Green Eggs and Hamlet

WARNING: This is slightly twisted, and not horribly Shakespearian.

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Ghost:

I am Dead

Dead I am

Hamlet:

That stupid ghost

That stupid ghost

I do not like

That stupid ghost

Ghost:

Would you like to take revenge?

Hamlet:

I would not like to,

My dead dad

Killing people's

Very bad!

Ghost:

Would you kill my brother here or there?

Hamlet:

I would not kill him

Here or there.

I would not kill

Him anywhere.

I would not like to

Kill the King,

Killing people's

Very mean.

Ghost:

Would you kill him

Over here?

Would you kill him

With a spear?

Hamlet:

I would not kill him

Over here.

I would not kill him

With a spear.

I would not kill him

Here or there.

I would not kill

Him anywhere.

I would not like to

Kill the King,

Killing people's

Very mean.

Ghost:

Would you stab him

In his bed?

Put a dagger through

His head?

Hamlet:

I would not stab him

In his bed.

Or put a dagger through

His head.

I would not kill him

Over here.

I would not kill him

With a spear.

I would not kill him

Here or there.

I would not kill

Him anywhere.

I would not like to

Kill the King,

Killing people's

Very mean.

Ghost:

Would you, could you

End his power?

Would you push him

Off this tower?

Hamlet:

I would not, could not

End his power.

I would not push him

Off this tower.

I would not kill him

Over here.

I would not kill him

With a spear.

I would not kill him

Here or there.

I would not kill

Him anywhere.

I would not like to

Kill the King,

Killing people's

Very mean.

Ghost:

Would you, could you

Hear my case?

Would you strike him

With a mace?

Hamlet:

I would not, will not

Hear your case.

I would not strike him

With a mace.

I would not, could not

End his power.

I would not push him

Off this tower.

I would not kill him

Over here.

I would not kill him

With a spear.

I would not kill him

Here or there.

I would not kill

Him anywhere.

I would not like to

Kill the King,

Killing people's

Very mean.

Ghost:

Would you burn him

At the stake?

Would you hit him

With a rake?

Hamlet:

I would not burn him

At the stake.

I would not hit him

With a rake.

I would not, will not

Hear your case.

I would not strike him

With a mace.

I would not, could not

End his power.

I would not push him

Off this tower.

I would not kill him

Over here.

I would not kill him

With a spear.

I would not kill him

Here or there.

I would not kill

Him anywhere.

I would not like to

Kill the King,

Killing people's

Very mean.

Ghost:

Would you grab him

By his hair?

Would you throw him

Down the stair?

Hamlet:

I would not grab him

By his hair.

I would not throw him

Down the stair.

I would not burn him

At the stake.

I would not hit him

With a rake.

I would not, will not

Hear your case.

I would not strike him

With a mace.

I would not, could not

End his power.

I would not push him

Off this tower.

I would not kill him

Over here.

I would not kill him

With a spear.

I would not kill him

Here or there.

I would not kill

Him anywhere.

I would not like to

Kill the King,

Killing people's

Very mean.

Ghost:

Say!

In the dark!

Here in the dark!

Would you, could you

In the dark?

Hamlet:

I would, not could not

In the dark.

I would not grab him

By his hair.

I would not throw him

Down the stair.

I would not burn him

At the stake.

I would not hit him

With a rake.

I would not, will not

Hear your case.

I would not strike him

With a mace.

I would not, could not

End his power.

I would not push him

Off this tower.

I would not kill him

Over here.

I would not kill him

With a spear.

I would not kill him

Here or there.

I would not kill

Him anywhere.

I would not like to

Kill the King,

Killing people's

Very mean.

Ghost:

You do not want to

Kill the king?

What if I could

Make him sing?

What if I could

Do a play,

Which would make him

Rue the day,

That he poured poison

In my ear?

We could make him

Pay so dear!

Hamlet:

Dad,

If you will let me be,

I will try it.

You will see!

Hamlet:

Say!

You're right!

The king's a twit!

I will roast him

On a spit!

I will roast him

'Till he's dead!

Then I will chop off

His head.

I will grab him

By his hair.

I will throw him

Down the stair.

I will burn him

At the stake.

I will hit him

With a rake.

I would and will

Hear your case.

I will strike him

With a mace.

I will and can

End his power.

I will push him

Off this tower.

I will kill him

Over here.

I will kill him

With a spear.

I will kill him

Here or there.

I will kill

Him anywhere.

I am so mad

He killed you dad!

I'll kill the king!

He's very bad!

Hamlet:

I'll kill Polonius,

And Laertes, too!

A killing spree!

Oh whoop-de-doo!

Hamlet:

Drat!

I am poisoned

So I fear.

I fear my end is

Very near.

Hamlet:

Would you make sure

My tale is told?

Would you tell it

Very bold?

Hamlet:

Thank you!

Thank you!

My dead dad,

You've driven me

A little mad.

Hamlet:

As you see,

I've done my best.

Now that damn ghost

Can finally rest.

Hamlet:

My unsolicited and

Horrid violence,

Has caused my death,

"The rest is silence."