinata bowed again and scurried out of the room.

Naruto collapsed in his chair with a great sigh of frustration.

His chest itched.

xxxxxxxx

Sakura was clutching her textbook close to her face, trying to avoid catching Itachi's eye. Ever since the… incident, he had been trying to engage her in conversation. She had said she would prefer to set herself on fire.

They compromised by remaining in the same room together, but in complete, awkward silence.

The incident had happened yesterday, the hours now stretching into evening. They had spent the day trying to re-establish boundaries without stepping on each other's toes.

She was attempting to study the theory of chakra scalpels, the best way to form them, which chakra type was most suited to the technique, etc.

Chakra scalpels could normally hold her attention with ease, but today Sakura's mind was rather stuck on something in particular.

After she had attempted to heal whatever damage her kick had caused Itachi, he had refused to let her touch him. He had instead subtly angled his body away from her, his pelvis in particular.

Sakura knew biology. She also knew men.

Hence, the desire to set herself on fire.

She risked a glance at him over her book.

He appeared to be calmly reading one of the books Sakura had bought him.

Completely composed.

Why was she the embarrassed one? He was the one who –

I refuse to blush, she thought to herself. I am kunoichi of Konoha. I have exceptional infiltration skills. I can supress signs of emotion and stress. A shinobi must never show their tears. Emotions are unnecessary things. Shinobi must –

"Sakura?" Itachi said softly, his voice carrying across the room.

Sakura felt all the blood in her body rush to her cheeks.

She would not look at him.

"Sakura, I wanted to apologise," He said, sounding serene and unruffled, "My… reaction was unacceptable. You are being forced to live with me because I wished it, and so do not deserve any less than simple courtesy, and yet I… I found myself overcome –"

"Stop talking." Sakura said. Her voice trembled. Pathetic.

"I was aware that I am… att –"

"I said stop talking."

"But I believed I could –"

She stood.

He immediately got to his feet in response.

She still refused to look at him.

She could feel him from across the room. The warmth of his body.

Sasuke sat at the table, his bony wrists illuminated by the overhead light, his head down

Sasuke's palm was as damp as hers, and his wrists were thin and brittle

He was afraid. And he needed her

She couldn't do this. She could not feel like this.

"I'm going out for the day." She bit out, whirling around to head for the door.

"Sakura, I –"

"Don't leave the house."

xxxxxxxx

She sensed a familiar chakra the moment she left the building.

"Naruto!" She exclaimed, surprised to see the Hokage out on the streets, clothed in his stately robes, a sour, pinched look on his face.

Lee lurked behind him, watching the street with a suspicious eye.

"Can we talk?" Naruto asked, blunt as ever.

"Sure. Er, my place probably isn't the best for privacy…"

"Oh man. I forgot about that. That must suck." Naruto scratched the back of his head, grimacing in sympathy.

Sakura willed her stubborn blush away. "It does." She said shortly.

"Nowhere more secure or private than my office. Or so they tell me." Naruto shrugged, "You don't mind the walk?"

Sakura just looked at him.

He laughed and set off without another word.

Naruto was well-meaning enough, but even he underestimated her without fail. Did she mind the fifteen minute walk to his office? Did she mind taking frost-bitten hikes up mountains to quash banditry? Did she mind eight hour journeys on foot? Running faster than the eye could see for miles and miles?

Was she not just as much of a shinobi as he was?

Lee trailed behind them on the silent walk, his alert nature putting them all on edge.

By the time they arrived, Sakura was in a foul mood, having had time to stew in her bitterness and inequality.

There were still people in the building. Some approached Naruto with some issue or another, hopeful smiles dying at the sight of a grim Hokage and an equally grim ex-teammate.

Naruto locked Lee out of the office, ordering him to get out of hearing range. Lee looked like a kicked dog, but complied without a word of protest.

"Hinata is considering marriage." Naruto said without preamble.

"Oh?" Sakura said, unsure of how to react to the news. Why would Naruto call her to his office to tell her this?

"Years ago, she told me… You knew she had feelings for me, right? You've mentioned it before."

"Yes…" Sakura said slowly. She had teasingly brought up Hinata's little crush a few times when they were younger. Naruto, the idiot, had never taken her seriously.

"Well, she told me loved me. During Pain's invasion. And then she nearly died trying to save me. But you saved her."

Sakura blinked.

That was… a lot to take in.

"You were always hung up on Sasuke." Naruto said without resentment. He was simply stating a fact, "You never looked at me as anything other than a pest. I… I thought of Hinata as just another one of the Rookie Nine. For years. And even when I knew her better, even when I knew her feelings… I was still – still hung up on you."

