First, I want to thank everyone for the response to my last story. If I haven't gotten back to you personally, its because I'm sneaking in FF here and there when I'm really supposed to be writing three major papers for school. But I can't seem to focus unless I write down these thoughts.

Now it's happened again. I loved the kiss scene in 3x19, but what I can't stop thinking about is what needs to happen next. So this is more about the aftermath of the kiss and Damon/Elena working out their problems. It's meant to be a multi-chapter work, provided I can get enough time in with school and all that.

I would love to hear your thoughts!

XOXO

The silence in the car was deafening, permeating the atmosphere, pounding in his ears. He glanced over at Elena from time to time, taking in her sad, pensive expression but not know what he could do about it, what he should do about it… what he wanted to do about it. He had meant what he said to her. She needed to figure this out and he wasn't going to keep playing her game. He just couldn't.

But he couldn't stand the silence any longer either. Making a snap decision, he whipped the car off the highway, taking a random exit and heading toward a dimly lit gas station. He felt Elena's eyes on him, so he glanced over at her.

"Bathroom break." He said shortly. "And a snack. When's the last time you ate?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I'm not that hungry."

He pulled into a parking spot in front of the grungy store and shoved the car into park. "Eat anyway."

XOXO

Elena sighed, looking at her reflection in the mirror as she washed her hands. She looked tired… but not as tired as she felt. She was drained, physically and emotionally.

She splashed water on her face and patted her skin dry. Drawing her long hair over her shoulders, she combed her fingers through it, her mind drifting back to the moment when Damon's hands had created those tangles. Her heart fluttered at the memory and she rolled her eyes.

"Really?" She muttered to her reflection, "That reaction to him and you're not sure you have feelings for him?"

He reflection didn't seem to have any clarifying thoughts, so Elena turned away, tying her hair back as she walked out of the bathroom. She nearly ran into Jeremy as he stood in the hallway, waiting for her to reappear.

"Still alive." She attempted a joke and a half-smile.

He didn't smile back. "Elena… I know you and Damon had a fight. If he said something that's made you this upset…"

She shook her head. "It's not Damon's fault, Jer. Honestly, you don't need to worry about it. Damon and I are... figuring some stuff out."

"Are you sure he's really what you want? I mean, this is Damon we're talking about…" Jeremy glanced over his shoulder and Elena followed his gaze to see Damon wandering aimlessly through the food isles. The distance between them didn't fool her. If he was listening, he could hear every word she and Jeremy said.

She laid her hand on her brother's arm, squeezing lightly. "I like having you back around." She smiled up at him. "I know you want to protect me, and I love you for it. But you don't have to worry about me, okay? There's no one, not even you, who wants me safe and happy more than Damon. I can promise you that."

Jeremy slung his arm around her shoulder. "You know, I think I believe you. Tell you what, when we get back in the car, I'll put my headphones in and go to sleep. That way you two can talk."

Elena gave her brother a side hug, smiling sadly. "I appreciate it, Jer, but I'm pretty sure he doesn't want to talk to me right now."

"He loves you." Jeremy gave her one last squeeze and moved toward the door. "Just… give it a shot. I'll be in the car."

Elena ran her hand over her hair and darted a glance at Damon. He had his back to her, still browsing through all the food he didn't need. She bit her lip, not sure if she should approach him. But… she was suddenly hungry after all, and the chips he was staring aimlessly at did look good.

She moved toward him, watching his face as she approached. Even when she reached across him to grab a bag of pretzels, he didn't look at her. Determined to make him at least acknowledge her, she cleared her throat. "I'm going to get a drink, too, I think. Want anything?"

"Yeah, grab me a bottle of O-negative." He glanced at her, his defensive smirk firmly in place. "Though, you know…its cheaper to get it fresh. Cashier looks juicy. Think she'd mind… sharing?"

Elena pressed her lips together, knowing he was trying to make her react, push her away further. She wasn't going to let him. "Never hurts to ask… maybe she likes to live on the edge."

She walked toward the drinks, feeling his eyes boring into her, trying to figure her out. She took a deep breath and wished him luck. She sure couldn't manage so maybe he could.

XOXO

Damon pulled out his wallet as Elena plunked her purchases down on the counter. He tried not to think about how cute it was that she'd spent minutes pouring over the gum selection, choosing just the right flavors, trying to remember which kind was Jeremy's favorite. More importantly, he tried not to imagine the hints of the berry melon flavor on her lips, her tongue.

She glanced over at him. "I'll pay, Damon. It's all my stuff anyway."

He ignored her, handing the cashier his card. The stringy-haired woman grinned at him, showing him her tobacco stained teeth. He managed a tight smile in return.

