A/N: Alright, so new Shawn story... Yay, and all that... Even though I haven't finished Life Of Lies... Well... Anyways, um, usual warnings apply to this... Or at least, my usual warnings... Mentions of child abuse, alcohol abuse, mentions of rape, prescription drug abuse, self-mutilation, depression, etc, etc. Dark dark stuff, kiddies. Read at your own risk.

Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing other than the story line, which I'm sure someone else has already written something similar to. I don't own Psych, or any of the characters from Psych. They're all the product of the directors and producers of the show, who make money off of the show. I, on the other hand, do not make any money for this. Meaning there's no copyright infringement. Teehee.

It was nearly three o'clock in the morning when a quiet tapping sound on Gus's window made him sit up, instantly awake. It took him a moment to realize that the hideous looking… thing… at his window was actually his best friend, rubbing his face all over the glass and making faces.

"Shawn, what the hell are you doing?" The seventeen year old hissed, getting up, and opening the window. "Are you crazy?"

Shawn Spencer scoffed, and nearly fell over as he climbed into the bedroom. "Don't be ridunkulous, Guster… I'm obviously climbing… climbing up your… your… your… stupid, fence like white thing –"

"The lattice," Gus supplied with an eye roll.

"Yes! Yes, the… the lettuce! I'm climbing up the lettuce to get to your room… because… your room is clearly on the… on the… not bottom floor of this… this mansion like house," Shawn said with a laugh, throwing his arms out to encompass the supposed enormity of the house, and nearly falling over again.

Gus grabbed him, and pushed him into the chair with a sigh. "Shawn… Do I even need to ask if you've been drinking?"

"Of course… I haven't been… Well, yeah… I'm drinking. Was drinking? Yup," Shawn confirmed, nodding his head. "I am definitely drunk, man," He said with a giggle.

"Dammit, Shawn…" Gus muttered. "Why do you keep doing this to yourself?"

Shawn stuck his tongue out at him. " 'Cause… It's fun, Gussy. Gussy Poo. You should… Should… Loosen up… Have fun… You're no fun, Gus-meister." He giggled again, as Gus sighed.

"Where's your dad, Shawn?"

Shawn rolled his eyes, as he flopped back in the chair, a petulant pout coming to his lips. "Out… 'saving the city', or something. Last… last I knew… He was… was on a… a… cookout… No, stakeout!"

"And just when the hell was that?"

Shawn shrugged, and yawned. "I… I dunno," He said thickly. "A few days ago? Right after he… he freaking… arrested me."

"He what?" Gus exclaimed loudly.

"Shhh! You'll wake… wake up your parents… Burton. What kind of a name is Burton, anyways? Apparently… your parents… don't like you… any more than they like me… namin' you… Burton."

"It's a family name, Shawn. We've been over this. And my parents don't not like you. And what do you mean he arrested you?"

Shawn sighed, and started making weird hand motions with his left hand. "I might have… maybe… helped my at the time… girlfriend –"

"Amanda Detweiler?"

"No. Try and keep up, Gus, Mandy was… last Friday. This was… Wednesday."

"So who were you with?"

"Not sure. That… That freaky chick with… the black make up. And the black hair. And the black clothes. One of those ones. Dunno which one… But one of 'em."

Gus rolled his eyes. Shawn seemed to go through a girl a day sometimes, and still somehow came out smelling like roses. All the girls he'd been with still talked to him (for the most part), and considered him a friend. Even when he couldn't remember their names, he thought sighing.

"Alright. So you helped your Wednesday girlfriend…?"

"Oh… yeah, we uh… Well she… hotwired her neighbor's car… And we might have went joyriding."

"You stole a car? Shawn, what the hell is wrong with you, huh?"

Instantly, the laughing, joking Shawn vanished. Gus almost shivered at how quickly Shawn's face went dark, his normally playful green eyes shifting to a much darker color, almost black in his anger. Gus had seen his best friend 'go dark' as the other kids at school referred to it, but never that quickly.

Never aimed at him.

