Disclaimer: I have no other creative, witty ways to say that Harry Potter does not belong with me. I'm sure J.K. Rowling could come up with a few however...

Author's Note: Thanks for reading, reviewing, adding this story to your alerts! I love reading your reviews, so thank you for taking the time to leave them! So, here's the next chapter. I hope you all enjoy it!

Chapter 4: A Burning Phoenix

Sign Three: Multiple Personality Transfigurations

An odd phenomenon takes place when you begin to become infatuated with another person. The Amare will continue it's feverish burn through your bodily system, and by doing so it will begin to transfigure your persona. Your likes, dislikes, and otherwise rational personality will take on a new form all together. Some medical experts say that this is due to the body's reflex trained to rid itself of the disease, becoming someone else to forget about the Amare and its effects. Unfortunately, this personality transfiguration only makes the Amare more potent. Important note: stay away from alcoholic beverages, for this will only make the side effects worse. You may become uncharacteristically touchy, handsy, and overall more forth-coming.

OOO

There were a few things that the population of Hogwarts knew about their Head Girl. The first and most simple fact was that she was Muggle-born. The second was that her blood status really proved nothing, because she could easily send any one of the Hogwarts' students onto their backs with a flick of her wand—a fact that the Slytherin's would only admit most begrudgingly in the sacred corners of their private thoughts. The third was that Lily Evans would never send any one of the students crumpling to the floor because she was so good. She was the type of girl that students looked at and muttered, "Has she ever done anything bad?" Severus had often told her that there was some light inside of her that he seemed to lack; that this light created an incorruptible barrier around her soul.

She had always hated how Severus would say things like that, as if he were beyond saving.

What the students of Hogwarts didn't know, however, was that she was capable of doing bad things. The summer after fifth year, after a particularly nasty fight with Petunia, she had accidentally blasted her family's front door right off of its hinges as she had thrown it open to escape the stifling house. She had even received a warning from the ministry about the use of underage sorcery. Technically, she was kind of like a fugitive. Sixth year Christmas break, after she had seen Sev hanging out with Mulciber in the same park that the two of them had spent hours lounging around in together, she had snapped; she had strode up to the pair of them, and before either one of them had even saw her approaching, she had smacked Mulciber across the face.

She actually wasn't quite sure how she had gotten out of that one unscathed.

The truth was there were moments when Lily just couldn't stand to be herself anymore. As if her skin was a prison cell and she wanted to break free from it. Push it to its limits until it couldn't hold her wrath in any longer. There were just times when being someone else seemed like the better option, because Lily hated being sentimental or overly emotional, and if she could only escape it, then things would be better.

So, drinking herself to the bottom of a firewhiskey bottle seemed to be a good solution to the hurt that was flaring through her as she watched Felicity and James enjoy themselves at the same table that she had graced earlier.

Lily could clearly remember everything…up until the exact point when James had left the pub with Felicity on his arm; everything after that became a blurred vision as she downed the remaining liquid in Sirius's bottle. It left a burning sensation that trailed from her tongue, down her esophagus, into her stomach that made her feel as if she were a Phoenix catching fire with the hope of becoming something new. Vaguely, she recalled Sirius pushing another firewhiskey at her from across the table, and because her hand-eye coordination was a little shaky, Chadna grabbed it for her; Remus opened it. And Peter sat there mouthing off some ridiculous jokes about dragons and bartenders, and they made absolutely no sense to Lily, but she laughed anyways.

Because this motley crew was like her new best friend.

In fact, by the time Chadna pried away the second bottle from her when she still had a good quarter of it left, Lily didn't even remember why she was drinking in the first place. Lily wasn't a drinker—in fact, half-a-pint usually made her vision go fuzzy behind her eyes—but she felt so happy. Light even. Like she didn't have a care in the world, and Sirius's black hair seemed to be glowing, like really glowing, like thousands of diamonds were embedded into his scalp.

It was a glorious sight, really.

