Summary

Orihara Izaya has romantic feelings for Heiwajima Shizuo in the depths of his subconscious, but refuses to admit it. Further, the strongman is still hunting him down, so he needs some sort of defense against Shizuo. After learning of a chat-bot website that grants any wish, he attempts it for fun - wishing there was something that can save him from a terrible death by Shizuo. Ironically, Izaya turns into a girl the next morning. This curse that suddenly came upon him will lead him into a mess of hilarious and romantic encounters – especially with Shizuo.

Chapter One: What is This Witchcraft?

Ikebukuro followed its usual routine every day. Everyone was back to normal since the Yellow Scarves disbanded. But, it cannot be said that the district was at peace and quiet.

Every now and then, Heiwajima Shizuo would spot Orihara Izaya somewhere and throw something ridiculously heavy at him. In the end, the crafty informant would escape – leaving an irritated bartender-bodyguard. It is thrilling in a way, Izaya thought, running away from a horrible beating. Or maybe it was also his envy for Shizuo which slowly turned to admiration – it's a secret that he vowed he would never tell. After all, all humans love him and he loves them in return, except for Shizuo…or so he thought.

Even though there were too many close calls for his liking, Izaya loved picking on Shizuo. The bartender grew on him ever since the day Shinra introduced them. But, this touchy-feely, romantic emotion was just too foreign for him – it's demeaning for his pride after all. So, he crammed this unrequited romance deep into his subconscious.

He was still hell bent on awakening Celty's head, which he believes will take him to the glorious Norse Heaven, Valhalla, when he does. However, there is always a chance that this plan would not work out so well. So, deep down in his subconscious, Izaya considered a second goal in life which was forcefully emerging up to his daily thoughts: trying to fall in love. These new romantic feelings are as unpredictable as Shizuo. So he hates them for that reason. Eventually, it got too confusing; too uncomfortable. He swatted away those thoughts and resumed being chased by Shizuo rather than chasing him.

"Wait right there, asshat! IZAYAAA!" Shizuo wrenched off a road sign to serve as his weapon. While chasing down the black-coated figure in the distance, he spun the road sign around violently. "Damn you! I'm going to kill you for good this time!"

"That's what you said last time," Izaya chuckled back while swerving a corner.

"You little PEST!" When Shizuo dashed around the corner too, he stopped in his tracks. He ended up in a less noisy street, but Izaya was nowhere to be found – he lost him again. "Damn it, you bastard!"

III

"Phew! What a workout," Izaya laughed away his exhaustion.

He stumbled into his apartment and sprawled himself out over the couch.

"I hate to admit it, but I wish there was some sort of defense against that Shizu-chan sometimes." He exhaled deeply and fanned himself with his hand.

III

It was a little past midnight. The lights in Izaya's apartment were the only ones still lit. The crafty man sat before his laptop, visiting forums out of boredom, like usual. On a side window, he opened a chat with Celty and Mikado. By now, they knew who was behind which screen name. Regardless, they played along like nothing happened.

[Mikado] Tanaka-Tarou: Hey! There's a rumour going around at my school that there's a really fishy website that is said to grant your wishes.

[Celty] Setton: Eh, really? How so?

[Izaya] Kanra: LOL No way! OAO It must be a scam.

[Mikado] Tanaka-Tarou: Apparently, people at my school have tried it, but they got something totally unexpected along with their wish.

[Celty] Setton: What do you mean 'unexpected'?

[Mikado] Tanaka-Tarou: Well, I overheard a classmate say that she wished to find her long lost father again.

[Izaya] Kanra: Uh huh?

[Mikado] Tanaka-Tarou: And she really did find him again! But, the police had to dig him out from the ground. It was that mystery case.

[Celty] Setton: Oh! How terrible! Yeah…now I remember - I saw it on the news.

[Izaya] Kanra: Huh, you sure it wasn't just a fluke?

[Mikado] Tanaka-Tarou: No, it's the talk of my school. People have been going to that website and getting unexpected results from their wishes. Isn't it more than a coincidence?

[Izaya] Kanra: That IS fishy. How does the site work?

[Mikado] Tanaka-Tarou: You basically talk to a chat-bot named 'Circe'.

[Celty] Setton: Circe? Like the enchantress in Greek mythology? She is said to be a very tricky woman…she even transforms anyone who offends her into animals.

[Izaya] Kanra: My, you are very knowledgeable, Setton-san. ^_^

[Celty] Setton:…..

[Izaya] Kanra: Well, that was some interesting information. Anyway, I'm going to go sleep. I'm tired. Bye bye! ^o^

[Kanra has signed out]

"Circe, huh?" Izaya wore his cunning, devilish grin again and typed 'Circe chat-bot' into the search bar. "Let's see just how genuine this is," he muttered as he clicked the first site listed.

A beige parchment background plastered onto the screen; a drawing of a stunningly beautiful woman in flowing ivory robes loaded on the left side of the page. Her crystal blue eyes were animated to blink every so often. She held a golden chalice filled with a sparkling, rosy liquid in one hand. Once the page finished loading completely, a text box opened over her body.

"Welcome, guest. I am Circe, the enchantress residing on the isle of Aeaea. I grant one wish to every visitor." Her speech appeared above the text box in golden letters.

"Heh." Izaya sneered at the screen, then typed, "It could be any wish?"

"It could be any wish," the chat-bot responded.

"Looks like a regular chat-bot to me." He pouted in disappointment. "They're usually programmed to turn questions into sentences and vice versa. But can't handle complex phrases."

Still interested, he proceeded to talk more with Circe.

"I'm having trouble with a guy named Heiwajima Shizuo who's out to kill me. I wish there was some way I could defend myself against him without inflicting any harm to me."

He pressed the 'enter' button and waited for her answer. After a few seconds, she responded.

"How troublesome for you. There is a way to defend yourself against him without inflicting any harm to you. Very well, your wish is granted. Rest one night."

As Izaya finished reading the response, the internet disconnected and the disconnection message popped up. Even he was taken aback by the odd phenomena.

"How interesting." He chuckled. "It seems genuine enough." He closed his laptop and got up from his chair. "Geez, if only I wished instead for a meteor to drop on Shizu-chan's house…"

He walked over to the light switch and flicked it down. "…Just kidding!"

III

"Mmmmm…" Izaya stretched his arms over his head. He lazily got out of bed and drew the curtains to see the morning sun.

He walked into the small corridor connected to the bathroom and passed by the large mirror on the right wall. Letting out a yawn, he glanced at his reflection out of his periphery then proceeded to the bathroom.

But wait…he thought he saw a girl in the mirror. Groggily, he retraced his steps to the mirror; he could not believe his eyes. There he was in the reflection, but with a petite figure, black hair down to his shoulder blades, and cute small breasts. Not only that, but he was wearing female attire: He had the same trademark black jacket covering a black v-neck t-shirt, and black short shorts.

Izaya stared dumbfounded at his reflection. Now that he noticed, he was also about 5 inches shorter in height. He combed his fingers all the way through the long strands of his hair and poked his breasts twice.

"You-you've got to be…kidding." He stepped back from the mirror and stroked his throat in surprise. His voice was now in the female register. Without a thought, he pinched his cheeks hard. "Iz a dweam!"

Izaya's eyes shot wide open. Surely, it was a dream and he breathed a sigh of relief. But just to make sure, he lazily groped around his chest; there were STILL TWO SMALL BREASTS. He sat up fast enough to swing his bed covers over; he looked down and found a slender pair of legs – cleanly shaven. Not to mention, there was more free space between his thighs now.

He began to sweat, and in a trembled, higher-pitched voice he managed to utter: "What is this witchcraft?"