Sakura's palms were clammy. She could taste copper in her mouth.

"But now, Hinata… the thought of her getting married to someone else… I hate it! But I'm confused, because, it's not like my f-feelings for you ever went away… I just, I want to know, is there any chance of – of you and me ever happening? I need to know, before I tell Hinata how I feel. I don't want any… any loose ends." He shrugged helplessly. His eyes could not seem to settle on anything, jumping from one thing to another. Everything but her. His tan cheeks were flushed darkly.

For so many years, Sakura's love life was barren and uncared for.

She had spent all her time attending to her plants, her cat and her patients. Anything but the thought of moving on from Sasuke. Determined to stay faithful in a one-sided relationship. Such a waste of her youth.

Sasuke did not love her back. He never would.

'You deserve more than waiting for someone to grow up and having to deal with the pain they cause in the meantime.'

Itachi's words felt more ironic than helpful right now.

She had treated Naruto as Sasuke had treated her.

"I don't love you that way."

Sakura's words seemed to resound throughout the room.

She could not bring herself to regret them, even as Naruto's eyes widened and he recoiled away. She had to be honest with him. Prettying it up with a speech about how they were such good friends and how she was sure she could love him if she really, really tried, that would be unworthy of him.

Naruto needed closure.

"Right." He said, shaking himself out of his daze, "Right, then."

"More importantly," Sakura continued, "I don't think you love me that way either."

Naruto looked at his feet. "I don't know. I've never been in a relationship. No one's ever told me anything about this stuff, how to recognise love or whatever… for most of my life, I was a total outcast. This is all new to me."

"If you don't want Hinata to be with someone else, it's very likely you want to be with her." Sakura said simply, "Ask her out on a date. See where it goes from there."

"You're right. Of course you're right."

"And… Naruto? While we're getting things off our chest… can I just ask… do you think I'm weak?"

Naruto gaped at her, "What? You're like… you're the strongest woman I've met, except for baa-chan! You punch holes in the ground! You can literally pick up guys twice your size and toss them away! How could you even think that?"

"I don't know, maybe because everyone treats me like a fragile doll? You and every other shinobi I know – you treat me like I need help, like I'm less than you. I worked so hard to become better. I clawed my way out of mediocrity. I broke my knuckles over and over again just to strengthen the bones. I became a chuunin before you or Sasuke, and then, in less than a year, you surpassed me again. I kept reaching my breaking point, thinking I could change one thing about me, my hair, my strength, my chakra, and then I would be recognised. I wouldn't have to watch your backs anymore."

"But here I am," She spread her arms wide, "Still a chuunin. Still treated like the Hokage's ex-teammate. I just got tired of trying to change myself. No matter what I did, I could never reach your level. There's nothing special about me at all. So I stopped trying. I stopped taking missions. I threw myself into my work at the hospital."

"Sakura, I have always thought –"

"Sasuke thought you would be the one to confront him. It was you he was waiting for. Do you know how demoralising it is, being the weakest member of a team? Kakashi ignored me, Sasuke ridiculed me and you tried to protect me, all the time. It's always been about you and Sasuke. I've always been stuck on the sidelines."

"But I didn't come here to rant at you, sorry. I just… I just wanted to be the strong one. Just once. But to leave your shadow, I have to be exceptional. It's not fair at all."

Naruto looked deeply troubled, his brow furrowed.

"Ask Hinata out," She advised him, clapping a hand on his shoulder, "And maybe start assigning me missions again. It's time for me to start trying again."

xxxxxxxx

The conversation with Naruto had left a sour taste in her mouth and a feeling of discontent that would not shift, no matter how many drinks she knocked back.

Naruto was Hokage.

Not even out of his twenties. He had shot up through the ranks at dizzying speed. Not even the village's hatred and prejudice could slow down his progress. He won them over despite it all. The Council, made up of mostly old, crotchety men, had been forced to concede to the village's wishes.

The number one hyperactive ninja, the hated outcast, the kyuubi's host.

The Hokage.

Naruto had achieved so much in such a short time…

Sakura could not exactly call what Sasuke had done 'achievements,' per se, but there was no denying his infamy. The lone survivor of a massacre, he possessed a power that had almost died out with the rest of his family. If his kekkei genkai was not rare enough to impress, the fact that Orochimaru had gone to such incredible lengths to secure Sasuke's power showed just how strong he had been. At twelve years old, missing nin craved his talents.

