Summary: Once upon a time, there was an evil king that tried to take over the kingdom of Lima. This is the story of the fair maiden who wouldn't let his schemes get in the way of her royal destiny and the pirates that helped her along the way.

Pairings: Finnchel, Tike, Samtana, possible future Puckleberry with some suggested Seblaine and Kurtofsky

Warnings: Despite what this section may have said before, this is in no way shape or form canon. This story does not contain any spoilers because it's a total A/U with only the barest hints of canon.

Disclaimer: I don't own this show or anything related to this show. If I did I assure you I wouldn't be writing stories about them. I would be fixing the hot mess they're making of certain characters!

Author's Note: As I mentioned in the Author's Note of another story, this is the fairytale story I've been working on. I've still got another few chapters to write out but I'm pretty much done with this story. So I figured I'd post it and see if anyone out there thinks it's worth finishing up. Hope you all enjoy!

Good Pirates Aren't So Hard to Find

Once upon a time, in a land not so very different from the one we know now, there was a thriving, prosperous kingdom known as Carmel. The land was ruled by a handsome King and his beloved Queen. The people of Carmel adored their benevolent rulers for establishing a monarchy based on peace and diplomacy. They ruled for almost ten years without a single drop of blood being spilled in the name of Carmel. The kingdom flourished and the people had so many reasons to celebrate. But there was no celebration more spectacular than the one held to honor the birth of the heir to the throne. The King and Queen had their successor and the townspeople had another royal to honor and love. Life in the small kingdom was perfect.

But the peace was not meant to last. In a single night, the once peaceful and happy Carmel was pillaged and all but destroyed. Through the years, the knights grew complacent due to the lack of battle. They were unprepared for the brutal, savage and power hungry pirates led by Dustin the Black. He, with the aid of his lover, a woman from the village, attacked the kingdom, slaughtering those that chose to oppose him. Dustin's cruelty knew no limits. He murdered the entire royal family, including the newborn prince. Less than a year after they celebrated his birth, the townspeople gathered in secret to mourn his loss.

Dustin named himself supreme ruler of the land. The local woman that helped him became his Queen. Their son, who though young displayed the same ruthless tendencies of his father, was named prince of the land. With that the once great kingdom of Carmel fell to ruin. The people were starving and angry. But despite their troubles, no one forgot their former monarchs or the happy lives they once enjoyed. There were whispers of uprisings within the kingdom. Rebellions were started. Dustin's army was more alert than those of the former king and queen but it was becoming clear that Dustin's rule would soon no longer be tolerated. The rebellion was growing stronger every day. It would only be a manner of time before the seeds of mistrust and resentment grew into an actual threat. He knew it was time to set his sights on a new land to conquer, to strengthen his rule and remind his citizens that he was in charge. So he set his sights on the peaceful neighboring kingdom of Lima, ruled by King Burt, his beautiful Queen Carole and their two sons, Princes Kurt and Finn.

Now this is where our story truly begins. This is the story of how the evil King Dustin tried to conquer the land of Lima. It's mostly the story of the driven young maiden who wouldn't let her dreams of being the Queen of Lima be stopped by said evil king. It's a tale full of romance, misfit pirates, seers and an occasional song. Our story opens on a quiet, beautiful, sunny afternoon in the kingdom of Lima…..

"Lady Rachel!"

Rachel suppressed the very un-lady like urge to scream as the dreaded voice grew nearer. She curled her body into a tighter position, hoping against hope that the one searching for her would simply walk away. But luck was not on her side. The curtains she was hiding behind were suddenly wrenched open revealing Tina, one of the two handmaidens assigned to her. The girl huffed and placed her hands on her hips looking down at her charge.

"Lady Rachel, we've been looking all over for you."

"Yes, I've heard," Rachel replied, dryly. "Congratulations, you've found me. So what is it this time, Tina? A dress fitting? Etiquette lessons? History lessons? Balancing an apple on the tip of my nose lessons?"

"Actually," Tina smiled slightly at her questions. "His Highness, Prince Finn, is requesting an audience with you."

