I was listening to the song 'Once Upon a December' from the movie Anastasia and it gave me hayffie feels (yeah, I know it's weird) Anyways, I then thought of this fic and it has been nagging me ever since.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games. If I did I would be making actual spin offs and checking the script for Catching Fire right now instead of writing fanfics and hayffie would've been canon XD

I looked out of the window and watched my friend Carissa walk out of the door and into the car with her new parents. She just got adopted; she will have a new family, a new home and her last name will be changed. She's lucky because she now has a family. I wish I had one. I'm happy for her but I can't help but to feel a little jealous. Everyone in the Porter House wants to get adopted, well, almost everyone.

I'm Amaryllis Porter and I don't want to be adopted and have new parents. I want my old ones but I don't know who they are or if they're alive or not but I'm sure that they loved me.

The only memory I have of my parents is the scent of liquor and a lullaby; that's how I knew that they loved me: a lullaby. It is a melody that assures a child of love and safety. It is a musical manifestation of a parent's love to a child. They love me; I'm sure of it.

I closed my eyes then I hummed my special lullaby. I recalled the scent of liquor and for a short while I could almost feel my mother's embrace and my father's touch. I bet they were warm, gentle and comforting. They must have been loving and caring.

I'll find you then we'll be a family once again. I will be your daughter and you will be my parents; we will compete each other for we will be one family . I just need to find you but I don't know where I should start. If you're alive and if you're out there, are you looking for me too?

A distant ringing called me away from my trance. That must be the dinner bell..

I rushed downstairs and headed into the dining room. The scent of pork stew filled my nostrils. I wonder if my mother can cook pork stew; I bet it would taste great. It is my favorite dish.

"Man, you look like you haven't eaten in days!" jokes Rye. He's early, I noticed that he already has a tray of food.

Rye Porter, he's a good friend of mine and the self-proclaimed leader of the Porter House. Despite being a year older than me he tends to be more immature but I like that side of him. Things are usually gloomy here in the orphanage and we'll need all of the hilarity we can get.

"Days? More like weeks." I smiled.

"You know, you're not very good in humor."

"I'm not trying to."

"Good! Well, go get yourself a tray. I'll reserve a seat for you." he says before heading off towards the tables.

I went in line to get my helping. I then noticed that the serving lady was that old woman. I don't really know her name but she happens to be one of the many adults that detests me. I guess I'll be having the bony parts of the pig once again. This isn't my lucky day.

A lot of people seem to dislike me. It's because I'm different- I look different and I act different. I have the usual gray eyes that can be usually seen from the people of the seam but they say that my mannerisms and movements are somewhat 'capitol-like' and nobody here likes the Capitol. I'm lucky to not have an accent; else everyone will shun me and make fun of my voice in the same way that they mock Effie Trinket's 'May the odds be ever in your favor.'

She scowled at me before placing some stew into my bowl then she sneered when I left. I tried to ignore her and walked towards the vacant seat between Rye and Diyella.

"The old hag hates you!" Diyella exclaims.

She's a couple of years younger than me and she's rather cheery for someone who just lost her parents. The orphanage knows of her parents so she won't need the last name 'Porter(as in Porter House) like the rest of us.

"Thanks for pointing out the obvious!" Rye says sarcastically.

"Well, it's true. That old hag hates Maryl!" she exclaims.

"Yeah, the wicked witch of the orphanage loathes her. Careful Maryl, she might put a curse on you!" Rye joked.

The two of them then laughed hysterically. The surrounding tables looked at us giving questioning looks. I looked down in embarrassment but that's the least of my concerns right now; what if she heard? She'll have our heads for sure.

"Guys, please stop that. We'll get into trouble if she hears you." I said.

"Oh you, always the good girl... Loosen up, we're just having a little fun with your arch nemesis" he smirked.

"Rye, she's not my arch nemesis and I don't think you'll find this funny when we get into trouble." I stated.

"Man, you're so uptight? I wonder where you got that; from your mom or from your dad." he said.

