Hey :)

I am sooooo sorry for the long delay.

I have been really busy a lot lately.

Thank you though, for all the reviews, favorites, and follows.

I am so glad to see that a lot still follows this fanfic.

So, here's my chapter 19- Back on Track!

I stretch my hand to get my phone on the bedside table. Already midnight. It has been hours ago since I last saw Katniss, looking impossibly beautiful as usual. Hours ago since I have gazed at her, long enough to remember what she looks like under the moonlight, but not long enough to satisfy my hunger of her longing. Hours ago since we had a conversation, that turned into an argument, that brought tears rolling down her precious little cheeks. Hours ago when I saw Cato about to kiss Katniss, but did not saw because I ran away. But, until now, she is the only thing stuck in my mind.

I sigh and push myself to sit up.

I hate this feeling. This feeling that I am in love with a friend who loves someone close to you. Someone close to you that you know is ten times better than you, and you have no chance of competing.

What is worse, the friend I am talking about is my best friend.

I collapse again on my bed, more frustrated as the time goes by.

I throw my phone upwards, but since I wasn't using my common sense or just wasn't thinking straight, the phone fell back and hit my forehead.

"Fuck!" I cursed out loud my dog started barking.

I sat back up, rubbing my forehead. I pick up my phone, angry at it for attacking me, and threw it against the wall. The phone disassembled. But I don't have time to feel guilty about that right now. I'll be guilty about it later. Right now, I have to go somewhere.

I sprint to my feet, searching slippers, and put them on.

I don't care if it is half past midnight. I don't care if she might be sleeping or not. I don't care if it is really cold right now. I don't care if I ran out of the house in blue pajamas and black slippers. All I care about is to say my apology before it is too late.

I pass some drunken strangers before I got there. Her house is still the same as I remembered ever since the first time I saw it. One-story house. White painting. Made of wood. Small, but not the smallest. Two windows at the front. One window at the back. Three windows at the sides. Two Trash Cans at the side, one for biodegradable and one for non-biodegradable. A lady goat, tied to the front porch. And a park bench on the front porch.

What I don't remember, though, is a pretty girl lying on the park bench on the front porch, covered by a thin orange blanket that is supposed to protect her from the mosquito bites and the bitter cold. What was she thinking? She could be raped. Or worse, murdered.

I slowly step at the porch, when the door creaked open. It was her little sister.

I was about to ask what she was doing awake three fourth hours past the middle of the night, but she spoke first. "She refused to go inside. After her date left, she was out here, crying. I wanted to stay out here for her, but she insisted I go to sleep. She said that I still have school tomorrow." She chuckled at the thought.

I know she laughed because she wants to convince me that she is alright, but she isn't. Even with the dim moonlight, I could see her eyes are red, both from the tears that damaged her and from the tears she rubbed away. She is a good actress, though. If it wasn't for the small amount of light, I would have been literally convinced that she is alright.

"But no school is worth my sister." She continues. "She might not know, but I was just behind the window, watching for her. Hoping nothing bad would happen to her." She's crying. "This is the second time I have seen her so broken. The first is when our father died." She looks at me, her innocent bright blue eyes sparkling under the moonlight. "What happened, Peeta?"

I could not say, even if I wanted to admit my wrong doing. I stretched my arms wide open, proposing a hug for her. She wrapped her arms around me, and there she cried, silent sobs. "Oh, Primrose." I whisper. "The girl who cried when her sister cried… I promise, I would look out for her this time."

"No. Not only this time. Promise me you would look out for her everyday, even when things get complicated." She whispers back before she unwrap her arms around me to wipe away her tears.

I smile at her. "Everyday." I promised. "Where's your mother?"

"Working. She is on night shift this time. From 10 in the evening until 9 in the morning, then she is also taking extra shifts because we badly need money. It almost seems like she lives there already. But I could still feel her presence." She says as she points at her heart.

I smile and set her off to bed.

She brought me a cup of coffee before she went back to bed, while I stayed out here on the front porch, right next to Katniss.

I watch her while she sleeps. She looks so peaceful without that occasional scowl on her face. I smile, remembering all the smiles she had unconsciously shown me. I trail my fingers down her arm, to her fingers. I remember how right it felt when they were between mine. I tuck her hair behind her ear. I'd love her hair in any style. My eyes travel to her lips. I remember how it felt against mine. Even if it was just one time and an accident. It is still an amazing accident.

I must have dozed off, because the next time I saw her, I wake up with her head leaning on my shoulder. She's sitting next to me right now. Both of us are now covered by the orange blanket. When I look at her, I notice her eyes are still closed. She must have dozed off again.