Rachel's eyes widened and a smile curved her lips. Since she was chosen to be the prince's bride, her time with her future spouse was limited. When they were together, they rarely spoke. She talked to him about her dreams but it seemed that he was a million miles away. Despite being engaged for nearly three months, Rachel felt like she barely knew him and that just didn't seem right. She wasn't sure how a real marriage was supposed to work but she was fairly certain that one needed to spend a fair amount of time together. Then again, she really didn't have a solid basis for this theory as her parents were a dreadful comparison and pretty much the opposite of what she wanted out of life. They barely tolerated one another on good days and on bad days, she'd be lucky if she was able to repeat the insults they hurled at one another without making even the most inappropriate of sailors blush furiously.

"I didn't know he was back. I thought he was still away at sea."

"He must've come back when you were at your balancing an apple on the tip of your nose lesson," Tina teased. "Mercedes just informed me that he asked to meet with you."

"Do you know why he wants to meet with me?"

"Maybe he just missed his beautiful bride to be after three weeks at sea," Tina grinned. Rachel found herself smiling as well. She never had many friends as a child. And though she knew Tina and Mercedes were considered servants, Rachel couldn't help but look at the two women as friends, especially Tina. After all, they also knew what it was like to grow up without the money and privilege granted to the royal family.

Rachel climbed to her feet quickly. "How do I look?"

Tina brushed a piece of lint off her dress and smoothed back Rachel's unruly locks. "You look like a princess and someone I would be proud to call my queen."

Rachel impulsively hugged the maid. "Thank you, Tina. I have no idea what I would do without you here to keep me sane."

"You worry too much, Lady Rachel," Tina assured her. "Prince Finn will love you as much as we all do, if not more."

She smiled again and gave her friend one final hug. "Wish me luck."

"You don't need it. You're going to be fine."

Rachel nodded before heading out of her chambers in search of her future spouse. She had been living in the palace for the past three months and this was one of a handful of occasions where she would be spending time with the prince. Since she was a child, she knew she was destined to fall in love with a prince. When her mother was barely a month into her pregnancy with Rachel, she was approached by an old gypsy woman. The gypsy told the Lady Shelby that her daughter would grow to be beautiful, smart and talented. And more over, she would fall in love with a handsome and noble prince who would love her more than the sun and the stars. She would be his queen and they would have a love that would be told in stories for generations.

Rachel held onto this story because she needed it to be true. Her parents did not have the most… functional relationship. Her mother was born to a wealthy family that lost their fortune after Shelby's father was killed in a war. She was married to Hiram Berry in hopes that the marriage would help them to recoup their fortune. It did not. There was no love in the marriage between Shelby and Hiram. Shelby longed for a life as more than just a wife, and soon a mother and Hiram longed for more than just a wife. Rachel knew she was loved to an extent but she would never be either of her parents' priority. She would never be the reason they woke up in the morning or lived. And she wanted that more than anything in the world.

At any rate, Rachel grew up knowing this future and instead of buckling under the crushing weight of knowing she was destined for royalty, Rachel wore her mantle high and carried herself in a royal manner in her daily life. She wasn't very bothered by the fact that she did not actually know a prince. She was sure that when the time came, the prince would reveal himself. She would await his revelation. And she did until a month after her seventeenth birthday when she very literally ran into his Royal Highness, Prince Finn. It was love at first sight. She knew when she met him that he was her future. He had to be at any rate. She definitely wasn't going to any other kingdoms to find a prince. Besides the closest kingdom to Lima was Carmel and she heard about the prince of Carmel. Everyone heard the stories about Prince Jesse and how his father came into power. That was definitely not a road she wanted to travel down. Ever.

So she did everything in her power to be noticed by the handsome prince of Lima. She had strong competition from some of the wealthier and better connected women in the town but Rachel had persistence and dogged determination on her side. Not to mention, some rather low connections and very little moral compunctions about sending the competition to dangerous locations. She was sure that one day she would feel bad about the steps she took to get rid of the foreign princess who was almost as talented and beautiful as her. But that day wasn't today. It most likely wouldn't be any day soon either. Rachel was driven and determined to make sure that the prophecy of her life came true. She knew that her love for Finn would be the story of ages. She just had to get him on board with this plan.

