Bad-Assery Subject to be Censored

Slight Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or any of its characters

Any character likenesses or ideas to actual persons is completely coincidental and totally and accidentally on purpose ;)

Rated M for language and maybe later lemon… If I can get past the weirdness of writing one.

Title subject to change…possibly not if you guys like it…it purposefully makes no sense but sounds pretty kick-ass, right?

I apologize, again, for taking so long and the false chapter; I just love telling you guys what's up! I will be sure to make up for it with a long (actual) chapter. Enjoy ;)

Rate, Review and Recommend, please :]

Thanks again to all the people who reviewed and favorited and blah blah generic-thank-you-speech blah

Lawl, just kidding, I freaking fainted every time I found out I got a review or someone favorited me, so seriously, thank you! Y'all make my day ;)

Anything with parenthesis on it is the Narrator speaking… ohh she so funny.

CANDYBARS!

Chapter Two: Introductions, Seductions and a Flustered Englishman

Arthur dropped his bags on the floor with a hard thud, releasing a lot of pent up (sexual) frustration. His shoulder was slapped and gripped in a (I guess you could call it) respectful embrace which only added a more annoyed flush to the Brit's face.

"What's the matter, Kirkland?" asked Alfred. "Dude, are you still mad at me for making you spill your tea? Guess I should've warned the passengers of those rough wind thingys." He pondered on the idea.

Clueless, Arthur thought to himself, thankful of Alfred's ignorance.

He was kind of peeved at his tea being spilt, however, even though it did stain his favorite shirt and dampen his copy of "The Importance of Being Earnest," he was more embarrassed at finding out that the blue-eyed-once-colony that he had been day dreaming about was actually flying the plane during the whole flight. He shook the arm off his person.

"I'm not angry, you blooming wanker… just… a bit tired, is all…. from the flight…. But, you do owe me a new book."

Alfred scratched the back of his head, smiled nervously as Arthur looked around the American mansion. It almost reminded the Englishman of his own, minus the multiple mounted guitars, stuffed wild cats and other rock and roll idyllic things about the home. Arthur came back to where his bags were perched, but just before he could grab the first's handle, Alfred stopped him.

"Wait!" he startled Arthur with his cry. "Wait, wait, wait. You think just because I'm amazingly carefree that I don't know hospitality. Well by thinking that, you know me so freaking well, so it's a good thing I have someone who does."

Alfred yelled an odd cat-call, "Yeee-haw!"

And with that a tall man with a masculine figure that made the Brit's knees quake, walked into the room and grabbed the handle of one of Arthur's bags.

As the mystery man led Arthur down the hall to his room, England couldn't help but soak in the dark brown eyes and the masculine strip of peach fuzz under the MM's bottom lip. The damp ring around his closely cut, mousey, brown hair suggested he'd been wearing some sort of hat and could see from his glazed arms along with his moistened neck, that this man had been outside working in the heat, but with what, he couldn't quite place. A light bulb flashed behind his eyes in realization. It could've been the blue jeans or the worn working boots but, the Englishman concluded that the belt buckle truly gave the mystery man away.

(Oh GOD! Let's hope this isn't another Tara!... that, for some random reason, writes a WHOLE lot better… fingers crossed.)

The man stopped in front what Alfred decided was his assigned guest room and opened the door.

"So… I know you're supposed to be a gentleman and all, but you could at least act like you remember me." Arthur was taken aback at the mystery man's statement.

"Uh.. uh… well, you see… I… uh-" Arthur stuttered, trying to remember the man's bloody NAME!

"Austin, Mr. Kirkland… Austin Smith? I represented the Republic of Texas at one time…?" Austin searched for a reply in the Brit's face.

"RIGHT!" Arthur shouted. He cleared his throat, realizing his outburst, "Ahem, yes, well, you look awfully different seeing as the last we spoke, your hair was blonde-"

"That's only for football season… Don't ask." Austin shrugged. "It really was nice seein' you again, Mr. Kirkland." If Arthur hadn't a crush on Alfred, he would swoon even harder at the Texan's dark, southern voice.

Austin smiled and then motioned to the room's doorway, "This is your room, it's next door to Alfred's and is actually connected by that door over yonder," He motioned towards said door. "and if you need anything, all you gotta do is holler."