The air has gone cooler and the sky has gone darker. Now I feel guilt about throwing my phone, I don't have a clock to check the time anymore.

I look at her again and feel that weird feeling at the pit of my stomach. That weird feeling I always have whenever she's around. I put an arm around her. I don't even care if she's seeing my cousin. Another feeling overtook me. Guilt. What am I saying? He's my best cousin.

Before I remove my arm around her shoulder, I tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear again. After I removed my arm around her shoulder, that is when she shifts her head on my shoulders as if to find a more comfortable spot to place it. She's awake.

"Why did you stay here? Outside?" I ask her.

"I might ask you the same question." She told me.

Besides loving you with all my heart, I have another reason. "You might get raped. Someone has to protect you if that happens." I told her.

"Oh." Is all she says.

The silence after that is uncomfortable. We just quarreled, and yet, here we are sitting beside each other.

I tried to break the silence. "You didn't answer my question." She didn't answer, until I realized the answer to the question was obvious.

I blushed. It is lucky that it is dark right now. "How did you know I would come?"

Minutes later, she answered. "I didn't. I just assumed."

Another silence followed.

"I'm sorry." She whispered.

I kiss her forehead and whisper, "I'm sorry."

We both watched the sky turn from pitch black, into a soft shade of pink and purple, into sky blue. Neither of us breaks the silence. We just sit there, leaning to each other.

After the sun has fully rose up, I went back home to get ready for school.

"Peeta! Peeta!" I was sitting on the lunch table with Katniss, Madge and Gale when hear something loud running to me. Something red. It is Delly. "Peeta! Guess who just asked me to prom."

I guffawed. "Who the hell would ask you?" I joked. She blushed.

A crease forms in the middle of her brow. "Laugh all you want Mellark! But someone actually asked me out." She folds her arms in front of her chest, with a proud smile on her lips.

I laugh again. "Who? Your brother?" I ask as I sip from my water bottle.

She smiled. "No. Not my brother." She says as she sits down next to me. Her smile is teasing and somewhat keeping a secret. Finally she says who the guy. I think I almost died when I choked on my food after hearing the words, "Your brother."

We had to get out right now because we are now the center of attraction in the cafeteria.

Once we were out of the building, we sat beside a tree outside the school. That is our usual place, nowadays.

"When? How?" I still can't believe it. My brother. My childish one heck of a flirt brother would ask a girl on Prom. And not just any girl. Delly.

The four of them are laughing at me now because of my reaction. Who could anyone find this news funny?

"Hmm... When? Well, just yesterday. And how? Well. Do you remember when we had a little kiss on the stage, at the play. Well, after the play, he kind of confessed that he was a bit jealous when I kept on asking him what was wrong. I know! I was a bit surprised myself." She chattered excitedly, her smile reaching her ears.

"So later that night, I was still in shock. But then I realized, it was kind of obvious." She continued to babble. "Do you remember when we were in elementary? He gave me my first valentines gift when we were still in second grade. When I was a freshman in high school, he baked me a chocolate cake saying "GoodLuck!". On my second year, he was my first kiss because I was just desperate to know what it feels like, and he volunteered. When we fought, he gave me a bouquet of flowers with a note 'Sorry for what my brother had done'. So yeah. He was obvious."

She's right. He is obvious. But why hadn't I noticed it before? The first time he was baking a cake, it was a chocolate cake. He said it was for someone special. So I thought it might be for someone I know nothing about. The next day, Delly had chocolate cake for desert.

"So at night, I thought and thought of the moments we both had, and I realized, hey... Maybe I like him too. So when he asked if he could walk me home, I said yes, and thought I ought to give him a chance, after all. When we were already approaching, I was really surprised with what I saw. Petals, covering the ground. Nothing to see but petals. The only place that is not covered with petals has spelled the words P-R-O-M-?" She said with a blush, and Madge begins to smile. Katniss, however, looks really bored talking about boys.

I smile at her reaction.

"And I thought, hey, he deserves at least one date. So I said yes." She finished the story then giggled. Her face is flushed, and a huge smile is glued to her face.

I, however, did not still recover. "Wow. That was... wow." I said, sighing.

She rolled her eyes at me, then said, "Just because you can't find the courage to ask the girl you love to prom, doesn't mean he can't too."

This time, I was the one to blush.

Madge and Gale laughed. Katniss, on the other hand, just stared at me. I could see her eyes trained on me with the corner of my eye.

She seems to be observing me.

Again, that feeling whenever she is near overtakes me. This time, it is stronger than before. My hands began to sweat. I know Delly is giving a hint to me, she's probably yelling "ASK HER TO PROM, NOW!" inside her head right now. She raises an eyebrow and a playful smile dances on her lips. I am right. That is what she is trying to say.

