"I can never forget you, Joy"

Those were the exact same words that you told me. Did those words mean nothing to you?

I turned back on him and was ready to leave everything behind, when he grabbed my arm and I spun back, facing him.

"Joy.." he said in a low voice

"I get it Fabian" I began, trying to hold my tears "You love Nina, not me"

"I'm sorry" He loosen his grip on my arm "It's just-"

"Just tell me one thing" I said cutting him off

"What?" he replied, his gaze not leaving my eyes.

"What we had.." I gulped "before the whole mystery thing, before she came along. Did it mean nothing to you?"

"Joy..it's not like that" he said gently. "It's just, Nina she's just-"

"Enough!" I said almost yelling, I cringe at the mention of her name "I get it, I'm not Nina and I will never be like her" The truth leaves a bitter taste on my mouth "But, didn't I even pop into your mind, when I was missing or was she the only thing you thought of?"

He stood there in silence, he didn't answer my question, I took this as a yes and walked away slowly before I felt my tears escaping my eyes, I ran outside, away from the house.

Maybe Nina is just better than me, maybe that's why he broke up with me. People don't know that me and Fabian were a couple, we couldn't tell anyone, especially Patricia and Amber because they would just make a big deal out of it.

I can see the spark in Fabians eyes when his with Nina, the spark in his eyes that I used to be the cause of. Everyone seems so happy that they are together. And I tried my best to do the same. But I couldn't.

I bit my lower lip, not recognizing that it was already bleeding. I wondered in the forest near campus and stopped at a tree; I slid down and pulled my knees to my cheeks. I felt someone in front of me, was it him, did he follow me here?

"Fabian?" I asked looking up to only find emptiness.

I was alone. I just remembered that I'm not his. I'm on my own now. I caress my waist that was always been a place when his hand is around me, gave the warmth that I always looked forward to.

"Why?" I asked

"I can't be with you anymore Joy, we are so different and we can't be together. We have to break up."

"It's because of her, isn't it?" My tears rolled down my face.

He simply nodded. "Sorry" he said looking at the ground not meeting my eyes

"Okay, if that's what you want." I said trying to smile

"Really?" he asked hopefully

"Yeah, just do me a favor" I replied

"What is it?" he asked with a smile

"Just..don't forget me, yeah?" I sighed

"I could never forget you, Joy" he replied gently taking hold of my hand.

I flinched slightly, know that this is going to be the closes it's going to get; we will never go back to our old ways.

The night time came and it started to rain, I went back to the house, I entered from the back entrance; I saw all of my housemates having supper, having their conversations.

Did they even notice that I was gone? I snapped out of my trance when Trudy's voice rang from behind me. I forced a weak smile before she asked why was I soaking wet, I lied that I got lost in the woods. She shot me a sympathetic smile before sending me to my room to dry off.

I change my clothes before heading downstairs; I took my sit next to Patricia. I played with the food on my plate; I wasn't hungry. All I could think about was when I was trapped in my house away from my friends and Fabian, I waited and hoped that when the time came and I returned, everything would be the same and maybe me and Fabian could finally come out as a couple. I was wrong, everything had change.

After dinner I was in my room alone, Patricia was with Nina and Amber in their room. I heard voices outside my room, I knew those voices anywhere. I opened my door and saw Nina and Fabian outside of her room.

"Night" she said to him

He kissed her new girlfriend while I watched from a distance. It's like I'm seeing myself, the kiss that used to warms my lips, now owned by another person. Unconsciously, I traced my lips with my finger, recalling the warmth that was given by him, hoping someday it will be mine again.

She closes the door and he headed for the stairs.

"I still love you Fabe's" I said almost yelling. He froze and turned back to see me crying. "Why did it have to end?" I whispered.

I didn't wait for an answer and returned to my room. I tried to cry again but nothing came out, I couldn't cry anymore. I crawled to the corner of my bed. I took something from my side drawer.

By morning, the house was filled with police, a medical team carrying my dead body to a carriage. The police reading the note I wrote before I slashed my neck with a knife, to Trudy and my fellow housemates.

I'll let you go

I'll let you fly

Now that I found

A way to keep somehow
More than a broken vow

Gosh

that was sh*t

It's a little bit depressing and rushed~