"Shawn, just rel –"

"Shut up, Gus. You know what? This was a mistake. I shouldn't have come here."

Almost before the words were out of his mouth, Shawn had shimmied back through the window, and climbed down the lattice, and disappeared into the dark night.

Gus didn't know it would be the last time he would see his friend in seven years.

At twenty-five years old, Burton Guster was pretty damn pleased with his life. Making 40K a year, pretty cushy job that didn't involve any physical labor…

He smiled as he leaned back in his chair, glancing out the large window of his office. The view definitely was another job perk. From this vantage point, he had a great view of Santa Barbara. Granted, it wasn't as good as the ones from the top offices, but his office on the seventh story weren't anything to complain about.

Yup. Gus's life was going pretty good.

"Hey, Gussie Poo!"

Gus nearly fell out of his chair, and spun around.

"Excuse me, who are you?" He demanded of the young man lazily leaning against his door. He clearly didn't work in the building, and it was even more obvious he wasn't a doctor. In fact, between the light brown leather jacket, the dark clothes, and the ear piercing, he wondered if the man was there to rob him. "These offices are private; no visitors allowed. I'm afraid you'll have to leave."

The young, brunette gave him a cheeky smile. "Gus-ikens, I'm hurt. Right here," He said, pointing to the right side of his chest. "Or… right here. Or wherever the heart is. I come back to town for the sole purpose of seeing you, and I'm not allowed to visit?"

Gus squinted, disbelieving. "Shawn? Shawn Spencer?"

The cheeky smile grew into a full-fledged grin. "The one and only, buddy."

"Oh my god, it is you. Shawn!"

Shawn laughed as Gus embraced him tightly. "Easy, Gus," He wheezed good-naturedly.

Gus instantly drew back. "You alright?"

Gus barely noticed the minute hesitation, before Shawn laughed again, and swatted him on the back.

"What? Of course I'm okay! I'm just sore from a twelve hour ride. On my motorcycle," Shawn said, his voice low and adventurous.

"Your motorcycle? For real?" Gus held up one hand to stop himself. "Wait; why don't you go outside and wait a minute. Just let me sign out early, and we'll go grab a bite to eat."

Shawn smiled, and embraced him tightly. "Sounds great, Gus. I'll be waiting."

Gus watched as Shawn practically bounced down the hallway towards the elevators, before whispering, "I missed you, Shawn."

It was nearly twenty minutes later that the two old friends sat outside of their favorite restaurant, two plates of jerked chicken and potatoes sitting in front of them.

Shawn dug into his food like a man starving, moaning as he took his first bite.

"Oh man, Gus… I forgot how great this place was. Never found a place that did jerked chicken as good as here."

Gus saw it as the perfect opportunity. "Where'd you go looking?"

Shawn grinned at him. "Not the most subtle way of asking, but I'll give you kudos for the effort," He said with a laugh, before growing serious again. "But uh… Really, I went just about everywhere. Never really stayed in one place for more than a week usually," He said, shrugging uncomfortably. "Longest time was in Pittsburgh for a few months."

Gus stared at him in surprise. "How'd you make any money? Where'd you go after you left? Hell, scratch that, why did you leave?"

Shawn rolled his eyes as he took another big bite of his food. After swallowing, he said, "I left 'cause I wasn't gonna stick around and wait for Henry to arrest me again. And the first place I went was up to Washington. Tried my mom's house, but she was on one of her trips."

Gus waited for more details, but by the way Shawn set his jaw, and then dug into his food, he knew none were forthcoming. He briefly debated about trying to force Shawn to talk, but didn't really give it much thought. He wasn't going to risk him running again.

So instead, he asked, "Have you seen either of your parents?"

Shawn shrugged. "Nope."

Gus's eyes nearly flew off his head in surprise. "Are you serious! I thought it was just me you didn't contact! You're tellin' me that nobody's heard from you until last year?"

Shawn shrugged again. "Wasn't like it was any great loss. Notice just about everybody continued on without me," He said bitterly.