From what she understood of love (again, her parents were not suitable examples of this), there was a feeling almost akin to butterflies in your stomach when you saw your special someone. While the prince was handsome, noble and sweet, she just didn't feel butterflies. She wondered if he felt them for her. She wondered if she was his sun and stars. Or would those feelings grow over time? A small part of her wondered if she was supposed to love someone else but forcing herself to love Finn because she wanted to fit a certain role. But she promptly pushed that thought out of her mind. That was just ridiculous. She was supposed to be with Finn and that was that.

"You're late."

Rachel stopped short, unaware that she had arrived at her destination. Though she hadn't spent a large amount of time with her fiancée, she was reasonably sure that the man seated in the center of the room was not Finn. She eyed him critically before meeting his steady gaze. The blue eyes of the King stared back at her and she realized that she was looking at Prince Kurt. She had even fewer interactions with the prince but she was assured by all those that met him that he was a bit different than his brother. The rumor was that he preferred to lie in the company of men and not women. Rachel didn't care much about that. The family's doctor was gay as well and he was a lovely man. Her father spent a lot of time with him and they were friends. Wait…. She forced herself away from that particular topic, shelving it for another day and focused on the prince in front of her.

"I wasn't aware that I was supposed to be meeting with you, your highness," Rachel curtseyed, falling back on her manners. "I apologize for my tardiness."

"Yes, well," Kurt sniffed dismissively. "I apologize for deceiving you, Lady Rachel. I just wanted to meet the woman who was marrying my brother."

Rachel tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. She didn't know the princes were close. This should've been in her research. She always had the impression that Kurt thought his slightly older stepbrother was foolish. But perhaps she was mistaken as he was clearly concerned about his brother's welfare.

"It is an honor to meet you, your highness."

"Come now, have a seat. Let's chat," he motioned towards the chair across the table from him. She sat down, wondering where this conversation was headed. "Now, Lady Rachel, your father is a lawyer and your mother is a former courtesan."

"Yes, that is correct."

"And I've heard that you have no royal blood."

"None, your highness."

"I also heard that you believe that there is a prophecy saying that you would marry a prince and have some epic love story."

Rachel felt her cheeks flush. She had a good idea who told him that story as there were only two people aside from her parents that knew the tale. She made a mental note never to say another word around Mercedes. She knew Tina wouldn't spill a word to anyone. She had the most adorable stutter when she was face to face with any of the royals. So it was definitely Mercedes. Rachel was going to kill her one of these days. She forced herself back in the moment as she realized the prince was still staring. Kurt's eyes assessed her carefully and with enough scrutiny to make her feel even more insignificant than she already did.

"So I have to ask, Lady Rachel," Kurt said, leaning forward resting his head on his hands. "How much do you really love my brother?"

"If you're implying that I'm only marrying your brother for a story, then you're mistaken," Rachel replied, forgetting momentarily that she was still speaking to the prince of the land. "I know that I haven't spent much time with your brother but in the time that we have spent together I've seen that he has a good heart. He's kind. He's gentle. He will make an amazing king, almost as good as your father before him. That is why I love him."

Kurt sat back in his seat with a thoughtful expression on his face. "Well," he said finally. "That was a good answer."

"Do I pass your test, your majesty?" she could hardly help the bitter edge in her voice. Kurt smiled brightly.

"Yes, I suppose you do. Although I do wonder what a girl like you is doing marrying an oaf like my brother."

"But I thought…"

"I love Finn," Kurt corrected. "He's my brother, so I suppose I'm obligated to love him. But I'm also aware of his great many flaws. You're different than all of the others girls that toss themselves in his direction. You're capable of counting past five without using two hands at the very least. You have a personality. I don't want to see that diminished."

Rachel blinked. That was definitely not where she saw this conversation going. She smoothed her hair back carefully. "I thank you for your concern, your Majesty, but I don't believe it will be necessary."

Kurt smiled tightly. "I suppose it won't, since you're destined to have an epic love story and all."

Rachel resisted the urge to roll her eyes. It wouldn't do for to insult her future brother-in-law. She already worried about her impending wedding to the prince. She didn't need to have bludgeoning his brother being held against her. No, she was a patient girl. She could definitely wait until after the wedding for that to happen.

"If your Majesty has no further need for me, I will excuse myself now," she said, with an exaggerated air of formality. She rose from her seat as Kurt nodded his permission. She was halfway out the door when he called her name.

