…

…

She's not afraid

Not afraid to meet

His chocolate gaze

…

…

Love distills desire upon the eyes, love brings bewitching grace into the heart.

"This is boring shit," the hollow complained in his head. A vein throbbed in Ichigo's head. He tightened his grip on his bag and leaned against the wall of the building, "You just sit around, King. It gets dull after a while."

His teeth grounded together, "You know I can't do anything about it. My powers aren't fully restored and you know Mr. Hat-And-Clogs said to stay away from strong spiritual pressures."

"Does it look like I give a shit? Let me out of here and I can…" He had trailed off, but Ichigo knew what he meant. The image of Orihime, smiling and waving happily at him flashed through his mind. For some reason, blazing fire went off in his chest, setting across his stomach and knocking his intestines down to his feet. He had missed that smile so fucking much, "I think there's a reason she doesn't look at you anymore, Kingy…"

"What would you know?" Ichigo growled back with a sneer.

"I know more than you think."

"Look, I'm the one who controls you. Or do I have to come back in there and beat your fucking ass? What do you want with her anyway?" Ichigo had had enough of his hollow's bullshit. Sometimes, he took it all in stride, but now, he was tired of hearing Orihime's name leave his mouth, tired of the hollow constantly thinking of her. It pissed off so much, and he had yet to figure out why it did. But he didn't want to go there, not so deep into his feelings and thoughts.

"I'm your instinct, King. I want everything you want. Except, I crave it like a drug. You just have better control." He could hear the smirk in his voice, mocking him. He sighed and took out his cell phone, checking the time. School would start in exactly an hour. He still had time. Ignoring his hollow's taunts, he continued on his way.

'She doesn't smile at me anymore…,' he whispered in his head, a light frown on his face. 'She doesn't say Hello Kurosaki-kun anymore. She doesn't say Ohayo anymore. Not to me at least.' After Hueco Mundo, after defeating Aizen, after saving her, she had completely disappeared. Not from life, but from herself. Orihime seemed to just float around for the next three months, a void of herself. She didn't usually speak unless she was spoken to and the words were always timid and uncertain and soft and hesitating. When he watched her for those whole three months, he wanted to grasp onto her shoulders and shake the old Orihime out, the bubbly one with bright smiles and random thoughts. Then one day, she just woke up. She laughed and smiled and danced and drew and raised her hand in class and played with her hair and squealed and ate like she used to. Ichigo was so shocked to see it that he had fallen out of his chair. She had turned, her hair swishing around her waist like amber flames. Hazel-gold met chocolate brown. She blinked, her long lashes brushing against her cheeks, as if she had just realized he was there. The blank look in her eyes made his gaze widen, the blank look of deep, black holes, filled with nothing. She could giggle and grin, but her eyes would tell everything. He never thought he would see that; the empty look in her eyes that made his stomach twist. Then the moment was over and she looked away, chattering happily with Chizuru and Tatsuki like nothing had happened.

But he had seen it. He had seen it all.

"And what do you think that means?" His hollow's voice sounded off; concerned. Ichigo continued to walk, ignoring him, "I'm just as worried as you, King. If she doesn't like you then she definitely won't like me."

"Shut up. She's fine. I can tell…" But he had said that months ago. And nothing had changed. Tatsuki seemed worried too, but Ishida ignored it and Chad was busy with work. Ichigo could now see them all drifting apart. When Ichigo finally got a hold of his powers, when he had originally thought he would lose them, he was able to meet with Rukia again. She and Mr. Urahara had explained what was wrong. His spirit energy was out of control, merging with something named his Fullbring. Both being so powerful, he was unable to find control of it, so mostly it just burst out whenever it wanted. He was still able to turn into a Soul Reaper, but it was hard to focus with so much Spiritual Pressure leaking. Renji had claimed it was easier to find him with a grin, Ishida had worried constantly before he acted indifferent, Chad had shrugged and murmured his apologies, and he was too afraid to ask Orihime. She seemed to notice though. Once when they were in the cafeteria and he was heading to the roof, he saw the green energy pulse around his feet. He'd tensed as his being felt lighter. Orihime had glanced over at him with those big eyes before she reached out a tiny hand and clamped it around his shirt. She began to pull him to the ground, stopping him from levitating. It didn't usually happen often, only once a week at night and he would sometimes find himself sleeping on his ceiling. Ichigo turned to thank her, but she was already walking away.

