What Happens In Vegas Chapter 8: Riding Dirty

Stu, Alan and I stood off to the side with Carlos, while Phil talked to valet about getting the car. Stu and Alan were having there own conversation and I was lost in thought. I honestly don't even want to think about what we did last night. I just wanted to find my brother and best friend and make it back home in time for Tracy's wedding. Although I was a little curious as to what happened between Phil and I.

"Are you flippin' your shit?" Phil asked walking up to me.

"Over?" I asked, snatching his coffee and taking a sip.

"The ring, the pictures, whatever happened between us?" He took my hand, examining the ring.

"What do you think happened between us?" I asked, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. He smirked a bit.

"Hey, Phil? I dont think Doug would want us to take the Mercedes." Alan said, cutting Phil off from answering me.

"Relax, we'll be careful."

"My dad is crazy about that car. He left Doug in charge-" Alan worried.

"Alan. We got bigger problems here. Doug and Sam could be in the hospital, they could be hurt, okay. Lets worry about the car later."

Stu nudged my arm with his, as he looked up toward the top of the hotel.

"Uh, guys? Check it out." Stu pointed to the top of the building.

We all turned to see a mattress stuck on the statue atop the buliding.

"Is that the mattress from Doug's room?" Alan asked looking up.

"Oh fuck no." I muttered.

Phil walked over to a guy that was packing his car, "Hey, man, what's going on here?"

"Some asshole threw his bed out the window last night." The guy replied.

"No shit."

"Yeah, some guys just cant handle Vegas." The man replied and then got into his car.

"How the hell did we manage that?" Phil asked in disbelief. Sam would be laughing her ass off right now and be so proud of herself. I laughed a little at the thought.

Suddenly a cop car pulled up in front of us. A valet driver stepped out. "Here's your car, officers."

I let out a shocked laugh and looked at Phil who gave me an uneasy look. "No fucking way."

"Oh, God." Stu muttered.

"All right, everybody act cool. All right, dont say a word." Phil ordered.

"Phil." I started, but he just took my hand and we walked over to the car. "Come on, let's just get in and go. Come on."

I got in the passenger side and Phil walked over to the drivers side.

Alan opened the door and hit the baby in the face. The baby started crying and Stu quickly made sure the baby was okay.

"Alan what the fuck?" I yelled.

"Oh my god. Oh my god. You just nailed the baby." He said as he checked the baby.

"Are my glasses okay?" Alan asked, completely uncaring.

"Your glasses are fine, dick." Stu muttered angrily, climbing into the backseat with Alan.

"This is so illegal." Stu spoke. We had been stuck in a traffic jam for a while.

"No shit Stu." I sighed.

"Can't you see the fun part in anything?" Phil asked, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Yeah." Stu began sarcastically. "We're stuck in traffic in a stolen police car, with what is sure to be a missing child in the back seat. Which part of this is fun?"

"I think the cop car part's pretty cool." Alan chimed in from behind the wire window.

"Me too. I think its kinda funny actually." I said chuckling a little. "I just wanna know how the hell we did it."

Phil turned to me, smiling. "Thank you guys! It is cool." He agreed. "Doug would love it."

Phil honked the horn a few times. "Come on!" I leaned my head against the window, honestly I wasnt freaking out. I was kind of happy actually, I let loose, had a fun night as far as I know. Fuck it. As long as we find Doug and Sam, I dont care.

"Check this out." Phil nudged me with his elbow. Turning the siren on, he pulled the car over and started driving along the sidewalk.

"Oh no. No Phil, no Phil." Stu mumbled repeatedly. "Don't do this."

I moved my head off the window and looked to see Phil with a huge grin plastered on his face.

"Take it easy." He told Stu.

He grabbed the microphone and turned it on. "Attention. Attention , please. Move out of the way. I repeat, please disperse."

"Jamie, are you okay with this?"

I snickered slightly, at how scared he was. "What do you want me to do Stu?"

"Phil stop the car I wanna get out. Stop the car, I wanna get out. Pull over." Stu demanded frantically. I was just praying he didnt run someone over.

"Ma'am in the leopard dress, you have an amazing rack." Phil said to a blonde girl in front of the car. The girl smiled and waved. I turned and looked at Phil, rolling my eyes. Gross.

"Get off the sidewalk! Get off the sidewalk!" Stu yelled at the people.

"I should've been a fucking cop." Phil said, clearly loving this. Stu let out a scream. I shook my head, things just keep getting more and more weird.

After a few more minutes of driving with Phil, we arrived at the hospital. We found the doctor from last night and followed him into a patients room. He sat on a chair and was examining an elderly man.

"Look, I already told you. You came in with a mild concussion, some bruised ribs. No big deal. Although none of you could articulate how it happened." Valsh explained.

"Do you remember, how many of us were here?" Phil questioned further. Valsh continued to examine his patient. I sighed and leaned against the doorframe.

"Ah...I don't know. I think it was just you guys." His eyes scanned the four of us. Then looked toward the baby. "Definitely no baby. And another guy and girl."

"Those are our friends, we're looking for them." I explained.

"Were they okay?" Stu asked with a smile.