"I wish I knew... I wish I had more clues on their identity." I said. I'd settle for anything that can help me get to them. My lullaby and the scent of liquor isn't really enough.

"You do have more clues. Just look at yourself. You're a mass of contrasts. You have some features that proves that you are from District 12 yet your movements are Capitol-like. You act proper and polite but when someone does you or your friends harm it angers you and you become bitter and vengeful." he stated.

"Not to mention scary..." Diyella added.

He has a point. I'm 50% my dad and 50% my mom so I really am the best clue I have.

"Your a mess of opposites. Your parents must be like cats and dogs." he teased.

"But cats and dogs aren't so different. Cats are just dogs with college degrees." I joked.

"They are?" asked Diyella. That was an old joke but she seemed to have taken it seriously. Rye and I can't help but giggle at her naivety.

"So what's on our agenda for tonight?" Rye asks.

"How about we play truth or dare with John and Sheryl." Diyella suggested.

"Maybe, then we can go and finish the book Maryl suggested. That sounds like fun right?" said Rye.

"Well guys, that sounds really fun but I'm done with my meal so I think I will turn in early." I said as I rose from my seat.

"This early?" Rye questioned. We would always have a game of truth or dare with the other kids before bed, sometimes we would watch movies and at rare occasions we would go stargazing or we would read a few books. I never broke off from our routine before but now I just feel tired. I want to lay my head down my pillow and dream about my parents; if they're out there are they worried about me and the reapings?

"Yes, tomorrow is a big day. I'm kind of nervous actually." I admitted.

"It's just one slip. You're quite lucky the reapings didn't fall after your birthday. Else, you'll have more of a chance." he says.

"Yes I know but it's my first time. I'm still nervous."

"Okay, good night then..." He turned back to his meal. I could read the disappointment in his face; he never shows it but he hates having to be alone with Diyella. I'm sorry Rye, but I have made my decision.

"Good night Maryl! I'll see you tomorrow. Good luck with the reapings!" she exclaimed.

"Thanks! Good night to you too." I replied.

I did my usual routine- take a shower, brush my teeth, put on clean clothes and settle down on the bed with a good book. I looked around; no one else is going to sleep yet. I'm not really surprised, curfew is 10:30 pm and it's only 8.

I grabbed my copy of Silas Marner by George Eliot, it's a good story that I have read many times. Rye and Carissa gave it to me on my 12th birthday. It's about this miser that eventually opened up to the world thanks to his adopted daughter. It's my favorite book. I think Silas and Eppie's relationship is very sweet; they complete each other. That's why Eppie didn't have the heart to leave her adoptive father behind when she meets her true parents. That's the kind of relationship I wish to have with my parents when I meet them. I want us to be a family and something that's not so easily torn.

After going through a few pages I felt heaviness in my eyes. I closed the book shut and settled further into my bed. Tomorrow is a big day; I hope I won't be reaped. No, I'm being silly. It won't happened; I have a one in a thousand chance to be picked. It won't be me I'm sure of it...but still... I can't help but to worry.

What if I'm not the one that's reap but someone close to me is? What if it's Rye;will I have the heart to see him die on screen and he has so much to live for. What if it's my good friend Prim. No, that's impossible, she can't be reaped. She only has one slip in there like me and knowing her sister,she would undoubtedly volunteer for Prim.

I shouldn't really think about this... No one's going to the Capitol. I'm sure that everything will be alright.

I start to hum my special song. I closed my eyes and everything went dark fora brief moment. I then realized that I was back with my parents; I couldn't see their faces but I could hear their humming.

Pleasant dreams, scare away the nightmares of tomorrow...

You guys probably know where this is going...

And yes Katniss, Prim, Peeta, etc will also appear in this fic but they will be recurring characters. I'll try to give them important roles but I honestly don't have an idea on where I should place them. Well, I know where to put Prim and Katniss but Peeta, not so much.

Note: Any relation to the main character's name and that of a 'certain person' is purely coincidental.

Anyways, your reviews are much appreciated ^_^