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Title: Seishun Kyosokyoku

Summary: AU Orochimaru takes a genin team. That poor, poor man. 17 moments of spring.

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1.

Orochimaru was not in the least bit lonely and certainly did not feel neglected just because his teacher was preoccupied with his Hokage duties, Tsunade was preoccupied with dreams of a medic-nin corp and her new boyfriend, and Jiraiya was preoccupied with foreign hotsprings full of attractive foreign women in distant foreign lands, oh, and intelligence-gathering, of course. Orochimaru was certainly not at loose ends just because every other member of his team seemed to have found their path in life and duties to attend to.

Orochimaru certainly did not need a genin team to bring fulfillment into his life.

He still got one though. In the spring of his nineteenth year, Orochimaru became a jounin-sensei.

(When he protested that he was too young to take care of three brats, being still a teenager himself, if only just, Sarutobi-sensei had just smiled around his pipe and said, "I'm sure you will do splendidly. I have full faith in your abilities, Orochimaru." Orochimaru certainly did not preen despite himself and lose the threat of the conversation.)

2.

His team consisted of three misfits, ages 11 to 12: Naruto, Karin and Kimimaro. (Ironically, Kimimaro, the most mature, was also the youngest, a full year younger than Karin.) All three were orphans. All three belonged to near-extinct clans. All three were isolated, socially-incapable misfits.

Orochimaru carefully ignored how well that described him as a genin as well.

3.

Although Naruto didn't remember her, since she died when he was just a baby, Naruto's grandmother Mito played a very important role in shaping his life.

Mito's health had been declining steeply by the time Naruto was born, and it was widely believed she would not live out the year.

However, she did not die of illness or old age.

The day Mito died was the day Naruto's life changed forever. It was also one of the darkest days in Konoha's history, and the day the proud Senju clan was reduced to only two – the then-genin Tsunade and her baby brother.

That day, an unknown enemy infiltrated the village and the Senju compound itself, and unleashed the demon that had been contained inside Mito, the Kyuubi. It caused untold devastation, leveling a full third of the village and all but destroying the Senju.

But before she was a Senju, Mito was an Uzumaki, and with the last of her life, she sealed the rampaging demon in her tiny grandson.

That was how Naruto became a jinchuuriki.

4.

Although Naruto didn't remember it, he and Orochimaru had met before, for a certain value of "met."

Orochimaru was predisposed to dislike Naruto for two reasons. One, the many, many babysitting missions his team had been assigned after Tsunade lost her family. Sarutobi-sensei had insisted that they needed to support their teammate in her time of need, and that apparently meant looking after her loud, smelly menace of a baby brother, who had a distressing tendency to pull Orochimaru's hair, which led to much mocking from Jiraiya.

Two, Naruto's first words to him once they were (re)introduced – "Sensei, are you a man or a woman?"

5.

Kimimaro was the only survivor of the Kaguya clan. Although Orochimaru privately thought it was quite a waste, it was probably for the best. They had been insane, bloodthirsty lunatics who had roamed the countryside and mindlessly attacked civilian settlements until Konoha was hired to exterminate them. Kimimaro was the last of his clan standing and became the only survivor. Once all the rest were gone, he had simply stopped fighting, not resisting when the Konoha shinobi who had been hired to kill the Kaguya took him back with them.

6.

Although he was a genius possessing incredible bloodline ability and skill, and the one most like Orochimaru on the team, Orochimaru didn't think there was any way he could truly understand Kimimaro. How could he simply live among the very people who had killed his parents, his family and his entire clan? It was as if Kimimaro had never cared for any of them. It was incomprehensible to Orochimaru.

7.

Karin was one of the few survivors of Uzushio's destruction. She had been just a child, but even then her sensor abilities had been the best in generations. That was how she had managed to survive the trek to Konoha alone – that and her other ability, the kinjutsu. By the time she made it to Konoha, she was half-feral.

She had a tendency to bite, the Academy instructors warned Orochimaru.

Looking at her try to claw Naruto's throat out after some poorly-conceived remark on his part, he thought she might have gotten even more feral in the process of becoming a genin.

8.

Her fascination with Kimimaro was frankly disturbing. Orochimaru drew the line when he caught her picking up discarded finger bone bullets after a practice session.

The fact that he had been doing the same was irrelevant – it was for research purposes!

That fact did, however, ensure a bitter enmity between the two of them, as Karin insisted they were now rivals.

9.

Their first C-rank went horribly wrong.

It started as a simple courier mission. Naruto, the only one born and raised in Konoha, had been beyond excited to finally see the world beyond its walls. He had run ahead, and Orochimaru had let him. In the warm spring sunshine, the rumors of a new war seemed distant and unimportant.

None of them noticed the trap that had been laid across the main path to and from the village. It sprung without warning…

There was so much blood.