"Stop moping around. It's pissing me off," the hollow complained, his slithering voice echoing around his head. He sighed and thought nothing back, but listened reluctantly. If he continued to think of her, something bad would happen out of it.

"Ichigoooo!" Casually throwing down his bag, Ichigo caught his friend by neck, looping his arms under the brunette's armpits to put him in a headlock. Keigo cried out stridently and wiggled unhappily, screaming and shouting out curses, "Agh! Ichigo! O-Ow! I give, I give!" He smacked his hand against Ichigo's arm for emphasis.

"Ohayo," His orange haired friend said instead as he released Keigo and scooped up his bag. Keigo stood with watery eyes.

"You nearly killed me, Ichigo! How cruel!" He cried.

Ichigo rolled his eyes, "Oh, please. You're fine."

"I'm not! Really! Bruises! I have bruises!"

"Oi! Would you two shut the hell up? It's too early for all that noise!" Tatsuki complained while they both entered the classroom. Mizuiro glanced up from his cell phone at all the yelling then sighed when he saw Keigo hanging off Ichigo like a monkey. Ichigo and him went back and forth, back and forth, this and that, arguing and screaming. They disappeared into a cloud of smoke, punches and kicks knocking into the ground. Ichigo was able to kick the teenager off with a sigh.

"Tatsuki-chaaan!" The voice greeted over the other. Why did he turn around to see her? Why did he want to hear that voice, "Ohayo, Ohayo!"

"Oh, hey, Orihime." Tatsuki turned with a bright smile. "What'd you do…?" Ichigo allowed the sounds to buzz out of his ears as his eyes remained on her. She was smiling today, a little brighter than usual. Her eyes still held the void of life, but held her honey color a little more firmly. She held herself together now. There were no bags under her eyes, but her skin appeared abnormally pale. Ichigo watched her for a few more moments, watching as she went around to everyone in the classroom and squealed their names while saying, "Ohayo!"

Ichigo didn't even wait. He knew, before everything, before the hollows, before Rukia, before everyone, she would scream to the high heavens, "Ohayo, Kurosaki-kuuun!" And he would blush and cringe back in grade school when the boys stared at him with clear disdain. But Orihime would always giggle and blabber about her day. Reluctantly, Ichigo would listen and he would become interested and amused by her vivid mind. She would blush and hit his shoulder as they became quick friends. Then Tatsuki would hit him over the head, call him a pervert, and order for him to stay away from Orihime before she bashed his brains in. Of course, back then, everything was simple. Orihime and Ichigo had depended on each other; her brother being dead and him losing his mother had drawn them to each other. She began to lean on him for comfort and Tatsuki was there to dry her tears. The three of them together was unstoppable. They would play pranks together, well, him and Tatsuki; afterward Orihime would scold them with the teachers. And Orihime would bake; she would run to each of their houses and drop off the baked goods. Ichigo had nearly eaten them every Saturday. Then they would meet by the lake and skip the rocks and giggle. Well, until high school, when Tatsuki claimed Ichigo was too much of a boy to hang out with the two girls. That didn't stop him from going to the movies with them, and walking Tatsuki to the dojo, and protecting Orihime from the perverts out there.

Back then, all Ichigo had to do was look next to him and Orihime would be there with wide honey eyes and a delicate hand on his shoulder to tell him right from wrong. All the time. She was there. And then Rukia came and Orihime slowly seemed to disappear from his side. Whenever he had asked if she was alright, she would giggle and assure him quickly, not tell him about her day and squeal about the shows she watched the night before. Sure, he had the Soul Reaping and his family and school, but that didn't mean he didn't have time for his friends. When Orihime had left, left him with no answer to Hueco Mundo and was termed as a traitor, Ichigo had thought of that tiny girl, who had ridden in the hospital with her older brother, bashed and bloody and wide-eyed, he knew that wasn't possible. He had to go save her, defeat Aizen, show what he could do. And when he had stared into those hazel eyes, happy and claiming how strong she was and mouth open in a bright grin, he knew all the screaming and pain and loss was worth it.

