"When you were mine"

(Bob and Roma's story)

(Intro)

In the dark of the night I pray. My pleading with God will not be answered though. I know it won't. In the light of morning your side of the bed will still be empty. My fault...It's all my fault. Did I throw my youth away on a dream? Did I throw your love away for nothing? Damn, but life was simple when you were mine. Life was better with you by my side. So much time has been wasted. All of your love I took for granted. For that I'm sorry. I'm so tired of laying in bed alone waiting for day to come. I'm so scared to wonder where you are, what your doing, or who your with. But I can't stop my mind from thinking about it. Thoughts of you are all I have to keep me warm at night. But that has to change. It will change. I will make you see how much I need you. I will find you and bring you home. You will be mine again Roma.

(PART 1)

"Bob? Hello earth calling Bob...umm come in Bob."

"Huh...wait...what?"

"Man you really are zoned out today. What's wrong?"

"Wrong? Nothing...nothing's wrong. I'm fine Frank." If fine is not being able to sleep for more than two hours a night than yeah I'm just great. And if laying in bed night after night staring at the empty side of the bed is fine than everything is fucking super. Why the hell is he looking at me like that? Did I grow a second head or something?

"You know if something's on your mind I'm here for you to talk to." Lovely, now he thinks he's Dr Phil.

"Jeez Frank, since when did you turn into Oprah?" Ok, that sounded a little more rude than I wanted. It was supposed to be a joke. Don't think he took it that way if the look on his face is any indicator.

"Man, something really has turned you into an ass. What is it Bob? Come on and out with it. I can be even more annoying than you can be a jerk. So just talk already." Talk? Fine, might as well.

"I...umm...I miss Roma, ok! Happy now?"

"Well it's about damn time you realized that." What? He's giggling. The short sob is giggling.

"What? And stop giggling like a school girl."

"Of course you miss Roma. Hell, we all miss her. We've just been waiting around for you to finally realize you miss her enough to do something about. Which I'm guessing you finally have."

"You know, you could have said something before now."

"Nope, this one was all on you. You fucked up dude. And you lost the girl because of it. Question is now that you can admit that, what are you going to do about. Do you really want her back?"

"I love her Frank. I really do."

"Then go get her and bring her home."

"I was thinking about that last night. In my head I was telling her I'd do just that."

"Then go do it. Get off your ass and go get the girl."

"I can't...I don't even know where she is. She didn't go back to Slovakia. I have no idea where else to look. I lost her."

" You really think she'd head back there? Never mind, if I tell you where to go will you just go?"

"What? How do you know where she is?"

"Simple genius, Jamia told me. Roma does still talk to her via computer and through something called a phone. I know you've heard of these things. You do own one of each ."

"Funny smart ass! Where is she?"

"Well I'd rather be a smart ass than a dumb ass."

"Stop laughing...where is she? Tell me."

"She's in South Carolina."

"What the hell is she doing there?"

"She has a friend there. Give me a second to call the wife. I'll get the exact address for you."

(PART 2)

"Excuse me sir, can I get you another glass of water?"

Shit,where did she come from? One second not a single person is around and then poof a stewerdess is right beside my seat. Frank was right about my zonning out lately.

"No thank you. I'm fine."

"Alright sir, just call if you need anything.",the woman half giggles as she walks away.

Looking at my watch I notice that I have at least two more hours until the plane lands in South Carolina. Once there it'll take another hour to get to the small town Roma's in. Apparently there aren't many airports around where she is.

*2 hours later*

Maybe it would have been a better idea to take a cab instead of renting a car. This highway is packed with people going in both directions. And the map I picked up reads like bad stereo instructions. I can barely make sence of it. Thank god that lady at the gas station I stopped at was nice enogh to give me better directions. Now I'm headed the right way. In about an hour I'll see Roma I should have called her first. Frank got the phone number from Jamia and gave it to me. But the fear of her hanging up on me or worse telling me not to come stopped me from using it. What if she slams the door in my face? What the hell do I do then? I could put my foot in the door so she couldn't do that. That might be an idea. Then again if she did try to slam it shut my foot could get broken. No way am I going back to a hospital. Going after the burns from the video shoot was bad enough.

*about an hour later*

Driving down the main street of the town I can tell this place really is small. But it has a kind of freindly look to it. Everything from the police station to the pharmacy is on this one road. There in between the local church and a baseball field is the paved road I need. Turning onto the road I notice the rows of houses on either side. The only brick house on the whole street is easy to spot. There in that house is the woman I love. Sitting or sleeping in there is the love I came to get back.