"I told you," Chadna was saying, berating Sirius as the group finally left the pub after three hours of trying to convince Lily to leave, "butterbeer cannot be used as an effective sobriety-fixer. Just look at her!" Chadna waved her hand at Lily sporadically who waved back as she stumbled over the threshold of the door and into the fresh March air. Spring was such a fantastic season, the best of them all, and Lily was in love with the way the sunset turned the sky into tints of blood-orange and pinks and midnight-blues.

Despite the cool temperature, she felt comfortably warm.

"It works for me," Sirius replied with a shrug of his broad shoulders, tossing his empty butterbeer bottle into a waste bin.

Remus chuckled, a low throaty sound that reminded Lily of approaching rainfall. "No, it doesn't, Padfoot."

"You told me last month that it was a great idea!"

"It was a great idea," Lily decided to add into the conversation, though no one so much as looked at her.

"You were drunk!" Remus rolled his eyes. "You can't reason with drunk people."

As if to prove Sirius' point, Lily shrugged out of her jacket and tossed it behind her carelessly.

Sirius bent to pick it up. "Neither can you reason with your furry little problem, but we don't feed it butterbeer to sort out the kinks," Sirius shot back with a sweep of his silky dark hair as he threw Lily's clothing over his arm.

"You still own that psychotic rabbit?" Chadna asked, her hand on Lily's shoulder protectively.

"Remus doesn't have a bunny," Lily pointed out quite reasonably, but before she could continue with the fact that the Marauders were actually referring to Remus's lycanthropy—although her current state-of-mind couldn't quite form itself around that ridiculous sounding word—Peter interrupted, pushing her to the side so that she stumbled into Sirius' side.

"Like you're one to talk," he said in that squeaky voice of his, "your cat is mental."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure Mora has chased Wormtail, here, around the castle countless of times," Sirius added with a sly smirk flickering onto his face as he took Lily by the elbow. "Now, come on, Red. Let's get you back to the castle in one piece so that James doesn't kill us for losing his fellow Head Girl."

Lily gasped as the sound of his name cut through her like a thousand Cruciatus curses, but she couldn't quite remember why...

The reassuring touch of Chadna on her other arm, however, soothed her writhing bones. "She's my best friend. Hand her over," she declared, grabbing Lily from Sirius as if she were nothing more than the pet chinchilla that Lily had always wanted as a child.

Lily felt like pointing that out. "I am a human."

Chadna just smoothed down her friend's hair, glaring at the boys around her as if it were their fault Lily was currently a tipsy mess. "Of course you are."

By the time they made it back to the castle, most of the fire had burned from Lily's system, which left her feeling oddly droopy. Everything about her seemed to be operating much slower than was normal. When they reached the Fat Lady's portrait, Lily was leaning against Chadna heavily, her head on her friend's slim shoulder as she giggled over the simple fact that she had just been drinking with James Potter's best friends. And her best friend. The whole situation seemed laced with an irony that she couldn't quite place but that she found as hilarious as a two-eyed Cyclops.

Despite her loss of energy, a jolt went through Lily that set her spine straight with a snap as her gaze zeroed in on a messy haired boy sitting by the fireplace. Everything became clear in that moment, and it was just him. And her. Jalily. The common room was such a lovely place. She pushed herself away from Chadna with rejuvenated strength; her fingertips were tingling, and her blood seemed to be singing with a new type of flame.

The Amare was back.

A thousand things to say flitted through her brain, some witty, some snarky, some just plain embarrassing, but what came out was: "Potter." She nudged Remus, who was closest to her, and missed his forearm by inches. "Hey, it's James," she exclaimed as if it were the most surprising thing in the world. "Potter," she said again, because one greeting just wasn't enough; it would never be enough. His name tickled her breath, and she suddenly wanted him to feel it to.

James turned towards the group, his lovely hazel eyes surveying the scene as they flickered from his friends, to Lily who was staring at him with her head turned towards the side, and Chadna who had her head in her hand. "Slow down, Lily," he said lightly, "You're going to give me an identity complex if you carry on like that."

