What A Tangled Web We Weave

Olivia. Elliot. How far would partners go to save each other?

DISCLAIMER: Law & Order SVU, its story lines and characters, do not belong to me but to Dick Wolfe and NBC. I only write fiction for my and your amusement. If I actually made money from it, I'd write a hell of a lot more.

A/N: Pretend Elliot did NOT leave at the end of season 12, but found himself on very thin ice with IAB. This fic is deeply mature, containing a whole lotta adult situations. If you are distressed by this sort of thing, go back to reading Charlotte's Web or some shit. Do not read this and then leave an angry or upsetting review because of it's content. You were advised.

Chapter 1- Turmoil

Benson Residence

On top of all the other crap she had put up with today, her period had started. Not that she wasn't relieved, again. It was just that she didn't need any other messes to have to deal with. Not now.

Not that she didn't want a baby. She'd love to have one. Any other time she may have been saddened by the onslaught of mother nature. But after today, the idea of ever having a family of her own was pretty close to nonexistent. The idea of a more convenient birth control crossed her mind. She'd have to make an appointment with her doctor as soon as possible. There was no way in hell she'd let herself get pregnant now.

Chiding herself for feeling so upset over things she didn't have, she thought of the family she did have. Don, El, Fin, Casey, and John had been just that to her for some time now. Their families were hers also. Though she couldn't compare just how much they and true blood relations would actually be similar, she often told herself that maybe they weren't that much different. From what she had observed, her adopted family did much the same things for her as a real family should. They all wanted nothing but the best for her.

Except for Elliot; not that he didn't want the best for her. He did. Probably more so than the rest. Being partners made their relationship, well complicated. She often thought of Elliot much more than just a partner. That wasn't a safe subject for her though. One best left in the dark recesses of her heart and mind.

That's why Olivia found herself in this mess. Maybe she had crossed some line of caring too much. She knew of those imaginary lines that existed, especially between herself and her partner. They were there for a reason. A damn good reason. Just when she had slipped over one, she had no idea. That was the 'complicated' part, she figured.

She was thinking too much again. But what else did she have to do? At 1:16 in the morning she knew of little else. Especially sleep. Being in Special Victims made sure of that.

Tonight it wasn't her job that kept her awake though. Well, not directly 'her' job, but of her partners. Her partner with a family. Five children. All depending on him. His family that she thought of as her own just a few moments ago. What would they do if he lost his job, his pension? The thought made her physically sick.

If up to her, he would never lose it. And right now, it was up to her. So why was she sitting here contemplating on what to do? There was no decision to be made.

She pulled herself up and walked over to her window, slightly moving the heavy drapes over just enough to see the still busy street below and the apartment complex across the way. Two taxis had a fender-bender at the light. Thugs congregated at the opposite corner, no doubt making their nightly deals. Two lovebirds were kissing in front of her building. Someone was upset at the ATM down the street. A couple on the fourth floor of the apartments across the street were fighting. Did they know, or even care the kid in the next room was awake and listening.? From what she could tell, a couple were making love in the apartment next to that one, right there on their sofa with the light on and the curtain open. One of the street lights flickered and went out. That was the city. The view stayed the same, but the scene always changed.

It was much like her life, she thought. She seemed to be always alone, always on the verge of some kind of breakdown. Brokenhearted. Yet the various reasons floated by from day to day, week to week, year to year; seemingly changing like the seasons and the city itself.

Tonight was no different. She just had a new reason to be so depressed, so in awe of how little her life thought of her. Someone had once told her that she was put on this Earth to be in service to others. Normally she let lines like those in one ear and out the other. But not that one. That one had stuck, and since then Olivia had begun to believe it. Her soul purpose was to serve. Like her job description stated. Tonight was the first night the inner turmoil really raged within her. To what extent must she serve? How much of herself must she give before she loses herself to the psychosis waiting to overtake her?

No, she wasn't changing her mind. Elliot was too important to her. His family was too important. It just seemed that there had to be an alternative. She had just a week to come up with one.