Later. I try to tell her, and gladly, she nods.

Five minutes before the bell, I gathered all my courage to tap her shoulder and ask her. But I guess I took longer than I realized. The bell has rang, which means she wont have anything in her mind right now except to study. Especially when the end of the school year comes, just weeks away now.

So I decided, I'll ask her later when last period is over.

It's now or never. I tell myself as I walk up to her.

I tap her shoulder which makes her to turn around. Her hair flips and leaves me mouth-opened.

She raises an eyebrow. "Yes?" She asks, as she shifts the books she carries.

My heartbeat begins to increase, and I begin to sweat. "I-I uhhmm" I stuttered and gulped. This was getting more nerve wrecking than before. "I-uhh... was wondering if-"

My prepared failed speech was cut off by the honking of a horn by a car. I see who it is. Cato.

He gets out of the car and open the door for Katniss. She gives me a hug of goodbye before running of to Cato. Wherever they might be going, I won't know.

When I get home, I see Cato and Katniss on the just outside the door of our house. I am a bit broken hearted to see that blush on her face. Knowing that I am not the person causing it. I know I am being selfish, but that is the one sin I would commit if it comes to having her.

"Hey!" I hear Katniss giggle as Cato tickles her. "Stop it." She giggles more.

I know it is bad to eavesdrop, but I can't help it. I hide behind the tree that is wide enough for them not to see me, but close enough for me to hear them. This must be the worst decision I have done. I am hurting myself more. I am the only one to blame.

"Stop it!" Katniss shrieks with joy.

Cato stops tickling her, and chuckle himself. "Okay, okay." After that, he looks at her with serious eyes. "He-hey... I want to ask you something. Well, it's not actually asking, more of like... hmmm, proposing?"

I held my breath at the last word that Cato said. What does he mean?

I sneaked a peek at Katniss, and saw that her face is in a deep shade of fuchsia. "Whu-what do you mean?" She stutters.

Cato reached out for Katniss' hand and made her blush deeper. My blood is boiling, but I feel agony in my heart. This can't be happening. They're too young. I haven't even got a chance. That's not true though. I had all the chances in the world, but just didn't take it.

"I know that we have just met, but there's just something about you that makes me the happiest man on Earth by just seeing you. You have came in my life when I least expected you to. And I am never letting you go." Cato says, both of them staring at the other's eye. "I am leaving soon, though. This week's Friday." Prom night, I thought. "So, if I might ask you one question. Just one. And only one answer must be said, would you tell me the answer right away?"

I could feel my heart breaking, cracking. All the pieces falling, one by one. All of the pieces fall on my stomach, causing the sharp edges to dig deeper, causing my stomach to twist. The lack of oxygen being pumped damages my brain, making all the things around me a big blur. I can't even breathe properly right now. I take bigger amount of inhales than exhales. My knees begin to weaken, and a pain starts from the tips of my fingers making their way into me, damaging my whole body. Damaging me.

I can't look at them anymore, but I hear Katniss say, "That depends on the question if I would answer right away or not. What is the question?" I force to stop the tears forming in my eyes. I won't let a girl damage me. But then again, one already has.

A loud motorcycle passes by, causing me not to hear the question. But I hear Cato saying, "Think about it. Okay?"

"Okay." She says.

I look back and see Cato entering the house, and Katniss walking this way. Of course, this way is the way to the Seam.

She looks at the ground while walking to her home. She didn't even notice me. So I pass her again, trying to sound casual. "Hey." I say, startling her.

She looks at me as if she doesn't know me, then somehow recognizes who I am. "Oh, hey." She says, while tucking the loose strand of her hair behind her ear. "I wanna tell you something."

I know already. "Sure, what is it?"

"Cato, he... He kind of asked me to come with him. Because, of course, you might already know that he is leaving on Saturday since he is your cousin." I just nod. "So he asked me to come with him, and be with him there. Forever."

I cannot take it any longer. "No." I say, my voice dropped an octave. I then continue walking my way to my house.

"Wait... what?!" She says as she grabs my wrist, pulling me back to face her.

I sigh. "No. Don't go with him." And I continue on my way.

She grabs my shoulders this time, making me face her again. "But why?" She asks.

I should have said this a long time ago. Should have never delayed the moment I felt and realized it. This might not be the right time, but she asked, so I'll answer.

"Because I love you."

HEY! :)

So that's it for Chapter 19-Back on track.

I hope you all enjoyed it. And I hope I didn't loose any followers because of the long delay.

Anyways. Please do Review. I love looking at your reviews. :)