So...I wrote this literally years ago as an April Fool's joke, forgot to post it for somewhere around a year, posted it on my Tumblr, and then realized two years later I never posted it here.

Welp...better late than never! Enjoy this old joke AU of the first chapter of IHHS! Also, just in case you don't know, I made an animatic covering IHHS! You can find it on vimeo, and the title is "Screams and Songs". Just Google "Rift-Raft Screams and Songs" and you should find it!

I hope you all have a lovely day!

Well…that didn't exactly go as…planned…

I was surrounded by dozens of angry humans, still sore from crash-landing into the human nest and performing a spell of such potency that only a Shadow-Blender could hope to succeed. Despite it all, I couldn't help but stand back and…admire?…my work.

I had expected my spell to transform the human that had shot me down into a Shadow-Blender like myself.

A Shadow-Blender he was—and judging by his screams, it had been just as excruciating as I had hoped.

What he wasn't, however, was the proper age.

He let out a high-pitched groan, fluttering under-developed wings. He pawed at his face with claws smaller than my teeth.

I had no younger siblings, but just from looking at him, I knew that his form was that of a Shadow-Blender hatchling. His small, near-translucent wings were a clear indication that his body wasn't even that of a fledgling, which could at least fly.

I'd never imagined that he could be so…little…

It doesn't matter! I told myself, furious at myself for feeling pity for a disgusting human. I want him to suffer, and suffer he will!

He gave a weak mew, and every nurturing instinct within me awoke at once, demanding that I take him up by his scruff and care for him.

I snorted, taking a step back. The humans surrounding me flinched away. A smirk rose to my lips.

It vanished the moment the transformed human opened his eyes, just a little too big for his face. He craned his neck, fixated on his body, and gave a frightened, high-pitched squeak.

Protect him! He is but a child! part of me commanded.

"No!" I hissed, more to myself than anything. With a jolt, I realized I'd assumed a battle-ready position, leaning closer to him as if to protect him in my shadow.

The humans began to advance. He would make easy prey to them—and so would I, if I lingered any longer.

I twisted round and abandoned him there, sprinting as though I could outrun the ember of shame flickering in my heart.

I found the dumb thing huddled underneath some upturned tree roots, sobbing his little heart out.

I supposed that I could give him credit for the hiding spot—his scales were the same color as the pine and mud he was lying in, and I would have walked right past him had I not heard his pathetic cries and tracked his fear-scent.

Pinning my ears and wings, I dropped into a crouch and stalked towards him. He took no notice, too caught up in his own self-pity.

I wrinkled my nose at him. Because of him, my tailtip-fin was ripped to pieces. Because of him, I could no longer fly. Because of him, I was trapped on an island full of irrational, furious, terror-fueled humans.

The human huddled up tighter and quieted, apparently done with the pity party. He continued to tremble as if he'd been thrown in cold, deep waters.

Well, might as well put him out of his misery.

His ears shot up at the rising hiss of my fire. Wide eyes darted to and fro and met mine. I had a moment to savor the fear in his eyes and grin, and then I let loose my fire.

"Wait—aah!" he cried, leaping from his secluded spot. My fire just barely missed him, and the updraft caught his little wings and filled them to their fullest extent. He sailed right towards me, shrieking all the while, and landed with an undignified plop right in front of me.

I sat down, lifted my chin, and wrapped my tail tidily around my paws.

"I cannot believe something as dishonorable as you took me down," I growled.

The human balked up at me with his enormous eyes. He looked just like a frightened hatchling—probably because he was one, at least in body.

He is still human, I scolded myself. He is not some lost, helpless hatchling.

"Y-you…" he said, his voice high and young. He tried to scramble to his feet, but as most Shadow-Blender hatchlings were, his paws were just a little too big for him. He fell flat on his face, his wings sprawled out and tail crooked.

I merely lifted an eyebrow. "Yes, me." A sly grin grew across my face, and I leaned down to his eye level. "Tell me, are you enjoying your new body?"

He pinned himself against the ground, wings and tail drawn in, and gave the tiniest little hiss I've ever seen from a hatchling. I threw my head back and laughed.

"I don't…how did…why?" the human gasped. He managed to climb to his feet, raising him up a terrifying foot or so tall. "Why did you do this?"

I pretended to be deep in thought, tipping my head and twitching my tail. His blinked down at it and his pupils widened.

"Well," I hummed, "it seems you are too stupid to figure it out yourself, so I suppose I'll have to break it down for you before I kill you. Firstly—"

The human went into a hunting-crouch, wiggled his rump, and leaped for my tail, pine-needle claws stretched wide.

I jolted, raising my claws so that I could crush him to the ground before he tore off what was left of my tailtip-fin.

Yet just as I was about to slam my paw down onto his skull, a small part of me screamed to stop—and for good reason. I blinked, slowly lowering my leg and absentmindedly taking note that the human's head was scarcely bigger than it. More importantly, I finally processed that he had willingly put himself in my striking range.

He batted at my tailtip-fin with his paw, tail swinging behind him and wings flapping unevenly in excitement. I dragged my tail across the ground. He scampered after it like any other hatchling, albeit much more clumsily.

He's just like a hatchling…? I mused to myself. Did my spell affect him mentally as well?

The human pounced onto my tail and gummed at it. With an angry snort, I flicked it—hard. He gave a surprised yip and stumbled off.

"Ugh," the human groaned, rolling back to his feet and standing up on trembling legs. "What did—did I really…?" His eyes widened, and he cast an almost guilty glance over at my tail.

"Did the wittle human want to play?" I cooed at him.

He narrowed his eyes and pinned his ears, but even then, he did a very poor job at hiding his dismay. Fear-scent still hung strong around him. "What did you do to me?!" the human cried. "What, changing me into—into a Night Fury wasn't enough? You just had to go and mess around with my head, too?"

I shrugged. "I think it suits you. Just like hatchlings, you are very incompetent."

The human growled—or, at least, he tried to. It was simply too high-pitched and squeaky and young to carry any semblance of a threat.

"Aww," I said sympathetically. "That's cute."

His eyes lit with fire. He scraped a paw across the ground, but his claws were too small and soft to leave any mark behind. With a confused, distraught yowl, the human charged.

I raised an eyebrow and waggled my tailtip-fin at him.

A small laugh escaped me when he tumbled after my tail, all worries forgotten. He really was like a hatchling! Not exactly my intentions, but I wasn't going to complain.

With a small huff, I rose to my feet and spun in a slow circle, dragging my tail across the ground just like my older brother used to. The human couldn't seem to make up his mind, dropping into a stalk and then bouncing after it, only to crouch low to the ground again and then break his form to charge. His eyes were locked on my tail and he was even chirping a few hunting-calls.

A warmth rose within me, watching him scamper after my tail just as I used to when I had been that age. I had been so small and naïve at the time, so excited to see the world that I never stopped pestering my parents and brother about it.

The human managed to catch my tail and held on tight, grabbing one of the joints in a weak, toothless grip.

My smile fell.

I stared at him with pinned ears, still as stone. He let go, took a swing at my tailfin, lost his balance, and fell backwards with a squawk.

He really is like a hatchling, I thought. A strange dread filled me as the full implications of the discovery dawned on me.

Take care of him, part of me said.

He was still a human, though—that much was clear. He could survive on his own.

He will be preyed upon by nightfall.

With a soft growl, I tried to shake my head to rid myself of the intrusive thoughts. I wanted him dead! That was the whole point! If that meant that a passing hawk would make an easy meal of him, then so be it!

What would your brother think?

Memories swarmed into the present. Dread sunk my heart. I shuddered.

Gods damn him.

I had to take care of him, didn't I?