dDisclaimer: I am in no way affiliated with the BBC, so this is not official Doctor Who.

Note: This is set during series 5, between Victory of the Daleks and The Time of Angels.

"And over here," said the tour-guide, "if you look, there's a nice Baalche' tree. You can tell by the 15 leaflets on the composite leaves. The Mayans were known to ferment the bark of this tree, and mix it with honey to create a very delicious beverage, even since before the Spanish arrived. Also, the modern Maya use it in ceremonies honoring their gods, unlike the blood-sacrifices of their predecessors…"

Unknown to the tour guide, two of the teenage boys in the back were quite bored with the trip: Their parents had dragged them away from the comfort of their regular life to the stuffy Yucatan jungle, despite all objections. Objections which, to them, were now justified.

"Ugh!" one of them, with black hair, exclaimed to the other, "What made our folks think coming here was a good idea? My WoW buddies are probably getting their butts kicked without me!"

"Yeah! I missed my friends' 99 attack party on RuneScape!" answered his blonde friend.

"This 'nature' stuff is so bloody boring!.. You got any videos on your Ipad?"

"…Actually, yes!" And with that, the blonde boy pulled the distinctly technological-looking white plate out of his backpack, plugged in some headphones, and offered one of them to his friend as he continued: "When we last had Wi-Fi, I downloaded the news from last week…"

"You mean the one with the sexy substitute anchor?" asked the black-haired teenager, to which his friend nodded.

"Awww yeah!" Both of them high-fived, and the video began playing.

On the small screen, the female (and scantily clad, from the boys' perspective) news anchor appeared, and she began speaking: "As I'm sure most of us are aware, Christmas season is fast approaching…and with it, an event that has been talked about for the last four years at least: December 21, 2012, a.k.a. the end of the Mayan Long-count calendar."

"Famously, the theory goes that this is the 'end of days,' and that the world will end on this day. Well, understandably, that has caused a panic this December. Tourists are flooding the Mexican provinces, still ravaged by increasing drug violence , and fallout shelters are being constructed all across the world. However, we're here to tell you that nothing – absolutely nothing – will occur on the Twenty-first."

"Scientists, hoping to appease the skeptics, have compiled a comprehensive list of all possible natural disasters, and examined the probability of one occurring on the 21st thoroughly. According to the geological survey, there are no predicted earthquakes or volcanic eruptions within this month. Our very own crack team of meteorologists has told us that no severe weather patterns appear to be forming. And what's more, astronomers across the world have proof that no celestial bodies or solar flares will strike our planet anytime soon."

Suddenly, one of the distracted teenagers missed his footing, and grabbed his friend's hand in desperation; an act that instead sent both tumbling down the steep hillside, far away from the path…

…until they finally hit a large, upwardly-jutting boulder, causing them to suddenly receive concussions! The two writhed on the ground in agony, even after the rest of the tour party caught up with them.

Luckily, two of the tourists were able to grab the two people off the ground, and haul them back up to the trail, while the guide called for a helicopter to come pick them up...

…when suddenly, one of them noticed something odd about the rock they had crashed into: "Guys, look at this! On the side of the rock…it's a calendar stone!"

A few more people looked where their fellow was pointing, and sure enough, they saw the circular patterns of a Mayan Long-count calendar stone. All the symbols that allowed the knowledgeable ancient Mayans to tell what day it was, and allow the more spiritual ones to predict the ways that fate might transpire that day, were carved into the flattened side of the boulder.

"Wow…" the tour guide said upon seeing it; "I really wish I could talk about all the ways the calendar worked…but I can't even figure out what one's doing out here!" And, her curiosity piqued, she reached out and touched the carved face in the center.

Instantly, the stone face sank inwards, with the sound of stone grating against stone. Then, accompanied by many similar sounds, all the bands around the face began to rotate like the tumblers on a massive lock.

Frightened by the sudden happening, the tourists all scrambled back up the hill, desperate to get away from the grinding, rotating stone face….

…on which, the arrows lined up with the decorative snakes on the bottom, accompanied with a sharp CLICK! Then, the inner portion of the calendar fell outwards, landing face-first on the ground, and revealing a black cavern behind it.

….

Meanwhile, the boys' Ipad, dropped in their tumble down the hill, was still playing its news video:

"So, everybody can be relaxed this month, because I maintain that Nothing will happen this December Twenty-first, Two thousand-"

The video suddenly stopped, as a clawed reptilian foot smashed the white portable computer.

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Matt Smith

Karen Gillan

DOCTOR WHO

The Mayan Calendar

By Megamafan16

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Within the confines of the TARDIS, the Doctor ran all across the raised glass floor surrounding the console, manipulating controls left and right. The central column of the machine responded by bobbing up and down, and producing an impressive grating sound that its driver had become all too used to…

…All while Amy Pond watched on in confusion: "What, you're saying I've met the Daleks before?"

"Everyone did! Back in 2008, the Daleks quite literally stole the Earth, and trapped it in the Medusa Cascade with 27 other planets. The creator of the Daleks, Davros, wanted to use the planets gravity to enable the detonation of a Reality Bomb, which would have erased all matter from existence! I stopped it, and put the Earth back in its proper place… but the Daleks destroyed a large amount of stuff on Earth, it was a major catastrophe! Nobody should forget something like a worldwide 9/11! So that's where we're going: to see why you didn't remember the thing everybody remembered!" And with that, the Doctor set the time-space throttle at the zero position…

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The TARDIS materialized in a back alley, to the shock of a nearby Hispanic person, who promptly fled. He was quite out of sight when the Doctor opened the doors, and he and Amy stepped outside.