Orochimaru froze for a moment. All he could see was his student's mutilated body. All he could think was how he had failed Tsunade. His other students, no strangers to violence and death, fell into defensive positions, scanning the surroundings for enemies.

But then, suddenly, Karin fell to her knees and screamed. Ominous red chakra began to leak from Naruto's body, enveloping it like a bloody shroud. As they watched, transfixed, his wounds began to close, and he stood slowly, his eyes crimson and feral.

Every shinobi in Konoha had cursed the Kyuubi, but at that moment, Orochimaru could only be grateful.

10.

Their "true" genin test was not the bell test, no matter how significant it would have been. Orochimaru wasn't a great believer in teamwork, and he had no intention of sending his genin the message that they should disobey his orders. Instead, he simply told them to come at him with the full extent of their powers, as if this was a real battle and he was their enemy.

Not being an offensive type, Karin had immediately retreated into the forest. Orochimaru planned to give her some time to set up traps, to show off her skills. On the opposite end of the scale, Naruto rushed in recklessly. Like his namesake, his attack was a wild maelstrom of Shadow Clones and water jutsus favored by the Senju. Knowing his element, Orochimaru let the battle move closer to the small pond.

Neither were particularly impressive, not coming even close to truly surprising or cornering him, but they had potential. This was just an assessment, in the end.

It was Kimimaro who surprised him.

His taijutsu was smooth and deadly, expertly utilizing the Dances the Kaguya clan had been famous for. Even more amazing had been his Shikotsumyaku bloodline. The finger bullets had been so unexpected they had actually managed to hit Orochimaru, though he avoided any serious damage. The arm bone swords were sturdy and sharp enough to actually chip Orochimaru's own sword.

It was like Kimimaro carried a portable, light, nigh-inexhaustible supply of personal weaponry. Very useful.

But most impressive of all was how Kimimaro's skin simply sealed up again afterward, as if it had never been parted.

11.

Being a team of three males and a girl, embarrassing situations were inevitable. Although they never spoke of it, Orochimaru had in fact walked in on Tsunade during their genin days, and vice versa.

Thus, Orochimaru fully expected some nudity shenanigans with Karin. (He also secretly expected her to be on the "giving" end, rather than the receiving, as would usually be the case.)

He didn't expect it on their first D-rank.

The mission had been a disaster that left his students covered in mud and dirt.

"I can't believe you, moron!" Karin had screeched. "How can you make this much of a mess out of catching a cat?"

"Hey, at least I did something!" Naruto shot back. "You just stood there!" He shook himself like a dog, spraying water and mud everywhere. Karin shrieked and lunged for his throat with deadly accuracy, despite her glasses being completely covered in gunk.

Orochimaru caught her by the back of her coat, delicately, so as not to get muddy himself. "I believe we can all learn some important lessons from this," he said calmly.

"Cats don't like water," Naruto decided.

"Skills are situational," Kimimaro said quietly. "There is a time and place for everything. And catching a cat is not the right time or place for water jutsus." He stood calmly to one side, looking entirely unmoved by the mud on his clothes and in his hair and by the yowling beast trapped by a bone cage in his arms.

"That's right," Orochimaru said, giving him (what he hoped was) a kind smile.

"Teacher's pet," Naruto whispered.

Letting out an articulate noise of frustration, Karin wrenched herself from Orochimaru's grip and began to storm off. "I can't report to the Hokage like this. I'm going to get this gunk off me!" she yelled over her shoulder. "You better not peak, Naruto!"

"Who'd want to?" Naruto yelled back, while Kimimaro pointedly ignored her.

Despite Naruto's words, it was only minutes before he snuck off, snickering. Orochimaru sighed but let him go – though Jiraiya had never quite learned not to peak at Tsunade, his stealth skills improved immensely after she almost beat him to death… a couple times. And Naruto wasn't a super pervert like Orochimaru's teammate. His intention was more on getting Karin off-guard for a prank than in anything truly indecent.

Maybe Karin would learn to be more on guard too. A learning experience all around, Orochimaru thought, nodding to himself.

…Then he remembered the extent of Jiraiya's injuries (with a small shudder). He thought about Karin's lack of restraint, compared to Tsunade. He considered Tsunade's deep love for her baby brother and how he always quietly thought that he might have been given Naruto as a student because Tsunade would trust no one else with him.

And he also pondered what Tsunade might theoretically do to the man who let her beloved baby brother be seriously injured.

Learning situations should be properly monitored, Orochimaru decided. For everyone's safety.

As he headed after Naruto, Kimimaro glanced at him with a sort of placid interest and followed without a word. Nice boy, that one, knew when not to ask questions.

Their progress was interrupted by a female shriek, signifying that Naruto had been discovered. The tone was certainly angry and offended, but there was a faint undercurrent of distress that Orochimaru had never heard from the rather tough Karin. It made him instinctively rush ahead, Body Flickering into the clearing where Karin had decided to wash off.