Team Seven was made up of two men who were making history with every day they lived, and a girl who would either be forgotten or remembered solely for her association with the famous Naruto and Sasuke.

Hell of a legacy. At this rate, even the Haruno name would die with her, considering how childless her future looked.

Ino gulped down another glass, sighing happily, "I've missed this so much. You've no idea. It is so good to be free!"

Ino often complained about her work, calling it 'prison,' as if Sakura didn't know how much she adored her job as… whatever it was she did for Ibiki. Sakura did not want to know.

They were drinking a lime-green concoction that tasted nothing like lime and everything like a certain poison Sakura knew she had studied back in her apprentice days.

She picked up her glass and examined it, frowning with a concentration only the drunk were capable of. The name of the poison escaped her. It was made with the cactus juice found in Suna. And beans from the Nara Forest. You had to crush the beans with the flat side of a –

"Sakura," Ino said, her voice very far away. Sakura squinted. She could see a vast expanse of green. Was she in a field?

"Oi, Forehead. Wake up, lazybones. Your front door's warded, you paranoid little creature. You need to let me in. Unless you want to sleep out here. I don't mind either way."

Every other word out of Ino's mouth was an insult. It was part of the reason Sakura liked her so much. It really was a tragedy she had missed out on so many years of being friends with her.

Wait – front door? Warded?

"Itachi." Sakura murmured. She felt Ino stiffen.

She became aware of her position, which was hanging from Ino's shoulder, head swinging perilously close to the other woman's backside.

"Urggggh, I wannabesickInourgh… Am I dead?"

"No." Ino said, with no small amount of amusement, "Definitely drunk, though. Whatever it was we were drinking, it was fantastic."

"That," Sakura said importantly, "was the desert poison, thistlebite. I did study this time, Tsunade-sama."

"Poison, huh? That's –"

Ino was cut off by the sound of the front door opening.

"Hello?" Uncle Kazuo said, sounding confused. "I heard voices."

"Kazuo-san!" Ino exclaimed, nearly dislodging Sakura in her eagerness to sweep the older man into a hug, "I've not seen you in ages! Sakura never tells me anything," she punctuated the claim with a particularly harsh shake of her shoulder. Sakura wobbled precariously, "How long are you staying?"

"Um, I'm not sure," Uncle Kazuo gave a hesitant, self-deprecating chuckle, "As long as Sakura wants me around, I suppose. I was just worried about her being on her own."

Ino was silent for a long moment. "Yeah. I worry about her too. As you can see, she's not exactly doing all that well."

"Hey!" Sakura wriggled indignantly, swatting Ino's backside, "I am self-sufficient. No matter what Sasuke says. I don't need a keeper. I take care of Yuki all on my own."

"Time for bed, I think." Uncle Kazuo said. That was strange – her uncle never treated her like this. She was an equal. They would drink wine together.

It was right there in her mind's eye, the two of them drinking until dawn crept up outside, pink clouds blocking out the morning sunshine. Condensation on the bottles. Impressing her uncle with her genjutsu. Her mother's favourite flowers appearing with a handseal and a flicker of chakra.

They both cried, because, because –

Her mother was dead. Her father was dead.

And…

"He's dead." Sakura whimpered, tears dripping from her face at a strange angle. Her body hung limp over Ino's shoulder.

Ino's fingers tightened. "Bed." She said quietly.

Itachi took Sakura from Ino without another word.

xxxxxxxx

It was getting rather tiresome, waking up and remembering embarrassing things that had happened the night before.

Itachi had dropped his Kazuo disguise the moment the door closed behind them, Sakura in his arms, hiccupping and teary-eyed. His pale face had been intense in the moonlight, his eyes a stark contrast to his skin.

"I'm so sorry, Sakura," He had said, placing her on the couch, "I didn't mean to confuse you. I thought you would remember –"

But Sakura had cried on, the shock of remembering Kazuo's death all too fresh. So Itachi had picked her up once more and, ignoring her protests, let himself into her bedroom again to drop her off in bed.

Sakura sat up, bed sheets pooling around her waist. She glared at her bedroom door.

Time to start trying again.

Itachi was awake, obviously. She could sense him pacing again.

She didn't bother trying to be quiet when she got up and padded over to her bedroom door.

She placed a hand on the wood and began the process of creating a complex barrier, no longer skipping the more subtle steps, ensuring that she was as thorough as possible.

Her chakra sang out.

She blinked, removing her hand. The barrier pulsed slightly.

It had been a little over an hour, judging by the sun's new position in the sky.