"Don't even try and lay the guilt trip on me, Shawn! Or anybody for that matter! Your mother came back here after you went missing; we all spent months trying to find you. Your father had everyone out looking for you. Hell, he managed to get it out on the news! I posted flyers everywhere! And every single time somebody called and said they thought they saw you, your dad and me went all over God's good creation to follow the leads! For almost a year, Shawn!

"Do you even know where your dad is? I know you don't, because nobody else does either! About a year after you went missing, he packed everything up in his truck, and hit the road looking for you! Nobody's heard from him either, Shawn! Nobody knew…" Gus swiped the tears out of his eyes angrily, unable to continue.

Shawn's eyes were huge. "I figured…"

"Yeah, you figured wrong, Shawn," Gus interrupted. "You know… the first few months, we all figured you'd been kidnapped. Do you know how guilty I felt? That I just let you leave like that? We all thought you'd tried walking home, and either gotten hit and killed or somebody had just… grabbed you and drove off."

Shawn looked at him in disbelief. "Why in God's good name would you think I'd been kidnapped?"

"Because you just vanished, Shawn! Off the face of the earth! Nobody thought you were selfish enough to just disappear like that! Without a word to anybody! So yeah, our natural assumption was that somebody kidnapped you!"

"I was seventeen, Gus! You knew how it was living with my dad; him, I could understand thinking I'd been kidnapped. But you? You should have known –"

"Should have known? Should have known that my best friend ran away without a word? And now, what, after seven years, you just decide to bounce back into town? Why now? Huh?"

The two were silent for a moment, but Gus continued giving his former best friend the steely eyed glare. Finally, Shawn sighed, and reached into his pocket, and pulled out a small pill bottle, and set it down on the table.

"You're a pharmaceutical rep, right? So you know what that is," Shawn said, avoiding meeting Gus's questioning look, as the dark-skinned man grabbed the bottle.

"Rythmol? That's a form of propafenone, right? Shawn, where did you get this?" Gus asked quizzically.

"It's mine," Shawn said quietly, staring down at his plate, still refusing to meet Gus's eyes.

"But this is for people with…"

"Tachycardia."

Gus froze. "Shawn, are you serious? This isn't some sort of joke, is it?"

Shawn laughed bitterly. "I wish. Nope, dead serious, buddy." He pulled his shirt up, revealing a long, thick scar down the center of his chest. "Even got myself a pacemaker."

"A…"

"Yeah, Gus. Had a heart attack three months ago. The doctor I was seeing in Pittsburgh was trying to get it under control when I collapsed. Massive heart attack. Nearly died, blah blah blah, and all that. Couldn't get it under control, had surgery, etcetera, etcetera… and here I am."

Gus was silent as he absorbed it all. Tachycardia. Fancy medical term meaning a person's heart beat too fast. Fancy medical term that hid the severity of the genetic disorder. If a person's heart beat too fast, it restricted blood flow to the brain, and other organs, usually leading to organ failure, strokes, heart attacks… Death wasn't exactly an uncommon occurrence.

"Are uh… Is it um… Are you…" Gus couldn't force the words out of his mouth. But –just like old times –Shawn knew what he meant.

Shawn smiled. "Yes, I'm okay, yes it's under control, and no, I'm not going to die," He said carelessly, grabbing the pill bottle out of Gus's hands, and sticking it back in his pocket. "But look, I've uh… got some things to take care of… I'm thinking about sticking around for a while… Maybe get an apartment, find a job. So uh… I'll see you around, alright?"

Gus nodded wordlessly, a large lump in his throat, as Shawn stood, and walked over to his bike, shooting Gus a wave before driving off.

Gus continued to sit at the table, for how long, he wasn't exactly sure.

He knew it was lies. Something had spooked Shawn enough to come running back to Santa Barbara after seven years. It wasn't just for a 'visit'. A near death experience might explain it… But combined with Shawn's carefree, cavalier attitude about the whole thing, and Gus started to wonder.

Was Shawn really okay? Or was this a final farewell?