Lily took a small step forward, tripped slightly on the upturned corner of the carpet, and said in a rather playful tone that made Remus' eyebrows raise, "What would you like me to call you then?"

His snarky grin made Lily's stomach flip, or maybe that was the digesting alcohol. "Well, I've been called Most Handsome Wizard Alive, on occasion."

"On what occasion?" Sirius had stepped forward, throwing Lily's jacket onto the couch James was occupying. "National I'm An Idiot day?"

"That must be everyday, then," James concluded with a clap of his hands. He eyed Lily who was standing perfectly still, her eyes on him, hands clasped in front of her; yet there was a slight swaying to her body that made her feel as if she were about to topple over at a moment's notice. "So, how was your day?" he asked the group, and Lily heard the curiosity there.

Yet something about the question made Lily feel like growling like Chadna's evil feline. Instead, she found herself smiling easily. "It was rather silly," she remarked.

"Silly?" James's lips quirked at the corners.

From behind Lily's back, Sirius was making a hand motion as if he were chugging a mug of beer and then pointing at the back of the inhibited redhead's head. James looked from Sirius to Lily—every time his gaze landed on her, she felt like jumping onto the couch right beside him so that she could feel the warmth of his skin up against hers—and she made to take another step towards him when Chadna appeared in her way.

"Maybe we should go upstairs, Lily," she suggested lightly.

"No."

Everyone turned to stare at her as if she had just shouted. And maybe she had. Her ears felt clogged. Lily looked at Chadna. Somewhere, in the back of her mind, she was looking at her friend, but all she could really see was James's stupid grin, and she wasn't quite sure why, but she knew that she couldn't leave him now. Her thoughts were jumbled, but she was being reasonable; they were friends. James was her friend. She wanted to talk to her friend. "I want to stay here," she carried on, grasping Chadna's hand. "Please. I'm okay."

Just by the fact that she had had to clarify her well-being, Chadna's eyes narrowed worriedly, but Lily had already let go of her friend's hand. Chadna sighed dramatically. "This will be on your head, Evans," she called out as Lily waltzed over to the fireplace. She fixed her steely gaze on James. "Don't let her do anything stupid."

Both James and Lily replied with, "I won't."

Their synchronicity seemed to be the final straw for Chadna who grabbed Sirius and Remus by the sleeves of their jackets, knowing Peter would follow. "Come on, you three. You can finally show me that collection of snapping gobstones that you've been mentioning incessantly."

Sirius made a victorious noise as the group walked towards the boys' staircase. "They may bite. Pete's got the scar to prove it."

As their voices grew fainter, Lily leaned up against the back of the couch. "Mind if I join you?" she asked.

His smile was infectious. "Be my guest." With a dismissive motion that showed his high-priority for academia, James swiped the books and essay he'd been working on off the couch and onto the floor.

Lily plopped herself among the cushions. It was very difficult to restrain herself from closing in the meager gap she'd left between them. She clasped her hands firmly in her lap and looked at him through her slightly glazed over eyes. "I would just like to put a disclaimer on this conversation," she began rather rationally. "Whatever may come out of my mouth in these next few minutes, just blame it on the Amare."

"Amare?" he questioned, and there was an undercurrent of amusement there that caused Lily's clasped fingers to twitch. "Are you trying to tell me that you love me?"

It was like she heard what he was saying, but the horror and humiliation didn't quite register. In fact, she just felt incredibly giddy. "Quit putting words in my mouth; they taste like strawberries."

James snorted. "What drinks did Sirius give you, Pecs?"

Lily wrinkled her nose. "Don't call me that; it's too adorable."

"Adorable?" he questioned. "Let me guess; that's the Amare talking?"