"Sometimes we only see what we want to see," he spoke almost in a whisper. "After my mother died, my father did his best to raise me…. to try to understand me. He tried to ignore the things about me that made me different. But now he accepts me for who I am. True, Finn will be the one to inherit the throne but it's nice knowing that my father still loves me."

Rachel's aggressive stance softened as she looked back at the prince. "That must be a nice feeling."

"It is," Kurt mustered a smile. "But I didn't tell you that to gain your pity, Rachel. I need you to know that true love, whether it's with a parent or a husband, means accepting a person for who they really are. It means you don't have to change yourself to fit into some preconceived notion or destiny."

"I thank you for your advice and for sharing that information with me," Rachel replied, formally. "I will keep that in mind."

Kurt opened his mouth to respond but a loud commotion coming from the main hall caught both their attention. Without even realizing it, Rachel was racing down the narrow corridors of the castle with a heavy feeling growing in her stomach. Her feet led her straight to where a crowd was gathered around a beaten down night. With the heavy feeling increasing, Rachel recognized him as David, one of the knights assigned to protect the prince while they were on a diplomatic mission.

"David," the queen started as she swept into the room, followed closely by her husband. "What's happened? Where is Finn?"

The knight kneeled down, though the act was clearly causing him pain. Rachel stepped forward to help him to his feet, surprised when Kurt did the same, though his touch lingered longer on the knight than was really necessary. The knight did not seem to mind. Interesting... She noticed that Carole's appraising eye landed on her briefly before turning back to David.

"Your highness, I am so sorry," he grunted, visibly riding out a wave of pain. "A few days ago we were on our way back to the castle when we were overtaken by pirates, or who we thought were pirates. We knew it was our mission to protect the prince at all costs. Most of the knights were killed before we were finally overcome and taken aboard their ship."

Carole's eyes filled with tears as Burt pulled her into an embrace. His eyes were kind as he looked at his injured knight. "Please continue, David."

"Yes, my lord. Once on their ship we were transported to the kingdom of Carmel and met with King Dustin. He killed all but me and Prince Finn. He sent me back to deliver a message."

"And what would be the message?"

"That you are to surrender control over the kingdom to Dustin by next month or he will send the prince home…. in pieces."

There was a horrified gasp from within the crowd and the queen broke down sobbing. Rachel saw the life and dreams that she had fall apart in that very moment.

"David," Burt's voice cut through her thoughts. "How serious do you think Dustin is about his claims? Do you really think he intends to harm Finn if we don't surrender the kingdom to him?"

David's dark eyes flashed briefly. Rachel didn't want to imagine the thoughts that were playing on repeat in his mind. "My family was originally from Carmel. My mother was able to leave with my brothers and myself when Dustin laid siege to the land. My father did not make it. Dustin was unrelenting in his attacks. He is solely responsible for wiping out the entire true royal family of Carmel, my lord. Including a barely two month old infant son. Dustin doesn't know the meaning of mercy. He slaughtered my entire unit without a single moment of hesitation, my lord. He means what he threatens. He will kill the prince if we do not surrender."

Burt sighed heavily. "I hate to admit this but you're right. I don't think we have a choice in the matter. How long will it take to send a messenger to Carmel to tell them of our decision?"

"Wait, what?" Rachel blurted without thinking. She was suddenly the center of attention. "I apologize, your highness."

"No," Carole shook her head. "I want to hear what you have to say on the matter, Lady Rachel. While he may be our son, he is also your future husband. I believe you should have an opportunity to voice your opinion on the matter."

Rachel nodded, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "I suppose that what I was trying to ask is…. Why would you even consider listening with him? I understand that he killed people but he faced a handful of guards. You still have at least thirty able bodied soldiers that are capable of fighting for the honor of the kingdom. You cannot seriously be considering surrendering the kingdom."

"Yes, Lady Rachel, I can," Burt retorted. "Finn may not be my son by birth but he is truly my son and the heir to this kingdom. I would do anything to keep him and the people of this kingdom safe. You were probably only a small child when Carmel was all but destroyed but I remember it very clearly. I cannot allow that to happen to Lima."

