(A/n: Lol. Like the cliffhanger on the last chapter?)

Disclaimer: It all belongs to Meyer!

"Well, Ms. Swan, I tested you for everything I could think of and rushed your tests through an already backed up lab. One of those tests was for pregnancy and it came back positive."

The tension in the room was palpable. "Oh my God." Slipped from my lips before I started to cry. "He...sick...oh my God." Were the only words I could get out before Emmett scooped me off the medical bed and put his arms around me.

"There was a pregnancy test in the rape kit, but it came back negative. I can't believe I didn't do a follow up." Carlisle's voice sounded heart broken. "I'm so sorry, Bella."

"It's not your fault. It's his." My voice was dead.

"I was just trying to let you have a normal life and didn't even consider it a possibility." Carlisle was full of regret, "I can't believe that I didn't check for this. I let the fact that you were doing better get in the way of being your doctor."

"It's okay Carlisle. It's not your fault. It is what it is and there's no way to change it. You have been an amazing parent these past few months." Emmett's voice comforted Carlisle little, but he smiled anyway and asked the doctor to do an ultrasound.

When I heard the heartbeat of the baby I let the tears out again.

"Well it looks like the baby is developing well. You have many options and this pamphlet can help explain all of them."

I skimmed it quickly and nodded at him. They turned the ultrasound machine off and eventually put me back in my wheelchair, explaining that since I had been so weak that I had to be on my feet less and eat even healthier.

Being pregnant was a shock that I hadn't been ready for. I mean, there was a little human growing inside of me. I thought about killing myself for a while, just to not have to go through it all. I didn't want this child. It hadn't been my decision to have sex and I didn't want the responsibility that the child brought with it, but I realized I could no more kill this child than I could kill Emmett. I didn't love it, but it was still a person and I knew, despite never being religious, that abortion was the wrong choice for me.

I decided that I would give it up for adoption. I didn't even really care who got the child so long as it was away from me. It didn't deserve to die, but I didn't love it or want it. I thought about how sad that was. Being in the womb of a woman who was repulsed by your very creation.

It was also circumstantial that they could prove James guilty in a court of law. The very existence of this child showed he had raped me, speaking that I wasn't consenting or even at the legal age of consent. He would go to jail if this child were tested and proven to be related to him.

Edward was supportive of my decision when I told him about my plans to give it up for adoption. He agreed that the child shouldn't be punished for the sins of his father. Edward stood as a father figure ought to while I suffered through my first week of knowing I was pregnant, rushing me to the bathroom when I became sick, and feeding me when my stomach could hold the food.

The doctors said the baby was developing as a 12 week old should. I returned the next Friday for another ultrasound and the one after that. Suddenly I was in the second trimester of pregnancy and back for my 14 week visit to the doctor. I had been even more sick lately, barely eating and tossing up what I did manage to eat. Carlisle's concern showed outwardly, pressed on by guilt of not having me tested or treated. This week the baby's heartbeat was too soft to find and I knew then that it would die before I could deliver it. My body wasn't up for the stress of a pregnancy or at least that's what we thought as 15 weeks came with no sign of growth or life from the child inside me.

I got home from the appointment feeling sicker and sicker by the minute. The pains in my sides wouldn't go away and as I sat on the couch I yelled for Emmett. My stomach pains were intense and I cried out. "Help me to the bathroom Emmett. Please help. Help!"

Emmett ran me to the bathroom and, God bless him, stayed near, not looking as I sat on the toilet. I pushed and pushed, realizing what was about to happen. I felt a release from inside me and began sobbing again, knowing what laid in the toilet.

"Carlisle come in here, now!" Emmett yelled from the bathroom and Esme and Emmett watched sadly as Carlisle gathered the child and wrapped him in a towel, making sure to cut the umbilical cord it was attached to from inside me with a scalpel he had in a sterilized package from the doctor's kit.

I don't really remember the ride to the ER, but all I can remember is the silence in the car as Emmett held my feet and Edward held my torso. I begged Edward at some point, "Just let me die. I'm half way there already."

All I remember was, "You're too perfect to be taken from this world. You love and are loved. I love you Bella." I also remember not being coherent enough to say "I love you" in return.

When I woke up in the hospital bed I saw the same jade green walls and knew that I was awake once more. I sat up and opened my eyes. This time Emmett was there, but accompanying him was my new family. Edward, Alice, Esme and Carlisle were there this time as I spoke, "Where am I?"

"Sacred Heart Hospital. You were severely dehydrated. We have you on fluids and you can come home now that you're awake."

I placed a hand on my stomach, "And the baby?"

"You had a miscarriage, Bella. Surely you remember." Emmett's voice tried to comfort me.

"Yes. I remember. All of it. Up to riding here in the car." My voice was soft. The baby was gone. I didn't have to worry about what to do with it anymore. I felt a little purposeless and sad, but I assumed it was just the hormones and such.