"No, here…" Elena held out a twenty dollar bill. "Use this instead." She pushed the money at the cashier, setting Damon's teeth on edge.

"Cut it out, Elena." Damon swept up the cash and shoved it back at the stubborn brunette. "Not everything has to be hard."

"I'm not making it hard," Elena insisted, "I just don't want you to have to pay for our stuff. How is that hard?"

"Sweetie, just let the man pay." The cashier leaned toward Elena conspiratorially. "He's cute and willing to dish out the dough. You need to keep a tight hold on this one. Don't let him get away."

Damon didn't give Elena a chance to respond." We're not together." He spoke shortly, drawing the cashier's attention. When her eyes were on his, he let his pupils dilate, pinning her gaze to his. "Swipe the credit card in your hand now. And no more talking."

The cashier blinked and complied, a stony silence hovering over the three of them. He could feel Elena's eyes on him as the cashier bagged their items and handed the bag to Elena. As soon as he had his card back in his hand, he turned and headed for the door, wanting the fresh air, and a little distance from Elena.

No sooner had he stepped back into the parking lot than Elena was right behind him, calling his name.

"Damon…" Her voice sounded so lost that it cut him to his heart and he couldn't help but stop to let her catch up.

She moved in front of him, looking up at him with big brown eyes. "I hate this." She dove right in. "I hate when we're like this. I'm sorry. You have to know that no matter how much I've messed this up, I never meant to hurt you…"

"What did you mean to do then?"

"I don't know. I just… wanted to figure this out. Figure us out. This trip seemed like a good way to do that, to spend time with you away from… everything else. Why is that so wrong?"

"Because you don't get it, Elena." He shook his head, beyond exasperated with her. "The fact that you would even ask me that just proves how much you don't get it."

"Don't get what?"

He rolled his eyes, pressing his hand to his forehead, running his fingers through his hair. "That it's time for you to stop testing me." He spoke louder than he meant to, but he couldn't stop himself now. "How long, Elena? How long before I'm good enough? Do you remember what I told you before? I have never wanted to live up to anyone's expectations. But you were the exception to that. You were different. I've tried so hard to be who you want me to be, and it's never good enough."

"Damon…" She moved toward him but he held her off.

"There shouldn't be anything else to figure out, Elena. You shouldn't need a road trip to put the pieces together. This is it… right here. I have spent the past months showing you every step of the way that I could be the kind of person who deserved you. If I'm not enough right now, I never will be. If you're still not sure, then I don't know what else I can do. How are you still testing me after everything we've been through together?"

He shook his head, moving around her, glancing back over his shoulder. "You don't get it. Or maybe you just don't want to get it."

"Damon, please…"

"Get in the car, Elena."

XOXO

Elena couldn't stop the course of the tears tracking paths down her cheeks as she leaned her forehead against the cool car window. Her tears were silent, but she knew Damon could sense them. He kept shifting, as though he was constantly moving to reach for her but stopping himself.

She didn't blame him. His words had cut her deep, demanding answers she didn't have. He was right. He had been her rock, her everything, her friend and comfort, and protector. Everything she asked of him he gave her, every mistake she made, he forgave her. Everything she needed, he provided for her.

And all he wanted in return was a glimmer of hope that she could love him too. Why couldn't she give him that?"

"Elena," His voice was strained, tight. "Stop crying."

"Leave me alone, Damon." She sighed and swiped at her tears. "Normally after we fight I get to storm home and cry. This time we're trapped in the car, and there's nothing I can do about that."

"Here." He shoved her drink at her. "Distract yourself. Crying isn't helping anything."

She took the drink from him and took a swig, mainly just to pacify him. "Great. All better. Diet coke solves everything."

"Yeah, well, I didn't have any vodka handy. My bad."

She looked over at him and he glanced her direction, his eyes carefully guarded. She sighed and leaned her head back against the seat. "Damon?"

"What?"

"You're not wrong."

"About what?"

She watched his face closely. "That you've more than proven what kind of man you are. You are a good man, and I do know that."

His hands tightened on the wheel and she saw him glance in the rearview mirror at Jeremy, making sure he was still plugged in and sleeping away. "Just not good enough, huh?"

"You know that's not true. It's not about how good you are, Damon. There are so many other things and I just don't know how to make it all make sense in my head. I don't know which option is the right one. I just don't and I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I need time to figure it out, but I do."

Damon flexed his fingers on the steering wheel and stared out across the dark highway. "Yeah, I'm sorry, too."

XOXO

"You awake?" Damon's voice broke the silence that had reigned in the car for the last hour and brought Elena out of her reverie.