I pull the rental car into the driveway and turn off the ignition. There are two other veichals in parked here. One is a red dodge neon and the other is a big blue pickup truck. According to Jamia and Frank, Roma is staying with a friend of her's named Christy and the girl's husband. My guess is that the car belongs to the wife.

My hands begin to sweat as I walk past the front garden. Roma loves flowers. I wonder if she helped plant any of these.

Standing in front of the door I knock two times with my right hand and then wait. It only takes a few seconds for someone to answer.

"Hello,can I help you?", asks a woman with shoulder length blond hair and dark green eyes, must be Roma's friend. I can see why they get along. The woman's wearing jeans and a Bon Jovi t-shirt. They must have the same taste in music.

"Hello, I''m sorry to bother you but I'm looking for Roma. Is she here?"

"Roma? Yes she's staying here but she went down to the library a little while ago. Who are you?"

"My name is Bob. I'm ...um...well,I'm in love with her."

"Bob? As in the ex Bob?"

"Yeah that would be me."

"Well Bob, I think you better come on in and wait for her to get back." Now that wasn't the response I was expecting. I thought I was in for getting yelled at.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?", I ask almost whispering.

"I think it's a great idea. You have no idea how upset Roma has been over you. Maybe if the two of you sit down and talk you both can find a way to work things out."

"But you don't even know me."

"True! But I do know what she's told me about you. And I know that you came all the way here just to tell her you love her. That says a lot about the kind of person you are. So, come on in the house to wait. She should be back soon. I just made some homemade lemonade if you want some."

(PART 3)

Waiting to find out if I've lost the best thing that ever happened to me sucks. There's no other way to describe it. The waiting just plain sucks. I've walked back and forth across this living room floor at least a hundred times. I've looked at all the pictures hanging on the walls to many times to count. The old English country side painting is kinda nice. My mom would probably love it.

"Bob?"

I hear my name and turn around to find Roma standing in the doorway. Her arms are filled with books. Unlike me she loves to read. When she left she forgot about a dozen books in the house. Her hair is hanging down past her shoulders and her eyes are focused on me. I can't tell by the look in her eyes if she's glad to see me or not. Maybe coming here wasn't such a good idea.

"Bob, what are you doing here?",she asks with the voice of an angel.

Taking in a deep breath I say the first thing that pops in my head.

"I came for you."

"What?"

"Roma,please just listen for a minute. I have some things I want to tell you."

"You couldn't have said them over a phone? I'm guessing you could have got Jania to give you the number here. It seems like you got her to give you the address."she says while taking a few steps into the room and placing the books she's holding on the coffee table. "So, what do you want to say?",she continues crossing her arms over her chest.

"I love you. I know I'm not the easiest person in the world to live with. And I know that I'm the one who fucked up everything we had. But, I wanna fix things between us."

My heart is starting to pound as I watch Roma unfold her arms and sit on the couch. She leans her head down facing the floor. "Why?", is all she says.

Looking at her I can see that she's closed her eyes. And tears can be seen forming around her lashes.

"Roma, I wasted a lot of time working when I should have been spent it with you.I just started feeling like I had to do something else. The guys all have other things besides the band. Gee has his comics, Frank has Leathermouth, Ray has his writing, and Mikey's always trying something new. I just felt like I needed something too. And in trying to find that something else I lost you. My heart has been screaming at my head to get you back since the day you left. I know it has taken a few months, but I've finally got my head to listen to my heart."

Stopping to take a breath I can feel the tears run from my eyes. If she doesn't believe me...if she doesn't wanna try again I might as well die here where I stand.

" I've realized that I already had the something else I was looking for, The thing that I felt I needed so badly was with me the whole time. It's you. You're what I've needed. I was just too blind and stupid to see it."

As the last few words I say exit from my lips Roma's head comes up and her eyes meet mine. Silent tears run down both of our faces. The pounding of my heart stops.

I walk towards the couch and kneel in front of her.

"Please Roma...please don't cry", I plead while taking hold of her hands in mine.

"I can't stop the tears."

'Then I will",I promise her as I lean forward and kiss away the tears from her face. Pulling back to look into her eyes I see them start to dry.

"Bob, I love you."

"And I love you all the way to the moon and back."

"What do we do now?"

"Get married, if you will have me."

"You want to marry me?"

"Of course I want to marry you. I need you. And I promise if you marry me I'll never leave you."

"And I'll never leave you again."

*2 months later*

"And do you Bob take Roma to be your wife?"

"I do",I say to the priest. And to the woman I love I whisper,"and I'll never leave you from this day forward."