"Okay, so, where are we, exactly?"

"Well, Amelia Pond," the Doctor said as he skipped out of the alley, "let's find out!"

And that they did: As soon as they exited the alley, they found somebody sitting by a store and reading a newspaper. The Doctor crouched down, to look at the front page…which was promptly jerked away by the offended reader! "If you want to read the news so badly," the man said in a Latino accent, "find your own copy and leave me alone!"

"Sorry, I just wanted to figure out what place and day this was."

The Doctor's statement confused the man, making his jaw drop…long enough for the Time Lord to snatch the newspaper from him, and look at the front page. He read aloud: "Yucatan times, Merida... Huh, I'm in Mexico…December 20th…2012."

He promptly returned the newspaper, as he slapped himself in the face; "Off again! Well, at least it wasn't like that incident with Sutekh, where I was driven 70 years off course!" He then grabbed Amy, and told her they were going to try again…

…when Amy pulled back, and said: "Wait…this is December 20th, 2012? The day before the End of the World?"

The Doctor looked back at her, inquisitively; "You don't actually believe that, did you? There was a 2013, and a 2014, and all the years after that!"

"Well, what about the solar flares that sent that ship, and the star whale-"

"Those happened millennia later. Listen, Amy, the whole 'Mayans predicted the end of the world' thing was invented by people obsessed with the apocalypse, and only believed by those with no sense of the laws of probability – I'm living proof that nothing. happens. tomorrow."

CRASH!

The sound of an automobile smashing into a nearby hardware store caught everybody's attention, and most of the nearby civilians jumped back in shock. Then, they rushed towards it to see if anyone was hurt...

...when the doors suddenly thrust themselves open, and a bald man with a thick mustache and a oddly-shaped knife jumped out! Snarling at the people on the streets, he brandished his knife, and then leaped through the store's smashed window.

Everyone fled to a safe distance...except for the Doctor, who despite Amy's protests, stood just outside the store and watched through what remained of the window.

What he saw was the psychotic robber, with a bag in his hand and his knife in the other, he was taking what he wanted off the shelves on the walls, then...notching the shelves with his knife! ("To make sure he doesn't forget where he's been..." the Doctor thought to himself.) At one point, the store owner tried to make the man stop, but a quick flash of the knife quickly silenced any protests.

Then, he grabbed his full bag, and ran back outside so he could get into his car, shooting a glare at the Doctor as he did. "Stay out of my way, human," the man snarled, at which point he re-entered the auto, and fled the scene.

As soon as the automobile was nowhere in sight, Amy Pond rushed over to the Doctor's side. She asked if he was okay, but he shushed her up, obviously deep in thought. The rest of the crowds began to disperse slowly...

...and the dispersion accelerated when the sirens started sounding, as everyone who didn't want to be involved with police business made their desires known to the world.

The Doctor and Amy, however, didn't. And as soon as the police arrived, the two were told to put their hands in the air.

The Doctor, confused at the situation, put his hand to his chin...and then said: "Um... Fiesta?"

Needless to say, the cops weren't too thrilled with his terrible dancing.

…...

…...

At the police headquarters, the two time travelers sat in front of their interrogator with completely confused expressions; "For the last time, we had nothing to do with it!" Amy stated exasperatedly.

"You might not have had anything to do with the past crimes, but you might have in the future." said the policeman across the table. "All of these robberies, committed in the exact same style every time, all had different people committing the crime. It's all the same kind of crime: they crash their cars, always a shiny green jeep, and enter with that odd knife. However, it's multiple people who've been seen doing it. This new gang will be stopped...and until it is, we have to suspect anyone of being in it."

"Ugh!" Amy sighed, before slumping over her end of the table. The Doctor, however, didn't look all too concerned. In fact, he didn't seem to be there at all, more content to just stare off into space!

"Um, mister?" asked the policeman, "You've been silent all this time, what're you thinking about?"

Finally, the Doctor spoke: "Have any of the reports said anything else about the criminals?"

"Er...no, not really!"

"Because what intrigued me most about this happenstance...was the culprit's reptilian eyes."

The policeman looked at him quizzically...and the Doctor explained: "He blinked as he passed me... I saw the secondary eyelid, or 'nictitating membrane'. Whatever that man was, he wasn't human. And to add to that, his knife's from a civilization that died out 5000 years ago, on a distant planet. Trust me, I went there once."

"Wait, so..." Amy pulled her head up, intrigued; "there might be something to that 'something will happen in 2012' thing?"

"Yes, Amy. I guess there is." The Doctor said, to the total shock of the policeman.

How will the Doctor avert the apocalypse? (Because we all know he will) Read on (in around a week or so) to find out! And don't forget to leave reviews!

This is a logical extrapolation of a little joke I have as a Whovian: Whenever somebody incorrectly predicts the apocalypse, I wave at the sky and say: 'Thanks, Doc!', because obviously the Doctor saved the day once again...or else the apocalypse would have happened.