"You contracted a disease called Listeria. You'll be on antibiotics for a few weeks, but you will be healthy again." Carlisle smiled sadly.

My family stood by my side as I rolled out of the hospital. I went home and simply laid in bed. Edward was no less attentive to me than when I had been carrying the baby. In a few weeks I was strong enough to get out of bed and into my wheelchair again for more then bathroom breaks. After having my routine medicine that morning for the disease that killed the baby, I got into my wheelchair and Edward rolled me into the front room.

I want to get out of here. Out of the house.

I wrote in my notepad. Edward had been going to school, but I had skipped, falling behind in my studies. My teachers were understanding over e-mail and I assumed they would help me get back on my feet when I came back to school for the first time. Whenever I was ready, I could go back to school and that day was Monday, tomorrow, to be exact. I had a whole Sunday to mentally prepared. I hadn't spoken yet though. I wasn't ready to talk.

Can we go outside?

I felt the need to look at something other than the walls of the house. "Sure. Anything Bella." Edward smiled down at me sadly.

After Edward bundled me up, we strolled outside and I felt the sunlight caress my face for the first time in three weeks. I looked out across the lawn and saw trees and grass and a creek beyond the property line. I focused in on one tree and wrote Edward that I wanted to go sit under it. It was a big tree with big roots in the ground poking up and making the ground I rolled over uneven. I looked up and saw the trunk and nearly cried when I saw it had been cut away to form a perfect knot right in the middle of the trunk. This tree was just like me. It was dirty and uneven and was empty inside.

"Why this tree?" Edward's question rang in my ears for a long moment before I recognized the need to answer.

It is just like me. It is bumpy at the base, dirty, and hollow.

"It isn't hollow. There's just a small knot-hole where we cut a branch back."

A piece of me has been taken too. I hate the life I live and the situations life has presented me. I want to run and hide and cower and I have never been THAT person. That person who doesn't want to live.

"We desire you to live. We love how you are so strong despite your hardships. Not very many people go through what you've been through. We are so proud of you." Edward's voice was sincere. It sounded like he meant every word he said.

I want to start over.

"Pick an empty spot in the yard." Edward urged.

I pointed across the yard and Edward rolled me in that direction. I came to a spot far away from the tree that had struck our sad conversation and finally told Edward to stop. I pointed my finger at a random piece of ground and Edward began to walk away. Edward disappeared for a moment into the garage. Just when I was going to start being upset and roll toward the house Edward reappeared shovel in hand. "Show me again" He instructed.

I pointed once more and he got to work. He dug and dug until there was a sizable hole in the ground. After he was done digging he looked up at me, all cute and dirty and I gave him an odd look. "We're going to put a tree in that hole Belly-bean."

In his dirty jeans and all he rolled me over to his car and we headed to Marcum's Nursery. I rolled down every row and finally chose a magnolia sapling. The worker gave us instructions on how to plant it and how to care for it. On a table next to the check out clerk was a beautifully decorated assortment of watering cans. My wheelchair was too short to see all of them, but the ones on the front row looked beautiful. Edward caught me glimpsing at them and smiled. He asked the clerk how much the cans were and the clerk gave him an answer. Edward spoke to me, "Do you want a watering can? You can take care of your tree with it."

I nodded and craned my neck futilely to see them all.

"Stand up if you can't see them." Edward instructed. I frowned at him and shook my head. "Come on Belly-button. You can do it." Edward egged me on so I finally put the locks on my wheelchair and pushed my body up. I shakily stood and leaned on the table for support, making sure not to use too much weight and tip it. I swayed, but held strong as I looked for the perfect can. I chose one and handed it to Edward, sitting back in my wheelchair on my own. Edward beamed with pride and the clerk smiled as he checked us out.

We put the tree in the trunk of the Volvo and drove home, going straight back to our hole to plant it. Edward carried the tree first and then came to help me try to roll (unsuccessfully) across the damp grass. Edward put the tree in the hole and then filled the dirt in, making sure not to bury it too deep or too shallow.

Once Edward was done and thoroughly muddy he looked up at me and smiled. "There's your new start Bella. After school everyday we'll come out and water it. It'll grow into something brand new. Just like you."

Thank You.

That was all I could get on the paper before tears blurred my eyes. Edward picked me up and held me for a moment and then lowered me back down into my wheelchair to go get Esme and show her what we'd done.

Esme walked out of the house and gasped. She and Edward walked out to the sapling. "Hello Bella. Nice to see you out and about. You've been very busy today."

I smiled up and Esme smiled back, "This is beautiful. I can't wait until it's big and we can bring the blossoms in. They can permeate through a whole house."

The rest of that day was spent lazing around the front room and running fingers through Edward's shower dampened hair.