"But it will happen to Lima if you surrender to Dustin," Rachel returned, sharply. "You say that the prince is your heir but what good is it being his heir if you've surrendered his birthright to someone else?"

"Are you worried about losing your right to be Queen?" Kurt asked. His voice was like ice and Rachel felt his piercing gaze boring holes into her head. She really couldn't wait until she and Finn were married so she could really let the younger prince know exactly what she though of him. But for now….

"This has nothing to do with me!" she protested. "This has everything to do with Lima! You're saying that you're going to surrender? I do know what Carmel was like. My mother was from there as well. She told me stories of how Carmel used to be. I don't want to be telling my children stories of how Lima used to be!" she shook her head. "Your Highness, you have an army. You should be fighting against Dustin, not backing down to his demands."

"He is our son," Carole said, simply. "His safety means everything to us."

There was nothing left to say. If she continued to argue against their plan then Kurt would probably feel pressed to tell them about her ridiculous story. And while she was partially this upset because, yes, it would mean giving up a goal she had for her entire life, she was also upset because she loved Lima. She remembered the wistful tone in her mother's voice when she would tell her about Carmel. It was a land that cherished the arts and music. Her mother told her how they would have competitions just for singing. There wouldn't be a point to any of these competitions, they were only for fun. And it was fun. She didn't want the same sorry fate to befall Lima. But it seemed that she was in the minority on that.

"I apologize for my outburst," Rachel bowed, slightly. "It won't happen again. Now if you'll excuse me. I believe I have a history lesson to attend." She spun on her heels and walked briskly away from the main hall.

"I know I don't have years of fancy education behind me, but I'm reasonably sure that this is not your history lesson."

Rachel was startled from her tumultuous thoughts at the sound of the almost musical voice. She glanced up to see Tina standing over her. Wordlessly, she shifted over, silently inviting the maid to sit beside her. Following her unsuccessful plea to the king and queen, Rachel stormed out of the castle and towards the beach. The fondest memories of her childhood (and they were few and far between) were had right here on this very beach. The family picnics were the rare times she witnessed her parents getting along. In those moments, it was almost as if they actually liked one another. As she grew older, the beach became her special place to hide away from the toxicity of her parents' failing marriage.

"Are you alright, Lady Rachel?"

"I suppose you should call me Rachel as I am not likely to be marrying Prince Finn any time soon. Not if his parents or brother have anything to say about it."

Tina leaned into her shoulder. "I wouldn't worry about that. You're worried about the prince but I know you're also worried about the kingdom. Those are very admirable qualities in a queen."

Rachel felt a smile tugging at her lips. "Anyone ever tell you that you're really smart? Why are you wasting all your potential changing sheets for the royal family?"

"Well, it wasn't always my dream to be a maid," Tina smiled sadly. "I actually dreamed of being a chef. My family owned a bakery. But unfortunately two years ago my parents were killed in a fire at the bakery. I managed to escape but I lost everything in the process. My home, my family and any means of making a living. I needed to make money to survive and short of becoming a pirate, this was the easiest way. Although, in retrospect, being a pirate seems way more fun."

Rachel giggled before the events of earlier came crashing back bringing a wave of melancholia. "The knights are scared."

"Well, the siege on Carmel was very scary," Tina pointed out. "The man killed a baby. Actually, I heard he forced his son to do it, but the point is that the guy had a baby murdered. It's a shame too. Supposedly everyone loved the little prince too. Rumor has it that women were actively trying to get pregnant so that they could have their children marry the prince. And not just because he was gorgeous. There were stories about him too. He was supposed to be a great hero one day. The people there still sing songs about him."

"Oh, so he had a prophecy too," Rachel rolled her eyes. "I'm starting to think those things are just a joke. He died when he was less than a year old, so he was hardly a hero. And I'm going to marry the former prince of Lima. Of course, that's if his parents allow the marriage after that scene back there. Most likely not. Also we're assuming that Dustin doesn't just kill him before they manage to relay the message of surrender."

"We're in the dark place," Tina murmured to no one in particular. "Lady… Rachel, I don't want you to beat yourself down. I believe in our town. Lima is too great to fall to the hands of Dustin. Somehow we will overcome this. We will get Prince Finn back and you'll get married and have lots of fat, happy babies."