"Yeah, they were fine. Just whacked out of their minds. You all were. That other girl was crazy."

"Oh no, Sam." I sighed.

"Yeah, Sam...She couldn't keep her hands off your friend here." He pointed to Alan.

"Wait, her and him were all over each other?" Phils face lit up. Valsh nodded. "Oh my god." Phil was snickering.

"Yes, that would be my wife-" Alan began.

I rolled my eyes. "They aren't together. We're all just friends." As soon as I said that Phil and I glanced at each other, then went to the floor. Phil cleared his throat.

Valsh grabbed some rubber gloves and turned the old man around, and began pulling his underwear down. We all turned away, cringing a bit. Except for Alan who looked extremely amused. Phil and I kept glancing at each other, on and off. There was an odd tension in the air because something happened between us last night, but neither of us knew what is was.

"There you go, and cough." The man coughed. "Cough." Alans head tilted and his mouth opened slightly. "Give me one more." The man coughed again.

We all slowly turned around. "Okay Felix, you can put your robe on. The nurse will be in here in a minute." Valsh smiled, patting his arm. "I'll see you after the weekend."

"Thank you, thank you. Thank you doctor." Felix spoke. Valsh turned to us shaking his head. Stu and I exchanged annoyed glances, and I scoffed.

"Guys I really gotta go. I'm sorry." Valsh rubbed some hand sanatizer on. "I've got surgery up on the fourth floor."

Phil took out a $100 bill, "No I know. But we just need a couple more minutes of your time." He held it in front of Valsh's face.

"Yeah. Tuck it right in there. I don't want to re-sterilize." Phil tucked it into his front pocket. "Walk with me."

"Douchebag." I muttered under my breath and Phil put his hand on mine as we walked down the hallway. He grabbed a Phil's file from last night as we followed him.

"Okay, here we go. Patient name, Phil Wenneck, 2:45 a.m. arrival. Minor concussion, like I said. Some bruising. Pretty standard." He explained, flipping through the pages.

Stu stepped in, reaching his hand over Valsh's shoulder, "Do you mind if I look? I'm actually a doctor."

"Yeah, you said that several times last night. But really, you're just a dentist."

Stu looked pretty defented. I put my hand on his back and tried to give him a smile.

"Okay, this is interesting. Your blood work came in this morning." He read. We gathered around him at one of the desks. "They found a large amount of ruphylin in your system."

I groaned internally. Now I was starting to panick. We were drugged.

"Ru..?" Phil furrowed his eyebrows, unsure.

"Ruphylin? Roofies? Commonly known as the date-rape drug?"

"What, so, what are you saying, I was raped last night?" Phil asked jokingly.

"Actually.." Valsh looked through the papers again. Phil turned to me, worry flashed over his face. I shrugged, eyes wide with concern. "I dont think so." Phil let out a sigh of relief. "But someone did slip you the drug. I'm not suprised you don't remember anything."

Alan laughed, "Doc, none of us can remember anything from last night. Remember?"

"Yeah. How could someone have drugged all of us?" Phil asked, confused.

"Look, I wouldnt worry about it guys. By now the stuff is out of your system. You're gonna be fine." He told us. "I have to go."

"Wait, wait, wait!" Stu stopped him. "Please doctor. Is there anything else? Like, something we may have been talking about, or some pleace we were going?"

"Actually, there was something. You guys kept talking about some wedding last night."

"Yeah. No shit. My brother is getting married tomorrow." I spoke angrily, slapping my hand on the counter. I had no more patience for this guy.

"You know what I want that 100 back." Phil spoke and went to grab his hundred.

"No, no. Easy." Valsh stopped him. "You kept talking about some wedding that you just came from. At the uh...Best Little Chapel."

Realization washed over Phil and him and Stu turned to me. "Great." I muttered.

"You kept saying how sick the wedding was and getting all crazy about it." Valsh said. "Okay? I hope this helps fella's, I really have to leave."

"Best Little Chapel, do you know where that its?" Phil asked, grabbing a pen and paper.

"I do. Its at the corner of Get A Map and Fuck Off."

Phil looked like he wanted to punch the guy.

"I'm a doctor, not a tour guide. Figure it out yourself, okay? You're big boys and girls." Valsh said and left. Phil penned down the name of the chapel.

"Dickhead." I groaned.

We sat outside the hospital for a few moments, just processing.

"I knew the moment he said Ruphylin, that something bad happend."

"How do even know what that is?" Stu looked at me confused.

"How do you not know? Mr. Doctor." I waved my hands. " You think I wanna end up in some bathtub in Mexico City with my spleen carved out."

I put my head in my hands. "And now I married some complete stranger. What am I gonna do?" I started to freak out a bit. This was just getting to crazy.

"Hey, Hey Jamie." He bent down in front of me and put his hands on each side of my face. "We are gonna figure this out, whoever you married, we will get it annulled and you will forget all about it okay?"

"Okay." I smiled and he pushed some hair behind my ear and smiled back.

Stu cleared his throat. "Are you two having a moment or can we get going?"

Phil and I parted. I tried to hide the blush of my cheeks as we all piled into the car once again.