She bit her thumb, touching the injured digit to the door, keying the barrier to her blood.

There.

She got up, brushed herself down, and left the room.

Itachi immediately looked up from fussing Yuki, his expression inscrutable. His eyes slid from her to the door, then turned red. He swept his Sharingan the entire length of the door, then his eyes faded back to their normal hue.

Sakura offered him a small, enigmatic smile.

"It seems I can no longer enter your room," Itachi said admiringly, "Such a barrier would require intense focus and exceptional chakra control. I am… impressed."

"Thank you." Sakura said mildly, "Now, if you could refrain from breaking the one rule I ever gave you, that would be appreciated. Oh, and if you don't… that barrier will incinerate you."

She beamed at his look of awe and unease.

If she was stupid enough to get so drunk he would try to put her to bed again, she would damn well burn them both to death instead.

She was a shinobi.

She was not a joke.

xxxxxxxx

"Frankly, I'm no good with sushi." Ryouta said sadly, "It's just too… slippery."

Sakura stifled a laugh behind her hand. "Oh? What do you like, then?"

"Cake!" He beamed at her, pointing to his plate, "Just the right kind of consistency. I'm quite picky about the structure of my food."

"How do you feel about sauces?" Sakura asked, shoulders shaking with suppressed laughter.

"Sauces? Hmm, well… oh. Are you making fun of me?" Ryouta tilted his head, looking bemused.

"Me? No way!" Sakura giggled, "I genuinely want to know!"

"Well, I was going to say that I have no problem with sauce, provided it does not have any bits in it, but now I think I won't bother." He stuck his nose in the air, faux-haughtily.

They both chuckled at that.

Sakura couldn't help feeling relieved. Ryouta was colleague from the hospital, and she had invited him out for coffee and a snack from a local café before work, just a casual little meeting.

And yet she had spent an extra fifteen minutes fixing her hair that morning. Itachi had watched with undisguised interest and suspicion.

She had been a little worried that it would be… well, horrifically awkward. She hadn't dated in a while – though this wasn't a date! – and she felt more than a little rusty.

Ryouta was adorable. He was constantly overworked, always exhausted and babbling, and yet he had dimples and his nose crinkled when he smiled. He was probably the second nicest person she knew. (You would have to save a thousand orphanages before you exceeded Rock Lee's level of niceness)

"I can't help being fascinated by things like this," Ryouta argued good-naturedly, "I mean, just look at it!"

"It's a leaf, Ryouta."

"Completely unique from its fellows, and yet –"

"How many hours did you sleep last night?"

"Er, about… four, I think?"

"Seriously?! I'm buying you another coffee."

"I might not be up to Haruno-sama's standards of nursing," Ryouta shook his head gravely, "But I think I can still work if I take frequent power naps."

"Haruno-sama, eh?" She said wryly. Some of her more easily impressed colleagues had taken to calling her that. She didn't think it had reached the likes of Ryouta.

"Sorry, but if you excel at work, you have to reap the benefits. Like fawning adoration."

"You're too kind."

"I'm not joking now, Sakura-san," Ryouta smiled again, dimples on display, "You are honestly one of the most exceptional medic nins I have ever met."

Sakura took a large gulp of coffee to cover her embarrassment and the pleased smile that had spread across her face.

Some of you may recognise Ryouta from A Curious Turn of Events. If you do, don't forget to wave!

Oh dear. Oh dear oh dear oh dear.

Nearly a year since I last updated.

My word.

Shoot me.

I wrote a long-ass message about a possible hiatus in the latest A Curious Turn of Events chapter, so read that if you want to be up to date with Katlou news.

I'm so sorry about the massive gap between chapters. It's inexcusable.

I also don't want to leave you all with the impression that things are back to their standard updating schedule. I am still taking a break from fanfiction, but if I do manage to write, I will always post it for you guys. I'm really sorry for being such a lame duck.

I wrote this chapter back to front and I haven't edited it, so if there any glaring errors, do let me know :)

Btw, I am astonished that every single one of my main favourite pairings became canon. (That's not even a spoiler, because who knows what my main favourite pairings are? You don't, that's for sure. I am a tricksy lady, after all)

Quick poll because I've missed polling people randomly: Are you happy with the ending of Naruto?

A) Yes, no complaints here. Happy days and all that.

B) WTFBBQ. THE WORST. MY EYES ARE BLEEDING.

C) Meh, can't complain.

D) Other!

P.S. Itachi got a boner in the last chapter. Thought you ought to know.

I really hope some of you don't know what a boner is. Ah, the hilarity.