Rachel smiled reluctantly. "Maybe. But not if the knights are too scared to fight against him. And they are. They'll never go against Dustin."

"We need pirates."

Rachel gave the maid a look out the corner of her eye. "Are you reliving your daydream again?"

"No, hear me out. The knights are too scared to fight against Dustin because he's a former pirate (still kind of is) and he's used to be all bloodthirsty, evil and grr. What we need is a group of pirates to fight against those pirates!"

"Because there are just random groups of pirates lounging about the beach waiting to offer their services to the kingdom?"

She meant that to be sarcastic, she honestly did. But during the lull in their conversation, almost as if on cue, Rachel heard the faint sounds of a scuffle followed by loud laughter. She and Tina exchanged hesitant looks before creeping in the direction the sounds were coming from. There was a group of three young men standing together. Their attention was not on the two girls who were slowly approaching them but rather on the two people fighting in the middle of their semi circle. Rachel stopped in her tracks as she watched the pair almost move around one another fluidly with their swords.

"It's almost like a dance," Tina whispered in awe. Rachel nodded in response, too caught up in their movements to comment aloud. After a few minutes of continued attacks with little results, the two abandoned their swords and resorted to less than ethical attacks. Rachel couldn't help the smile that formed when she saw the taller of the fighters fall, pinned to the sand by the full body weight of his foe.

"Say 'uncle'," the clear victor of the match crowed.

"Never!" Fingers danced up his sides, producing laughter. He squirmed away from the touch but the person held on tighter. "Ok! Ok! Uncle!"

"Ha! I win!"

But the victory was short lived. In a move that she had never seen before, the former loser lurched upwards with his hips throwing his opponent off of him, sending them crashing to the ground beside him. By the time the fallen combatant recovered, the young man was back on his feet, smirking. Even from where they stood, Rachel could make out the laughing hazel eyes that gazed down triumphantly at their friend.

"You were saying?"

"Puck! You cheated, you bastard!"

"Is that what you're going to tell someone who tries to kill you for real?" the man apparently known as Puck asked, smugly.

There was a round of applause and all eyes were flickering slightly to their left at a slightly older man. His curly sandy brown hair glinted in the setting sunlight as he crossed the beach to stand beside the gloating young man.

"Well done, Puck. I see you're finally taking all those lessons about fighting dirty to heart."

"Yeah, well once you eat dirt enough, you get the hint," he shrugged. "Isn't that right, Sam? Oh, wait, that's a lesson you have yet to learn as you eat dirt during every training session."

A blonde in the crowd flipped him the finger looking down at the figure still sprawled across the sandy ground. "You ok, San?"

"Yeah, just hurt my ass and my pride," the short lived winner lamented, rising to their feet. It was then that Rachel noticed the hat had fallen off during their skirmish revealing long black hair. Rachel felt her jaw drop as she realized that the young man was actually a woman. "So basically I'm just you yesterday."

Sam rolled his eyes, grumbling good naturedly. "That's hardly fair. I was up against both of you. I've yet to meet anyone that can best either one of you."

"My uncle insisted upon the finest education growing up," Puck grinned. "The finest physical education at any rate. I'm pretty sure I could kill you with a bobby pin."

"I know I can," Santana said, smiling in his direction.

Rachel suppressed the involuntary squeak that almost escaped when she felt Tina insistently tugging on the sleeve of her dress. "What?" she hissed. Tina held a finger up against her lips, pulling Rachel further down the beach. "What's gotten into you?"

"They're pirates!"

"Thank you for stating the obvious, Tina. I noticed that already!" Rachel snapped. "But they're foolish to go this far inland. Lima has very strict piracy laws."

Lady... Rachel, don't you get it? They're pirates. You saw how they fought. They're good. Maybe we could ask them to help us save the prince!"

Rachel chewed on her lip hesitantly. On the one hand, the plan was completely insane. To even consider asking a pirate for assistance was pretty much in line with treason. Pirates were absolutely forbidden in Lima. But on the other hand, they were excellent fighters and they didn't seem to be the type that scared easily. If she could convince them to help her, she was confident that they could definitely free the prince with little effort.