Unable to stop herself because his grin was just too addicting, Lily tapped his shoulder with her fingers like drumsticks. "You're a quick learner, Potter. Not at all as daft as I originally thought." She resettled herself deeper into the couch, snuggling up to it, and now she was close enough to feel the heat from his arm against her side. She smiled to herself. "Tell me three things about yourself, Most Arrogant Wizard Alive," she said, throwing him a sideways look.

"I believe the term was 'handsome,'" James corrected.

She rested her head on the back of the red sofa and turned to the side, so that from behind it would look like she was lying on Potter's shoulder. "I'm getting sleepy, Potter, and all I want is for you to tell me three things about yourself. Do it."

"I hate fish; absolutely despise the taste of it," he began automatically, as if he had had these three things listed out for years, "the scaly skin that sticks to the bottom of a plate grosses me out."

"You can crush beetle eyes with a mallet, but you can't eat a piece of salmon?"

"It's a problem, I know."

She laughed quietly in the back of her throat. "Number two, Potter."

James grinned, patting her knee reassuringly. Her kneecap burned. "Alright, alright," he appeased, "Though I love your name—obviously—the smell of your flower's namesake causes my nose to itch and throat to close up."

"How did you figure that out?" she asked curiously, poking his hand that was resting in the slim space between them, because his thin fingers suddenly reminded her of flower stems.

"Third year, I wanted to send you lilies, but I went into an epileptic shock the moment I picked them up in the store at Hogsmeade."

"Cliché, Potter."

"I was quite besotted."

Besotted; what a fantastic word. Lily sat up and looked at him, her hand frozen over his. "Was?" she asked. His innocent use of the past tense caused her stomach to clench like the leftover firewhiskey had grown a fist and was grabbing her intestines.

"Again, I must ask, how many drinks did Sirius give you?"

She was unexpectedly annoyed now, irritated at Felicity Cassidy of all people, because she just had a feeling that this was all her fault. "Two. And a butterbeer. Maybe two beerbutters—butterbeers. Just give me your third fact, Potter."

He snickered before continuing. "I think you're really amusing," he said lightly.

She sighed resignedly, appropriating her slouched position. "Because I'm a bit tipsy at the moment?"

He shook his head, positively grinning now. "No. Well, yes," he amended. "But I think you're always fun to be around."

His words caused her heart to pound as she looked at his face. It was unfair to all women how attractive he was. His black hair fell against the slight olive tone in his complexion in a disorganized mass of waves as if he knew darn well how handsome he actually was. The color palette reminded her of shady places in the sunshine, and she wanted to—she wasn't quite sure what she wanted to do. Crawl up underneath his shade and lay there forever?

Her toes and fingers tingled as she continued to watch him. The Amare, disguised as stale alcohol at the moment, ran rabid through her blood, causing her hand to move without her knowledge. Somewhere, in the slowly sobering part of her mind, she watched as her hand came up in front of her eyes and then attached itself underneath James's chin. Her spine seemed to vibrate at the feel of the soft, slightly scratchy, feel of his skin and the prickle leftover from his last shave. It was a manly texture.

"Lily," he said carefully, and it was as if she was someone whose actions couldn't quite be pinned down, "that's my face." His eyes twinkled slightly as he allowed her to maneuver his face.

"Glad to know your brain still works." She turned his face this way and that, observing its surface expertly. Merlin, he was so perfect; she wanted to slap him.

"I'm going to blame this on the Amare," he laughed, although there was a breathy quality to it that made Lily believe that he was suddenly nervous.

And she loved that she was making him nervous.

She placed her other hand on his cheek. It was warm like freshly baked cookies in the late afternoon. "I'm trying to look for flaws," she explained fuzzily.

"…On my face?" he inquired, watching her in a cautious manner, and his fingers seemed to be shaking slightly as they reached up to grasp her fingers. Heat erupted down her arm, and she held her breath.

He pried her hand away, but still held onto it. "Lily, I think you're endearingly…" he struggled to find the correct word, a slight smirk lighting up his features, "loose right now, and I—"

"I found one," she interrupted him, trailing her fingertips along his jawline to a point just below his earlobe. "There's a scar here." She felt the pressure on her hand that was clasped in between James' tighten as she traced the blemish with her fingernail. "Not as perfect as you seem, James."