So…why? Why wasn't she happy? Why wasn't she rushing herself into his arms, shouting about the future and laughing about things in her head? Why wasn't she calling him in the middle of the night to tell him of a nightmare? Why wasn't she happy? Why did he feel like it was his fault?

"Because it is, idiot," but the hollow sounded confused too. He didn't want to show it, but he was concerned of what he called, The Queen, in his world. And as much as he wanted to yell at his hollow and thrust himself in his inner world to tell him to stop calling her that, he knew that the asshole wouldn't. He had felt his demon moving prior, digging around in the sinister parts of his soul, searching for her, rummaging for more memories of her. He had moved inside him earlier when Orihime had pulsed through his mind and it was usually harder from Ichigo to contain the hollow when he thought of the girl. "Then let me speak with her. Let me see what the problem is." He was impatient, pacing on one of the sideways building, his Zanpakuto clutched tightly in one pale hand.

"Shut the hell up! Kami, what is with you today?" Ichigo found himself screaming at him. He didn't want to think of her, not now. He had lost her over three months ago. Getting her back to his side was pointless. "And it's too dangerous now. I can feel you surfacing. If I get near her, you'll just attack."

He could feel the hollow's grin, stretching the skin, wide ear-to-ear, "Maybe. Want to put that up to test?"

"Ichigo!" He looked up at his name and saw Ishida standing over his desk. He rolled his eyes and leaned back into his seat, his mood souring incredibly now. Uryu's eyebrow twitched. He placed Kon, the plush toy on his desk, the arm on him carefully and precisely sowed so it looked like it wasn't damaged at all. Ichigo reluctantly put the lion toy into his bag as Uryu handed him the Mod-Soul pill. Ichigo muttered a thanks; he wouldn't want Kon jumping from his bag to attack the girls in the class. He could feel an argument start between them and Rukia would usually break them up, but with her still in Soul Society for the last couple months, there was no one to step between them. Uryu leaned down with a scowl, "Control your energy. It's practically bursting the room!"

Ichigo's eyes widened. But it was true. Some of the girls were crouched down, confused with wide eyes. The windows looked like they were going to crack and all his friends were staring at him, hunched over chairs and desks to keep themselves upright. The only one who was standing straight in the classroom was Orihime. She stood tall, her eyes directly on him, haunted, absorbing, looking through him. He stomach twisted as their gazes met and locked. He took in a deep breath and it vanished almost instantly. Readjusting his watch that was supposed to contain his spiritual pressure. The screen was slightly cracked from his last onslaught. He was such an idiot sometimes. Uryu let out a sigh of relief while everyone stood, rubbing a hand across their heads with breaths of liberation. Tatsuki, Keigo, Chad, and Mizuiro risked a glance at the Substitute Soul Reaper. He clenched his fists and sighed unhappily as class started, still confused of what just happened.

Orihime didn't look at him the rest of the period.

…

…

Drunk on her beauty

Fire dances behind her eyes

…

…

"Hey, Ishida," the young Quincy looked over at his somewhat friend and stopped short when he saw the intense look in his eye. Ichigo sucked on the straw of his juice box and leaned over the rail of the roof, "Does…does Orihime talk to you?" Ishida's eyes widened before he fixed his expression, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. He should've known this question was coming, should've known Ichigo would finally say something over the last few months. He had thought, at first, that Ichigo was an idiot, that he didn't notice what Orihime was doing, but he guess he was wrong.