"Fine, let's try," she finally replied aloud, though Tina had been watching her facial reactions and knew when she came to a decision. She let out a happy squeal before dragging her back to where they saw the pirates. Rachel realized that they were better than they originally thought when they found themselves staring down six separate swords. The female pirate was toying with the end of a braided strand of her hair which had several decorations, one of which was a razor blade. Scary. "Hi?"

Puck rolled his eyes, looking over to the older man that praised him earlier. "I'm pretty sure they're harmless."

"Santana looks harmless. She damn near killed a man with her hair tie the other day," a bespectacled man that looked more at home in a library than carrying a sword commented idly. Still there was a cool determination in the blue eyes that stared back at her and Tina. Though he was steady, Rachel noticed that one leg trembled and he seemed to be placing more weight on the more stable leg. "And that was because he wouldn't give her extra ale."

"I like my ale," Santana shrugged.

For the first time in her life, Rachel was afraid. This plan was incredibly stupid. She couldn't believe she let Tina talk her into this one. They were going to die on the beach at the hands of a group of pirates that appeared to be, at best, functionally insane.

The older man cleared his throat, ignoring the sigh of relief that escaped both girls' lips as the swords were lowered in the process. "Now, how can I be of assistance to you?"

Rachel cleared her throat. In for a penny, in for a pound…. "My name is Lady Rachel of Lima. I am soon to be the future Queen of Lima. This is my handmaiden, Tina."

"Bored now," Puck muttered. The older man glared at him. "Whatever. Continue, sweetheart."

"That's Lady Rachel to you, pirate."

"See that's the problem with the upper class," Santana said. Her sword was mysteriously replaced by a large knife that she was casually using to clean her nails. "They assume that just because we're pirates, we're uncivilized."

"You'll have to excuse my crew," the older man spoke up. "They're not normally this bratty. They're actually quite worse." He smiled and Rachel slowly felt herself relax. "My name is Will. I'm the captain of the New Directions ship. This is my crew. My first mate, Sam, and our second mate, Mike."

He gestured towards the blonde and a tall man, around the same age as the majority of the crew. He was thin, obviously of Asian descent and quite clearly Tina's taste in men. Her former maid turned Pirate recruiting best friend forever was very much drooling over him.

"Wait, I thought I was first mate this week."

"No," Sam said, peevishly. "It's so my week. You were first mate last week and the week before. Stop being a first mate hog!"

"Both of you quit it," Puck grunted. "It really doesn't even matter. Neither of you do anything remotely resembling any kind of duty anyway."

"This is true," they murmured in unison. Will gave them a fond look before moving along with the introductions.

"Anyway, this my lieutenant, Santana, and our sailing master, Artie." The latter was now leaning against Mike, rubbing the leg that Rachel noticed earlier. He paused to nod in their direction before working out the cramp in his leg. "And last, but not least, quartermaster and gunner, Puck."

The young man, who she could now see was still a teenager himself, tipped his head in a facsimile of a bow. "To what do we owe the honor of meeting with the future queen of the terribly enlightened kingdom of Lima?"

Rachel was fairly certain he meant that to be insulting but she chose to ignore it. See, she was already demonstrating royal qualities. She was going to be the bigger person. Besides, it probably wouldn't do well to snap back at the people you needed help from that also had the knowledge, capacity and the readily accessible weapons necessary to kill you. "I require your assistance in a very important matter regarding the royal family."

Will nodded thoughtfully. "Not interested," he said, finally. Rachel's jaw dropped.

"But... it's involves Prince Finn! He's been… been kidnapped and the evil doers are requesting that the king surrender the whole kingdom in exchange for the prince's return."

Puck shrugged, stealing Santana's knife and absently twirling it between his fingers. He kept his eyes on her, almost as if he was oblivious to the sharp, dangerous blade dancing over his fingers. "Sounds like they already have a solution to their problem. So what do you need us for?"

"You heard the part about King Burt having to surrender the kingdom?"

"Again, sounds like there is a solution. Why do you need us?"

Rachel growled. "That is not a solution! That's a horrible idea. He's going to give this kingdom to a bunch of pirates."

Puck's eyes flashed and the knife stopped moving. "So your genius idea was to ask a bunch of pirates to help you? I don't know why. Whole thing sounds like a damn good idea to me. Maybe we should've thought about that first, Captain. Especially since the kingdom is apparently full of weaklings. It would've been easy pickings!"

