I've not written anything like this before, with my background being in screenwriting. Decided to practise both writing in prose and female characterisation, and what better character than Miss Lawson?

Feedback and constructive criticism welcome, in all regards. Apologies in advance if I keep coming back and tweaking bits here and there, as I'm still hammering out some of the story details.

Enjoy!

Prologue

I'm telling him he doesn't have to go, though I'm aware that won't convince him. Not even I believe the words. Am I just talking to fill the silence? He's too quiet. Something's wrong.

When it comes to the Reapers, there is no choice. I would've done exactly the same, without a second thought. It's about the bigger picture.

His head drops, it all weighs heavy on him. Why did he have to go alone? One moment, he's off to rescue a friend; the next, he's destroyed the Alpha Relay and a star system along with it.

Yes, I understand. Someone's got to take the blame. Now is not the time for war with the batarians.

A rush of blood to the head, gripping his arms, I make a foolish suggestion: run. We know what's at stake, and we've got the ship; we can strike out on our own.

He's taking my hands in his, telling me it's going to be all right. I believe him. I have to.

Chapter One

The view's beautiful, I can say that much.

Countless shuttles make their way across the Illium skyline; all in orderly lanes. Something about this I find soothing, hypnotic almost. Bright, soundless objects drifting against a purple backdrop, above and between architecture so varied and beautiful.

The past couple of months have left me directionless, lacking in structure. For the whole of my life, I've had a purpose, whether I liked it or not. Without Cerberus, without the Normandy and crew, I'm alone. And it feels so stupid to admit it, even to myself. I don't have any friends, and I'm not too good at making them. Or keeping them. I know how to manipulate, how to command. How to use.

In Shepard's absence, the crew had disbanded. For some, it was only ever a short tenure, but for me it had become a home; as much a home as I'd ever have anyway. They'd done their part in the fight against the Collectors. Some of them even took orders from me, if only for a short while. They never liked me, but I could tell they respected my leadership. I'd be lying if I said it had ever been any different.

Thankfully, I'm not completely alone. I have Ori, bless her. Of course, that's another distant relationship, quite literally. But it's enough. Heaven knows, I'd probably fall apart without her right now.

I snap myself out of a daydream; I'm watching the shuttles again when I should be checking the faces of the people passing by. Not that I was hoping to recognise anyone; quite the opposite, in fact. I can't afford to let my guard down, even for a second.

The news continues its loop once again. My routine has brought me here on a few occasions, listening for any information on the Alliance, never visiting the same place too often or too long. I'm afraid to use the extranet here. Illium's a good place for becoming anonymous; I just don't trust the security. That's something I'll have to handle myself.

Over my shoulder, I catch a man studying me from further down the balcony; pupils dilated, lips parted. I stand straight and meet his sunken eyes with a stern look. A smirk creeps onto his face, allaying my fears: he's leering. Not an uncommon sight, but an unwelcome one at this particular moment. He's harmless, but it's time to move on; I'm attracting too much attention. I need a new location, one with a view.