Title: Why Is A Raven Like A Writing Desk?

Characters: Alice Longbottom, Alice Kingsley, Frank Longbottom, and the Mad Hatter.

Notes: So, why is a raven like a writing desk? In some obsure way, Alice Longbottom attempts to figure it out. Cross-over, and of course, I own none of it! I hope you enjoy!


Alice had always felt like she was in Wonderland.

Hogwarts had that sort of feeling - it was beautiful, no doubt, but strange and mysterious and a little bit... mad.

Lily was her Red Queen - beautiful, fiery, intelligent and insane - and James was her Red King - charming, funny, loyal and loopy.

Her Tweedledum and Tweedledee were Marlene McKinnon and Dorcas Meadowes- both lovely in their own right, cute, and a comedy act to be forever upheld - and Sirius was her Cheshire Cat - gorgeous, smiley, cunning and crazy.

Remus was her White Rabbit - forever running late, resourceful, bright and barmy - and Peter was Humpty Dumpty - proud, easily-offended, dim-witted and daft.

Emmeline Vance was her White Queen - gentle, pale, finicky and foolish, and her White King was Benjy Fenwick - lovely, easy-going, noble and nuts.

Frank was her Mad Hatter - handsome, kind, brave and off his head.

Hogwarts was her Wonderland - strange and fascinating and just so slightly out of reach, almost like a dream. They could contradict her, berate her, tell her to stop her obsession over Muggle literature, but she wouldn't listen.

She reckoned that a raven was like a writing desk, because it wasn't at all. And because neither were like the other, therefore, they were alike. At least, that was her theory.

In theory, though, she was a pureblood engaged to a pureblood before she had even left school. In reality, the good little blood traitor girl who was friends with a Muggleborn and fought for house elf rights and was engaged to the man she loved at a time where sides had to be fought for and fought on.

Even Wonderland had good and evil.

And who cared if she was pureblood? It meant nothing, nothing, next to the world she had come to know outside of traditions and expectations.

And she was Alice, so maybe she was a little bit mad anyway.