Hmm. I apologize in advance.
"Hey," she says.
She doesn't get a response. She's not sure if she still really expects one or not.
She sits down. Her fingers run through the grass beneath her. She's stalling. She knows it. They always play this game. She looks up at the sky. "It's a beautiful day," she says, taking in the soft sun.
She used to hate days like this. Gray skies, rain, thunderous storms; those used to be her kind of day. Now she's learned to like, even love, new things. These were her kind of days.
She looks over at her now, a sad smile on her face. It was an improvement; from a heartbroken face with no smile, to a heartbroken smile, to a sad smile. Would it ever be better? She wasn't sure she wanted it to be.
"Beck and Tori are getting married," she tells her; then chuckles.
"Can you believe that?" she asks, shaking her head.
She looks down at the hand that plays with the grass. "I would have married you," she says, "I would have."
She was going to in fact. There had been no doubt in her mind. "Do you think I'll ever get married?" she asks, glancing over at her.
She shakes her head again. "No, I suppose not," she answers her own question and looks ahead.
They sit in silence for a while. Trying her hardest not to wish the silence only came from her. "You know I still love you, right?" she asks, after a moment.
She bends her knees and rests her arms on them. "Sometimes I worry you forget. There are moments, moments when I am able to think about other things. You move to the back of my mind. And I worry, worry that I forget."
Silence again.
"But I do love you, Cat. I'll never stop. No matter what happens, I'll always be yours," she says; the last of her words strained as they force their way out of her constricted throat.
She takes in a breath. Blinks to still the tears that threaten to fall. Once she's calm she looks over at her and smiles. A sad smile, but a very loving smile. She leans over and traces the lettering.
Caterina Valentine
Beloved daughter, sister, friend, lover
A bright sunlight shining on a dark world, a glimmering star to guide us home
She leans her forehead against the tombstone. Then kisses it. "I'll see you later," she says, stroking the stone with her thumb.