As I said in the summary, this is the place where I've decided to dump all my shorter fills for kink meme prompts - by "shorter" I mean less than 1,000 words or so. The kind of fills that are more snippets than self-contained stories.

Despite the nature of a kink meme, there will be no smut. Most probably all of these will be humorous, and romances, if there are any, will not be described in any lewd detail so have no fears about reading. If there is any need for a warning (of any kind), I'll add it above the ficlet. You can however expect consistent spoilers for at least the characters of all games, if not specific trial mentions.

So, without further ado, let's get this started!

Prompt: Klavier/Polly. As in the parrot.

Animal Magnetism

Klavier grinned charmingly, leaning forward on one hand. He looked like he was flirting at a bar rather than questioning a witness in a murder trial, and the sound of swooning women filled the audience.

"Your name, Fraulein?" he purred.

From the consultant's seat in the defense box, Phoenix Wright spoke up. "Oh, that won't work. You've got to use its name or it won't answer. You have to call it -"

"Polly!" Squawked the parrot suddenly, flapping its wings and ducking its head bashfully. Apollo stared, but as the bird began to peek up at the still-smiling prosecutor before quickly hiding its head under its - or rather her wing again, he felt himself starting to blush on its behalf. He had plenty of experience being flustered by Klavier himself... as did most of the world when Klavier looked at them like that, but still, this was a bit much.

Klavier thought so too, judging by the way his smile hitched a bit before he resumed his questions. Throughout the whole process, the parrot at the stand was very cooperative. Perhaps a bit... too cooperative; by the time his cross-examination came around, Apollo had to take a deep breath to stifle his laughter before beginning his own enquiries.

Polly turned her head haughtily away (one eye cracked open and trained on Klavier), and did not answer, until Apollo finally took Phoenix's advice and prefaced every new statement with her name - and even then, the responses were short and blunt. It was a little frustrating to be treated so rudely, but the consternation on Klavier's face when Polly was released from the cross-examination only to flap straight to him and attempt to nibble his ears was definitely worth it.

"Er... Fraulein, please," Klavier hemmed, awkwardly trying to fend off the amorous avian's advances while still maintaining his trademark charm and courtesy, "I don't... um... Ah - your wing's getting in my eye -"

Apollo had never seen a more beautiful sight, and spent the next month telling Klavier that this was exactly why he always told him not to flirt with witnesses, and teasing him about his "animal magnetism". Once again, the slightly confused blush on Klavier's face was hilarious - smooth talker though the prosecutor was, having a parrot fall for his charms was a little more than even he could handle, and he eventually agreed to tone it down.

The only downside to the whole affair was when Phoenix relayed the tale to Trucy, who promptly began to crack jokes about 'Klavier and Polly perching in a tree' while shooting meaningful glances at Apollo.

PS - it messed with the flow to add it, but my other option for Trucy-teasing was: "Polly want a Klavier?"

...Heh.