"D-do I have to scream, 'yee-haw'…?"

"Uh.. hehe... no, you don't. Alfred thinks that's how we Texans call one another, so I just go on along with it… it's kinda funny, if you think about it." The Texan chuckled to himself. "I tell you what."

A pause.

"Tell me what?" Arthur asked…

"I just told you."…

Another pause…

"Never mind… but again, if you need anything, don't be afraid to ask. We're both gentlemen here. See you later, Mr.-

"Arthur," the Brit corrected. "You can call me, Arthur, Austin."

Austin smiled. "Well alright then, Arthur. I'll be seein' you around." The southerner winked goodbye and walked his way back to the living area where the sounds of blown kisses and "bonjour, mon ami" could be heard.

OoO

Arthur plopped on the bed [newly stripped of the rubbish they called a comforter and replaced with his British flag comforter] (with matching pillows!) and thought about, (again) what the hell he had gotten himself into. He had already finished his unpacking and was now, due to lack of activity, left to think upon himself even more of his itching for someone to walk in and inform him of dinner. He could only imagine what the queen would say in a drunken stupor at his moping about.

"KNOCK KNOCK!"

"As it is not the main door being yelled at, I'm going to guess that Alfred is the one calling?"

The American opened the not-so-secret door, "What's up, bro? You've just been stuck up here all freaking day?"

"I suppose… You called?"

Alfred plopped on the bed beside Arthur, gaining a blush to which he had no notice of. They both looked up at the ceiling in a comfortable silence, (you know, the one that Alfred could possibly compare with to a monologue from a certain movie *cough Pulp Fiction cough*) Arthur could feel the body heat from the American… yearning, as they lay beside one another, to stare deeply into the sky blue eyes and to kiss the soft pink lips, causing the Brit to crave the taste of salt and beef. The hue from his cheeks spread to deepen the blush to a red so dark, it would make a Spaniard or Italian begin to salivate.

Oh God, what the bloody hell is going through that git's head…

As Arthur was about to scream from the silence, Alfred shifted just in time to catch the Englishman's steamy complexion.

Bullocks…

"Hey, man. Are you okay?" The worry in the American's eyes was hard to miss. Arthur's desire at this point was becoming unbearable.

*Blush* "I'm fine, you damn git… why?"

Their eyes were locked for a moment until it was broken by an arrogant smile.

"Just making sure, dude. Nothing to worry about." Alfred stood up, stretched, and checked his watch. "Crap, is that the time? I'm supposed to be making sure the cooks are doing the food right!" he smiled then. "I hope you like it, Iggy… I've done something special for all the countries."

Arthur's heart smiled for him at the American's kindness…

"I'm gonna be marked as the best host ever after this is over!"

Smile gone.

Alfred said his hurried good-bye, leaving the Brit alone once more. Arthur was starting to believe he would never be able to have any sort of a conversation with the American….. maybe he should find something to do, to occupy his time…

His eyes darted to the door connecting his room with Alfred's….

Thump… thump… thump

His footsteps seemed to synchronize with his heart beat, getting louder as he neared the target, not knowing he was even moving until his hand felt the cold touch of a doorknob.

Arthur winced at the creak of the door made upon opening, and as he peered his shaggy head through, he was suddenly frozen at the sight which pierced his green eyes.

…

END CHAPTER 2

Yay! So there is the second chapter and my first cliffhanger XD

I'm so proud of myself.

I'm going to go ahead and point out that as I am writing this chapter, I am also experimenting with my writing styles…. Please, please, please tell me what you guys think about the dialogue! Is it too much? And I am very sorry the Narrator interrupted so much… (Hey! I thought I was giving very good insight and in a way, I am helping you out a bit. You could have missed important details!) Yeah, I'm not even going to argue with you…. You aren't real. (Guurrrl please! *puts up The Hand*) Must…. Refrain… from talking to self… in order to preserve self-dignity and more importantly… sanity. (Maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh!)

O_o - rational Sarah

Also, I'd like to apologize for the random conversation with Texas… I made up the character with Bay and I wanted to use it lol. Y'all will see why in a later chapter. XP

So yeah, thanks again for reading and I will try my hardest to stay on top of things!

[Again, I really do appreciate the feedback… so yeah… don't hesitate.]

Snozberries taste like Snozberries!