For some reason, a chuckle escaped his lips before he turned to his miserably confused friend, "She doesn't treat everyone like you, Kurosaki." Before he knew it, he was pinned against the rail, Ichigo standing over him with a fiery gaze. Uryu froze, his eyes growing wide at the ferocity in Ichigo's gaze. His hands were balled into his ironed, pressed shirt and jerking his upper body up, "Kurosaki!" He growled in obvious anger and surprise. His friend wasn't usually violent, at least, not to him or their other companions. Chad and Keigo's attention was diverted to the two. Chad stood instantly and grasped the back of Ichigo's shirt to yank him off of the Quincy. Ichigo stumbled back, his teeth gnashed together and his eyes hard. Uryu tried to keep his usual stoic composure, but found it difficult to find his breath. He had never seen Ichigo that irate; not when he lost to Grimmjow, not when he was almost killed by Byakuya, and not when he was called weak over and over again. Never.

"W-What the hell is wrong with you, baka? It's not my fault that you ruined it!" Uryu cried out roughly, his unstable blood pressure boiled angrily.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Ichigo growled back, trying to fight out of Chad's enormous strength. "How did I ruin anything? I saved her!"

"And what if she didn't want to be saved? What if she didn't want any of that, Kurosaki? How do you think she got her powers? Because she felt useless! That's the only reason she kept trying! Because she felt hopeless, desperate, reckless! She hated it. And being the person she is, she went to Hueco Mundo to keep us all safe. To keep us all together! She was trying to save us. Trying to help. Do you know how many times we have taken her for granted? How many times we've almost died and she has saved us? How many times we've pushed her away from battle and called her powers useless and spit on her dreams? Why do you think she's ignoring you, Kurosaki? After you almost murdered me, almost gutted out that Espada, after you almost got yourself killed, got a hole punched through your chest? Don't you think she's been through enough? She's seen enough blood and hate and tears? Leave her alone, you fucking idiot!"

There was silence. Nothing to say. Chad slowly released his orange haired friend while Uryu panted, unable to believe he had just spat all those words. Keigo shifted uncomfortably, still confused with the whole souls and spirits thing. Ichigo, well, he didn't know what to think. But…that's what he was supposed to do. Protect her from everything…protect her…keep her from battling…Was it true? Had he stepped all over her, termed her as useless, taken her for granted? No. He wouldn't…

"Mr. Urahara is probably right, Inoue. It would…be better if you stayed out of the front line…"

And he remembered her big honey eyes widening, widening, widening with crushed hope. He had completely ignored it, completely forgotten. His stomach churn and he felt acid stir in his throat. He was wrong. He was just like everyone else. He hadn't treated her any different, hadn't gave her any special treatment. He had remembered, when Rukia had told him.

"Sometimes, I just feel so useless…"

"I wouldn't…" He found himself murmuring.

"You would." Uryu panted with a disgusted look on his face, "And I'm no different."

Then he was gone.

…

…

Rain sticks to her cheeks

They remind her of cold tears

She can only dream

…

…

Let her still be here. The school day had ended a while ago. They had waited in the library earlier for Ishida to finish the sewing bullshit. Ichigo desperately ran through the halls, feeling the emotions crash through him, hardening his face, his eyes, scowling his lips. He was such an idiot. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot. All the times Byakuya and Renji and Rukia and Tatsuki had called him a baka, they were fucking right. So right that it hurt.

She went to the club, too, right? Right?

"And what if she didn't want to be saved?"

"Because she felt hopeless, desperate, reckless!"

"Do you know how many times we have taken her for granted?"

No. She didn't feel that…not every day. She couldn't have…she couldn't…

Those blank eyes. Hazel and pooled into tears. He had saved her though. He had helped her so much; taken her away from her nightmare, saved her from all the Espadas. And he hadn't realized how much he had needed her.

"Ichigo, what the hell are you doing?" Tatsuki spat as she closed the classroom door behind her. He slowed down and hunched over, placing his hands on his knees. He had run all the way from the roof. Sweat beaded onto his forehead and jaw. "Ichigo? Answer me, idi—"

"Shut up."

Tatsuki's eyes widened and she bristled highly at the sharp tone and the sharper gaze. What the hell was his problem…? But she was quiet as she stared up at him. His eyes. She could take disdain and hurt and grief. But she couldn't take that look. That look that makes her wants to vomit out the truth, that looks that makes her tongue tie, that look that makes her shiver for her own safety. But she was Tatsuki Arisawa and she had beaten this guy how many times?

"W-What's up with you?"

