See the sun

It took her a few days to sort things out after Red John's death.

The inquiry just seemed endless. All the members of her team had to give statements, then they were interrogated over and over again. Not to mention the stack of paperwork she had to deal with.

When it was finally over, first thing she did was jumping into her car and heading towards Malibu.

Who'd have guessed that – among the five of them – Rigsby would be the one to rid the world of the infamous serial killer. Just in the nick of time before he cut Jane's throat, by the way.

Jane hadn't even thanked him. He had vanished shortly after the shooting as a matter of fact.

Lisbon was more than worried about him.

After the tiring seven-hour drive, she was finally in front of his house. Drawing a deep breath, she walked in.

The house was silent and dark. She tiptoed upstairs – half afraid of stirring the ghosts that still lingered there.

Jane was exactly where she supposed he would be. Lying on the mattress just below the ominous red smiley.

"Patrick?", she called tentatively.

He kept on staring into space, as if he hadn't even registered her presence.

Lisbon took in his disheveled appearance – unshaven, his hair tousled and his eyes puffy from crying.

She kneeled beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Patrick, please say something".

Again, she got no reaction at all. He just had the same suffering look of a wounded beast – and she felt completely helpless, not knowing what she could do to ease his pain.

Stifling a sob, she tried to offer him some comfort by gently rubbing his arm.

"I'm so sorry for all you've been through. But it's over now. Red John is dead. You have to let the past go".

He barely shifted his head, looking right through her as if she was actually made of thin air.

"You can't bring Angela and Charlotte back to life. No one can. I would, if I only could – believe me. I'd give my own life in exchange for theirs, if that was enough".

She paused a moment in order to wipe away her tears.

"Jane, I understand if you don't want to talk to me. It's fine. I'll call Sophie Miller, or anybody else you'd rather see right now. But I'm not going to leave you here a minute longer".

Eventually a single word passed through his lips. "Why?"

His voice came out dull and low, as if he was still miles away from her.

"This isn't good for you. You'd go crazy if you stay here brooding over what happened ten years ago".

"Not too bad a thing, maybe".

This matter-of-fact reply made her shiver. She couldn't let him go down like this. She just couldn't.

"They wouldn't want you to lose your sanity, Jane".

"How can you tell that?"

"Because they loved you! Just like… oh, never mind".

She stopped just in time – before she said something she was going to regret.

However, the words like I do seemed to hang in the air. And – for the first time – Jane's gaze focused on her.

"You cannot save me this time, Lisbon".

Yet she could see something different in his eyes now. A fleeting glimpse of hope, maybe.

She was quick to take advantage of it.

"I will save you – or I'll go down with you. No way out of it now".

He actually smiled at this – a watery, uncertain smile, but a smile nonetheless.

"Always as stubborn as a mule, aren't you?"

"Yeah", she confirmed softly, before pulling him into a tight embrace.

Unexpectedly, he relaxed in her arms. He felt safe there. Safe from all the voices that haunted his mind.

"Don't let me go, Teresa", he whispered – his voice trembling as if he was going to cry. "Never let me go".

"I won't. I promise".