She shifted to face him. "Yes. Are you getting tired?"

He shook his head. "Thirsty. Help me out, will you?"

Her eyes widened and she frowned, glancing down at her wrist. It wasn't that she didn't trust him, but giving him her blood seemed so intimate given everything that had happened on this trip already.

He chuckled, low and deep. "The cooler, Elena. You know, the one in the back with the bottles of blood? Grab me one."

A deep flush stained her cheeks. "Oh. Yeah, sure."

She ignored the fact that he was still smirking at her as she unbuckled and shifted in her seat, searching her hand in the dark for the little cooler he'd packed. She had to reach over Jeremy's sprawled legs to reach it and found herself balanced precariously, one knee resting on the console between her and Damon, one elbow supported by the driver's seat shoulder rest.

Finally securing her prize, she eased back, slipping and bumping into his shoulder just enough to make him swerve.

"Geez, be careful." He grabbed her arm, helping her settle back in her seat without further incident. "Thanks." He opened the bottle she'd tossed him and took a long draught.

Elena watched him, trying to get up the courage to ask him about the thought that had been chasing itself around in her head for the last hour.

"Damon?"

He grunted in response, not taking his eyes off the road.

"Why did you get in bed with me?"

He spared her a glance. "What?"

"In the motel room. Why did you come over and lay down with me?"

He took a minute before he answered. "You looked like you wanted to talk."

"Talk?"

"Yep." He spoke curtly. "Couldn't talk over Jeremy, so I came over."

"Oh." She looked back out the window, sighing.

"Why were you watching me drink along in the dark?" He countered, taking her by surprise.

"Why?" She turned and looked at him. "I don't know… I guess… I don't know, you woke me up and I was just waiting for quiet again."

"Of course." Damon drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. "So you were willing me into silence with big doe-eye, come hither looks. Makes perfect sense."

She raised her eyebrows. "So you did come over because you thought I wanted… you know…"

"No, Elena." His voice sounded tired. "I came over because if given the choice between being near you and not being near you, I'm stupid enough to always want the first option. And because you looked like you wanted me near you, for once. It's as simple as that."

She bit her lip, nervous about pressing him further. "Then why did you hold my hand?"

He looked at her in disbelief. "Because I wanted to hold your hand. It's not rocket science. Your hand touched mine and I didn't hate it, so I held your hand." He stared at her for a minute, his instincts alone keeping the car in the right lane. "You don't get to re-write this, Elena."

"I'm not!" She protested, even though she knew that wasn't entirely true.

"You're trying to. You'd feel a lot more comfortable if you could believe that I got in your bed and tried to seduce you, right? That's something you can deal with. That's big, bad Damon at work. Well, I hate to break it to you, but I didn't lay down fully clothed on your bed and hold your hand in the hopes that you would lure me out of the room and jump me in the hallway. That's not the way it happened and you know it."

"I didn't say it was." Elena crossed her arms, tucking herself as close against the car door as she could, embarrassed and frustrated that he could read her so well. Better than she could read herself.

"Good." He shifted in his seat. "But if we're going to talk about this, how about I get to ask you a question or two. What were you thinking when you were watching me?"

"I don't know." Elena rested her forehead against the window. "I wasn't thinking about anything."

"Yes you were." He insisted. "I saw the look on your face. You were thinking about something I bet I'd be very interested in."

She sighed and resigned herself to honesty. She owed him that much. "I was wondering what it would be like to have you wandering around my room at night on a regular basis. Like you belonged there… like it was your room, too."

Silence hung between them for a long moment before he cleared his throat. "Hmm. And did you come to any conclusions about that?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I liked having you there. I guess… I guess I had gotten used to you invading my room all the time before we… before the ball. Maybe I missed that more than I realized."

She met his gaze, her heart fluttering just a bit when he gave her a small smile. "That's a pretty good answer."

"Is it?"

"Mmhmm." He looked back out at the road. "It's a start, anyway."

"Are you still angry?"

"Yes," He tilted his head, shifting in his seat, "But not as much. Are you still confused?"

"Yes," She spoke quietly, watching him intently. "But not as much."

He nodded. "Fair enough. We've got hours left on the road, Elena. Get some sleep. I'll wake you up if I need to."

She had to admit, she was tired. "Damon?"

"Hmm?"

"I do miss you, you know."

He sighed and looked over at her. "I miss you, too."

She smiled and reached out a tentative hand, laying it on his arm, feeling the comfort of his presence. She barely managed to murmur, "Goodnight," before her eyes drifted closed and she fell into a dreamless sleep.

XOXO

So... do you want more? I appreciate any feedback I can get so please take a minute to review! It means a lot! Thanks guys!