Watching a Dancing Contest on TV

I was watching the final of Dancing with the Stars and this plot bunny hopped into my head.

Steve Rogers eyed the television warily. He was getting used to the idea of moving pictures coming into people's houses. However, he still didn't trust the content of the shows, not when a show called "The Sopranos" turned to be something that glorified mobsters and Jersey Shore had turned out to be something that glorified... Well, Steve still hadn't figured out what it had glorified.

At least he had made those discoveries on his own. He didn't want to make a fool of himself by displaying his ignorance in front of his teammates. Especially since Stark and Barton always found humor in his ignorance.

However, the only one watching this show was Banner, who was safe. Steve grinned inwardly. Well, Banner was safe when it came to displaying ignorance about current popular culture, anyway. Usually, he just avoided the TV room, but tonight there was familiar music coming from the TV Set. The phrase "Is you is, or is you ain't my baby?" was too distinctive to mistake.

Of course, it wasn't Glenn Miller's band that was playing it, but it was very well done. There was a couple apparently dancing a foxtrot. (*Well spotted!* a sarcastic voice that sounded like Barton muttered in his ear.)

Banner looked up when Steve approached the couch and sat down.

"What are you watching?" Steve asked when he was sure that he wouldn't startle the other man.

(*A television show!* was the answer that popped into Steve's mind. This sarcastic inner voice sounded like Stark.)

"It's called 'Dancing with the Stars'," Banner answered, returning his gaze to the television. He nodded in answer to Steve's unspoken question. "It's pretty much what it sounds like, a contest between celebrities and their partners, who are professional dancers who also act as their teachers."

"Ah," Steve said. He sat down to watch, spotting several errors in the dance. They probably hadn't been training for very long. However, it was watchable. He actually understood what was going on. Besides, the woman's outfit reminded him of the showgirls from that idiot show he'd been dragooned into. (*You notice girls?* Stark's sardonic voice was in his ear again.)

Steve was tempted to answer that inner voice. In spite of what Stark and Barton believed (or claimed to believe), he had a healthy interest in women. Just because he wasn't some sort of lothario didn't mean his was asexual!

However, he realized that Banner might wonder about a super soldier who talked to voices in his ear, so he said nothing. Well, not about the voices. He did make a comment about the judges' behavior, which seemed unprofessional to him.

"I think it's just part of the act," Banner said, a trifle uncertainly.

It relieved Steve to know that he wasn't the only one who had gaps in his "knowledge base," as Stark called it.

"Some of the other comments were worse. I'm afraid you came in late," Banner added.

"I see," Steve said. Banner was right, there were only two other dances before the contest ended and the announcer started summing up the results.

Steve sighed.

"Something the matter, Stevie?" This time Stark's voice was coming from behind him instead of from inside his mind. "If you want to see the entire episode, I'm sure it's online somewhere."

Steve rolled his eyes. "That's not the problem, Stark," he said.

He looked over his shoulder.

Stark raised an eyebrow and said, "Then what?"

Banner sighed, apparently worried that Steve and Stark were going to start bickering, again. "Give it a rest, Stark," he said.

"Hey, I'm trying to be nice here," Stark protested holding up his hands in a gesture of innocence.

"Didn't sound like it," Banner grunted.

"Give me a break," Stark said. "Nice doesn't come natural to me."

Steve and Banner had to grin at that. Then Steve sobered up and decided to confess to what was bothering him. "It's just that I was listening to the announcer list the participating stars and... well; I didn't recognize any of them!"

Instead of making another "cap-sicle" joke, Stark just smiled and slapped him on the shoulder. "Don't worry about it, Cap," he said. "Nobody else has heard of these so-called 'stars,' either!"