Instead of trying to take off Naruto's head, Karin was clutching her jacket to her chest in a wounded manner that had even Naruto on guard and worried. But what Karin tried to cover up were not her breasts – which they couldn't see anyway, since she was still in her chainmail undershirt – but rather the repeated spiral patterns spreading across her shoulders and arms.

"I-I'll rip your throat out, bastard!" Karin snarled, but her voice wobbled. Spotting Orochimaru, and Kimimaro following him, she gasped and turned away, her shoulders shaking. "Don't look!" She fumbled with her shirt before finally managing to shove it back on.

"What's with the tattoos?" Naruto wondered, as Karin finally turned to face them again.

She glared at him. "They're not tattoos," she said bitterly, looking away and putting one hand on her shoulder, where the spirals had been most numerous. "They're… marks. They're from my technique, Misogi Zenku. Once a day, I can heal myself completely, no matter how serious the injury, but… it's forbidden. It whittles away your life. With every use, a new mark appears and your life is shortened by a few years. Even for an Uzumaki, it can add up…"

"There were eleven," Kimimaro said suddenly, making Karin flush and fold in herself. "…So you would have died eleven times without it… That's eleven too many." Kimimaro met Karin's startled gaze evenly. "I will make sure you do not need to use it again," he said.

Karin blushed.

12.

Looking at them, Orochimaru wondered if Sarutobi-sensei hadn't just chosen the three genin hardest to kill.

Really, you just suggest a few experiments that require human subjects, and suddenly everyone thinks you're some depraved evil mad scientist.

13.

Tsunade stopped by. She even brought her new boyfriend.

"You gave him Grandpa's necklace?" Naruto demanded first thing, pointing at the small crystal hanging around Dan's neck.

Tsunade blushed faintly, a sight that made Orochimaru shudder. Something should just not occur, ever. For a moment, she looked uncomfortable, but then Dan laid a comforting had on her shoulder.

Her new boyfriend laughed, easygoing and kind. "Don't worry, Naruto-kun," he said easily. "I think you'll make a fine Godaime. I plan to retire early, raise a family…"

Suddenly a little flustered, Naruto fluttered his arms as he tried to decide how to approach this. Orochimaru could see his mental process: "He acknowledged me! He thinks I'll make a great Hokage!" and "But he wants to be Hokage before me! He's a rival!" and also "He's my sister's boyfriend, the enemy!"

That last one won out.

"What kind of guy gets jewelry?" Naruto demanded. "You're the one who's supposed to give stuff to her! Did you let her propose too?"

"Naruto!"

Tsunade's fist met her brother's skull.

14.

"Nee-san could do so much better," Naruto muttered, peering through the foliage at the Tsunade and her new boyfriend.

Orochimaru found himself nodding in agreement, before he realized with whom he was agreeing.

Just to be contrary, he asked, "Well then, who would you suggest?"

'…Who would be worth Tsunade?' he wondered as Naruto fell into a brooding silence.

He didn't fancy Tsunade himself. But she was his teammate, she was amazing, and she could do so much better. Even if Dan was a skilled and powerful shinobi of impressive lineage, kind and thoughtful, a rising star in the village. ...She could still do better.

…But with whom?

Orochimaru's first thought was Jiraiya. Fortunately, he had long since learned to think twice.

His second thought was Sakumo, who had mentored them when Sarutobi was too busy, who was absolutely amazing in every way… who was also happily engaged.

"Nobody's worthy of Nee-san," Naruto grumbled. "All guys are total perverts who don't deserve her." He watched Tsunade smile happily as Dan whispered something to her. She laid her head on his shoulder and together, they walked down the street, a picture of happiness. "But I suppose I'll have to settle for him…" Naruto grumbled.

"Hrm," Orochimaru drew out.

"But if he makes Nee-san sad, I'm gonna kill him… slowly," Naruto added.

Orochimaru laid a teacherly hand on his shoulder. "I can show you how to make a man suffer in agony for seven days without rest, Naruto-kun," he said.

Something in his chest felt vaguely warm. It was a bit disconcerting.

15.

"Do you guys want to go see the sakura together?" Naruto asked.

"With you?" Karin asked, somewhat rhetorically, raising an eyebrow skeptically. Instead, she turned to Kimimaro. "I'd love to go with you, Kimimaro. It would be so romantic…"

"Flower viewing…" Kimimaro repeated, raising one hand to his chin in thought. "Konoha has beautiful sakura trees, doesn't it?"