"Puck," Will said in a low voice but the warning there was very clear. The younger man backed off, somewhat, though the knife was twitching in his hand again. "I apologize, Lady Rachel, if you didn't get from this what you wanted but my crew is not exactly in the habit of helping out the royal family. Especially since its Prince Finn that has been the most vocal about his distaste for pirates. He has been pushing for stronger regulations on our movements and a lot more lethal punishments should we be caught. Not exactly inclined to help someone that would rather see our heads displayed on pikes."

Rachel could feel the tears welling in her eyes. She tried to push them back but they wouldn't be ignored. "You have to help. It's not just about the prince. It's also about this kingdom. If it is forfeit, then everything that makes Lima great will be lost."

"We're not even from Lima," Santana replied. "Well, I don't know. Puck, where exactly are you from again?"

Puck's lips twisted as he glanced at Will. The captain patted him on the shoulder. "We're not from Lima either. I'm sorry to hear about troubles, Lady Rachel. I hope that it all works out for you. Ok, guys, I need you….."

"Please!" Rachel interrupted, dropping to her knees. "You don't understand. It's my destiny to marry a prince. A seer told my mother that before I was born and they're rarely ever wrong, so it has to be true. Prince Finn is my fiancée, my destiny! He won't be a prince if they go through with this surrender. That means that I've done a lot of bordering on illegal and definitely immoral things for nothing. And, really, I know that you're not from Lima but you can appreciate the beauty of our land, can't you? Seriously, do pirates appreciate beauty? Probably not based on the average pirate's hygiene habits but I can attest to that fact that Lima is beautiful and amazing. But it won't stay that way if Dustin takes over here too. And he will if you don't help me get back my destiny, I mean, the prince."

She could see the visible change in the captain as she finished her desperate rambling. Will's eyes took a more serious glint than held during the entire exchange. Before this moment, she didn't truly understand how this man was captain to the rather scary looking teenagers. But she got it now. She really did not want to be on the receiving end of that look. "I'm sorry. Did you say, Dustin?"

"Yes," she stammered slightly. "He is the one that took Prince Finn. He is demanding that the king and queen surrender Lima to his custody by the beginning of next month or he will kill the prince."

Will's face darkened before a frosty smile spread across his face. Finally, he turned to his silent crew. "Alright, gang, let's pack it up. Looks like we'll be setting sail sooner than we thought. We're on a mission to save a prince."

"Oh, what the hell?"

"Are you serious?"

"Really?"

"This is going to be interesting. We're so going to die."

All at once the crew began grumbling, but Rachel noticed that they were all still moving forward, after Puck pointedly cleared his throat. Then the crew was gone, even Will was already heading back to the ship. They were all gone except for Puck, his glare and that really big knife. Said knife was clenched tightly in his left fist as he looked at Rachel. She felt a shiver run down her spine, though she wasn't sure if that was solely attributed to fear.

"I get that you want to save your fiancée, or your destiny, or whatever the hell, but I need you to know one thing. This crew is my family. They mean more to me than your prince or the entirety of this stupid kingdom. If something happens to even one of them, I promise you that the things I will do to this town will make Dustin look like a saint in comparison. Do you understand?"

Rachel swallowed, nodding. That answer was apparently enough as he stalked away from them. That feeling just now? She was definitely now feeling all fear. He threw a look over his shoulder at the two women who were still rooted to their places, never pausing in his furious walk. "You coming or what? We set sail in an hour."

Rachel threw Tina a pointed glare. "Still thinking that asking for help from pirates was an awesome idea?"

"A little less," Tina replied, with a shrug. She cocked her head to the side with her eyes riveted on the angry pirate ahead. "Is it wrong that I'm a little turned on right now?"

Rachel wanted to argue with the maid but honestly she kind of saw what Tina found so fascinating about the man. He did have a nice body… especially those arms. They were lovely… and he was a pirate that just threatened to kill him. She shouldn't be finding any part of him lovely. Damn, she was more messed up about the prince than she thought. Yes, that had to be it. Well, that was her story and she was sticking to it.

*The end. No, I'm kidding. I already have most of the second chapter written if anyone is interested in reading it. So I hope you enjoyed. Ciao for now!