*SPOILERS in this fanfic for those of you who haven't read the books!*
I love Hunger Games & Peeta/Katniss so much. And the ending of Mockingjay didn't seem enough for me, I wanted more detail of their journey together. I just think it's a shame Suzanne Collins didn't include it in the book as I thought it had the potential to be so (bitter)sweet. So here is my take on it, trying to stay as true as possible! Hope you like it. Please review, it's so helpful. Even just to drop a line or two, I don't mind.
I also don't know how long this will end up being. Nothing mega, but enough to feel satisfied with it :)
"Katniss, calm down it's fine." Peeta reassured me, as he sat on the edge of the bathtub. I hovered by the sink with one hand over my mouth, pacing a little on the spot.
"I hate waiting." I complained, feeling my stomach churning at the anticipation.
"I know, I know. Look sit down, it's all going to be okay, whatever happens."
Peeta's voice was so soothing that I couldn't help but follow his directions. Placing myself gently onto the closed lid of the toilet, I held my forehead in my hands, my elbows propped up on my knees.
Breathe, just breathe. I told myself.
Peeta was right, whatever the outcome was, it was fine. This is what he had wanted for so long...and recently what I had learned to want too. Now that the moment was here I couldn't think ahead into the future. The only thing that clung desperately to mind, all led down to right here right now. I had felt different this morning as I looked into the mirror, suddenly more grown up. We'd all been forced to mature sooner. The girl with the braid, shooting game in the forest with Gale was long gone.
Gale.
Not now. Now was not the time to wonder about him, about his life, where he is, or who he was with. It was nothing to do with me anymore. All those times we shared together, were just blurred moments of a past life. I pushed him far into the back of my mind. Into that small Pandora's box that locked away so many of my forbidden memories.
"How long?" I asked, my voice cracking a little at the end due to nerves. Peeta looked so calm and collected, perched next to me. How could he be when he had been the one who desired this for all his life, and I felt like I had just simply stepped into it? Maybe he was just as scared as I was, but covered it well. He'd always managed to do that.
"Give it another thirty seconds, just to make sure." He replied, his cool blue eyes locked onto mine, trying to help make it easier. I tried to turn off the countdown in my head, knowing he was keeping track, against my erratic thoughts. I wasn't entirely sure how I would feel about either possible solution to this situation, I guess I would know when I found out.
I stared down at my fingers, picking the hardened skin around them. Unable to face Peeta.
"Ten more."
My heart sped up, adrenaline coursed around me. These were the reactions I'd had in the games. Why was my body producing the same ones to keep me alive, here? It felt out of place, wrong. My eyes shot up to Peeta's as I realised it was time. He nodded to confirm.
"Okay." I said as I took a huge gulp of air in, suddenly afraid I wouldn't be able to breathe properly after seeing the tiny mark, or lack of, on the small screen. I reached out for the stick propped up against the tap, not wanting to look at it properly until it was in my fingers.
Just before I reached it, Peeta stood up quickly, and took my other hand in his. I turned to face him.
"Whatever happens, I love you." He murmured, but the smile of premature excitement already played at his lips. I knew he'd imagined this scenario a thousand times over in his head. God, if I could turn back the clock ten years ago and imagine this scenario for myself I wouldn't have believed my eyes that I was the girl standing next to him in it.
"Ready?" I asked, now unsure if it was him I should be consoling if it didn't work out the way we hoped.
"Yeah." He breathed, still clutching my hand tightly, our fingers locked together.
My hand trembled as I reached out for it. Shakily, I pulled it up close to my eyes, not wanting to misread it.
"What does it say?" He asked, almost impatient with enthusiasm.
My heart faltered, or ceased completely, I wasn't sure which. It felt like a lifetime before I remembered to breathe again. Blood rushed to my head and my legs felt like jelly.
"It says...that I'm pregnant." I hoarsely whispered.
Had I read it wrong? No, I hadn't. It was right. I reached my hand up to my face in shock but was surprised to find it wet. I was crying. I hadn't even acknowledged that my eyes had welled up. I turned to face Peeta, his ocean blue eyes glistening under his own tears.
It was a moment before anyone spoke.
"We...we're...having a baby?" He stuttered, his awaiting smile breaking free onto his face.
I nodded my head, feeling myself smile widely, mirroring him. "We're having a baby." I confirmed.
"Are you sure?" Peeta asked.
"I'm sure!"
Peeta's arms enclosed around my waist and he span me around our spacious bathroom. I locked my hands around his neck and cried into his shoulder. I guess my reaction was always going to be this. Somewhere deep down when I'd married Peeta I suspected this day would come, but felt disconnected from it. Now that it was here I couldn't believe it...I was going to be a mother. Our baby was growing inside of me right at this moment.
Our baby. A bit of Peeta, a bit of me.
Peeta finally pulled away from me, crying heavily himself as he wiped his face with the back of his hand. I could tell he wasn't expecting me to have this reaction. When he suggested that I take a test since I was late, I came across as indifferent, I felt indifferent, not minding one way or the other, not yet. Now my heart beat steady and strong, taking on two lives instead of one.
I laughed, loving this moment more than anything in the world, but swayed slightly on the spot from all the twirling. Reaching out for the sink to regain my balance, I felt Peeta's hand clasp my arm, steadying me.
"Woah, careful!" He warned me playfully and I could hear the sheer happiness in his voice. He gently led me into the bedroom and pulled me in for a kiss. I could feel us both smiling as our lips met each other passionately. I pulled my fingers through his soft hair, wanting to hold onto him forever, to remember these feelings and savour them as much as I could.
I fell onto the bed with Peeta falling alongside me. We lay side by side, our limbs interlinked with each others. Peeta dotted a trail of light kisses down my neck before sitting up. He placed a hand gingerly, either side of my stomach, and littered it with more kisses, right over the spot where our baby was.
"I love you so much already, and you're probably not even the size of my fingernail yet." He said, cooing to my belly. I laughed as I took in how bizarre yet wonderful this situation was.
"And I love your mommy, very much too." Peeta said softly, holding his hand out to help me sit up with him.
I clutched my hand instinctively to where he just kissed. I suddenly felt a sense of belonging in this strange world. My feelings of unfamiliarity with my surroundings dissipated, and I'm here, living in this moment. All those long hard, terrible months and years of agony both of us had been through completely evaporated. My mind was wiped clean, and I felt like my life should start right now, this minute, fresh. If I could bottle this feeling and pass it on, it would be the perfect remedy for anything. I couldn't even take in what was happening I was so happy. I went over the facts in my head, trying to make sure my feet were firmly planted on the ground, and that I hadn't died and gone to heaven.
My name is Katniss Everdeen.
I survived two hunger games.
I was the Mockingjay in the rebellion.
I killed President Coin.
I overthrew the Capitol.
I married Peeta.
I'm pregnant with his child.
We're going to have a beautiful baby.