She expected his normal wit, his intelligent retorts that left her feeling unhinged but on her toes, that made her feel exhilarated to carry on the fight, and he didn't disappoint her, even though he was flushed and breathing heavily in her face, because they were much too close. But not close enough. Never close enough. "The one sign of my earthly humanity that reveals I'm not too good to be true."

"Shut up," she snorted, shoving his head away from her softly, teasingly.

"Damn, I wish I had a camera to document this moment," James said abruptly.

"Why?" It was becoming hard for her to concentrate as she stared at their clasped hands in his lap. For some reason, she felt like this was wrong—well, Merlin, no, it felt so right, but wrong all the same. She felt all over the place, like her mind was all over the common room, hopping between couches, leaping across armchairs.

His eyes seemed to be laughing, and they brought her straight back to the couch they were both sitting in. "So tomorrow, when you're blaming me, I would have some physical proof that I, for once, was the innocent bystander."

And suddenly she remembered what felt wrong about this, why she shouldn't be touching his face or liking the sweaty feeling of his hand. Because he was not available. With sharper force than she had intended, she snatched her hand back from James' lap. "Why don't you find me attractive anymore?" she snapped at him.

The laughter in his eyes petered out as they stared at each other, sizing each other up like they always did. Lily's chest was heaving painfully as her breaths became harder to handle; she knew the effects of the firewhiskey were wearing off, because she now felt like running up the stairs and never looking back. She felt like smothering her face into a pillow and crying her eyes out.

She felt like grabbing James Potter and snogging him senseless before she would no longer have the alcohol to blame it on.

"What?" James stuttered out.

"Lily!" Chadna's voice rang out across the common room as she hurried over to her crazed friend. "Time to go, darling," she exclaimed, grabbing Lily's arm and hoisting her to her now-steadier feet.

"Wait," James declared, jumping to his feet as well and making a grab for Lily's other hand.

Chadna just glared at him. "I told you not to do anything stupid!"

"Technically, you told me not to let her do anything stupid, which was a tall order seeing as she's completely smashed."

She was drunk. Was she drunk? It was hard to tell. What she did know was that she was suddenly furious with Potter. And why were they talking about her as if she were no longer standing there? Well, maybe she shouldn't be standing there. With a quick glance at both of them, Lily spun on her heels and tore up the stairs to the girls' dormitory.

By the time Chadna appeared, Lily was already in her bed sobbing her eyes out like she was one of the girls in those romantic films that Lily always made fun of. What had the Amare had turned her into? Blasted disease. She looked up at her friend through red, puffy eyes. "You were watching us the entire time, weren't you?" she sniffled.

Chadna sat down at the edge of her bed. "Of course," she shrugged. "The number one rule of friendship."

"Never allow your best friend to get emotionally sloshed?"

"Yeah, well, I failed at the one."

Lily snorted, but her nose was running, so it ended up as a disgusting mess of tears and snot that ran down her chin. Chadna Accio-ed a tissue from the bathroom. "Actually, I was referring to the rule: never allow your friend to embarrass herself while she is emotionally plastered, so I think I managed that one all right," she said lightly as Lily mopped herself up.

"Was that before or after you let me rub my hands all over his face?"

Chadna just grinned as Lily clapped her hands over her own face as she began to recall everything that had just transpired downstairs. Lily moaned behind her veil of embarrassment.

"I hate life," Lily mumbled against her tears and hands.

"Oh, good," Chadna commented, "you're sobering up, because I did not want to be the friend who held your hair back as you puked."

A/N: Well, that's that. Let me know what you thought, give me your predictions of what will possibly happen next, or simply drop by and say hi. As for the length of this story, I'm still debating. I'll see where the wind takes me. Please, please, please review! Now, I'm gonna go eat a cookie.

-HeyLookTheSnitch