Naruto shrugged. "Yeah. Grandfather grew them, supposedly. The ones lining the spring festival path are the most amazing. They're really tall and there are so many petals, it's almost like snow. This year, Nee-chan's going with her boyfriend. She told me if I followed her, we'd be doing 'special training' for the next month." He shuddered at the thought. "It's too weird going alone, but I guess I might go with Sakura-chan…"

"Oh-ho," Karin drew out, pushing up her glasses. "Sakura-chan, huh? So there's a girl you like? A girl who's willing to go flower viewing with you? Who would have thought!"

"It's not like that!" Naruto protested, turning bright red. "Sakura-chan is Dan's little sister! We're practically siblings! Ew, ew!"

Suddenly, Kimimaro nodded. "Very well," he said, turning back to his teammates and picking up a conversation thread they had all but forgotten about. "We will go together. It is a group activity and suitable for team bonding." He nodded again, satisfied with his decision.

Karin squeed a little, latching on to his arm. "I'd love to go with you!" she exclaimed. Her glasses gleamed as she schemed, 'I'll just have to make sure stupid Naruto gets lost somewhere! Maybe some laxatives in his ramen…'

"What about you, sensei?" Naruto asked, turning to their teacher.

Orochimaru seemed lost in his own thoughts, and he continued to stare into the distance even as he answered, "I hate sakura. What point is there in reveling in mortality?" He scowled, a cold, sneering expression.

"Yeah, it's kinda sad when they all fall off," Naruto agreed. "But that's okay 'cause they'll bloom again next year, even prettier."

16.

"Sensei, what the hell is that?"

It took Orochimaru a moment to register that the bothersome noise behind him was a voice… a voice that certainly wasn't supposed to be there.

"What are you doing in my lab?" he demanded, once he finally processed the meaning what he was seeing and hearing.

Karin, who had been the one to speak, crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "Lab? You mean cave, right? A dank, stale, dark cave."

"You missed training, sensei," Naruto said. "So we came to your house to check up on." He looked around – or rather tried to. The gloom was so pervasive, even the exact dimensions were hidden in darkness. "Geez, it really is dark. This can't be healthy."

Orochimaru hissed at him. Why did Tsunade have to go and get her brother involved in her health and fitness obsession?

"Can't you manage by yourselves?" he demanded. "My teammates and I trained alone quite well when Sarutobi-sensei was busy. Show some independence."

"You've been missing for two weeks," Karin told him.

"Sixteen days," Kimimaro corrected, studying one of Orochimaru's experiments with mild curiosity. He tilted his head to one side, trying to figure out whether it was a mutated heart, a skinned squirrel or possibly an immature fetus.

Somewhere in the darkness, something crashed and broke noisily. "Sorry!" Naruto called out, followed by more sounds of destruction.

"What are you doing to my experiments?" Orochimaru demanded. His eyes darted toward the continuing noise, only to be dragged back to Kimimaro, who had picked up the jar he had been staring at and was now trying to pull out the heart/squirrel/fetus. "Don't touch that!" Orochimaru ordered, resisting the doleful look Kimimaro gave him.

"Found it!" Naruto called out, and then there was light. Sudden, blinding light that seared Orochimaru's eyes and made him drop to his knees, blinking away tears.

He looked up to see Naruto approach, haloed by a golden glow. "I found the window," Naruto exclaimed happily. "Should air things out a bit." Turning to his teacher, he paused and looked concerned. "Sensei… you look terrible."

"Like a corpse," Karin put in. "An emaciated snake-y corpse."

"You need some sunlight, and ramen," Naruto decided, grabbing Orochimaru by the arm and dragging him through the newly-revealed maze of books, scrolls and unidentifiable old experiments. "Let's go to Ichiraku's!"

"Ramen again?" Karin complained. "I'm gonna get fat!"

Orochimaru tried to struggle, but it was futile – Tsunade must have been giving her brother some extra training, because his grip was like solid steel. All of his protest went completely ignored.

Kimimaro brought up in the back, the jar and its mysterious contents tucked under one arm. Unseen by anyone, the heart/squirrel/fetus wiggled ominously.

17.

Orochimaru certainly did not need a genin team to bring fulfillment into his life.

He still got it though.

In the spring of his nineteenth year, Orochimaru became a jounin-sensei. They were loud, annoying and they drove him insane. He never quite knew whether he wanted to kill them or himself. He never had a moment's peace. His days were filled with one crisis after another, his nights were spent in the sleep of the truly exhausted.

Everyone he met insisted on commenting how different he looked, how much more grounded and "human." Each day he and the brats survived felt like a victory. He was too busy to brood or long for something he could never have. He didn't have time to spend on searching for a way to attain the unattainable. He hadn't had a nightmare in months.

His days were waking nightmares, Orochimaru insisted.

But somehow, it felt like he had finally begun to live.

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A/N: Bonus points if you know what "17 Moments of Spring" is.

Misogi Zenku: It's like Izanagi, but the Uzumaki/Senju version (?). Misogi is a kind of purification ritual, usually involving bathing. Zenku means "whole body."

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