He gripped her shoulders hard and shook her, probably creating bruises, but at the moment, he could care less. "How long?"

"What—"

"How long have you known? How she felt?"

Her eyes widened considerably. So he had figured out, had he? Or did Ishida or Sado tell him? "Months. But Orihime has always felt like—"

"And after everything, everything, you decide to tell me now?"

"Y-You're the idiot for now noticing!" Then she softened, his angry gaze penetrating through the warrior everyone knew and loved, the warrior who could take down anyone, who could flip over a five hundred pound man and laugh about her broken arm, but now… "She…didn't want m-me to tell you. I swear, Ichigo—"

But he was already gone.

…

…

Stabs right through

Her big heart

…

…

"Orihime!"

Nothing.

"Orihime!"

No response.

"Orihime!"

Curious hazel eyes blinked, glancing away from the ground. Then she turned around. He hadn't noticed…he hadn't noticed how she had grown. Not just physically but mentally, too. Her face had lost its baby fat, accentuating her high cheekbones, the delicate curve of her button nose, thick, long, long eyelashes that were dark with her pink cheeks, and her wide eyes. Her pinks lips were full, a great contrast to her pale, freshly-fallen snow skin. Her hair had grown out, flowing down her slender back, now so long it curled around her waist. Her bangs were brushed back by those pretty barrettes. Her breasts moved with her steps, her waist was tiny compared to her flared out hips. The long socks gripped her legs tight and her skirt, which Ichigo had barely noticed over the years, was way too fucking short for him. Her hair blazed around her as she turned. Her eyes widened, resembling an owl's or a doe's, frightened of what would come next. For the first time in months, he saw emotions in those hazel pools, bright with fear and anxiety, sparking something in his chest. Her face appeared to soften significantly from the emotions dancing across her face.

Then it was gone.

Just like that.

Why?

"Stop that." He said when he finally made it to her.

She continued to walk as if she hadn't heard him.

"Stop, Orihime."

No answer.

"Orihime! Just…please."

Nothing.

"Hear me out, Orihime! Fuck! Please!"

She froze. The shadow of the giant building hovered over her while Ichigo stood in the orange sunlight. He was so far away from her. So far…How?

"Gomen, Kurosaki-kun. Is there something wrong?" her tone made him flinch back. So dull, no happiness. Then it was like she flipped a switch. She whirled around, blush coming to her cheeks, her face sliding into that carefree mask she used for everyone with the fake smile and empty eyes, "I've been so tired lately! Hehe! Gomen, gomen, Kurosaki-kun!"

"Stop." He whispered, crunching his hands into fists. She froze again and Ichigo watched as the mask slipped away and the blank look was back, "Stop doing that. Tell me, Orihime. Whatever I did—"

"Kurosaki-kun, it's getting pretty late. I have to go." She continued to walk.

Ichigo's hand reached out on its own record and wrapped around her covered forearm. He had almost forgotten the soft, new winter sweaters they got. Tan and long; reached down to her palms. She tensed instantly at his touch, her eyes widening into saucers. "D-Don't tell me you're walking home alone."

He was surprised. More than surprised when tears filled her eyes. So deep and watery that he felt like he could drown into them. She turned her head towards him. Then there was anger. Fury. Rage. She yanked her arm away from his grasp, her teeth clenched together as her eyes blazed. "I don't need your help, Kurosaki-kun!" The tears overflowed, spilled, spilled, spilled down her red cheeks. Was it bad that he yearned to see any expression on her face, even this one, this…this tormented look that made his stomach clench, "I don't need you to protect me! I…I can do it on my own!" She screeched so loud that his ears rung. How she said, it appeared as if she had been waiting to get that off her chest, to scream that at him, just to make him leave her the fuck alone.

Just to go away.

Just to go away!

His mouth fell open and a huge gust of air broke out, "I-Inoue…"

"And don't call me Orihime, Kurosaki-kun."

…

…

And she dreams

One day

He'll say it

…

…

Tell me what you think, please. Sorry if some things don't add up for you. Ichigo's powers are a little more complex for me...And some of the past is twisted for the story.